Batfam - Tumblr Posts - Page 2
Bruce Wayne wakes up in the past, five months after Jason Todd died, and spends most days sat beside the grave because he never found out exactly when Jason had come back and he wanted to be there to save him when he did.
From an outside perspective, everyone is extremely concerned.
Headcanon that Bruce’s kids have all pulled the ‘you're not my father card’ at some point or the other and by the time steph rolled around he didn't even take it seriously
Of course, the first time dick said it, bruce cried himself to sleep. But by the eighteenth time, he was numb to it. “Dickie just eat your peas.”
The first time jason did it Bruce pulled him aside and said “i know Im not, but that doesn't mean i don't care for you jason.” by the twenty fifth time he just held up the adoption papers
The first time Tim said it Bruce laughed. “Tim, you literally forced me to adopt you. Yes I am your father.” Tim didn't bother to say it from then on, maybe muttering ‘you're not my dad!’ under his breath at the computer, just for bruce to whisper ominously ‘yes i am.’
When Steph said it, full of anger and hate and sadness and fear, bruce just followed her and said “you're right. Im not your father. And i will never be your father. But, if you'll let me, id like to be better.” After that any time steph said ‘ur not my father’ bruce would just respond with ‘never will be’
Cass said “your are my father” and left no room for argument
Babs said “ur not my dad or my father or even close to being any of it, but you are my mom.” bruce just had to accept that
When damian said it bruce just stood there for a solid fifteen minutes rebooting. Dick and jason fell out of their chairs laughing.
Duke specifically went “ur my dad! My dad! Boogie woogie woogie!’ and bruce was just like ‘bet aight.”
posting from my school fucking bathroom because the thought of Bruce in this billionaire persona after Jason comes back re-introducing him to the press is too hilarious not to comment on
Bruce, Playboy, Air head, Loving father, billionaire: This is my baby son :D
Jason, shit Ton of scars, built like a house, his muscles have muscles: Sup
Shazam identity reveal AU where the league knew Captain Marvel was a child named Billy since day one but he stubbornly refuses to transform or tell his full name for the whole 4 years he’s been on the team and everyone’s so confused because they know like. 95% of his identity already why is he hiding this specific part?
They start thinking he’s some kind of criminal or had a dark past he’s hiding from them. They know so much about him, though. They know he’s homeless, they know he’s had bad foster homes, they know his parents died tragically and his uncle stole his inheritance. he shares everything. Everything except the one thing that would show he truly trusts them. Why? What have they done to convince him they weren’t trustworthy?
Then. He accidentally transforms back during a battle. Batman instantly scans his face with the facial scanner that’s built into his mask because he’s paranoid as hell of course he has one of those. And he sees exactly why he hid it for so long.
The tension in the air is so palpable that the entire league feels it and they look back and forth between them waiting for the bomb to drop.
Cyborg is the one who blurts it out (he IS a facial scanner)
“Your last name is BAT SON??”
Billy groans into his hands in defeat and Batman sighs, finally understanding why the secret was kept so desperately.
From then on the league refuses to call Billy anything other than Big Red Robin or just Big Robin. Robin but big. they call Batman Captain Dad at every possible opportunity. Whenever Billy does something wrong someone threatens to tell his dad on him then call Batman. The robins last names may as well not exist because from then on they are only ever called Damian Bat-son or Red Hood Bat-son or Stephanie Bat-daughter, except for Red Robin who’s called Little Red Robin or, if they’re feeling brave, the Little Red Cheese. The bat children and Billy’s nicknames become so confusing and meshed together that conversations get very confusing and the names just become interchangeable. The press is convinced that Captain Marvel is Batman’s secret love child within a week.
It gets so chaotic so fast, no one knows how this happened but names mean nothing anymore and Batman is getting a DNA test. So much opportunity for chaos!
Headcanon that Bruce’s kids have all pulled the ‘you're not my father card’ at some point or the other and by the time steph rolled around he didn't even take it seriously
Of course, the first time dick said it, bruce cried himself to sleep. But by the eighteenth time, he was numb to it. “Dickie just eat your peas.”
