Bucky Barnes Headcanon - Tumblr Posts

first day of spring ft. boyfriend!bucky 🌺🌻🌷

bucky moodboards list

affair with lawyer!neighbour!bucky - sneaking around, age gap, car sex, not so gentle touch 🤎

bucky moodboards list

bang me like those drums

pov: your best friend's older brother is in a band (bestfriendsbrother!drummer!bucky)

bucky moodboards list

dating bucky barnes day vs night ˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥

bucky moodboards list

family bbq, summer dress and dbf!bucky 🥓🥗

bucky moodboards list

mobboss!husband!bucky would definitely have a polaroid pic of you in his wallet

bucky moodboards list

adopting a puppy with bucky barnes so apline can have a sibling 🐶

bucky moodboards list

Hi Star,

sending you loads of love!

i just wanted to know does chubby bucky's have any love languages that the reader figures out over time together?

Words of affirmation

Bucky low key has a praise kink. It took a while for you to realize it. The first time you complimented his baking skills, a ruddy flush swept across his cheeks and down his neck, he stammered out the most endearing thank you.

You really began to suspect it the time you mentioned how amazing he was for taking care of you when you were sick the night before, by the time you finished speaking, Bucky resembled the three-tier red velvet cake he was frosting.

And then one night, while you two were making love, you told him how good he was making you feel and he became feral, wanting-needing-to hear those words again and again.

Bucky expresses his affection by writing you the sweetest love notes before he goes to the bakery in the morning. He texts you random things throughout the day. He noticed when you change your hair, or get something new and he compliments you every chance you get. Constantly encouraging you to try new things, building you up, always believing in you.

Quality time

Because of his long hours at the bakery, he cherishes every moment he gets to spend with you. Big fancy dates are fun but it's the nights with the two of you bundled up on the couch under a mountain of blankets, his head on your stomach, arms banded around you while a movie plays. Or dinners with you sitting on his lap in the middle of the living room sharing one plate of food as you talk about your day.

Nothing compares to the afternoons spent in the kitchen with Bucky teaching how to make his favorite desserts, or wandering through the farmers market, your hand in his while he meticulously browses through the selections.

His absolute favorite moments with you. The ones that get him through a long, exhausting day are when you wake up with him, keeping him company while he gets ready. Some mornings you'll shave his beard, some days he'll talk you into quickie in the shower. But it always ends with him kissing you're both breathless.

Acts of service

Bucky loves to do things for you. Whether it's creating a signature dish for you or filling up your gas tank and washing your car so you never have to worry about it.

He gives massages, makes you playlists, and plans date nights that revolve around your interests.

If you need something done, Bucky will do it for you. No complaints, he doesn't bring it up later.

Bucky appreciates all the things you do for him. It means the world when you stop by the bakery with lunch or you get his favorite apron dry cleaned.

god i love your smut it's so hot i had to hold my breath.. but can you imagine? reader work in a coffee shop and charles blackwood always come by and sit around, flirting and some time later she finally gave in and some guys also always come and try to flirt her, she always ignore them. and one day charles is in the shop when the guys come, reader brave herself to talk to them and when charles order is ready she went to him and charles casually grab her ass showing them who she belongs to..

ahhh Charles Blackwood i- 

a/n: NOT MY GIF!

Oh lord okay I love this

Because Charles does look like the type who would be very, very protective of his woman

So, you own a coffee shop

And Charles visits it often, just to see you

Maybe he liked your hair, or your eyes, or your voice

You were kind, and you kept the conversation going

And Charles would find himself coming back unnecessarily for more coffee multiple times a day

He’d sit there at the counter, and shamelessly flirt with you

He’d compliment you all the time

Even asked you go out with him for a ride someday

In the beginning you’d say no 

He’d fake pout and tell you that you were breaking his heart

He’d be persistent though

Eventually, you gave in and agreed to go on a long drive/date with him

You and Charles were nothing official, yet. 

But he would be the type to sneak into your room at night, just to kiss you good night 

Or steal a kiss or two when he’d come by your coffee shop

You had always seen his sweet, gentle side

However, you soon realized that he was also very, very protective of you

One time, Charles was sat at one of the booths; waiting on his order 

And while you made him his coffee, two people walked in

Two of your regular clients

You weren’t one to openly talk to random men but since they came to your shop everyday, you felt like you had to be nice and stop ignoring them

You smiled at them and made a small talk. One of the guys complimented how good you looked in your little uniform and you giggled

And that made Charles send his best death glare to the young man talking to you

He wanted nothing more than to just walk up to him, grab him by the collar and tell him you belonged to him

But he had to be on his best behavior 

Charles watched and waited

He saw how you casually talked to the guys

He noticed how each time you turned around, they both checked you out and snickered behind your back

And he hated it

He didn’t like people looking at what’s his

And when you grabbed his coffee cup and walked over to where he was sat

He smirked at you then looked behind you to make sure that the guys were watching

Charles’ hand shamelessly slipped past your red apron and circled around your body and landed right on your ass

He grabbed your butt cheek and pulled you into him

You widened your eyes at his scandalous behavior but he just smirked and kept going 

“You do look good in your uniform, doll. I bet you look even better without it.” he spoke, and you gasped at his choice of words

The guys were dead silent upon hearing his voice. 

Charles’ grip on your ass was firm

“What do you say, maybe i could take you out on a real date tonight? And then take you home, yeah?” he spoke and then tilted his head to the side to look at the two guys at the counter

The ones who dared to even flirt with his girl

“Maybe then people will know that you belong to me, and they’ll stop looking at what doesn’t belong to them” he spat, with a sly smirk at the end

Within the next few seconds, the two guys rushed out of your shop; leaving only you and Charles in. 

And he finally let go of your butt

“Charles, that was mean” you chided him.

He looked up at you in disbelief and stepped out of the booth, pulling you closer to him again

“Mean? They were checking you out. And I don’t like people looking at what’s mine,” he’d tell you, leaning in to kiss you at the side of your mouth. 

Charles kept his promise. 

He did take you out, and he did take you home

And from then on, you were his girl. 

And he made sure that everybody knew

Keep reading

😭 yall ever find a account and its just a holy grail of good fics 😝💕💖💓💗 it had so many good bucky fics good gawd!! I didn't mean to spam like but I got too looped into the story's my lawd 😩 distracted me from my sickness oh lawdy

Update: 🫤I think I got blocked by that account. 💔🥲 I loved that account, one of my favorites

A Relationship with Bucky Barnes:

Headcanon: Your life with Bucky over the years Bucky Banres x Y/N  warnings: none  Words: 2742 English is not my first language. All mistakes are my own.I hope you enjoy reading.

You get to know him during your university internship for Stark Industries. In your first week you get lost in the Stark Tower and suddenly find yourself in a large training room. Bucky is hitting a punching bag and when it rips out of its anchoring you can't suppress a shocked scream. He whirls around and stares at you. "Who are you? And what are you doing here?" he asks in a dark, angry voice that sends a shiver down your spine. "I'm Y / N, Tony's intern, and I got lost." you whisper and notice how the blood rushes into your cheeks with shame. Immediately Bucky will calm down, you are not a threat. "Come on I'll show you the way, I always got lost in the beginning." "Thank you, Sergeant Barnes." you say, still embarrassed "Bucky." does he improve you. "Thanks Bucky."

 And suddenly you keep bumping into him. They are random situations. You meet at dinner in the cafeteria, at the same time you call it a day and meet in the parking lot, funny enough, his car is always parked near yours. You will always find something to talk about. When your car doesn't start one evening, he immediately offers to drive you home. As you sit in the passenger seat in his car and his scent envelops you, you notice how your heart starts beating faster. It will take another three days to realize that you are in love with him.

On the last day of your internship, he suddenly appears in your office. “Bucky? You ask concerned, who has never been in your office. "Today is your last day." It's a statement, not a question, but you answer anyway. "Yes." Bucky seems kind of nervous, something you have never noticed on him. "I took your spark plugs out of your car." he says in the ensuing silence. "What?" you ask, confused, you have no idea what he is talking about. "I manipulated your car so that I could drive you home. I know that was not okay at all. But I wanted to spend more time with you and that was kind of the only way I could think of. I know it was stupid. I'm sorry. "And then you realize that your meetings weren't that random. You take a deep breath and scrunch up all your self-confidence." Are you going out with me? "Bucky was expecting an outburst of anger or that you are disgusted, but not this question." That was my text. "He says after a moment of silence, in which you have become almost insane." Is that a yes? "You ask uncertainly. "I'll pick you up at 8. “

He brings flowers to your first date. You have a wonderful evening together, and he will bring you to your doorstep in the evening. "Would you like to come up for a coffee with me?" you ask him, he has held your hand the whole way, but now he lets go of it. Bucky suddenly seems insecure. "I've seen a couple of shows and movies that Sam recommended to me and well in those movies coffee always means sex and Y / N you're really great and I like you, I really like you. But you know I'm a little older and was brought up differently ... " "I really only meant coffee." you interrupt him and blush at the same time, you really just wanted to be nice and didn't think how he could interpret your question. "This is embarrassing now" he says. "It's cute. And I like you, too, Bucky."

Two weeks after your first date, he asks you if you officially want to be his girlfriend. You say yes right away.

