RFA + Saeran With MC With Depression

RFA + Saeran with MC with depression

these depression symptoms are based solely on my personal experience with depression. everyone experiences things differently if you or someone you love is going through depression no matter what symptoms they show or don’t show, they deserve love, compassion, and help. it does get better. help is out there and worth the effort. you aren’t alone.

Also my depression is almost entirely biochemical, meaning that when I’m on my medicine my depression is generally controlled very easily. This is why medication plays such a major role in these head cannons. Everyone’s depression treatment is different some people benefit more from counseling than medication. Some people require hospitalization some need tender in home care. Find what works for you and stick with it. I promise, it’s worth it.

Jumin

-        his approach is diligence.

-        he was so busy he didn’t notice at first

-        it was when the maid contacted him to ask if MC was okay that he started to pay attention

-        the maid had mentioned the MC had been in bed when she came to clean the last three days

-        Jumin knew MC wasn’t lazy far from it actually if she wasn’t busying herself with one of her many hobbies or planning the next RFA party she was usually visiting a friend not lying in bed.

-        something was wrong. he came home right away to check on her

-        she was surprised and apologized profusely as though she had been caught doing something wrong

-        “love I’m not angry, I’m worried.” she smiled lightly and assured him she was fine just tired recently

-        so Jumin watched closer, noticed more

-        he saw her eat less, sleep more, her knitting didn’t progress, nor did her reading or writing. the party planning came along but even it seemed to go slower.

-        it was when she started to leave sentences hanging that he put his foot down

-        “honey bunny really, please. I don’t need a doctor.”

-        “you aren’t yourself love. you don’t even talk to me anymore”

-        “we, we talk.”

-        “no I talk you listen. I miss you. your right beside me but you feel so far away”

-        “I probably just need my medicine”

-        “medicine. you didn’t tell me you take medicine! medicine for what are you okay?!?”

-        “I, I didn’t want to worry you! It’s not a big deal honestly I shouldn’t even need it. it’s so stupid. I take an anti-depressant or I’m supposed to. it’s hard to remember sometimes and I forget.

-        in an instant Jumin was hugging her carding his fingers through her hair holding her tighter than he had ever held anyone

-        “bring me your medicine. you’re taking it right now. from now on I won’t let you forget”

-        he came to bed every night with a glass of water and MC’s medicine.

-        he found support groups, funded research, sought out the best counselors and psychologists.

-        he hated that he couldn’t immediately fix the problem but if he couldn’t cure her then he would get her the best treatment money could buy

Yoosung

-        his approach is overprotective.

-        he first noticed how restless MC was. she would switch videos before they started, change apps before one had even finished loading.

-        “MC are you okay?” but she assured him she was

-        next he noticed that she wasn’t leaving the house as often, she didn't leave to see her friends and she hadn’t called her family in weeks. messages and texts would either be ignored or answered with single word replies.

-        even their conversations seemed far more one sided

-        something was off so he asked for help.

-        the chatroom was abuzz with worry about MC and Yoosung couldn’t keep up with all the advice

-        then he got a call. from V

-        V worried that MC might be depressed offered to give yoosung some numbers to call, doctors to see.

-        yoosung hung up and confronted MC immediately angry & scared

-        “is it true? why didn't you tell me?”

-        “it’s not bad really. most of the time I just need my medicine and I’m fine but,”

-        “but what”

-        mc see blinked back tears “I, I lost them in the move and I can’t get more till the end of the month. i thought, I thought I could make it but I’m so tired Yoosung”

-        he didn’t know what to say so he just held her. he stayed holding her all night”

-        the next morning, he helped her search the whole apartment and when they still couldn't find them they went to the pharmacy together to explain the situation

-        yoosung watched her carefully for weeks’ afterword to make sure she was okay

-        too anyone else he would have seemed paranoid but MC knew why he was so carful

-        he was shook after rika and wasn't going to take any chances with her

 Saeyoung

-        his approach is patient.

-        he knew the signs already

-        heck he had lived them

-        so when he noticed MC’s jokes had taken a darker turn he decided to watch her closer

-        and he saw it, saw her slowly slip into the habits he had seen so many times in the mirror.

-        so he did what he could. He held her when she shut down.