The first time jason did it Bruce pulled him aside and said “i know Im not, but that doesn't mean i don't care for you jason.” by the twenty fifth time he just held up the adoption papers
The first time Tim said it Bruce laughed. “Tim, you literally forced me to adopt you. Yes I am your father.” Tim didn't bother to say it from then on, maybe muttering ‘you're not my dad!’ under his breath at the computer, just for bruce to whisper ominously ‘yes i am.’
When Steph said it, full of anger and hate and sadness and fear, bruce just followed her and said “you're right. Im not your father. And i will never be your father. But, if you'll let me, id like to be better.” After that any time steph said ‘ur not my father’ bruce would just respond with ‘never will be’
Cass said “your are my father” and left no room for argument
Babs said “ur not my dad or my father or even close to being any of it, but you are my mom.” bruce just had to accept that
When damian said it bruce just stood there for a solid fifteen minutes rebooting. Dick and jason fell out of their chairs laughing.
Duke specifically went “ur my dad! My dad! Boogie woogie woogie!’ and bruce was just like ‘bet aight.”
i have this head cannon that Bruce has a wall in his study dedicated to bad pictures of his kids. like, the exact moment when jason got sprayed by the hose? framed and hung. tim slipping and dropping pudding on his head? up there. dick falling from a chandelier? his open mouthed scream is the first picture up there. he has bad hair days from steph, failed pranks from dick, mid spin photos of cass, half asleep pictures of babs, everyone is up there. And then Damian comes and he sees the wall and he must be up there. But Damian is an absolute unit behind a camera, he does not have a single bad picture. ever. After an intense waterballoon fight they take a group picture and everyone is soaked and miserable and laughing but Damian is glowing, his hair swept away by the water just so and it infuriates him.
My favorite thing about the bats is that… they are gothamites. And sure they scare the shit out of people… but they are in Gotham. Superman is loved by his people, Flash is adored, people pray to Wonder Woman, Green Arrow is feared. But the Bats? The Bats are like all of Gotham's weird older brothers/sisters/parents. Superman and Green Lantern are visiting Batman in Gotham and all of a sudden he gets smacked in the face by a banana and they turn and find a group of teens skateboarding away and one kid calls over his shoulder ‘eat the fucking potassium you absolute brick.’ and Batman doesn't even do anything. Barry is chilling with Nightwing when a girl runs beneath the building they are sitting on and screams “Nice ass Night! But get it the fuck down here, my cats stuck in a tree.” And Nightwing does a flip off the building and just?? helps her?? Wonder Woman and Black Canary are passing through Crime Alley on their way to the Batcave and spot Red Hood standing in an alley, being lectured by a woman who is half his size and she ends the lecture by throwing two sandwiches at his face and walking away. Red Hood just takes his hood off and starts eating. Superboy is helping Red Robin defeat Scarecrow and while they’re hiding, waiting for him to walk into their trap, RR is casually conversing with a Gothamite about Hogwarts Houses, and when he says the Gothamite looks like a Gryfindor he pops his head out and screams “Yo scarecrow hes right fucking here!” J’onn is heading to the Manor to discuss League business with Bruce when he spots Robin(Damian) fighting Riddler all alone and is about to intervene when three teenagers show up and just fucking deck him instead. Damian doesn't thank them, just glowers, and one of the guys goes “you're welcome you fucking brat.” And the girl even smacks the back of his head and goes “manners.” Clark is sent to go find Tim and Steph and Damian and finds them at this girls birthday party, in full costume, eating cupcakes and drinking punch, jumping on the bouncy house and is like “errr, B-Batman needs you home.” And as one the entire birthday party group went “Fuck Batman.” Spoiler was spotted painting these guys nails, Black Bat was seen teaching calculus to a group of teenagers, Batgirl(Babs) was running after a group of kids screaming “Give me back my laptop you fucks!” Just- just the batfamily and Gothamites being annoying to each other and appreciative yet bitches.