When you are in his apartment for the first time, you are a little shocked. He has hardly any furniture, nothing in this apartment is personal and it looks more like a hotel room. His duvet and pillow are on the floor next to the bed. "Do you sleep on the floor?" you ask, he looks to one side, ashamed. "The bed doesn't feel right." he closes the bedroom door. "Can we talk about it another time? Would you like to watch a movie?" Actually, you want to force him to talk to you about it, but you know it has something to do with his past as a Winter Soldier, so you nod. "I'll be here when you're ready." you say and kiss his cheek. "I think a film would be nice." He brings you home in the evening, kiss you at the doorsteps and waits until you're in your apartment and turn on the light in the kitchen. You know he does this to make sure you're safe. Even if you find it over the top, it's kind of cute too and you feel protected.

You don't often notice that Bucky comes from another time, only in some points it shows. For example, it doesn't take long for you to find out that he has no clue about social media. And he doesn't even try.

"Snapshot" "Snapchat" "Whatever."

He writes you love letters and you collect them all in a box under your bed.

"I sleep on the floor because the bed is too soft. It feels like I'm lying on cotton wool and sinking into it. Then I feel like I'm suffocating." He whispers one evening when you're watching one of your favourite movies. You turn to him. "Can I help you with this?" you ask him softly, your voice trembles but your heart leaps with joy because he opens up to you. "Dr. Raynor says it's a symptom of my trauma. But I'm working on it with her, don't worry about me.” "I'm your girlfriend, it's my job to worry.” you say with a crooked grin. “Thank you for opening up to me" you add.

You say "I love you." first. It just slip out on one of your coffee dates. Bucky picked you up on his lunch break from your morning class at university and you went to his favourite café. A cosy little café with fresh cakes and delicious coffee. Bucky tells a Story of a malfunction of Sam's wings, which caused him to hang under the ceiling in the training room and not be able to land. His eyes sparkle happily at the memory, but instead of reacting to his funny story, the three words just slip out of you. Bucky falls silent and just looks at you. "That was my text."

He introduce you to Steve and Sam first. He's taking you to the game night in Steve's apartment. "You really do exist." Sam greets you at the door. "Shut up." Bucky growls and hits him on the arm. "Ouch. Be careful with your super soldier strength, you could have broken my arm." says Sam in a playful tone. "If he wanted to break your arm, your arm would have been broken." Steve interferes. "Y / N, nice to finally get to know you. Bucky has told us a lot about you. Come in." you enter the comfortably furnished apartment. "Hopefully only good things." "Please he keeps telling you how great you are." "Shut up Sam or I won't just break your arm." Bucky interferes. You smile you kiss his cheek.

He introduces you to the other Avengers one by one, and it doesn't take long and you have girls' evenings with Natascha and Wanda.

"Do you want to get to know my parents?" "You want to introduce me to your parents?" "Yes. You're coming to town for the weekend. If you don't want to, I can understand." "Of course, I want to meet your parents."

He's nervous when you meet your parents for dinner. Your mother will take him to her heart right away. Your father doesn't. Nobody is good enough for his little princess.

But fate is on your side. At dessert, two children approach you uncertainly. "Can we have an autograph, Sergeant Barnes, sir? Please." the little boy asks uncertainly. "And a photo?" adds the girl. Bucky smiles friendly, even if you can see how uncomfortable he is in the situation. "Of course." he says and signs on a napkin. You take the mother's cell phone and take a few photos of the kids and Bucky. "Thank you, Sergeant Barnes. You are my favourite Avenger." "You are welcome." the children happily run back to their table. "I'm sorry." Bucky turns to your parents. "Oh, that's not a problem at all." answers your mother. "Sergeant Barnes? You served?" "Yes, 107th Infantry Regiment." your father nods approvingly. He is a patriot and proud of his military career. “Y / N finally has a boyfriend who knows what it means to be proud of his country. Not like the last one who didn't even have a real job. "You roll your eyes." Paul was a web designer and worked for a food blog. "" I have no idea what half of these words mean, "says your father "Me neither” Bucky agrees, and your father has accepted your new boyfriend.

You've been together for 4 months when he stays overnight for the first time. The whole time he was afraid to scare you off with his nightmares. But he didn't have any that night. Bucky slept the whole night and when he woke up the next morning, he felt more rested than he has been in a long time.

But Bucky's hopes are dashed when the nightmares return a few weeks later, the fact that you lay next to him didn't help that night.

You wake up to hear a heartbreaking scream full of pain. You quickly turn on the light. Bucky is rolling in the sheets next to you, cold sweat is on his forehead and all his muscles are tense. You carefully try to wake him up, but you can't. "Bucky, Bucky wake up." a hard blow on his chest finally pulls him out of his nightmares. When you look into his dark eyes you flinch, these are not the friendly, warm blue eyes that you are used to. Only pain, suffering and death are reflected in these eyes. It takes Bucky a second to realize that you are not a threat to him, that he is not the Winter Soldier and that everything is fine.

That second scares him to death. "It's too dangerous, I could have killed you." "I trust you." "Don´t do it." "I won't let you leave me! You said you love me." "I'm doing this because I love you Y / N! I could have killed you." "It was only a second and then you knew where you are." "One second is enough." A cold chill runs down your spine at these words, but you shake your head anyway. "No! I get through this with you."

You are talking to Dr. Raynor, and ask how you can help Bucky. She has a few useful tips, but even those don't help every night. Every time Bucky is awakened by one of his nightmares, you hold him in your arms. You whisper soothing words, rock him back and forth a little like a child until he manages to fall asleep again. Bucky always feels guilty in the morning that he wakes you up, but you don't care. "I told you I get through this with you." "I do not deserve you." "Ey! I'm not that bad." "It was not meant like that." "I know I love you James." "I love you Y/ N."

The hardest thing for you is when he's on missions. Every time he's gone you almost worry, even if he keeps saying that it's not a big thing and that his job isn't as dangerous as it seems. Still, you hate it, but you also know that his job is important and that it is important to him.

 you miss him too much, you take the letters from the box under the bed and read them.

You travel together a lot, Bucky wants to see all the places he was as the Winter Soldier, but this time as himself. "I want to replace these memories with new ones. With good memories. And with you I have the best memories."

You find out you are pregnant when he is on an extended mission.

You call Natascha immediately crying because you are not allowed to call him, but you need someone to talk to. 20 minutes later she and Wanda are at your door.

"I thought you were taking the pill." "Apparently it doesn't help against super soldier sperm. Oh god! I'm having a super soldier baby. And I have to quit my studies." "You're almost finished, there is still enough time to finish the semester before the baby comes. You just take a break. That is the least of the problem." Natascha speaks calmly to you. "Don't always worry so much Y / N. Everything will be fine for sure." Wanda agrees. "You have to calm down now.” “ I can't calm down! Bucky and I have never discussed the subject of children, what if he doesn't want one? Or if he doesn't want one with me." "I doubt it."

You have to wait two more weeks for Bucky to come back.

When you tell him with tears in your eyes that you are pregnant he hugs you tightly and whirls you through the air with joy. All the fear that he would not be happy is gone. "That breaks my whole plan a little." he says, still smiling. But it gives you a stomach ache and tears come to your eyes again. "If you don't want a child with me, I understand." Bucky's eyes widen immediately. "What? No. Don't you want children with me?" "Of course! I love you, but we never talked about it and I don't want to ruin your plans for the future and ..." "Doll! Not another word." you fall silent and look at him. Bucky smiles at you from above. "I didn't mean my future plans. Actually, I had planned to wait until it gets warmer, take you to Corny Island, ride the Ferris wheel with you and ask you if you want to marry me at sunset." He rummages in his pocket and pulls out a beautiful engagement ring. You clasp your hands over your mouth, tears well up again, but this time for joy. "You just have a ring like that in your pocket?" "I've been carrying it around with me for weeks. I didn't want you to find it while cleaning up or anything." "Yes." is the only thing you can get out Bucky grins slightly and then shakes his head. "That will not do." he takes your hand and goes down on one knee. "Y / N do you want to do me the honor and marry me?" "Yes, of course. Yes!" he puts the ring on your trembling finger and kisses you.

Bucky was brought up differently than you, he comes from a different time and that's why it's important to him that everything is in the right order, dates, marriage, moving in together, children. He never said it, but you know it. You know that it is important to him and that after all these years in which he had no control over his life he wanted at least a little order now. Your pregnancy brings a bit of a mess in this order. So a week after his proposal you sit down at a table with Wanda, Natascha and your mother and plan the perfect, small wedding. Your mom doesn't know you're pregnant and you want it to stay it that way until after the wedding. It would take place in 2 months, and until then you should be able to keep it a secret. "Why the rush?" asks your mother. "Because we love each other."

And it's the perfect wedding. You marry the perfect man, in the perfect dress, in the perfect place. When you exchange vows and Bucky puts the gold wedding ring on your finger, tears run down your cheeks, but you are very calm. You are not nervous or afraid of the future. Because with Bucky by your side, you know that you can do anything. You have the feeling that in this moment all parts come together perfectly and when you see blue eyes in Bucky, you know that he feels it too.

Ghost of you

summary: You've had a really shitty week, and to top it all off, the guy you've been dating for almost half a year also ghosted you. Just to suddenly appear in your living room with the worst excuse ever, or is it maybe the truth?

