Wax And Wayne - Tumblr Posts
Currently reading the book right after Alloy of Law, (forget what it’s called and I’m too lazy to go get it) and it’s so fun seeing little pointers to the original cast of characters. Like, I’ll see their name or something and I’ll be like “Oh! It’s them! I know them!” Almost like a dog seeing another dog?
Wayne: *pulls out dueling canes* It is time to eat!
Wax: You mean fight?
Wayne: Don't play with your food, Wax. *menaces foes with dueling canes chopsticks*
Foe: What is wrong with him?
Wax: Your guess is as good as mine. *sighs and pulls out his guns*
Brought to you by, what if Wayne learned about chopsticks? And what are chopsticks but mini dueling canes?
“Constable Colms,” he said, scratching his chin. “Can you make any sense of this?” He showed her the drawing, which proved to be a crude sketch of Constable Gorglen as a giraffe hiding in a constable’s uniform. It said Approved by Expert Types at the bottom.
“I’ll talk to Wayne,” she promised.
Reddi sighed, then slipped the paper into a very large folder on the corner of his desk—the one where he kept complaints about Wayne. Reddi had evidently stopped returning it to the cabinet.
-- The Lost Metal, Chapter 10
Wayne on his list leaves noseball tickets for the first game for everyone.
Except, of course, he does so by giving Wax like 30 tickets.
Wax, the note says, make sure everyone goes. Tickets for you and Steris and Melaan and Marasi and Allik and Ranette and Jaxy and the kids. Don't know how often all you or Steris or Marasi or Ranette are fucking, so in case you've done a lot of it and have a big brood, I got you a lot of tickets. Wear a hat.
I am a fucking artist.
@girlgeniusevents Day Three: Jagerkin & Crossover
wayne just has absolute jäger energy.
in the middle of a fight he stops to shop clothes off the guy he defeated
he believes in hats
his relationship with hats is unmatchable
book 1 plot is he loses his hat and tries to get it back
he's undyingly loyal
eager for a fight
knows how to start a bar fight
brawler in an age where there's shooty things
thinks getting shot at is a form of affection
absolutely would go up to someone and say "nize hat" (and eat it off their head)
inspired by one of my favorite panels of girl genius.
oh, and if they weren't stick figures, wax would be pulling him back by his suspenders.
I keep imagining Wax and Wayne bits that are of the form...
Wayne: <some wild idea like> We lost our horses, but there's some giraffes right there. I've always wanted to ride a giraffe.
Wax: Wayne, no.
And use Wax to contrast Wayne, and it's fun! But I feel their dynamic is more like...
Wayne: We lost our horses, but there's some giraffes right there. I've always wanted to ride a giraffe.
Wax: Yeah, giraffes, hmmmm... Yes! That's perfect! *pause* Wait, you haven't ridden a giraffe yet?
Like Wax usually can come up with a plan, but it has just one hole, and somehow he always manages to slot into it Wayne's seemingly infeasible ideas in the most reasonable sounding way.
Probably happens 'cause Wax just constantly lands in outlandish situations, which is exactly when thinking normally gets you nowhere and you need to pull out your handy dandy Wayne-level idea generator.
All to say, this is my apology post to Wax for making him seem like a boring man who doesn't appreciate chaos. He supports chaos so hard that chaos finds him for moral support.
I mean, he did name his extremely docile horse Destroyer and all.
completely lost it when wax and steris named their son maxillium, because of *course*
but imagine if we got nuliana (goes by nu) and gilbillius (nickname gibbus because nu had a hard time saying gilbillius at all growing up and it stuck) (he prefers gil but it's far too late)
we can throw in a crescent or something for good measure too
WAIT! im a fool
new kandra baby named NuMoon i demand it
completely lost it when wax and steris named their son maxillium, because of *course*
but imagine if we got nuliana (goes by nu) and gilbillius (nickname gibbus because nu had a hard time saying gilbillius at all growing up and it stuck) (he prefers gil but it's far too late)
we can throw in a crescent or something for good measure too
Steris had calculated when Wax needed to make his jump, and when the time comes to remind him, she does so. She had expected that he would need a couple minutes to disengage from whatever he was doing, but as fate would have it, he had just returned from the john, so he's out the door practically immediately.
Steris calls him back with a "Wait!" because he's early (even though she knows it won't matter to a Coinshot when there's so much rail to Push off of). He looks back, and Steris plants one on him.
Wax kinda has a moment of oh my wife and she has to push him off the train to keep him on schedule.
[Inspired by this]
Since the asks are open, could you do Wax and Wayne from mistborn
Thanks for sending this in!
