What Have I Done - Tumblr Posts
Warning: nonsense gifs from old classic musicals incoming
I can’t stop
send help
Warning: nonsense gifs from old classic musicals incoming
I can’t stop
send help
What the actual fuck I didn't know i was gonna get haunted by the spirits of the vegans who died in combat
This vegan baking show is unreal…
Please forgive me
I saw your notification pop up in the top of my screen as just “*ahem* CARNIVAL JAX” and for a split second got so excited thinking you’d done some au art with him sdfjgfgfg
🥺daww,, okay, just for you pine tree <3
Jax being so genuinely unwell for the pinetree <3
kofi✨
what have i done to chat
ᴮᵀᵂ ᵗʰᶦˢ ᶦˢ ᵐʸ ᵈᵉˢᵏᵗᵒᵖ ʷᵃˡˡᵖᵃᵖᵉʳ
i made his hair darker to get more of a white for the blanc pic and i removed the white layer and now he just looks goth.
what have i done to chat
ᴮᵀᵂ ᵗʰᶦˢ ᶦˢ ᵐʸ ᵈᵉˢᵏᵗᵒᵖ ʷᵃˡˡᵖᵃᵖᵉʳ
In my town half of the villagers are dogs and wolfs. We have a tiny chipmunk who criticize my clothes and a depressed human boy who likes to cross dress. A mad duck and an alligator who likes roleplay and an anteater who has somehow become my dad. So so far the whole mayor thing is going great.
Yes! A big portion of Laurent's character is that he uses the fact that his looks make him seem incompetent on purpose! He's trained in secret to become strong enough to kill Damianos, and I think it's "But Green for a Season" that reveals how Jord discovered Laurent had gotten very good with his discreet lessons.
Even though he loses against Damen during their fight in the third book, he still proves himself to be a challenge; what he lacks in raw power against an enemy, he makes up for with his tactics and dirty fighting. He'll use the environment to his advantage, upset and anger his opponent, and he's not above a knee to the groin if it'll give him an edge. When Laurent is fighting Kastor at the end, Damen even considers that if Laurent hadn't been both injured from Govart and his mind clouded with rage - if he were actually focusing with his greatest strength, his mind - he might have even beat Damen in that very fight! Laurent had been on the defensive and a victim for so long that it's often easy to forget that the guy has been training and pushing himself to make up for anything he lacks in order to escape his underdog position.
The only weakness Laurent has is that for most of the books, he thinks he has to do everything alone. The idea that Damen would ever want to help him, wouldn't betray him the instant Laurent didn't have something to reign him in, and that anyone would actively believe in him - it's almost too much for Laurent to fully wrap his head around. He can't compete with his uncle, that's what's been drilled into his head from the most vulnerable point of his life. He's younger, and he can't do anything about it. He's smart, but the Regent will ALWAYS have more experience, will always have the advantage, and Laurent has had every person who might support him and believe in him either abandon him or be killed with every tiny misstep.
The second book, Laurent would have never managed to beat his uncle in this ONE maneuver had Damen not been there to A: stop him from trying to go off on his own and "play along" with his uncle to the point that he basically admits defeat, and B: has a partner who is offensively able to teach him everything his uncle refused to teach him when it comes to being a leader. The only reason Laurent even brought him along was because, begrudgingly, Damen could be temporarily useful. He knows Damen is Damianos from the very beginning, and so he uses their nights going over strategy to learn both the limits of his own people and how Akielons think. Laurent needs to learn how to be a king, something the Regent wouldn't have been keen to actually teach him while trying to outst him from the Veretian throne.
At the end of that book and the beginning of the third, Laurent plays like he's fully prepared to work independently of Damen - or if he is going to work with him, he'll not be reliant upon Damen in any way. He knows Damen a little better now, but that can't instantly erase the confrontation six years in the making when Laurent wants to lash out and beat the shit out of Damen to prove that he didn't spend all this time trying his hardest and it still wasn't enough. It wasn't - Laurent had to painfully confess that he knew he could never beat Damen, and if Damen hadn't been such a good person, he would have lost.
The fact is, Laurent's greatest weakness is being in the mindset that he has to be strong enough and smart enough to do everything alone. Laurent became extremely self-sufficient, deadly in both body and mind, but being with Damen and even falling in love with him was doubly painful because not only is Damen a reminder that he isn't strong enough all on his own, but now his greatest asset is someone who he's spent all this time trying to overcome. It's a really awful struggle for him to accept that maybe someone can actually understand him and support him and be strong enough not to be hurt in the process.