Bucky Barnes x Reader (Y/N) 

warnings: low self-esteem, trust issues, mention of violence, injuries, mention of the winter soldier, mention of torture and kidnapping 

words: 3508

You can also read this on AO3. 

and like always English is not my fist language so forgive me for my mistakes 

(GIF not mine)

It has rained all day, and in the early evening, heavy raindrops are still falling from the New Yorker sky. You drop your backpack next to the door and take a deep breath. The cold rain pulls your mood down even further. You had a shitty day. At first you overslept and were late for your morning college class, then your annoying professor talked bad about your last project and one of your fellow students, a slimy guy named Taylor, who kept asking for a date, no matter how often you say no, tried to cheer you up with some stupid sayings. "Maybe chemistry isn't the right class for you" and "In my opinion woman don't belong into science." Of course that didn't help. You had to pull yourself together not to beat him, but you didn't get through four years of studying organic chemistry and to get throw out of college now. In summary, you had a shitty day. Exhausted, you hang up your jacket and peel off your wet clothes. A hot bath will do you good now. While you walk through your small apartment to the bathroom, you check your cell phone. You have a few messages from your friends, an email with updates on your study group, and a missed call from your mom. But of course that one person didn't write to you. You haven't received a message from him for 5 days. Did you do something wrong? Said something stupid? Or is that just his way of telling you that he's no longer interested in you? Actually, you wouldn't think Bucky do something like that, he's a gentleman through and through and even brought you flowers on your first date. Usually you're not like that, you've never depended your mood on a man's attention, but everything is different with him somehow. The last six months you've been dating Bucky and everything has been kind of perfect. He's charming, polite, friendly and treats

 you well, plus he's incredibly handsome. And of course you fell in love with him. How could you not. Frustrated, you put your cell phone down next to the sink and let in the bath water. A bath will relax you, and then you will call your best friend and complain about Bucky. She's going to fall into hate speech about men and wishing again and again that she was a lesbian, then the two of you could get married. Unfortunately, neither of you are really into women. So this is what your Friday evening looks like, a lonely bath and a poor phone call while you cry over your sad single life. Maybe a box of Ben & Jerry's ice cream too. You sink into the hot water and lean back in the tub. The pleasant warmth is good for you and you will notice how your tense muscles relax.But the peace doesn't last long because your thoughts wander back to Bucky. It bothers you a little that you care so much about his attention, but you have got used to them. He usually texts you regularly, asking how your day is, how your classes are going and whether you can keep up with your assignments. Sometimes you wake up in the morning with a message from him telling you that he has a stressful day ahead of him, but he wishes you a nice day and would text you as soon as he can. You sigh, this time you haven't heard from him, at some point he just stopped getting an answer. Actually, you thought everything was going well. Bucky was the first man you trusted again after your ex boyfriend cheated on you after five years of dating. You've been taking it easy, going on dates, hanging out with each other, and feeling like you really got to know each other. He even told you about his nightmares and therapy, even if he never told you the reason, you noticed how difficult it was for him to open up, to be so vulnerable. Bucky met your friends and you wanted to introduce him to your parents by the end of the month. At least that was the plan. But maybe it was all just a trick of his? A trick to get you to bed, a trick that worked. Maybe it's because of this? Maybe you're bad in bed? But he never mentioned that he was dissatisfied. Apparently all men are the same. You shake your head to get rid of these thoughts, then take a deep breath and sink back in the bathtub so far that your head slips under the water. You enjoy the peace and quiet underwater, but unfortunately you run out of oxygen far too quickly, so you have to surface again. The water around you is slowly getting cold, for a moment you think about running warm water again, but you decide against it and climb out of the tub. You wrap yourself in a large, soft towel and grab your cell phone. Of course he didn't answer. Maybe you need a bottle of wine and a romantic comedy, after that you would be better off and maybe you could forget that the guy you had been dating for almost 6 months was ghosting you. You slip into your cozy pajamas, which you put on the bathroom heater this morning. You'd like to pat yourself on the back for this great idea. You leave the bathroom and make your way to the kitchen, your phone in hand, even if you know he won't answer. Have you been too clingy? Or did you tell him too soon that you love him? Wait a minute, you didn't tell him that, only thought a few times but never said it. Your mind wanders to your last date. It was movie night so you guys were watching one of those classics that Bucky loves to watch. And every time you have the feeling he is watching the film for the first time and does not know what it is about. As if the storylines and characters weren't widely known, at least if you haven't lived in a cave for the past 50 years. When you saw Titanic you felt like he was really surprised when Jack died. But maybe you just imagined it all. Maybe you don't know him as well as you thought. After the movie you went to bed and fell asleep in his arms. You remember that the last thought you had was that you never felt as safe with anyone as you did with Bucky. The next morning you had breakfast together and then he drove to work. Before he left the apartment, he gave you a passionate kiss, but he didn't ask when you would next see each other. Something he usually always did. But he called you that evening and complained about his coworker Sam and his constant good mood at work. For the next few days you kept writing messages and making phone calls, but suddenly it stopped. No more calls, no more answers to your message. Not even when asked if something happened and why he doesn't answer you. Complete radio silence for 5 days. You feel the tears welling up in your eyes, but you don't want to cry. Not about some stupid, handsome, charming guy like James Buchanan ,,Bucky” Barnes. Maybe you're just not the kind of woman men can imagine a future with. "Hello Y / N." you jump a bit forward in shock when you hear Bucky voice behind you. Then you turn to him. He's sitting on the sofa in your dark living room, you can only make out his outlines. "What are you doing here?" you piss at him, your heart still beats faster with fright. You turn on the light and when you can see him properly you flinch again. There are cuts streaked through his face, covered with a few patches, he has one black eye, and the knuckles of his hand are red and scarred. His normally bright blue eyes look tired and dull. "What happened?" you ask him and walk up to him, you sink to your knees in front of him and take his left hand in yours and carefully study the many injuries on his face. Now you can also see the bandage wrapped around his shoulder and the large hematoma that runs from his neck and presumably all the way down his shoulder blades and back. Bucky carefully lifts his hand and strokes your cheek. The cold metal on your warm skin makes you shiver slightly, but you lean into its touch. Forgotten is all the anger and sadness about ignoring your messages. "A lot of things went wrong this time." this answer doesn't really make you any smarter. "What do you mean?" you ask confused. "And why do you show up after almost a week of not hearing from you and look like you've been beaten up?" "I'm sorry. I'll explain everything to you. Please can I just hold you in my arms for a moment?" Still confused about the whole situation, you nod and let him pull you onto his lap. His arms wrap around your body and you nestle against his chest. You take a deep breath of his familiar smell, a few drops of water fall from his hair onto your cheek. He smells like shampoo, bandages and Bucky. It's just quiet for a while and you listen to Bucky´s steady heartbeat. "I'm sorry that I didn't answer your calls and that we haven't seen each other the last few weeks. I was out of town, not even in this country." he whispers softly at some point. "Where have you been?" you ask in the same volume. "Can't tell you." You sigh and sit up a little, his grip on your waist tightening a little, as if he's trying to hold you to himself. " Why are you lying?" you notice how tears well up in your eyes. Even when you are so close, you notice this invisible wall between you. Did he lie to you all along? You are tired of being lied to and it makes you incredibly angry and sad. "Please Y / N. I'm not lying to you. There's only so much I can't tell you. I´m not allowed to tell you." he looks sadly past you to the side. "I don't even know how to explain it to you." "Just try it." you want to tear down this wall, you want to know the truth. Even if it could hurt you. Is he cheating on you too? Does he have another girlfriend? Or maybe he's married and has kids and he's cheating on his wife with you? Does he lead a double life? Bucky takes a deep breath. "You know I have these nightmares." You nod and look at him carefully. "In these nightmares, I see my past. What happened to me or rather what I did. Although I actually didn't do it, not voluntarily. But I did it anyway and that haunts me. And because of that, I go to the therapy. Well, that's why I'm still doing it. It was ordered by court." "Bucky, it doesn't make any sense what you're saying." Bucky takes a deep breath. "I lied." immediately you tense up again and want to free yourself from his embrace, but he holds you tight. "Please listen to me, and when I'm done and you never want to see me again, I'll understand. Then I'll leave and you'll never hear from me again. Please." "I'll listen." "As I said, I lied." he starts again. "When I told you I served in Afghanistan. That was a lie, yes I went to war, but not this one. I went to war in Europe." Confused, you straighten up again. "What are you talking about? There hasn't been a war against the Europeans since 1945." "I know." Bucky is silent again for a moment. “I was born on March 10th, 1917 and I signed up for the war against the Germans in 1942. My best friend was Steve Rogers. He was made a super soldier and when my unit was captured he saved us. We tried to capture a man named Arnim Zola, but there was an accident and I fell off the train. Everyone thought I was dead. But I wasn't, they captured me, experimented on me, make me a super soldier and then they gave me a brain wash. " Bucky clenches his hands in a fist and you hear the soft creak of his prosthesis. He told you he lost his arm in an attack in the war, apparently that was the only part that wasn't a lie. "When the war was over, HYDRA used me to pursue their plans, and after every mission they put me into cryosleep." It will take you a few minutes to think about what he said. On the one hand, it explains a lot, the scars all over his body, the nightmares, the fact that he sometimes behaves as if he came from another time. But on the other hand, this whole story just sounds like a huge, big lie. Of course there are the Avengers, and Steve Rogers the super soldier from WWII, but brainwashing? Cryosleep? And all of that as early as the 1940s. You just can't believe him. You shake your head and break free from his embrace, this time Bucky lets go of you without hesitation. You take a few steps away from him, he is sitting on your couch and looks at you, his beautiful blue eyes are completely dull from the grief. He looks broken. "I don't know if I can believe you. And what does that have to do with the last few days and why do you look like you've been beaten up?" Bucky takes another deep breath. "A few years ago I was sent on a mission to kill Captain America. But Steve recognized me, he tried to help me. And when the helicarriers crashed, everything came back. I knew who I was again." He pauses briefly, you can see on his face that the memory is causing him pain. You remember the news report, there was talk of a Helicarrier malfunction. You look at Bucky and wait for him to continue talking. "Steve was trying to protect me, a lot of things went wrong back then. He had a fight with Tony because of me. I went to Wakanda to get the brainwashed out, it worked. The trigger words don't work anymore, but the memories are still there. I'm working on it with Dr. Raynor, and in the meantime I'm working with the Avengers now. I'm trying to somehow make amends for what I did then. I'm trying to help now and do what's right." Bucky falls silent and you try to understand what he just told you. Can this really be true? Or is it all just one giant lie? But why would he bother to think of something like that? But the whole story sounds so unbelievable. So unbelievable it could be the truth. "I don't know if I can believe you." you whisper into the resulting silence. "And if you're really telling the truth, why are you putting yourself in such danger? Look at you, Bucky, you're covered in bruises." "I have to do this and it's not really dangerous for me. Give me 2 days and all the scratches will be gone." Scratches. He really calls his wounds scratches, you shake your head in disbelief. He looks like he fell out of a moving car into a chasm and then got a good beating. He would never heal so quickly. "I'm a Super Soldier Y/N, like Steve. The serum makes me heal faster." he answers your unasked question. "Okay, let's say I would believe your story, I still don't understand why you put yourself in such danger? Why don't you do anything else? Why do you do this? What do you have to make up for? Did you kill someone? " "I've killed countless people Y / N. Innocent people. People who didn't fit HYDRA, political opponents, but also civilians, scientists, presidents, monarchs, politicians. And that for more than 70 years. I have a lot to make up for. I'm a killer, an assassin, a monster. As a Winter Soldier, there were no morals, there were no limits. There were only missions. I didn't ask why I should take out my targets, they probably wouldn't have answered me anyway, I just obeyed the orders. I was a weapon, I am a weapon. But now at least I'm the one pulling the trigger." You take a step towards him carefully, placing your hand on his arm and stroking his cheek with the other, tears glistening in his eyes and he leans into your touch. "I can understand if you're afraid of me now." His voice trembles and it almost tears your heart. Suddenly you are sure that he is telling the truth, you believe him. He could never think of something like that. He could never act the suffering, the fear and the pain. "May I hug you?" you ask quietly. Bucky immediately grabs your waist and pulls you back onto his lap, his arms closing around you and hugging you. He buries his head in the crook of your neck and takes a deep breath. "I'm sorry I lied. I wanted to tell you but I just couldn't. When I met you I thought wow, how can a person be so perfect? ​​How can a person be so good? I didn't deserve you, not after everything I've done. I didn't want you to know that I'm a monster. I wanted your perfect, peaceful world to stay the way it is. I never wanted to hurt you." “You're not a monster. Even if I can't quite grasp the whole situation, I know this for sure. You are not this person anymore, this … this…” "Winter Soldier." "Yes exactly, this Winter Soldier. You are not that monster that you are describing. It cannot be. The Bucky I know is nice, attentive and caring, you are one of the best people I know.” "But I wasn´t always like this, I am this monster, or I was and a part of the Winter Solider is still in me.” "No!" do you contradict him. "You're trying to make things right. You realized it was wrong. And you said you were brainwashed. Everything you did as a Winter Solider wasn't your choice, it wasn't your fault. These HYDRA people used you, you are a victim as well as all the people they had killed." Bucky's grip tightens a little, and only now do you realize how strong he really is, how long he had to hide his true power. He did it not to scare you, he lied to you because he doesn´t want to burden you with his trauma. He wanted your life to be free from the shadows of his past. You feel something wet drip onto your shoulder, and it takes you a moment to realize it's Bucky's tears. You carefully stroke his short hair, trying to calm him down. "I am sorry." he whispers into your neck. "You don't have to be sorry. I'm glad you told me the truth and I'll try to understand it. I'll try to help you. We're a team after all." "You won't leave me?" "No. Of course not. How could I leave you?" you take a deep breath. "I love you." Bucky flinches, then pulls away from you to look into your eyes. "I don't deserve your love." "Do not say something like that." He leans in a little to put his lips on yours, it's only a brief touch, but it makes your heart skip a beat and causes a pleasant warmth throughout your body. "I love you Y/N. I've wanted to tell you this for so long, but I was scared the whole time. I'm sorry if I hurt you, I didn't mean to lie." "It's okay. Sure, I've been mad and hurt and I've cursed you and sent you to hell more than once in the past week, but I understand you better now. Thanks for telling me." You kiss him, then lean back into his arms, the pain is gone from his eyes and he has a hint of a smile on his lips. Bucky hugs you tightly and gently strokes your back. You don't know exactly how long you've been sitting on your couch like this, but it's a nice feeling, you feel safe with him and you're glad that invisible wall between you has started to crumble. He opened up to you, told you the truth and showed you that he trusts you. And you're sure he has no idea how much that means to you. How much he means to you.