-        sought her out when she would hide

-        more often than not he simply sat in the room with her like she had with him. Sat near her so that when she felt like talking he would be there

-        after days of sitting next to her as waiting for her to reach out it happened

-        “I’m not okay”

-        this was progress since for days she had insisted that she was fine and simply just tired

-        “what do you need” he asked gently intertwining their fingers

-        “will you help me get my medicine. I ran out. I don’t know when I was supposed to get the refill”

-        this was something he could do and he would do anything for her

-        it does sooth his conscience a bit too know this was something she struggled with before meeting him and not because of him

 Zen

-        His approach is by far the gentlest

-        The first thing he noticed was her sleep.

-        She tossed and turned when before she would happily snuggle into his arms and stay there happily all night

-        Then he noticed her smile seemed more forced than before

-        She didn’t cry much but she also didn’t laugh like she had before

-        When she started having trouble falling asleep he sang her lullabies

-        When she started eating less he started learning to cook

-        When she left in the middle of his play and hid in the theater bathroom. He asked for answers.

-        Gently trying to coax her out of the bathroom to talk to him

-        The second the door is open he’s inside and holding her. She sits in his lap and cries for the first time

-        He sings to her gently and helps calm her down until her breathing evens out and she can talk

-        “I’m just so tired. I’m tired of everything Zen. I want to go home. Even when I’m home I want to go home I know it doesn’t make sense. I know. I’m just, I’m so tired”

-        He holds her tight telling her that it’s okay. That he’ll fix it.

-        Once she’s asleep he’s calling Jaehee. She’s smart and if anyone could find the help MC needs it’s her

 Jaehee

-        Her approach is slightly clinical

-        The first thing she notices is MC skips movie night

-        Then she sees her sleep in and skip a lot of her self-care

-        MC is still working as hard as ever but she’s exhausted all the time

-        She’s worried and when MC refuses to go to the doctor she does the research herself

-        Then she confronts MC too ask if her guess is right

-        when MC admits to getting off her meds jaehee goes rigid

-        jaehee is worried. everything about this feels uncertain and she hates feeling uncertain

-        So Jaehee does what she does best.

-        She plans. She learns. She works.

-        She knows the medication and how it works.

-        She sets up an entire routine for MC taking her medicine and doing all the self-care things that are supposed to help

-        She insists that MC see a councilor since she admits emotions aren’t her strong suit.

Saeran

-        His first tip-off is when she forgets to refresh the water in the flower vases

-        The second is when she skips walks in favor of staying in bed

-        It feels like he’s losing her and its making him panic a bit

-        he sees how lifeless her eyes are when he tells about the newest garden blooms

-        she’s not her positive happy go lucky self anymore

-        he hates it when she smiles and it looks so broken

-        he makes her a bowl of ice-cream and she only eats a fourth of it

-        he’s getting worried and trusting relationships are pretty new to him

-        but secrecy and information hacking aren’t so that’s what he goes back to

-        he finds your medical records and see’s you have an expired prescription for anti-depressants

-        he confronts you angrily and questions what’s wrong with you

-        how can you expect him to get treatment when you won’t even take your medicine

-        you explain that you were on your way to get your meds when you got called to mint eye

-        and then in all the chaos you forgot, and at this point you’d have to see your doctor again

-        your tired it doesn’t seem worth it

-        he looks guilty and ashamed but you pull him into your arms

-        he apologizes for everything with mint eye again and you can feel him shaking

-        you assure him it isn’t his fault, it was bad circumstances and bad timing not him

-        he makes you promise to go to the doctor you make him promise to go with you

-        you could do anything together after all

-        he wants you happy if you need this medicine then he wants you to have it

The RFA boys and how they express love

I swear someday I’ll play jaehee’s route and I’ll come update this to include her but right now I’m on the route of pain and sorrow and I don’t know how to stop. its only like day 4 of the “another story route” and I don’t see this shiz getting any less painful. if anyone wants to send me jumin or yoosung fluff it would be much appreciated oh and also is there an easier way to tag?

anyways without further ado. I hope you guys enjoy my take on how the RFA boys express their love.

Jumin

If its planned: spoiling you he buys gifts. he loves your smile when he surprises you with a gift and you love the goofy grin on his face when he gets to spoil you. At first it made you nervous. You didn’t like the idea that he thought he had to buy your love. You didn’t want him thinking you stayed with him just because of the money, especially since you would gladly stay with him even if he had nothing. You confronted him about this after your first valentines together. You didn’t plan on crying though and the second the first tear fell you could see Jumin’s heart break. He explained that he wasn’t giving you gifts to make you stay, he bought you gifts because he would pass by something and think of you. He bought you gifts because even the thought of your smile made his day better. he bought you gifts because he loved you and not to make you love him. You launched yourself at him catching him off guard you tumbled to the floor together as you nuzzled into his chest. He laughed at your antics as he wrapped his arms around you in kind.