Bus driver: stop getting thrown at my fucking bus, i got places to be and my insurance only covers so many shatter windshields and person sized dents Batman: I don't really control where I get thrown Bus Driver: well you better fucking start otherwise theres gonna be another fucking villain on these streets *drives away and almost runs him over* Superman: *gaping* yo-you're just gonna let him do that? Batman: *shrugs* Gotham insurance aint what its cracked up to be Superman: *staring dumbly*
#Dick would absolutely wrestle Damian into this #AFTER embarrassing all of his brothers #By wearing the adult size enthusiastically #In public, no less
a shitpost for @audreycritter because she sent me this and asked if I could draw Damian in it
What A Steal | Guardian | Playmate?
—
It’s Gotham, right. It’s hard, it’s unforgiving, it’s constantly warring for its soul between the Bat, the Rogues and political/capitalist monsters. They’ve survived big bads with bombs and bio-chemical weapons, constant terrorism, alien invasions, unfeeling corrupt officials, THE earthquake—Gothamites are wild. And they come together more often than not, protecting their own while the world outside turn fearful and judgemental eyes on their dark spires and unending rain. They put their trust in a prolific monster that puts himself between them and everything else because no one else will ever love them as much as he and his team does.
I think a lot about art that comes out of Gotham. The kind of affluent pretentious crap that gets bought by Mayor Hill or tycoons from Metropolis. The small popular studios that have small but powerful exhibitions of little known artists that reflect light and life in the corners of their city.
And I think about the graffiti. The illegal tagging, defacement of the Bowery stretching from corner to corner, the paint-covered walls of Crime Alley where the brick can barely be seen anymore. I think about the kind of artist Gotham would grow in that medium.
Not Banksy. Banksy adjacent, maybe.
Someone who’s survived the worst of Gotham and loves the concrete under their feet. Someone so removed from all the Waynes and the Vreelands and the Hills of the City; someone who grew up in the shadows of gargoyled buildings and in the arms of people who work to keep the city alive. Silent, anonymous, as enigmatic as Gotham’s protector. Plastering their opinions all over Gotham’s First National and beneath bridges between the islands. And I think there’s more than one. A small handful, never planning, never speaking, but passing quietly in the night with cans of spray paint and ladders.
The GCPD get calls about them from time to time, and their latest illegal work marring buildings in uptown. But it’s Gotham. Gordon and the Bat have bigger things to worry about with little time to spare. When it comes between an armed robbery or a tagger, one of these things is not like the other.
But I do think the Bat looks. Every so often, he’ll turn in an alley or a subway, and there it’ll be. And he’ll stand, for a breath of contemplation, and then he’ll disappear back into the night.
Do the bat's know about the All-Blades? Cuz if not, Jason has an opportunity to do the funniest thing
Commission info / ko-fi
all the bat kids just start calling Babs ‘Chat’ whenever she’s Oracle over the comms
The joker: *evil monologue*
Damian, in the most bored voice: Chat is this real?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Dick: *pulls off an insane flip-hit-the-bad-guy-summersault combo*
Dick: CHAT CLIP THAT!!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Jason, distracted by goons: opps on these guys chat?
I fucking love this, like how can you not!?
I really like the idea of Damian having a ranking list of his sibling that goes from Number One Sibling™ to Tim. The benefits of being the Number One Sibling™ include but are not limited to: allowed physical affection, almost no life threats, being called by name in a non-mockying way, being the player one on video games and gifted drawings.