A person? Being on his side?? Willingly??? Someone he doesn't have to protect 24/7???? But someone he WANTS to protect????? AND IT'S FUCKING DAMIANOS WHO HE HATES?????? BECAUSE HE'S A GOOD PERSON???????
In the third book, Laurent actively gives himself up to the Regent, and by Damen’s account, he fully believes no one was going to come for him. He didn't have a plan, he knew he could save Damen maybe but not himself. It's a bit of a weird final move for Laurent to have been saved by a plan that wasn't his own and barely Damen's, but it does showcase his weakness of giving up when he doesn't have a definitive plan in his uncle's domain - by contrast to Damen who never gives up hope even when things around him seem hopeless and he doesn't know what to do, YET.
And to the next point, Damen. We see everything (except one tiny chapter) from Damen's POV, and so by necessity, Damen has to be behind in most of Laurent's plans so that he can figure things out at the same time the readers do. In the first and especially the second book, Damen really is Laurent's slave. Laurent is in charge, Laurent calls the shots, Laurent's the one fighting this civil war with everything to both gain and lose. Laurent is the one to go somewhere, with Damen demanding to follow and help, and proving himself useful in the process. Damen really is just reacting to things happening around him, with the point of that book being him growing Laurent's trust to actually be allowed to do shit.
Damen's only "dumb" quality is that he simply recognizes things as facts, rather than hypothesize about what could be done in the future. He really is a reactive character, but it's entirely realistic if you think about how Akielons are compared to Veretians. Akielons think very straightforward; they take in what they know, work out something from it, and then conclude with a plan to execute - take in the new information gleaned, then rinse and repeat. Veretians think five steps ahead, ensure every action has at least two different purposes/meanings, make sure that even when they lose one thing, they can still gain another. Damen has the problem-solving and experience to react in the moment to Laurent's actions, but only when he sees the plan executing before his eyes.
Ever heard that symbolic thing about their culture designs? Akielons are very stripped down and simple with their clothing, Veretians have complex ties and strings that Damen complains are overly and unnecessarily extravagant? It's like that.
However Damen spends SO much time keeping up with Laurent's patterns that he actually starts to think like him. Damen is good at taking what he knows and making use of it. To be the King of Akielos, he had to know how war worked, how people worked, what customs and traditions and practices were common, what could be weapons and what could be problems. He simply adds Laurent's new perspective on life and the ways of the Veretians to his list of examples to pull from.
To be fair, Damen BEGINS the story slightly naive and spoiled. The whole reason Kastor shipped him off to Vere as a slave was because he refused to believe Kastor was anything more than the brother he had known. Before that instance, Damen didn't believe people could be more than they appeared on the surface. That's just how Akielon culture is. Heck, Damen even admits that he blindly followed his own father's perspective on life - he was the shining king, who could never do wrong, who fought and won battles with glory and grace, and always with honor. He beat back the slimy, conniving, distrustful snakes of Vere who could never be trusted to keep their word or worry about anyone other than themselves.
It's really good worldbuilding, because it's true that's how Veretians can be - not all of them, certainly, but it's also just a human thing, not exclusive to any culture. Some people are good, some are bad, and it's just normal for some people to have built a society where outsmarting others and building a reputation is the way you survive.
But after all his time actually getting to know Laurent and his people and their culture? Damen admits that though he would never speak ill of his father, he can't agree with the kind of king he was; Theomedes was a king who conquered, rather than tried to understand. Damen's father would have never tried to think like the enemy did, to differentiate one Veretian from another. Damen was only forced to see the differences when he saw Laurent and the Regent - Laurent was ultimately a good, kind person, but he was crushed under the weight and expectations and attacks from all sides, forced to become someone else entirely to play their game.
And it's ultimately Damen who has to convince Laurent that playing the game under his uncle's terms is always going to be how he loses. Laurent is thinking five moves ahead to try and keep up with his uncle who is six moves ahead. Instead, Laurent needs to forge his own path, not to be a piece on his uncle's board, but the king of his own. Where Damen is forced to learn Veretian cunning just to keep up (and he does so successfully, if not as good as Laurent who's been doing it much longer), Laurent is forced to learn Akielon straightforwardness and the simple fact that if he wants to win, he has to go into it believing he will - however delusional it seems to barge in, acting first, thinking later.
