Brad Knew There Was No More Clear Or Better Place To Be Free To Express Yourself, To Be Who You Are Without

Brad knew there was no more clear or better place to be free to express yourself, to be who you are without judgement, and to promote positive self image of men who like men, than a fiercely competitive nationally televised drag competition that culminated in a paraded showdown of its self-proclaimed losers deemed so via unquestioned, ambiguous, and unwritten rules.

Did you get all of that? Read it again if you need to. The library will be open for a minute.

It was true. Just in the last ten minutes of that show viewers were forced to jump through more flossy hoops than in Fergie’s earring collection just to justify their own sanity and get hooked for another episode. It was hardly surprising straight women could relate. When it came to meeting the many sets of expectations and double standards put forth by society, were we not all consumed in various orders of intricate dance?

Brad knew he could make anything WERK in part because as a gay man he had to from the get go. He could make whatever was thrown at him WERK in the very same sense slapping the word irony on anything instantly made it ironic. The difference of course being irony didn’t actually take any work. What presented itself on the show was WERK, a hole different level (yes, hole is spelled correctly), and according to gay legend that made drag OK.

Anyone could make something ironic, and it’s usually by accident. Where it gets tricky is doing it with any thread of intention. You sure better make like Madonna and make it an art or you are that person wearing the printed t-shirt and the embroidered hat that does speak truth as proclaimed but don’t realize it’s actually about them.

Eeek. That’s always painful to come across for many reasons. For one, it’s a good guess the poorly threaded failed to friend any gay men or black women because neither have the time for something like that. Each would save the other a step at the register and likely ask for the money since they’re just throwing it away anyway.

Slap a WERK on instead, and what you already knew to be nothing is suddenly something because the gays navigate more than a google of hoops just to walk out that front door. Yes. That was worth repeating.

That’s right. No need to ask ladies, the ‘Amens!’ are are all up in here already. It is just how it is right now. At least that’s what it felt like to Brad.

As many in the erotic dancer and male model industries, Brad held no doubt that show went mainstream via the same well mirrored thread as the flick Pretty Woman just with the reverse set of players. Not everyone was on board, but it was enough sassy razzle dazzle in the right place at the right time with just enough tattered frames of attention to get through.

Both earned enough money to let ruffled feathers go, and it remain tolerated by the others as it’s understood as a one time deal. Once deemed ironic something can’t be made more ironic. The same notion apparently applied here.

Brad also knew if you make the impossible WERK the first time, you’re not going to go through it again. It’s far too exhausting and who wants to live by the skin of their teeth where they already do? You’ve been there. You are there. You made it happen, and any decent queen knows how to make her peace…

‘Did everyone not see the mf rain just now?!? Sky. Water. Fell. You’re welcome. Ok then. I gots to go!’

The door slams and that’s what happened.

WERK!

The show goes on because it must.

It was here Brad heard the snap of his own finger.

Pulled out of his own thoughts and still leaning against the palm tree in his shiny new speedo, Brad realized he was really gay. Like really really REALLY gay.

Brad let out a sigh and took note of his bulge.

Well, that certainly explained having a boyfriend.

It explained quite a bit actually.

Looking at things a little closer, Brad could say this much as to his newly realized gayness…

As long as he put out, Brad felt confident his boyfriend Chris would be ok with everything.

And that he was.

For the longest time Brad thought Celsius was a cellulite cream.

Brad spoke to Hernando for 45 minutes before realizing he wasn’t real.

His boyfriend Chris lol’d. “You got hooked on gold Brighteyes.”

“Ugh. Chris be nice. The future is really confusing alright. I don’t even know if it was ok to use the present tense in that last sentence. Do you?”

Chris looked to his boyfriend and shrugged his shoulders emphasizing his need for an answer. “So…”

“What? I don’t know Chris. I don’t know. Ok? I don’t know future tense. Are you happy?”

Brad placed his hands on his hips glanced at their California king bed then back to Chris. “So does this mean I am supposed to apologize for laughing at you?”

“I don’t know Brad. I also don’t know why Hernando would let me ramble for 45 freaking minutes about the provocative styles of the underwear line Candyman. Why would anyone do that to someone anyway?”

Chris paused to take a deep breath. He didn’t need to go down that path any further. “As for an apology my guess is probably not as so far the future is pretty rude.”

Brad agreed. “Well, Hernado will never apologize so why should I? Can we just fast forward to whatever’s next? What’s happening after the future anyway?”

“Oh god something! I hope.” Chris paused to take another breath even deeper than before. “Well, let me just say this. If the future really is all there is, I seriously think we should sue.”

After agreeing the extra ‘is’ in Chris’ last statement rang funny, the two made a pack that if it was still the future in a week, they’d start asking around for referrals so they could sue ‘the children.’ They were future and they would pay up for anything and everything subpar. If it had to come out of their parents pockets so be it. Someone needed to take responsibility for the future and it may not be the worst idea to make it an adult.

Brad then reminded Chris not to ask Hernando if it came down to that as it would be counterproductive but didn’t specify the why. It still read as a good point nonetheless.

📣💛🤤

Well felt like a deep subject to Chris. Could his boyfriend Brad circle back to Barbiecore bulge’s? It was much more interesting and felt quiet relevant. Maybe Brad could feel it too.

The ‘fake it until you make it' thing in America never sat right with Chris as there was always the chance that the people who said you made it were doing the same thing.

Chris made bath time SOOOOO much fun.