Right in front of you - Bucky Barnes x Reader (AU)

Summary: Natasha's new boyfriend doesn't like the fact that she and her ex Bucky are still good friends. So Natasha lies and drags you into a fake relationship with your best friend. What could possibly go wrong?

words: 16.189

warngins: drinking, make- out, a bit angst?, talk about suicide (briefly, not explicitly), swearing / language// ( I think thats all, correct me if I am wrong)

A/N: fake dating trope, Miscommunication, fluff, best friends to lovers// Avengers as a chaotic group of friends// AU// English is not my first language// no beta// Gif not mine// AO3.

Relationships: Bucky x Y/N // Natasha x Bucky (previously; mention)// Natasha x Bruce (previously; mention)// Natasha x Y/N (platonic) // Tony Stark x Y/N (platonic)

I had this in my drafts since 2022, but totally forget about it. Last weekend I rewatch tfatws (Yes, the whole season I have no self-control) and god sebastian stand is one of the most handsome man alive. I revised this draft and added about 10K words. This wasn't originally planned. Sooo anyways have fun with this :) Love to all of you ❤️.

You sit on Natasha´s comfortable couch and take a sip of your coffee. Your best friend called you in the morning and asks for this catch up and said she had a level 9 Problem. So you have been sitting here for almost 2 hours. You and Nat hand already exchanged all the important news form the last few weeks, but Natasha hadn´t yet said whats her level 9 problem is. "So why did you want to talk with me so badly Nat? We have talked about everything now." you say.

Natasha sights."I messed up."

"What happend?" you ask now worried.

"It is about Rick."

Her new boyfriend. He´s a pretty nice guy, from what Nat said. But you haven´t meet him yet. Natasha dates him for 3 month now.

"What did you do?" you asks. Since are when you have to pull every word out of her nose? Nat hesitates for a moment and takes a sip from her coffee.

"Okay. Please listen to me. I know I messed up but I have a plan. And for this plan I need your help."

"I will listen."

"So, Rick and I, we talked about our friends last week and you know we had already talked about our exes. And now he knows that I am still firends with Bucky. But Rick doesn´t think it is cool that I am still friends with him." she stopps and you look confused. You don´t see a Level 9 Problem with this. Natascha and Bucky were together for a few months and that was almost 3 years ago. So why is it a problem?"Y/N I am so sorry. It was a dump idear but it was the frist thing that comes to my mind. And I was pressed for time."

"Natasha! What did you do?" you ask again, now a bit annoyed.

"I told Rick you and Bucky are together."

"You did what?" you ask shocked and a little angry. Is she serious?

"I am so sorry. But besides Bucky, you are the only single in our group. And after that Rick was fine with Bucky as my friend."

"Natasha! What a stupid idear. And what´s your plan now? We all meet Rick this weekend."

"I know, I know. I already texted Bucky, but he is still at work, he says he will call me later."

"And what do you want me to do?"

"Lie for me? Please Y/N." she looks desperately at you. As if you could refuse her something when she looked at you like that. You shigh and in her look you can see that she knows she won.

"Fine. If Bucky is okay with it, I will pretend to be his girlfriend. But Nat, for how long do you think we can lie to him?"

"Not for long, just a few weeks. And than you and Bucky can pretend that you have broken up and remain friends. So Rick can see that Bucky can be just friends with his ex- girlfriends and everything will be fine." She smiles and you sigh again. What could go wrong? Except from everything.

"Fine! But I don´t like this plan."

"I know. And I am sorry."

"Its okay."

*

You enter your apartment and close the door behind you. You are not sure if Natashas plan will work. But you are her friend, so you will help her, no matter what. Your phone rings, you fummel it out of your Pocket. Bucky. You answer the call.

"Hey Bucks what up?"

Bucky came as Natashas Boyfriend in your friendgroup, but after a few weeks he was friends with all of you, and after he and Nat broke up, they reminds friends and Bucky stays with your group. You are glade he did, you really like him. In the last years, he became your best friend. He even integrated Steve and Peggy into your circle of friends.

"Hey Y/N. How are you? Have you talked with Nat?"

"I´m fine. Yes I have. What do you think about her plan?"

"It´s stupid." he laughs. "But I said I will go with it, if its okay with you."

"I said I will help her."

"Good. Just wanted to make sure you are okay with it."

"If it helps her, of course I'll do it."

"You are a good friend. Then we will see us on Friday. Do you want me to pick you up?"

"Why?" you asks.

"Because we have to preatend we are a coupel." he says as if it were logical. And as if that were normal.