If its unplanned: physical affection He isn’t used to affection. Especially romantic affection so his tolerance is fairly low. He can tend to get swept up in the heat of his emotions so when he gets overwhelmed by his feelings towards you there’s only really one outlet. (wink wink) he doesn’t enjoy PDA however so more often than not he’ll whisk you away to somewhere private. The second his lips meet yours you practically drown in his passion and you wonder how anyone could call this man a robot when he his every movement was filled with love and heart. You suppose you could be the only one who has the privilege of seeing him like that and pride wells up within you as you lean into his embrace. You love him like this just like you love him when he sits at his desk working intently. Everything about him seems to call out to you and in this moment you hope he can feel it.

Yoosung

If its planned: games with you fun it this cutie pies middle name. he plans dates complete with games and roleplaying adventures (look at his valentines DLC where y’all played like it was your first date). He enjoys nothing more than seeing you laugh and play with him. Sometimes he worries you won’t take him seriously though especially after someone else treats him like a child. You always know this has happened because he’s not up for your normal games. He gets agitated when you call him puppy and cutie. This is your cue to remind him that being cute doesn’t make him less manly. You tell him you love his cute side because no matter how hard your day was he never fails to make you smile. You remind him you chose him. You chose him and no one else.

If it isn’t planned: takes care of you this precious boy is all about acts of service. You wonder if it has anything to do with his Kink desire for praise. He wants to do things for you. Anything! He likes to cook for you and help you study or teach you a new mechanic in your game. It makes him feel strong even if he can’t beat someone in a fist fight. The more he helps you the more useful and secure he feels. You assure him that he doesn’t have to do anything to earn your love and affection “you just have to be yourself puppy! I love you for you not what you do!” but you let him keep doing things because it gives you a good excuse to praise him and the look in his eyes when you praise him it far too good to give up. He gets all red and starry eyed you could almost swear he’s having an out of body experience. You’ll admit you get a bit uneasy when other people praise him because of this though, that being said you don’t want to stop it if it makes him happy. So instead you simply double up on your cuddles and praise when you get home.

 Saeyoung

If its planned: hand made gifts for Saeyoung a gift means nothing if it’s not personalized. When he gives a gift its always handmade or hand built maybe. Either way its hours spent to prove how much he cares about you. You can guarantee that a gift from him is more than the sum of its parts. He likes watching you interact with his latest gadget discovering all its hidden uses and programs. His favorite part is when he can tell its surprised you, he thinks the mixture of shock and mirth on you face is the most beautiful thing he’s ever seen. Every gift he gives you gets increasingly complex, from that first robotic cat made to simply keep you company to his latest gift which even after 3 months your still finding new things the glowing long cat robot (extendo-elly the 4th) can do.

If its unplanned humor he loves to make you smile. His jokes and memelord nature wasn’t completely for show. He genuinely enjoys seeing you laugh. He’s constantly looking for new ways to have you ROTFL’ing. Once he sent you a meme completely in binary just so he could watch you translate it and face palm while you giggled to yourself. He considers the times when you punch him playfully tears of laughter in your eyes to be a rousing success. He learned pretty fast you enjoyed his cosplay that you always thought one of two things. You either thought it was beautiful or you had to practically bite you hand to stop your giggles. His showmanship only grows from there. If you’re feeling down, he makes it his life’s purpose to bring your smile back even if it means making a fool of himself (especially if it means making a fool of himself).

 Zen

If its planned quality time Zen just wants to spend time with you. He likes being near you even if you’re doing nothing. When he does his strength training you do yoga, when he practices lines in the living room your sitting on the floor laptop in hand. He likes to be near you so he plans date’s where you can simply be together. Stargazing, motorcycle rides, even trips to museums if that’s what your into (though you might have to help him understand why that stuff is important). he likes catching glimpses of you while acting, hearing your voice while he’s chatting with a fan, recognizing your perfume as you rush past him for an onset project. It’s partly why he wanted you as his manager, the other part was that you where damn good at it. You could juggle the RFA party and his shooting schedule and the upcoming auditions like you were born for it. Honestly he was just so thrilled to be with you whenever possible.

If its unplanned praise let’s face it this boy is dramatic as all get out. So when he gets overwhelmed he can’t help but revert to those cheesy lines from his plays. He’ll shower you in praise and love and you’re always a little worried that one day he’ll just start spouting Shakespeare. he calls you princess and angel while fawning over you because he just can’t help it he loves you and if he can’t spirit you away to a nice private place when he can unleash the beast, then he’ll simply have to verbally drown you in praise and love.

this boy it too freaking cute who gave him the right?!?