Veretians can be good people, use their cunning minds to do good things, to fight their enemies and maintain good and evil even within their own kingdom. Akielons can be loyal and headstrong, and if pointed in the right direction, they'll be paragons who'll fight for what they believe in even against all odds. Regardless of the kingdom, there are good and bad people inside it. Both princes need to learn it if they want to be kings, and though it takes a lot of pushing, they ARE willing to learn for their own survival.
Damen is a seriously strong warrior, that can't be argued, but he has EVERYTHING that makes him a born-leader. He recognizes strategies, opens his mind to new ideas, and in turn opens Laurent's mind as well. Laurent is cynical but extremely intelligent; he isn't lacking in any kingly quality beyond his own self-confidence, the belief that he can win after years of thinking all he could do was lose. The two of them really do work with one another, brains and brawn, as well as the potential to help the other recognize the benefits of their different ways of life.
TL;DR it's like this:
"My size," Laurent said, "is the usual. I am not made in miniature. It's a problem of scale, standing next to you."
What I feel the CaPri fandom sometimes fails to understand is that Damen only looks stupid compared to Laurent and Laurent only looks weak compared to Damen.
Damen is one of the few people who pick up on Laurent's schemes - sure, he picks up on things more slowly than Laurent, who has an insider's view of the situation and is actually the person in control of his schemes (in addition to his godlike intelligence), but Damen sees through what Laurent is doing more quickly than anyone else, even people who have known Laurent for years, and manages to keep up with his logic most of the time when no one else does. In book 1 he always manages to read a situation pretty accurately based on the knowledge he has - he can see what Laurent's options are and where the political lines are drawn, he just doesn't know how to mess with them as creatively as Laurent does.
Similarly, Laurent is one of the most competent fighters in the setting and only looks weak compared to Damen, the God of Warfare, who is like 2 meters tall and 2 meters wide. He's not some helpless uwu smol bean, he can hold his own, gives Damen a damn good fight even though he's been recently injured and fucks up several other people described as very strong fighters during the course of the series.
So I may or may not be slowly reverting back to my Sander Sides phase, and I may or many not have made an OC. _(:3 」∠)_
As I finished my rant, I noticed the silence that befell her.
She was in tears, her body faintly trembling from the poison that dripped from my words. I wish I could shield her from the rambling that slipped from my lips.
I couldn’t help that I am a vessel too broken to hold the decade old toxin; some malignancy stemmed from self loathing, some miasma brewed from mommy issues. I’ve tried hard to not let the past define me, I fought tooth and nails to not let the christening corrupt me; but whilst the demon on my shoulder shielded me from the memories of religious trauma, the angel on my shoulder unveiled the gaping scars that are to be tended to.
I let my guard down for a second, it was only a brief moment of weakness, but in that moment the dreaded truth slithered out like the serpent in the garden.
Turned out that my self discovery brought to light her darkest fear - that to love, I have to first scorn my maturation; that to love, I have to first abandon my progress thus far.
“Am I your destination or am I a just another stop along your way?” She tentatively asked.
I dreaded the truth, horrified by the answer that have lingered in my mind for way too long. Scared to let her fly free, terrified to assimilate.
It’s the journey that mattered, I would tell her; but it seemed so cruel, subjecting her to a mere passenger of my existence.
I was made to pick between honesty and loyalty, and I couldn’t bear to see the pain in her eyes. Sometimes mercy is deception, atrocious as it may be.
I’ve just been the logging posts without following the artist :(
i walk a lonely road
the only road that i have ever known
I made a horrible connection, during a discord conversation
Pail told me to draw him as the yellow hat carrying curious gerg.
Trump’s hair, Drake’s nose and mouth, and Ed Sheeran’s eyes
A Bradrick fueled post™
OKAYY SO I TRIED IT AND LOOK LOOK AT IT WHAT HAVE I DONE
Don't ask, this was based off of what I'm currently wearing in Papa's Paleteria To Go
Would this count as spoilers? /genq
Here's some more stuff below
No, thank you for making this blog so good! I love it and just really wanted a reference to it on a print.
Worth it! 💚
thanks @mauselet
It’s just after 2am, I’m reading a Star Wars fan fic where Anakin’s building a scanner to locate his transmitter bomb and I was reminded of a theory that I thought of last year: what if the transmitter bomb are really nanobots?
Think about it: nanobots can be programmed to go ‘boom’ and they would be hard to find and be in the body ‘somewhere’.