"Right." you start laughing. "It will never work."

"No probally not. But lets give our best to not mess it up for Nat."

"We can try. So you pick me up at 8?"

"I will be at your place."

"Thank you Bucky. See you at Friday."

"See you Friday Doll."

You hate this nickname, but he never listened to you when you said he should stop calling you that. After two years you gave up.

*

Friday is coming sooner than you thought. You've been stressed all week about your work, next week you have to present your new project, but you're still missing some figures from the last quarter, of course the department is lagging behind. So you had to work overtime. On the way home, your mother called you. Your grandma had another argument with her neighbors. Probably something about the garden fence. You couldn't care less. The argument has been going on for years, but your grandma is just stubborn. And she's driving your mother crazy. It took you hours to calm her down and when you finally hang up it's almost seven o'clock. And you haven't eaten anything since your lunch salad. Damn. You're going to your favorite bar tonight, but you can't go out on an empty stomach. You can't tolerate alcohol anyway, and on an empty stomach the evening would probably end over the toilet bowl before midnight. You open your fridge and sigh. Of course you forgot to go grocery shopping. You reach for your phone and dial Bucky’s number.

"Hello Doll." he answers in a good mood. "Everythin alright?

"Yes. Can you come a bit earlier and bring something to eat on the way? I forgot to shop grocerys and haven't eaten anything properly yet."

"Sure I'll do it. We don't want to repeat St. Patrick." he laughs. You grimace at the memory of the evening in which you dumped the contents of your stomach into the Hudson. "Not funny Bucks."

"Maybe not for you. I had a lot of fun making sure you didn't take an involuntary swim and end up as a corpse in the water." you hear him laugh through the phone and roll your eyes. You would like to respond with an embarrassing story from Bucky, but the man can drink like no one else. Sometimes you think he's immune to alcohol. “Is chinese okay?”

"Yes perfect. Please bring.."

"Spring rolls. Yes, I know, doll."

“Lifesaver I Venmo you the money.”

"Absolutely no way!"

"Bucky." you start, you hate it when he invites you out, but Bucky throws his money around like it's nothing. Because it's probably nothing for him. Bucky makes a lot of money with his firm.

"Don't argue. I'm your boyfriend, remember." he laughs. Oh yeah, Natasha's stupid plan.

"I actually forgot." you laugh now.

"My heart just broke." You roll your eyes, but then laugh. As if any woman could ever break James Barnes' heart.

"I'm on my way now, I'll be there quarter past." Your gaze goes to the clock. You've got half an hour, damn it.

"Okay, I still have to get ready. I will be quick."

"See you soon."

"See you soon." You hang up, quickly put your cell phone on the charging cable and sprint into the shower. You also have to wash your hair, you're really not on schedule this week. Bucky only needs 20 minutes, so you open the door for him still in a towel and with your hair half-dried. At least your Make Up is already done.

"What a sight." he laughs and lets his gaze slide over your barely covered body. You feel yourself blushing, even if there's no reason for it. Bucky has already seen you in your underwear, so the towel covers more.

"Charming." You say and let him into your apartment. He throws his keys and wallet into the small bowl next to your door and puts the take away bag on the kitchen counter.

"You know me. Go get ready, we don´t have much time. Since when have you been so late?"

You love punctuality. You think it's rude and disrespectful to make people wait for you, but this week seems to be cursed. You go back to the bedroom to get dressed.

"I've been behind time all week. Work is totally exhausting me. I have to present next week but of course nothing works out the way I want it to." You call loudly from your bedroom so Bucky can hear you as you rummage through your clothes. Of course you had also forgotten to check with Wanda and Natascha what exactly the dress code was for the evening. "Do you know what Nat or Wanda wear?"

"Of course not?"

"Crap."

"You look good in anything, so just wear somthing." he calls from the living room.

"Liar"

"Never Doll."

You pull your black dress out of your closet. It's just the right length to not be slutty. Quickly, but carefully so you not smear your make-up, you slip into the dress. You let your hair fall loosely over your shoulder, but quickly blow-dry it so that you don't look like you've plugged into a socket. You take a quick look at yourself in the mirror, yes, that would work. "How cold is it ?"

"It's summer, so not at all."

"So no tights?"

"No, no tights. Another question I've never asked myself before."

"You're a man, pants and shirt and you're dressed for any occasion." you come out of your bedroom. Bucky is sitting in your kitchen, he has put the food on a plate and has put cutlery out for you and a glass of water next to it. "You are my hero." You say, plopping down in the seat across from him.

"I know." You look at the clock, you actually have to leave in five minutes so as not to be late. You're narrowing your eyes, damn it.

"Now take a deep breath, relax and eat. Then we'll be a little late, it's not the end of the world. Besides, it's not just us, Vision, Wanda, Tony and Rick are there. Nat won´t be alone."

"Steve isn't coming?"

"Nope, Peggy isn't feeling well." You start eating.

"Still not?" you ask worriedly Peggy hasn't been feeling well for a few weeks, hopefully it's nothing more serious. When you spoke to her on the phone last week she sounded tired and exhausted. Bucky grabs one of your spring rolls and dips it in the sauce, a mischievous smile appearing on his face. "What is?" you ask confused.

"I'm not actually allowed to tell you this." You're immediately curious and lean a little further forward in your chair.

"Tell me."

"But swear you won't tell anyone."

"I swear."

"She is pregnant." Your mouth falls open, you expected everything but not this.

“I didn’t know they were trying.” Steve and Peggy have been together since high school, but neither of them have talked about having children until now.

"They didn't, it was an accident but they wanted to keep it." Steve and Peggy as parents? Funnily enough, you can imagine it. "Steve has been through an emotional rollercoaster in the last few weeks, you can't imagine it Y/N." Bucky laughs.

"And he didn't say anything to anyone?"

"No, only I know and now you. So quiet."

"I promise not to say a word."

"Good. Different topic." Suddenly he becomes serious and Bucky's look almost makes your food stick in your throat. "Nat's plan."

"What about it?"

"We should discuss boundaries."

“Boundaries?” you ask confused. What does he mean now? You actually thought you would go to the bar, introduce yourself as boyfriend and girlfriend and sit next to each other. Why do you need boundaries?

"Well, we want Rick to believe us and I think we should kiss for that. Of course only if it's okay with you." It would be a lie if you never imagined kissing Bucky. After all, he's terribly good-looking, charming, friendly, a perfect gentleman. And even if you're embarrassed and would never admit it one night or two when you were alone, Bucky as a fantasy has served you well. But he is also your best friend, your savior in times of need and your best friend's ex. Fantasy is one thing, but in reality?

"Kissing is okay with me." you say. "It just might get weird."

"Why weird?"

"I don't usually kiss my best friends. You're like a brother to me." A shadow crosses Bucky's blue eyes, but he's smiling.

"If you find the thought of kissing me disgusting..."

"I did not say that!" you say quickly. No woman on this planet would associate the idea of ​​kissing James Bucky Barnes with the word disgusting. You are sure of that! "I just think it's weird. The others are there too." you blush at the thought of kissing Bucky in front of all your friends. What have you gotten yourself into? And all because of Nat.

“Do you want to practice?” he asks and a mischievous grin appears on his face.

"I know how to kiss."

"I'm sure you're very good at kissing. I'm just saying so our first kiss isn't in front of everyone else." That sounds like such a stupid idea that it makes oddly enough sense.

"Then let's practice." You say, putting your fork down.

"Are you ready?" he points to your plate. There's still a little food left, but you're full and it should protect you from an alcohol escapade.

"Yes." Bucky takes your plate and cutlery, stands up and puts everything in the sink. Then he leans against your kitchen counter. You sigh and stand up too. You could say you're doing all this just for Natasha, but somehow the thought of kissing Bucky makes you nervous, but in a pleasant way. You walk over to him and stop right in front of Bucky. He's a bit taller than you, so you lean your head back slightly to look him in the eyes.

"Y/N. If you don't want that, we can just cancel it. Nat would understand." He says, looking you in the eyes.

"Nonsense. It's not that bad."

"Thanks."

"Thats not what I meant."

"I know, I'm just messing with you." he grins at you. Then his gaze goes from your eyes to your lips and back to your eyes. Bucky lifts his hand and places it carefully on your cheek. Then he leans forward. His lips touch yours and you freeze for a second. But then you move your lips against his, your hand automatically laying on his chest. Bucky’s hand moves from your cheek to your neck and he pulls you closer to him. The next moment his tongue slides into your mouth and you press yourself closer to his muscular body. But then you flinch. What are you doing here? You open your eyes and see it straight into Bucky’s. His gaze sweeps over your face as if he’s searching for something. "Too much?"

"No. I was just surprised." you feel your heart thundering in your chest. You feel strange, but not bad. And it wasn't as uncomfortable or weird as you thought. It was nice.

"And weird?"

"Not for me."

"For me either. You are a good kisser."

You hit him on the chest "Jerk."

Bucky laughs. "Come on now. We're late." he then says. You quickly grab your coat, throw your cell phone and wallet into your bag and slip on your high heels. "But I won't carry you home later if your feet hurt." Bucky says as he packs up his things again.

"You're taking me home?"

"Of course. I'm the perfect boyfriend." You roll your eyes. Why does he actually enjoy this lie so much?

"Come now perfect boyfriend." You say, pushing him out of your apartment and closing the door behind you.

Even though you hurry, you're almost 30 minutes late when you get to the front door of the bar. From outside you see your friends already sitting at one of the tables. "Ready for our big show?" Bucky asks you.