And one would think the first position is always reserved for Dick and yeah, it usually is, but then Dick would do something like refusing to take Damian on patrol with him for a dangerous mission or even just scolding him in a way Damian doesn’t like at all, and then Jason becomes the Number One Sibling™, because he’s the coolest brother anyway (not that Damian would ever admit it) and he doesn’t belittle Damian. Then Cass comes along and she teaches Damian a new combat move and now she’s the number one, sorry Jay, but that doesn’t sit right with Stephanie because “I love you Cass, but I’m totally the best big sis in this family”. So she’d do something ridiculous like convincing Damian to play a prank on Bruce and Damian would accept only on the condition that she’d take the blame if didn’t work, but then it does work, and outsmarting the Batman is always a big win for a Robin, so there you go, Stephanie wins the best sibling contest, everyone out. And so on and so on.
In all of this a) they all know very well what they’re doing, of course, and being the Number One Sibling™ becomes kinda of a challenge between them and b) Tim is obviously excluded because let’s be honest, he’s never gonna win and he’s not even interested in winning at all.
But then one day they make the mistake to discuss the matter out loud in the cave where Damian can catch them. And of course, Damian catches them. And he doesn’t like the idea of them knowing about his ranking list at all (he thought he was being very sneaky about it) and much less the fact that they’re actually discussing strategies on how to win his sympathy like this was a game, and how dare they.
So he’s forced to do something he doesn’t like at all, but that’s necessary anyway.
He looks at all of them dead in the eyes and goes like:
“You’re all demoted to Drake’s position. And Tim is my new favorite sibling.”
And they all gasp - especially Tim who was sitting at the batcomputer minding his own business and wanted nothing to do with this whole thing in the first place - because Damian’s called him TIM and oh my god. Also they all think he’s kidding around but no, Damian does not kid around, doesn’t even know the meaning of the expression, so in the following days Tim finds himself in the strange position where he’s the only one Damian doesn’t insult or threat with physical body harm, and in the beginning he’s like ???? but then he kinda enjoys it and underneath it all he’s a vindictive little shit too, so he starts doing things like ruffling Damian’s hair or cuddling with the kid on the couch while they watch a movie and the rest of the family is so freaked out (especially Dick who now gets a dagger to his throat every times he tries to hug Damian) it’s almost too funny to keep doing it. (But they both keep doing it anyway, of course.)
And Bruce, in all of this, is so, so, so proud of his two youngest sons. Vengeful brotherly bonding was not exactly what he’d hoped to happen for Tim and Damian to get closer but eh, at this point he’ll take whatever it works.
AU List
Hello! Welcome! This is my attempt at keeping the AU's boiuncing around in my head in order. They should be mostly in chronological order.
Some of them are getting turned into full length fics! The list (and it's open to suggestions) can be found here: Fic List
A couple of things:
Please feel free to write your own fics based on any of these! No need to ask, simply link it so I can also read it <3
If you have any specific scenarios you have an idea for and would like me to write- my asks/prompts are always open! I can't guarantee quality as I do most of my writing at like, 3 AM but I'll try my best!
I don't condone racism, bigotry, homophobia, etc.. I do not welcome it here. I acknowledge that I have biases that I've yet to unlearn. If there's something that makes you feel unwelcome in the things I write, please let me know and I will fix it ASAP.
I write these mostly on little to no sleep (that’s when I get creative I guess?) so good luck.
Squatter! Danny Raises Tim AU:
[Here] In which Tim finds a squatter (Danny) in his house and gets a brother.
[Here] AU of Squatter!Danny where Tim finds Danny squatting in the Nest as Red Robin and thinks he's a coffee-fueled hallucination.
[Here] Tim and Danny stalks the Dynamic Duo and freaks them out.
[Here] Tim and Danny goes shopping, Jazz Fenton casually suggests murder as a means of sibling adoption.
[Here] Tim meets Jason! Robin and fanboys his way into thinking he could become Robin. Danny tries to temper Tim’s stalking habits.
[Here] Family Bonding
Ghost King and the Justice League:
[Here] The JLA summons Danny and Constantine regrets his poor life decisions.
[Here] Writing Prompt: Ghost King!Danny can hear the screams of the Joker's victims.
[Here] Batman tells Hal Jordan to babysit the unconscious Ghost King because Hal’s neon green.
