Actuallybipolar - Tumblr Posts

Yo !! What if I made a Linkedin account but used it as a Tumblr blog ?

Would that be cool or what ?

I don’t need a TV series, I have my own episodes😎

Me to me when I quit my medications to trigger (hypo)mania, but get depression instead

ppllleeasssee pay attention to me give me notesssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss

Hypo/manic moods fo today: -My humor is too advanced for people -*Clogs up the browser’s history with compulsive researching* -Hmm I should have a garage sale -*Makes a catfish account on instagram for no reason* -I would be such a good drummer -*Spam texts people I shouldn’t be talking to*  -Getting a septum piercing is a great idea -*Masturbates for 2/3 of the day* -I need cocaine -*Annoys friends with fixations* -I don’t even need medicine -*Excessive sweating, heart palpitations, and body tremors* -Have I always been this attractive? -*Thoughts at the speed of light* -Sleep is for the weak and I am not weak -*Laughs and smiles so hard that cheeks and jaw start to hurt* -I will replace Vsauce

My mind has found its sense

Step outside your charcoal eyes and fall for lust

For the only torture of this life is the slow burn of time

Would they still call it disease

If they saw what you’ve learned?

Stop to see the thermions

Flying right out of your baking body

Watching the hot flares disgorge from your tingling skin

Would they still call it pain

If they knew how alive I am?

This is a real light, not new pain

Danger and impact are but ideas

So let your conscience fail

Do you understand now?

I can fly I can fly I can fly also I don’t wanna sleep fuck you

I hate that I’m mentally ill enough to be hospitalized for life when I’m off my meds. I hate that I’m always so tempted to get off them despite this awareness

Manic fixation of the day: punching everything

Being bipolar be like *triggers manic episode* *accused of faking* *surfeit of withdrawal symptoms when skipping meds* *feeling humiliated in the aftermath of all the stupid shit you’ve done in public* *sleeping for 15+ hours straight when depressed* *threats from everyone to be hospitalized*

In my tragic heart, there’s nothing more disgusting than this depression

You know you’re coming into psychosis when everything is contradicted. Nothing affects or shocks you anymore. You’re numb but everything scares you. You’re too exhausted to show any emotion but too vigilant to not do anything about your paranoid delusions. You start to isolate yourself but keep hoping someone will reach out so you won’t be alone with your thoughts. You feel helpless but so prepared and aware of unseen truths. As verbal communication becomes more difficult, you have made sense of what you’re saying but no one else gets it. You need to keep quiet and not endanger yourself, but you end up talking about it anyway. It’s hot outside but you wear clothes for cold weather. You understand that your delusions are just delusions, but you’re not making it up and it is the only real thing to you. There are sometimes things you feel, see, hear, smell, taste, that aren’t really there. You refuse to eat because of your paranoia but you can’t resist. Us psychotics are seen as dangerous, but we are the sufferers of absence. I don’t want to hurt you, I just want to be left alone, I’m just scared.

IF THIS DOESN’T ACCURATELY CAPTURE THE EUPHORIC PARTS OF MANIA I DON’T KNOW WHAT DOES

Wow being manic during quarantine is sure something else

My friends really have that “go be sad somewhere else” vibe

Manic thoughts fo tonight:

-The world is mine and I can do whatever I want

-I hate you guys you just ruin my fun by getting all worried

-I SWEAR the trees are speaking to me amidst this midnight walk

-Why is everyone trying to kill me

-I’m so under-desired for a person who’s completely superior

-I’m going to break the world record for smartest person alive, just let me get my textbooks

-I’m going to spend my money on crack, clothes, and coffee

-My manic anthem playlist is on full fuckinf blast and I don’t want to turn it down

-My heartbeat is rocking me back and forth very very notably which is entertaining

-Speaking of entertainment OH MY GOD THINGS ARE FUNNY

-Why are all my friends asleep :( FAKE* friends

-I want to s/h because it is fun and so damn enlivening :-)))))

*manic episode* yep this is what caffeine does to a mf

Any tumblr posts about depression or something sad are a fucking joke to me when I’m manic. It makes me feel like an asshole but I mean no offense in that thought, I just don’t have the time to mope, I have to get things done

I don’t know if this is Bipolar Culture or not, but I hate when I get so hyper and have the instinct of calling it mania or the start of an episode, and then see it was just false alarm. A manic scare™

I am so manic that I can’t even make it relatable