"It's a good thing I was at the Theater Club."

"I did not know that." he says surprised.

"Why sould you?" Bucky shrugs. Then he opens the door and gestures for you to go ahead. "Gentleman."

"Always." You enter and as you walk through the half-full bar to the table where your friends are already sitting, Bucky place his hand on the small of your back. When you get to the table you can’t help but smile. You hadn't seen Wanda for at least 2 weeks, Vision even longer than that and apart from a phone call last weekend, you've barely had any contact with Tony. It's unusual for your friend group, but at the moment you're all kind of busy doing something. That's how it is when you grow up.

"Hey guys." you say happily. "I'm so sorry we're late."

"That was 100% my fault." Bucky says.

"Our two lovebirds." Tony says and winks. You ignore him and turn to the only strange face at the table.

"And you must be Rick?"

"Yes, hello, Nice to meet you." he holds out his hand to you.

“I’m Y/N.” You say, shaking his hand. "That's my boyfriend." That sounds strange.

"James." Bucky shakes Rick's hand too, but you can tell by the way his muscles tense that he's shaking it unnecessarily hard, despite his smile. Wanda slides to the side so you and Bucky can sit on the bench next to her. Vision looks between you and Bucky, confused.

"Did I miss som...."

“Rick, I want something to drink, then we can bring something for Bucky and Y/N too.” Natasha says quickly and practically pushes Rick off the bench. You hear the panic in her voice.

“Bring something for me too.” says Tony, downing his half-full beer in just a few sips and then fumbling his credit card with grand gestures out of his pocket to give it to Natasha. Yeah, not strange at all or anything. Rick goes to the bar and before Natascha follows him she gives Wanda a quick, slightly angry look.

"Sorry." she whispers, Natasha disappears after Rick. "I totally forgot to tell you." She then says to Vision. "Bucky and Y/N act like they're together. Because Rick doesn't like the idea of ​​Nat and Bucky being together."

"What?" Vision looks between all of you, confused.

Tony starts laughing. "If you say it out loud it sounds even stupider."

"No shit Sherlock." you say.

"Bucky and Natasha used to date?" Oh poor Vision, sometimes you forget that he hasn't known you that long and that sometimes Wanda doesn't think about all the details. Not because she means anything bad, but because she is simply forgetful.

"Long before your time." Tony says in response to Vision's question

"Three years ago, but only briefly."Bucky says now.

"Then what's Rick's problem?"

"We do not know." you say. "But that's Natascha's thing, she asked us to do it and we're playing along."

“Red flag nonetheless.” says Wanda. Tony nods.

"Please! This is Natasha's first relationship since Bruce. We're meeting Rick for the first time today so please guys be nice. And stop your prejudices and red flags. We don't really know him." You're briefly afraid that the mood will change because you mentioned Bruce, but Tony just rolls his eyes and then agrees with you

"You're right. And we're always nice."

"That's a lie." Wanda says and you join in her laughter. A moment later, Nat and Rick come back to the table. A mojito is placed in front of you and you grin at your best friend.

"Thanks."

"Thank Tony, that was on his card."

"You make me poor."

"You're a billionaire heir." Bucky interjects and takes the beer from Natasha.

"Really?" Rick asks as he sits back down in his seat.

"Ever heard of Stark Industries?"

"The weapons company?" Tony rolls his eyes.

"Former weapons company." and you can tell from his look that Rick has already been written off by him. You kick him under the table. "Be nice." You whisper, gladly that Rick is talking to Vison. Tony rolls his eyes, but then clinks his new beer with everyone, including Rick. You all catch up on what's going on. Your conversation briefly turns to Peggy and her mysterious illness.

"She works in a kindergarten, where you're always catching something." you say quickly. Bucky grins sideways at you. You're already excited to see how your friends will react to Steve and Peggy's baby news. Rick is just talking about his work when you suddenly feel Bucky's hand on your thigh and you flinch.

He leans in slightly and whispers in your ear. "Relax, you're ruining our show." You smile and act like he said something funny, and when he kisses your cheek you don't flinch.

“Y/N, when is your presentation?” Wanda asks, after she is done talking about her and Visons weekendtrip to Jersey.

"Tuesday and Wednesday I'll probably get fired."

"So bad?" Nat asks worriedly.

"No, not quite that bad, but it sucks."

"You're welcome to start at my company on Thursday." says Tony. "I still need a new assistant."

"The worst three years of my life." Natasha says and then lowers her voice to sound more like Tony. "Romanoff cancel my meeting tomorrow I have a hangover. Romanoff I don't want to eat with Musk. Romanoff where is my watch?" everyone except Tony laughs.

"Pepper never complained."

"You were in love with her the whole time, of course you were nicer."

"Exactly." Natasha supports your point.

"You worked for Tony?" Rick asks confused. "I thought you were a lawyer."

"Yes, before I even went to university. And I'm not really a lawyer yet. I'm still at university. Speaking of which, Y/N, you won't believe who called the office." Nat works alongside university in a renowned law firm. Bucky got her the job.

"Who?" you ask confused.

"Your granny."

"No!" Embarrassed, you hide your head between your arms on the table. Bucky laughs next to you and strokes your hair, his warm hand touching the skin on your shoulder and strangely, you get goosebumps at the feather-light touch. You quickly sit up again and his hand goes over your back and rests on your thigh again. "What did she want?" you ask, reaching for your second mojito.

"Sue her neighbor again."

"God I really need to call her tomorrow."

"I already explained to her that that doesn't work." Nat says.

"I'm sorry she's annoying you so much."

"Oh, it's not that annoying. Plus, she sends me Christmas cookies every year, so I'm happy to put up with a little complaining."

The evening continues and at some point it's Bucky and you's turn to get new drinks for everyone. As you walk through the crowded bar you notice the alcohol in your veins. When you get to the bar, you lean against the counter, Bucky puts an arm around you. It's not unusual for him to touch you or hug you, but today he's somehow more affectionate than usual. Not that you mind. You don't know that about him at all, not even with his girlfriends that he has every now and then for a few weeks.

"You're putting on a good show." You say after he orders another round of cocktails and tequila for you. After this you better drink some water.

"Do you think he believes us?"

"Why shouldn't he?"

"I don't know, he looks at me strangely all the time."

"You're also his girlfriend's ex."

"That was three years ago." he rolls his eyes.

"I know, but toxic masculinity. And the way you shook his hand wasn't exactly nice either."

Bucky grins. "I couldn't help it." then he rolls his eyes. "He's looking at us."

"Seriously?" you want to turn around to look, but Bucky quickly puts his hand on your cheek, forcing you to look at him.

"Not so obvious." You giggle at your own stupidity.

"Is he still watching?"

"Yes. Ready for a show?" Before you can ask what he means, he leans forward and his lips are already on yours. You're briefly surprised, but then you return the kiss. His hand moves to your back, resting just a little above your ass as he presses you against him. Maybe it's the alcohol, or the fact that you want to put on a good show for Nat, or the fact that Bucky is really good at kissing, but this time it's you who slip your tongue into his mouth. Bucky grins and your tongues start a little battle that he wins. Your arms fold behind his neck and you press your body closer to him. You feel your heart beating a little faster, probably because of the alcohol and because you're making out in the middle of a crowded bar. You've never done that before. Bucky pushes himself towards you, so you have to back away slightly and now your back is pressed against the bar, but it's not uncomfortable. His hand moves a little lower and is now actually on your butt. His body is completely pressed against yours and your nails are carefully scratching his neck. Your lips move perfectly against each other. He's really damn good at kissing. You break away from each other, breathless. Bucky rests his forehead against yours. "That was hot." You laugh briefly.

“Is he still looking?” Bucky turns his head slightly to the side and his gaze goes over to your table.

"No."

"Good." Nevertheless, neither of you makes any effort to put distance between you. Your shoes put you almost at eye level with him. Bucky grins and then kisses you again, your lips only touching for a brief moment, but this kiss somehow feels much more intimate than your previous make-out session. A smile creeps onto your lips without you being able to prevent it. Definitely due to the alcohol. The bartender brings you your drinks and the tequila shots with lemon and salt on a tablet. Bucky takes the drinks and you take the shots, then you go back to your table.

"And I thought you'd disappear home." Tony greets you with a grin.

"You are just jealous." you say.

"He's not jealous, he's horny. How long has Pepper been with her parents in Florida? 1 week or was it 2?" Bucky says. Tony grimaces.

“18 days,” he then answers.

"Ohh you're counting the days you little puppy."

"Shut up Romanoff and drink more." Tony reaches for the shot glasses and puts one in front of everyone. You clink glasses, lick the salt from your hands and then drink the tequilla. You quickly bite into the lemon and are happy that the tequilla taste is gone.

"The toilets are where?" Rick asks, Natasha had probably told him that you were here often.

"At the bar on the right and down the stairs." Vision replies. Rick nods, stands up and heads in that direction.

Your friends' eyes are immediately on you.

“What was that?” asks Wanda.

“Even I almost believed you.”

“Why do you look so good while making out?” says Tony. Bucky kicks him under the table. "That was a compliment."

“We wanted to be convincing.” you answer, blushing and taking a sip from your mojito. The fact that Bucky's hand is on your bare thigh again and his fingers are drawing small circles doesn't really help to remove the blush from your cheeks.

"You were convincing."

"A little too convincing." Tony wiggles his eyebrows. "

"Where is your fantasy goes now hm?." says Vision. Nat and you grimace.