[Here] Zatanna helps the dying ghost boy by repairing his grave and hunting down the GIW
[Here] Zatanna retrieves the gravestones of Phantom's subjects and gives him a safe space to grieve.
[Here] Ghost King!Danny babysits Wonder Woman at the behest of the Goddess Hera.
[Here] Ghost King!Danny munches on some demons.
[Here] Local space ghost scolds superhero club because they littered in space.
[Here] The OG Young Justice team summons Danny in a private school bathroom
[Here] The JLA failed to prevent cultists from summoning the ghost king. Luckily, they get Danny instead, who seems to be the king's assistant.
Alcoholic! Danny Adopts Jason Todd AU: (Fic)
[Here] Alcoholic!Danny saves Jason Todd from a mugger and gives up alcohol to be a big brother.
[Here] Alcoholic! Danny confronts his stalker, buys chili dogs for his new little brother, and kills a pedo in that order.
[Here] Going Sober!Danny meets Batman, and then gives his new little brother an apartment and tells him he can go to school.
[Here] Going Sober! Danny takes his little brother back to school shopping
Spider in Gotham AU: (Fic)
[Here] In which Peter Parker gets isekai'd and shrunk, commits crime, and adopts a Gothamite street kid for a brother.
[Here] In which Peter Parker’s alternate memories haunt him in the form of nightmares, his identity gets made by his roommate, and he talks to a concerned vigilante with poor sleeping habits about his own poor sleeping habits.
Gotham! Danny and His Bats:
[Here] Writing Prompt: Cryptid Danny predates the Bats.
[Here] In which Danny is both Tim Drake and Gotham's City Spirit.
[Here] Writing Prompt: Danny and Gotham’s Bay that’s full of dead bodies, ghosts, and a very alive Red Hood
[Here] Gotham Spirit Phantom has a moment of introspection and would like people to stop blowing parts of the city up
[Here] AU of Gotham Spirit Phantom where Danny has no idea what universe he got reborn in and proceeds to have a bad time and decides to DIY mental health.
[Here] AU of Gotham Spirit Phantom where Danny has no idea what universe he got reborn in, pt. 2: Danny bullies Bruce into self care.
[Here] Writing Prompt: Shade! Jason stumbles across a ghost Danny, adopts him, gets turned into a full-fledged ghost, eats cookies, and gets pulled back into his human body.
Danny in Gotham:
[Here] Accidental Crime Lord! Danny Phantom and his takeover ft. a gaggle of orphans and a stressed Batman
[Here] Writing Prompt Lawyer!Danny Fenton and heroism within the confines of the law
[Here] Coffee Shop Owner! Danny enforces the shop's neutrality by beating up the Joker with a chair and accidentally seduces the Red Hood.
[Here] New to the City! Danny dropkicks Red Hood in his stupid red helmet
[Here] Danny vs. Mr. Muffins
[Here] In which Bruce, Alfred, and Dick grieves while Danny wonders why they were grieving on an empty grave.
Sea Cryptic! Danny AU:
[Here] Sea Cryptic! Danny cleans up beach after local vigilante explodes his plane over the ocean.
[Here] Sea Cryptic! Danny cleans the Gotham bay and does broke college student things.
[Here] Sea Cryptic! Danny extorts money from Batman for blankets.
[Here] Sea Cryptic! Danny makes a friend and calls Red Robin broke.
[Here] Sea Cryptic! Danny makes Batman a debtor and makes friends with the best vigilante recyclers in Gotham.
Danny Gets Yeeted (Yoted?) Into Gotham AU:
[Here] Danny gets dropped on the Batmobile and acquires minions
[Here] IOU One (1) Big (Harvey) Dent
[Here] Danny trolls the Waynes by telling them he's died before (and pretending he doesn't know they're vigilantes).
[Here] Tim makes bad excuses for vigilante injuries and Danny forgets about the knife embedded in his stomach.
[Here] Sleepy, assassin-trained Damian accidentally stabs civilian Danny and feels bad about it.