Yoosung es como un sol andante que puede dar color y vida a tu día nublado <3

RFA and how MC gets them to sleep

I hope ya’ll enjoy these. do I need to make a masterpost? since I’ve got a couple of these now I don’t know. their all pretty recent so maybe its not necessary. 

Jumin

-        You’ve gotten it down to a science at this point

-        “darling? I can’t sleep.” You call from the door way of his home office “do you mind reading to me? Like you did that first night?” that’s what gets him the mention of your first night with him.

-        “I, of course dearest” he says wearily placing a stack of papers to the side “just until you fall asleep though I do need to finish this”

-        You frowned a little at that. He hadn’t slept much these past weeks and when he did it was fitful and short lived. Tonight he would sleep. You would be sure of that.

-        “would you sit in bed with me? Just for a while? The bed is too big and cold for me to fall asleep without you.”

-        “you have plenty of blankets my love” he said narrowing his eye’s at you suspiciously

-        “it’s not about the blankets. I don’t love the blankets. I love you” then you saw it in his eye’s warmth, love and the tell tail signs of his resolve crumbling as he gave into your request. You didn’t like using his love for you like this but he had to sleep.

-        “I really can’t say no to you my love” he sighed following you towards the king sized bed you shared

-        “thank you honey bunny” you said pulling him to lay beside you leaning him against a pile of pillows so he was reclining enough to sleep comfortably but upright enough to read. Where he not so fatigued he may have questioned how you had planned it all so perfectly.

-        You handed him the book you two where currently reading and situated yourself against his chest humming happily

-        One chapter later and you could feel him running his fingers through your hair trying to see if you were awake

-        You stayed still careful to count your breath to keep it deep and slow

-        He sighed and settled himself a little before resigning to stay rather than wake you by leaving

-        After fifteen minutes you could hear his gentle and quite snores

-        Success.

-        The next morning you woke early and shut off his alarm before calling Jaehee

-        “mission accomplished Jaehee” you say smirking “he wont be in today but tomorrow he’ll be back to tip top shape”

-        “thank you MC. when he pushes himself this hard it often falls to me to fix the things his fatigue lets fall through the cracks. One day of rest saves us weeks of mistakes”

-        “a stitch in time saves nine as they say. Oh but I have to go if I’m not there when he wakes up he’ll try to go back to work”

-        “of course, and again thank you MC.”

  Yoosung

-        Honestly if you could just get him into bed you knew he would be out like a light

-        It was getting him to the bed that was difficult

-        So you played the last card in you deck, the ace.

-        “yoosungie? I’m going to shower and get ready for bed okay?”

-        “sounds good!”

-        “unless, maybe you wanted to join me?”

-        “jo- join you?” he spluttered turning away from his computer wide eyed and beet red

-        “well I thought, it might save time, and water and it might be fun.” With a wink you turned towards the bathroom where you already had everything prepared

-        Honestly the shared shower was simply a bonus to your plan

-        Call the fun times you shared a happy consequence of the plan.

-        You washed his hair with lavender scented shampoo to help you both relax and calm down

-        And on the way out you hand him the pajamas you had prepared

-        “you planned this”

-        “of course I planned this” you chuckled kissing his forehead “noona takes care of her puppy”

-        You could see his face darken and feel the shiver that ran down his spine at that and you couldn’t help the laugh that escaped your lips at the way his eye’s seemed to cloud for a fraction of a second

-        You pressed a quick kiss to his lips before pulling him to the bedroom where you sat him on the bed to towel dry his hair a bit more

-        “I love you” he whispers and you smiled gently at him. Pulling the towel off his head you pulled him against you “I love you too”

-        Laughing you pulled him to lay beside you before leaning over him to reach across the bed and turn off the bedside lamp

-        With on last kiss on his nose you bid him goodnight computer game forgotten in haze of showers and cuddles (amongst other activities)

Saeyoung

-        He knows what you’re up to.

-        But you’re wearing the cute cat pajamas he had bought you.

-        and you had completely designed your bed time routine around tempting him to bed

-        he had never even heard of bedtime yoga before you moved in

-        yet there you where contorted beside the bed showing of how flexible you could be and occasionally smirking into the camera you knew he was watching

-        so it wasn’t long before he found himself making his way to the bedroom

-        “ready for bed secret agent man?” you quipped and couldn’t help a smirk as you saw his face tint a slight pink

-        “are you kitten me?” he shot back and you had to cover your moth to stop the giggles

-        “come on I’ve even got my paw-jamas on” you manage through your giggles

-        “you’re doing this on purr-pose aren’t you?”

