Manic Thoughts Fo Tonight:

Manic thoughts fo tonight:

-The world is mine and I can do whatever I want

-I hate you guys you just ruin my fun by getting all worried

-I SWEAR the trees are speaking to me amidst this midnight walk

-Why is everyone trying to kill me

-I’m so under-desired for a person who’s completely superior

-I’m going to break the world record for smartest person alive, just let me get my textbooks

-I’m going to spend my money on crack, clothes, and coffee

-My manic anthem playlist is on full fuckinf blast and I don’t want to turn it down

-My heartbeat is rocking me back and forth very very notably which is entertaining

-Speaking of entertainment OH MY GOD THINGS ARE FUNNY

-Why are all my friends asleep :( FAKE* friends

-I want to s/h because it is fun and so damn enlivening :-)))))

BIPOLAR

I would like to speak,

But my voice lacks volume,

But my skin has no perfume.

Sometimes I think that I’m weak,

But I’m just on the peak.

And when everything is over,

My soul has no power.

when I open my eyes,

I see all my lies,

Last night I lost my lover.

thanks to my doctor I now have to ask myself

am I faking the mania? is it just stress? am i really vibrating or just hallucinating that i am? i am really hallucinating or am I hallucinating that I’m hallucinating? am i just hypomanic with delusions? am i just making everything up?

or am I actually manic and it’s just that no one believes me?

Sometimes just the sight of my scars or the act of taking my medication makes me feel so fucking sad

My friends really have that “go be sad somewhere else” vibe

I need to be (hypo)manic. 

I need the buzz

I need the escape

I need it now.