[Here] Danny's Knife Collection (but not just knives).
[Here] Ghostbusters but they don't actually catch the ghost (Danny)
[Here] Danny’s in the goddamn walls!
[Here] Danny's first family game night: trauma, eating paint, and aiming the Bat cannon at the GCPD and firing feral vigilantes out of it.
[Here] Cassandra Cain (former Feral Child) reassures Danny (who is Ghost Feral) that they're siblings.
[Here] Danny gets ice-cream with Duke, Bruce vs. (corrupt) CPS
[Here] Danny does gardening with Alfred
Danielle "Dani"/"Ellie" Phantom:
[Here] "Ellie" visits Gotham and encounters a Stinky Red Hood.
[Here] "Dani" trades "removing corrupted ectoplasm" for "a meeting with Batman about the GIW" ft. Stinky Red Hood and a confused Nightwing.
[Here] A paralegal gets reincarnated/isekai’ed as Danielle “Nellie” Phantom, Prompt
Gremlin Genius! Timothy Drake:
[Here] Toddler! Tim is irritated at his heroes for showing up late at their own Gala.
[Here] Tower Scene AU
Reincarnated as Gamer! Timmy Drake (fem Tim): (Fic)
[Here] The Dissociative Experience™️ of realizing your afterlife is a cosmic oopsie (and that you’re now playing a game as a female Tim Drake).
[Here] Art for the fic
New Tim-line, Who Dis? AU:
[Here] Time Traveling! Tim has a crisis on a plane and hires Deathstroke to off the Joker.
[Here] Time Traveling! Tim takes over Bludhaven's underground at nine years old by terrorizing them and takes out his big brother's enemies via blackmail and Amanda Waller.
[Here] Tim Drake Vs. The Education System round 2
[Here] Dick Grayson remembering his dumbass, self-sacrificing little brother from a different Tim-line.
Prompts Found:
[Here] Tim is a sleeping cat and the law is: you can't move.
[Here] Heartbroken Danny leaves Dick Grayson with a table full of cold anniversary dinner.
[Here] Tim beefs with Superman.
[Here] Triplet Tim
[Here] Triplet Tim Pt. 2
[Here] Triplet Tim Pt. 3
[Here] Triplet Tim Pt. 4
[Here] The Trio escapes Amity via train
Thoughts about DC/DP:
[Here] Richard Grayson's successful image change
[Here] DC vs. The Fan Ability of Saying "No"
[Here] Jason's Pit Madness
[Here] Gotham's City Planners
[Here] Jason and Cass discusses their kill/no kill policies and comes to an understanding about each other.
[Here] Danny can be a twink OR he could be buff as hell.
[Here] DC Canon is soup.
[Here] Damian's relationship with art throughout his short life.
[Here] Ra’s could have revolutionized the medical field but decided to be a creep and clone a minor
[Here] Tim Drake is that troll from Trolls the movies, Branch
[Here] Butter Sock
[Here] Gotham city’s unanimous agreement not to fish dead bodies out of the bay
[Here] Danny in Hogwarts.
[Here] Reincarnation Manhwa + the Bats
[Here] The Bats, Supernatural AU
[Here] Jason's sick fic
[Here] Damian is lost in Amity Park
*3 minutes later*
Tim: See, Dick I told you I wasn't gonna die. [Takes a sip of energy drink]
Tim finally having a heart attack: fuck
Tim: *dies*
Damian, pulling out a knife to harvest Tim's organs Dwight Shrute style: Better not let these go to waste.
Dick hyperventilating while staring at the cookies: WHAT THE HELL ARE THOSE COOKIES MADE OF????
Damian, reading his fortune cookie: "You will commit a crime in three minutes."
Tim: That's pretty direct, right?
Damian, to Dick: What does yours say?
Dick: Mine says, "You will witness a crime in three minutes."
Damian: Drake, what does yours say?
Tim: "You will die in three minutes."