-        “guess the cats out of the bag how’d you know?”

-        “just a feline” both of your where lost in a fit of laughter at that point

-        you pulled him to the bed and made note of the dark circles under his eyes as you pulled a heavy weighted blanket over you both before snuggling up next to him

-        he had insisted he didn’t need it. “I don’t have anxiety, MC” he had said.

-        Next day shipping and an extra good night of sleep later he admitted the weight was comforting

-        Your rans your fingers through his hair and mumbled quietly to him about your day.

-        You had found that the quiet talk down helped him relax as he curled into your chest

-        This was the only time you ever saw him this small

-        Wondered if it was a product of his childhood that he disliked sleeping so much

-        Still you held him close and played with his hair absently as you recounted the story of meeting a stray cat on the way home

-        After a while you ran out of stories and moved on to trying new jokes searching for the ones that drew sleepy chuckles from his lips

-        Lulling him to sleep was simple enough. The hard part came after

-        Falling asleep without waking him up was always a struggle

-        He was a notoriously light sleeper

-        One wrong move or strange noise had him jolting upright and alert

-        Once you had startled him awake with nothing more than a yawn

-        Perhaps it was his training that had him on such high alert.

-        You hoped that slowly but surely he would learn to relax a bit more but you understood it could take years if it happened at all

Zen

-        He knows he should sleep

-        He just can’t some times

-        He’ll lie awake for hours if you don’t help him relax

-        On these nights you two have settled into a routine

-        You make him tea and brush his hair

-        “you know you don’t have to do that jagiya”

-        “I enjoy it your hair is always so soft!”

-        “are you jealous?”

-        “I would be if you weren’t my boyfriend. That’s the thing though your MY boyfriend meaning technically your mine and by extension your hair is mine”

-        “is that how it works?”

-        You lean down and kiss the top of his head

-        “yep that’s how it works”

-        “does that mean your mine too”

-        “always and forever”

-        “your so cute jagi!

-        After tea you both go through your nightly routines washing your face and getting ready for bed

-        On good night you share a bath

-        You lean against his chest and lay your head back on his shoulders while you both do a face mask

-        in bed you ask him to sing you a lullaby as you gently trace patterns into his chest

-        You hum along contentedly and smile when he yawns

-        After while his singing drifts off and you can hear his breath get deeper

-        he can sleep through quite a bit but you know that the second you pull away from him he’ll be up in a second looking for the warmth and weight of you

-        so you pull the blankets tighter around the both of you and slip into sleep yourself

Jaehee

-        you got to start early with Jaehee

-        no caffeine after noon or it’s a lost cause

-        after opening the café this got 1000% harder

-        you lure her away from work by offering to watch a Zen DVD with her

-        you pull her against you on the couch and hum along with the music quietly (she hates it if you sing along but humming is fine)

-        slowly she starts to relax against your chest and you know it’s time to move upstairs (wink wink. Wait no. you both need rest save the winks for next time)

-        “Jaehee?” you ask gently “how bout we head to bed? We have to open early tomorrow”

-        She yawns bit but you can see the defiance in her eye’s

-        “I should finish a couple more things before”

-        “no” you say sternly pulling her toward the bedroom

-        “but there’s still paperwork”

-        “and it will still be there in the morning. Look ill work the morning by myself so you can take care of it then but you need sleep”

-        She sighs but fallows you none the less

-        “your right MC.”

-        “it happens sometimes” you laugh winking at her and reveling in her averted eye’s and blushing cheeks

-        (wink wink? No just one wink. You still need rest)

-        Once in bed you snuggle together and just before drifting off you hear her mumble

-        “I’m so glad we’re friend” “I’m so lucky to have you”

you said you wanted jumin fluff so i have a headcanon that jumins hair is very very soft. and fluffy

omg!! yes. he def has the best shampoo and conditioner so his hair would be sooooo soft and fluffy

oh imagine MC teasing him by fluffing up his hair when he gets home or how soft it is when he lays his head in her lap and she runs her fingers through it gently

and it being all fluffy and messy from towel drying it after a shower and he looks all serious under all his fluff

thank you that really brightened my day and gave me some good ideas!!

Just a boy who wants to live a normal life!

https://www.webtoons.com/en/challenge/between-worlds/list?title_no=199399