"I dont want to know it."

"Like I'm some disgusting stalker or something. Your new boyfriend was staring like a creep."

"That's not true." Wanda defends Rick, but you can tell by the look in her eyes that she agrees with Tony.

"He's just worried about Bucky. Because we used to be together. And you're not really nice to him either."

"I hardly spoke to him."

"Exactly. And what was that about James?"

"That's my name?"

"No one calls you that."

"I've known the guy for less than two hours and you came to me and said he thinks I'm shit. Do you really think I'm acting out here like I am best friends with him." The two bitch at each other. You reach for Bucky’s hand to calm him down a bit.

"I didn't say he thinks you're shit. Just our friendship."

Bucky presses his lips together and tilts his head slightly. "That's a bad move on his part."

"He's just insecure."

"It's not my problem if he has complexes." then Bucky bites his lip and you know he almost said something mean.

"It's enough." Vision chimes in. "We're here to get to know him. And so far he's quite nice. A good guy Nat." he says in his diplomatic voice. Does he also talk to his students like that?

"Thank you Vis. Also for being so open with him." her gaze goes back to Bucky.

"I've said enough."

"He comes back. Laughs and acts like I said something funny."

"Everything you say is hilarious Tony."

“I love you too Y/N.”

The evening continues with endless conversations and bad jokes. It doesn't even take 10 minutes and Bucky and Nat have forgotten their little bickering. You drink another shot with the others, but when Tony orders the third round you are out and prefer to continue drinking your cocktail. Bucky doesn't leave your side the whole evening, every now and then he presses a kiss on your lips or cheek and when you lean against his shoulder he immediately puts his arm around you and strokes your shoulder with his fingertips. Why is he so good at playing this fake relationship? But actually it doesn't matter. It feels good somehow. You miss it sometimes, the light touches, brief glances and secret whispers. But after your last relationship ended in heartbreak a little over a year ago, you're staying away from men. Wanda and Vision are the first to say goodbye and after a while Tony also starts to yawn now and then. Nat and Rick have separated themselves from you a bit and are making out in the corner, which makes Bucky roll his eyes.

"I'm leaving before those two eat each other over there." says Tony. You giggle silly. Unfortunately, you completely forgot that you actually wanted to drink water and the alcohol went to your head.

"We should going home too." Bucky then says.

"Hey. Nat, Rick." The two break away from their kiss and look at you. "We are heading home now." says Tony.

"Alright. It was nice to see you." says Natasha. “Y/N can I call you tomorrow morning?”

"Yeah, just call when you're ready."

"It was nice meeting you guys." says Rick.

"Yes, I thought so too, hopefully we see you soon again." you answer.

"Yeah, it was nice." Tony also says and nods at him. Bucky doesn’t say anything but helps you get up. Tony leads the way through the crowded bar towards the exit and Bucky walks behind you, his hand is on your back again as he carefully pushes you after Tony. You notice how your feet are starting to hurt in your shoes and you're glad to be home soon. A look at your phone tells you that it's almost 2 A.M. Oops. You didn't want to stay that long. Outside you breathe in the warm night air.

“Taxi or walk?” Bucky asks you, he has his arm around you again and you lean against him.

"Taxi please my feet are hurting. Tony will you drive with us?"

"You live the other way, dear." laughs Tony.

"That's right. But you know, I only can the subway network, not cars."

"We can drive to my place, that's in the same direction." Bucky suggests.

"Uhh, so you take her home with you. Your relationship goes pretty quickly."

"Shut up ass." Bucky says and hits Tony lightly, but he just laughs.

"Let's be honest. You looking good together."

"But we're not together. Just best friends" You said, laughing at Tony's statement.

"Well bro, that must have hurt."

"Dude. Leave it." you don't see his look, but from Tony's reaction you can tell that Bucky is looking at him more angrily than amused. Tony nods and starts typing on his phone, a few minutes later a taxi pulls up. You get in and Bucky says his address, the driver nods and drives off. It's late or early, depending on how you look at it. But New York never sleeps, so there is still traffic on the streets. Although less than during the day. You shift a little in the seat until you're comfortable and listen to Tony and Bucky's conversation. The ride doesn't take long, and when the taxi stops in front of Bucky's building, you rummage through your bag for your wallet.

"I'll cover it." Bucky says, but this time you remain stubborn.

"No." you take the bill out of your pocket and give it to the driver. Then you say goodbye to Tony, and when Bucky raises his hand for a farewell handshake, you notice that he had his hand on your thigh the whole ride again. Why didn't you notice this before? Did you really drink that much? You shake your head and climb out of the taxi. He probably got so used to it all evening that he didn't even notice. The taxi continues to take Tony home. Bucky takes his key out of his pocket and you go inside. The elevator ride to Bucky's floor is silent, but not unpleasant. A few minutes later you are standing in his apartment. You slip off your shoes and flex your feet.

"You see, you didn't have to carry me home." you say.

"Lucky me." Bucky grins at you and then helps you out of your jacket, his fingers running over your shoulders. "Are you tired?" He asks as he hangs up your jacket for you. You throw your bag under the wardrobe.

"A little bit." you answer. Bucky also takes off his jacket and shoes. Then he comes to you and you lean against him. He takes you in his arms and strokes your hair. You breathe in his familiar scent. "Do you think we convinced him?" you ask quietly.

"I guess. What else could we have done?" Bucky laughs briefly. You shrug your shoulders.

"You were really clingy today." Bucky pushes you away a little to look you in the eyes.

"Too much?"

"No." you say quickly. "No, not at all. I thought it was kind of nice. Just unusual."

"Unusual?"

"Well, I don't know you like this at all."

Bucky shrugs and smiles. "But nice?"

"Yes. I sometimes miss the closeness you have when you're in a relationship. Do you know what I mean?"

"Yes, I know what you mean. I thought it was nice too. You kiss well." You start to laugh and want to pull away from the hug, but Bucky holds you by your waist.

"Don´t." he whispers. Suddenly you become aware of the closeness between the two of you. But you're always close? Why do you suddenly have this tingling sensation under your skin? You feel the alcohol in your veins. You smell the alcohol on his breath. And the next moment his lips are on yours again. You don't know which of you kissed whom. You do not care. This kiss is different, there is no one here that you have to act for. There is no one here for you to practice for. His lips on yours are soft, warm and comfortable. Buck’s hand cups your cheek and his thumb gently strokes your cheek. You put your arms around his neck and press yourself against him. His tongue carefully pushes into your mouth. Alcohol, adrenaline and desire rush through your veins. The kiss quickly intensifies, your tongues battle with each other, Bucky wins. His hand moves from your hip back to your ass and when he grabs it you moan. You never realized how much you missed being touched like that. You break away from each other, breathless. You look into his blue eyes, you don't know what you're looking for, but all you see is desire.

"Doll." his voice sounds rough and dark.

"Bucks." You say and he swallows. You don't want to think, you just want him. So you lean forward again, capturing his lips with yours. Your tongue finds his. Bucky moans softly into the kiss and you swear you've never heard such a hot sound in your life. Your whole body burns with desire for him. The next time you break apart, you don't hesitate. You take his hand and pull him towards his bedroom. You know his apartment as well as yours. You know that behind the door a large bedroom and a neatly made soft bed await you. And that's exactly where you want to go. The bedroom door hasn't fully closed behind you when Bucky quickly threw you onto the bed. You giggle as the mattress bounces slightly, but the next moment Bucky is on top of you and his lips are on yours. You scratch his neck lightly with your nails and he moans softly again. His lips move to your neck and he places kisses there. Immediately you have goosebumps all over you, you tilt your head to the side to give it more space and pray that it doesn't leave any red marks. But you actually don't care. His hand slides under your dress. You push your body towards him.

"Take it off." He says breathlessly in your ear and then kisses your earlobe. You sit up slightly and allow your dress to be pulled over your head. You're lying in front of him in just your underwear, but it doesn't make you uncomfortable. Maybe because you drank too much, maybe because Bucky is your Bucky. "You know you're beautiful." He says, running his hands over your body. You notice the blush rising to your cheeks, but at the same time you want him to keep touching you. You want to feel his hands all over your body. You don't answer him but just kiss him again. This time your hands go under his shirt. You feel the muscles of his back under your fingers. You push the t-shirt higher. Bucky removes his lips from yours and pulls the t-shirt over his head. You have to swallow at the sight of his defined body. You know he's ripped. You've seen him without a shirt countless times, but still. God this man is handsome. Your hands move up his torso, caressing his neck and cheeks. Then you smile and pull him back down to you. His lips automatically find yours for an intense kiss. You feel his body against yours, his weight on top of you and as you wrap your legs around his body you feel his hardness against your core through his jeans and you moan again. This is much better than your imagination. But that's not a fantasy. This is reality. His hands are wandering over your breasts in a very real way. Bucky's hands. Your best friend's hands. Through the lust and the alcohol, a thought suddenly arises. This is your best friend! Your Bucky. You're crossing a line and when that happens you can't go back. Fantasy is one thing but reality is another. You feel panic rising in you and your body tense up. You want to push him away and say stop, but you don't have to. Bucky pulled away from you and looked into your eyes. His eyes are worried over your face.

"Y/N? Are you okay?" he asks worriedly now. You shake your head, your throat is dry and you´re searching for the right words, but your brain is still stuck in a lust-drenched rigidity. Bucky sits up completely, pulling away from you and rubbing his face with both hands. Then he takes a deep breath. You finally manage to speak.

"I'm sorry."

