AUBERGINE - Tumblr Posts
Silly Stories - Dead Cow
The most recent session of my university game of Pathfinder went through a rather peculiar adventure / side-quest this Sunday gone-by.
This post is a one-off sorta thing.
Unfortunately, this story contains some degree of regrettable animal-violence.
The party, around level 3, were informed that there was a issue occurring at a local dairy farm. One of the cows had died of natural causes a few nights back, peaceful as could have been. Two days ago, the farmer went to remove the cow’s corpse but the cow refused and began to insult him. The corpse seemed to be alive and walked around as well as any other would.
This is all of the information that I had prepared for this, as I forgot the adventure existed when I gave them the list of notice-board jobs. I had forgotten to flesh-out the adventure to any degree as it was at the bottom of my list. This meant that (if they chose to follow it) I had to ad-lib practically everything from the foundations on up.
Well.
What followed was an entirely made-up non-combat encounter which left several players asking: ‘How high/drunk were you when you wrote this?’
Essentially, imagine a horror-movie villain - all twitchy, sporadic, and unnatural in their mannerisms; twisting their head like an owl, vomiting on the floor, etc - but as a rotting cow carcass inhabited by an insane fairy-creature with a penchant for interpretive poetry or the ... insane variety.
The fairy refused to leave the herd alone, explaining that they like being a cow and will remain as such. However, they would gladly evacuate the cow’s corpse if the party bring it, specifically, a grey house cat. The party know that there is only one such cat in the entire town, and it belongs to the Baron himself.
Half the party want to kill the cat, the other half don’t ... because ‘cat’.
Eventually the cat is captured, petted, and the petter is sent to sleep via quick spell. One of the party saw his opportunity to kill the cat and fired ... and shot an ally through the hip with a crossbow bolt. Even worse, the cat couldn’t escape the half-orc petter’s grasp and was killed immediately when she fell face-first onto it.
The Baron found this hilarious.
The party squabbled, pointed blame, and, eventually - regrettably - brought the now 2D house cat to the cow-thing (who named itself Aubergine) and allowed him to leave his cow-form. He happily undertook his new cat host, leaving the old one to explode into a shower of putrid gore.
He thanked the party with a single, enchanted ring which allowed its wearer to, once a day, vomit out a 30 ft stream of viscous fluid, nauseating all who are struck by it for a short while.
The farmers paid the party 50 gold for the help.
Apparently it was the best part of the night, and that makes me happy.
A courgette is just the bastard child of and aubergine and a cucumber
Loft-Style Bedroom San Francisco
a medium-sized bedroom with white walls and a gray floor in a country loft style.
🇮🇹 Golosoni e golosone volete preparare per questo fine settimana un piatto da leccarsi i baffi? Bene, vi do io la ricetta giusta! 😉🤤 Se cliccate sul link qui sotto, potrete leggere come preparare degli appetitosi pomodori ripieni di riso, salsiccia e formaggi. 😍 Vi ho fatto venire l’acquolina in bocca? Spero proprio di si! 🤞🏼😉 Buon weekend amici!😉
🇬🇧 Do you want to prepare a mouth-watering dish for the weekend? Well, I'll give you the right recipe! 😉🤤 If you click on the link below, you will be able to read how to prepare some appetizing stuffed tomatoes with rice, sausage and cheeses. 😍 Did I make you hungry? I really hope so! 🤞🏼😉 Good weekend everyone ! ☺️
🇬🇧 My dear friends I want to show you a delicious first course! I've prepared aubergine tortelli with Grana Padano fondue.😋 You can decorate the dish with some tomato powder and herbs. What about it? Do you like my recipe?😉 I hope so! Click on the link below to read my recipe😊
🇮🇹 Miei cari amici ecco il piatto finito che vede come protagonisti i tortelli di melanzane! La salsa si accompagnamento non è altro che una fonduta di Grana Padano. Decorate poi con polvere di pomodoro ed erbette et voilà il pranzo è servito!😉 Cliccate sul link per leggere la mia ricetta😉
🇮🇹 Stanchi del solito piatto di pasta a pranzo? Allora una bella quiche é quel che fa per voi! Una torta salata realizzata con pasta brisée fatta in casa.😍🎊 Preparate poi un ripieno con ortaggi di stagione e vedrete che risultato!!😋😋 Per leggere la ricetta cliccate sul link😉
🇬🇧 Are you tired of the usually lunch? Then I've got a suggestion for you! Prepare a delicious quiche with summer vegetables. You'll go crazy for it!😍