Alright, let's start with Waxillium. (Side note, his name is fantastic)
For Wax:
The Knight of Swords- This card speaks to a blunt, intelligent, and wary man. This knight is a defender of the people.
The Emperor, Reversed- With the Emperor being seen as a card of control and authority, this card in reverse speaks to a distrust of that authority, where is controls.
And finally, The Five of Swords- this one speaks to his wariness, and the conflict of his position.
And for Wayne:
We’re starting with the Devil here- This card speaks to a love of excess and impulsivity. His habit of stealing accents, for example!
On next to the Two of Wands- this, in my mind for Wayne, this speaks to his multi-faceted skill set.
And finally, we turn to the Three of Swords. This is a tricky card when it pops up in readings, but in my mind it speaks to his critical nature, especially when discerning the facets of a voice.
Admittedly, I don’t know too much about these two. I hope I did alright!
I heard people are getting their Sel boxes with wax seals!
Wax. Ladrian. Seals.
Oh shoot. Plural. I can fix that.
Yeah?
yeah.
Questioners: what was your inspiration for Wayne?
Branderson: i once dropped a hat under a cabbage leaf and this grown man popped out and started making dick jokes.
He is currently at large and he is unstoppable
If you want to stop him, you'll have to think like him. Unfortunately, he is incomprehensible
He is holding me hostage
Guys.
Wayne is literally a pack rat.
Can you imagine Wax finding out what we make our drink cans out of “you drink out of cans? Odd, ALIMINUM CANS? AND YOU THROW THEM AWAY?!?!?”
I need an entire Wayne and Hoid book. Right now. @brandonsanderson the people have spoken.
WAYNEEEEE
I fucking love Wayne. Like, he had my heart in the Alloy of Law but him in Shadows of Self really is just peak.
SPOILERS FOR SHADOWS OF SELF/WAX & WAYNE SERIES
"I heard voices in my head once too, you know."
"You did?"
"Sure. Gave me a fright. I banged my head against the wall until I went unconscious. Never heard them again! Ha! Showed 'em good, I did. If rats move in, best thing to do is burn their nest and send 'em packing."
"And the nest... was your head?"
"Yup."
~~~
"I missed her. What did she leave for me?"
"Yes... she said I was to slap you." Darriance admitted.
"Aw, she does care. See that, Wax, she cares!"
Wax nodded absently as Wayne tried to force Darriance to slap him across the rear --
"Sir," Darriance said, turning away from Wayne's proffered posterior.
~~~
"Nice door," Wayne said softly, "Good wood." He kicked it open.
~~~
"Well, you know," Wayne said. "It's like I often say..."
"Greet every morning with a smile. That way it won't know what you're planning to do to it?"
"No, not that one."
"Until you know it ain't true, treat every woman like she has an older brother that is stronger than you are?"
"No, no... Wait, I said that?"
"Yes," Wax said, turning back to his notes, "It was a very chivalrous moment for you."
"Rusts, I should really write these things down."
"I believe that is another thing you often say." Wax made a notation. "Unfortunately, you'd first have to learn how to write."
"Now, that's unfair." Wayne said, walking over to Wax's desk and poking around in its drawers. "I can write--I know four whole letters and one's not even in my name!" (which is the funniest thing to me because this implies he only knows three letters in his name)
Wax smiled. "Are you going to o tell me what you always say?"
Wayne found a bottle in the bottom drawer and lifted it up, dropping in the lace he'd taken from outside as a replacement. "If you're going to have to do something awful, stop b Wax's room and trade for some of his rum first."
"I don't believe you've ever said that."
"I just did."
...
"Wanna piece of advice?"
"From you? Probably not. But please feel free."
"You should stop by Wax's room before you go." Wayne said, trailing toward the door, "and pinch some of his rum."
"The rum you just pocketed?"
Wayne hesitated, then took the rum out of his pocket, "Ah, mate. Sorry. Tough for you." He shook his head. Poor fellow.
~~~
Wayne is me, I am Wayne. I am a lesbian but that is my soulmate. Wayne can do no wrong, and when he does he pays for it in the most heart wrenching way (reading that part of the book killed me).
Rereading Mistborn Era 2 like it didn’t absolutely ruin me the last time I read it. I love it so much.
I love Wax and Wayne’s established friendship in era 2 of Mistborn. They have so much history and that’s part of what makes them so much fun to read!!!
My dad is rereading Wheel of Time for like the fifth time. Don’t get me wrong I love those books and reread them very regularly, but I just don’t get why he can reread that and not even try Mistborn era 2?! Like I’ve tried so hard to convince him, but he’s afraid it will end like era 1! I already told him it doesn’t! He just is stubborn!!