I keep my Tumblr url a secret from my friends when sharing my works so they can't find my blog unless they see one of my poems in the wild. It's like a scavenger hunt.
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Context: The Party Is At A Dwarven Consulate Type Place With A Mysterious Egg They Found Underground.
Context: The Party is at a dwarven consulate type place with a mysterious egg they found underground. They've been told to hide it or get rid of it or do whatever they can to get it out of that place...
DM: Uh, who has the egg again?
Me: I think Agaricus does.
DM: Perfect! *goes into a long description of the egg suddenly hatching into a 90-foot tall dragon-esque creature with chains and flesh for scales called The Stonecrusher. It kills many people and tears the place apart.* So what are y'all going to do?
Me: I want to calm it! (I'm an Elf Rogue, btw)
DM: Are you sure? This thing is MASSIVE!
Me: I want to pet the big puppy!
DM: Roll for Animal Handling.
Me: *rolls a 16*
DM: Roll 2 more for me, please
Me: *rolls a 21 and a 14* I-is that good?
DM: Roll a single survival check with advantage
Me: *rolls a 3 and a 15* I shall take the 15!
DM: *rolls a d100 and gets a 14* I don't believe this.
Me: I MADE A NEW FRIEND?!
DM: You only had a 15% chance of this working, and I rolled a 14. You needed above a 14 on all 3 checks to even get that far. You wanted to try and calm it down, and you succeeded. However, taming it is a whole other thing, and if you somehow manage to do THAT, I'm calling the game won at that point. If you roll a nat 20 then it will be your pet.
Me: *rolls a 19* NO! I'M GONNA CRY!
DM: I would have cried if you got it.
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More Posts from Perfection-is-an-opinion
~Your attention to me is like the sun in July. Blinding, constant, and unwanted. It'd be a shame if I were to rain on your parade.~
-a poem of a new kind