"You don't have to apologize for anything."

"We can't Bucky. Oh shit." you pull your legs up to your body, trying to hide your half-naked body from him. Suddenly you feel uncomfortable. You feel tears welling up in your eyes. You're totally confused. Your head can't keep up with your feelings.

"Take it easy. Take a deep breath." His vocie is soft, but worried. You do as he says and then look back at him. You feel guilty and confused. Bucky gets up from the bed, turns to his closet and takes out one of his t-shirts. “Would you like to get dressed?” You nod. He hands you the t-shirt and you pull it over your head. The familiar smell of his detergent and the soft fabric on your skin calm you and you can finally think clearly again.

"I'm sorry." Bucky suddenly says now and you're confused again.

"What?"

"I'm sorry for harassing you. You're drunk and I took advantage of it. I thought you wanted it too."

"I wanted it! Bucky. No! Don't think like that. You didn't take advantage of me. I could say the same thing, you're drunk too." You are silent for a moment.

"Are you all right?" he asks, you can't quite interpret his look, he looks kind of sad, but that doesn't really fit.

"Yes, you?"

"Yes." he tries a smile, but it's a little crooked.

"It might be better if we go to sleep." you suggest. The situation makes you terribly uncomfortable. God, what have you done?

"Yeah, probably. Should I sleep on the couch?"

"Why? Do you want to sleep on the couch?" you've slept next to each other a thousand times. At some point you even developed the habit of cuddling a little before going to sleep.

"No. I just thought in case you needed some distance."

"I never need distance from you. If you want, you can sleep in the bed. Or I can sleep on the couch if you want." It's a strange atmosphere between the two of you, you both want to please the other without either of you really knowing what you want. Bucky sighs, slips out of his jeans and then puts on a fresh t-shirt. Meanwhile, you lie down under the blanket and are careful not to watch him change. Bucky slides into bed next to you.

"Sleep well, doll."

"Sleep well Bucks." Bucky presses the remote control on the nightstand and the light goes off. You lie in the dark and stare at the ceiling. Your thoughts revolve around the whole evening. About your kisses, about the touches. You felt good. You were happy. And it was nice. But that's how you always feel when you're with Bucky. Why is it so different this time? Because you kissed? But that was just for Natasha. That meant nothing. You almost slept with each other. But that's only because you've been making out all evening. Of course, this doesn't leave you unscathed. And you're drunk. You suppress a sigh and close your eyes. Tomorrow everything will be the same as before. Everything will be exactly the same as always! You fall asleep with this thought.

When you wake up, the bed next to you is empty. You turn onto your stomach, bury your face in the pillows and take a deep breath. You don't really feel rested, and one look at the alarm clock on the bedside table tells you why. It's not even 10 A.M. Why is Bucky already awake? You sit up and listen into the apartment, maybe he's taking a shower or something. But instead of the sound of water, you hear quiet voices. Bucky is talking to someone. Steve! You get out of bed faster than you thought you would.

"Bucky, do you really think this is a good idea?" You can hear the two of them talking muffled through the closed door.

"We help Natasha."

"Of course. You're so helpful and not at all selfish." Steve sounds sarcastic. But maybe you're just imagining it, after all you can only hear him faintly through the door. You quickly slip on one of Bucky’s sweaters. It is long enough to reach over your butt so you don't end up only in your underwear in front of Steve and then come out of the bedroom.

"Morning." You say as you step into the kitchen.

"Good morning Doll."

“Good morning Y/N.”

"Morning Steve, what are you doing here?"

"I brought coffee over. My run goes through Buckys street. I didn't know you were here otherwise I would have brought you one too."

"It's fine. Not like Bucks doesn't have a portafilter machine." You turn to the coffee machine and press the button so that the grinder starts grinding the beans.

“You are allowed to touch the holy coffee machine?”

"This is not a coffee machine, this...

"Is an Italian portafilter machine. We know." You and Steve interrupt Bucky at the same time. Bucky sighs but has to suppress a laugh.

"By the way, Tony filmed your smooch yesterday." Steve taps on his phone and the next moment you see you and Bucky making out at the bar. You feel yourself blushing.

"How childish."

"I think we look hot." Bucky says, pushing you by your hip to the sideand, taking the portafilter from your hand to clamp it into the machine and fill it with the freshly ground coffee. You roll your eyes.

"What's Rick like?" Steve then asks to change the subject. Bucky groans and rolls his eyes.

"Annoying."

"Nonsense. He's okay, I think."

"You think?"

"It was one evening and Nat likes him." the next moment your cell phone rings, Natasha. "Creepy." you accept the video call and in the next moment her face appears on your screen. "Good morning Nat." You say, leaning against the kitchen counter while Bucky finishes making your coffee and then fills your cup with oat milk. You know he always buys them especially for you and that makes you smile. God he's just the best.

"Good morning Y/N. I just got home."

"I am not that far yet." you turn the screen once so Nat can see Steve and Bucky, both of them giving her a quick wave. Then you turn the screen over again.

"How surprising." she says without meaning it. " But good I wanted to thank both of you. You really put on a good show yesterday."

“Sure thing, Nat.”

"It wasn't that bad." you kick at Bucky, but he pulls his leg away so you only hit the air.

"You can tell Rick in two weeks that we broke up." you then say back towards the phone.

"About that. He suggested we meet again on Wednesday for dinner. Like a double date." You roll your eyes.

"Nat!"

"I know, but I didn't know how to say no without lying. I don't want to lie to him."

"You should have thought about that beforehand." Steve says now. You give him a dirty look, it's none of his business.

“So Wednesday is fine?” You swipe away from the phone call to look at your calendar, but so far there's nothing scheduled for Wednesday other than work. "For me, yes." Bucky also looks at his cell phone calendar and then nods. "For Bucky too."

"Okay perfect. We were going to this new Italian place around the corner from me."

“That super fancy restaurant?” you ask.

"Yes, exactly." You sigh. Super fancy also means super expensive. A visit there would probably use up your entire going out budget for the month.

"Okay. See you Wednesday then." you say anyway. "Until Wednesday. And thank you again. I really owe you one. Love you."

"Love you. Bye Nat."

"Bye." Bucky and Steve call and than you end the call.

"I invite you, of course." Can Bucky read your mind? You blush slightly, but then nod.

"Thanks."

"Not for that, Doll." You don't actually earn less, but a lot of it goes towards renting your apartment. Natascha lives in one of her parents' apartments, so she doesn't pay rent and her parents also cover her tuition fees. Bucky earns more than you anyway and none of you can come close to Tony. It's not embarrassing that you don't have as much money as your friends, it's just annoying sometimes. You take a sip of your coffee. Buckys machine really is a thousand times better than that old thing in your kitchen.

"So guys. I have to go again. Peggy is waiting at home." Steve pushes his chair back and stands up. "It was nice to see you Y/N. Next time we'll be there again so we can chat longer."

"It was nice to see you too Steve. Love to Peggy."

"I will tell her." He says goodbye to Bucky with their signature handshake and then disappears from the apartment. You're alone with Bucky, you're sober and you suddenly remember your make out session in his bed you had yesterday. Damned. How embarrassing.

"I'm going to take a shower and then be on my way, don't want to bother you any more."

"You don't bother me, Doll. Ever." Bucky says. You try a smile, put down your almost full cup and escape to the bathroom. Maybe you can walk away from this awkward conversation. You're never embarrassed in front of Bucky, he's your best friend. You go through the ups and downs of your life with him, but yesterday. That was different and you don't want to think about it. Damn you were about to fuck him. You briefly go into the bedroom and open the wardrobe. You spend the night here so often that you have your own clothes here, you quickly get some fresh clothes and then disappear to the bathroom. As the hot water flows over your body, you take a deep breath. You try to sort out your thoughts. Everything was good between you right now. It wasn't strange. Everything as always. Or was it just because Steve was there? Should you address the situation yesterday? Or just stay silent and pretend everything is fine? Your mind wanders back to last night, to the feeling of his hands on your body. You quickly shake your head. You really can't use that now. You finish your shower, dry yourself off and change into your fresh clothes. You wrap your hair in a towel and as you step out of the bathroom, Bucky is standing directly in front of you. He was waiting for you.

“I know you Y/N and I know you want to run away, but we need to talk about yesterday.” You swallow. Damned! Were you drunk enough to pretend you didn't remember? No, unfortunately not. "Kitchen. There's breakfast." He says, nodding his head in that direction. You look at the front door, maybe you should just run. You realize how ridiculous this idea is and you admit defeat. You slowly follow him into the kitchen and sit at the table where Bucky has prepared breakfast. You grab a roll and Bucky gives you a fresh coffee. Then he sits down opposite to you. "So yesterday..." he begins, his voice sounds emotionless. You know that voice, that's his working voice. And you know he has a speech prepared. But you don't want to hear it. Everything in you is now reluctant to hear these prepared words. So you interrupt him.

"I think we should just forget about it. We were drunk, made out all night, so it's clear that we're kind of horny." He furrows his eyebrows, you can see that he doesn't like that you interrupted him, but he nods.

"If you want it that way." Now you're confused. You don't like the sentence, something is strange. But you can't quite put your finger on it.

"What do you want?"

Bucky opens his mouth, but he doesn't say anything. He takes a deep breath, looks at his plate and when he looks up again he smiles at you. But you know him too well. That's not his normal smile. It seems forced.

"Let's forget it." he then replies. Even though it was your idea, somewhere deep inside you are hurt. You quickly push the feeling away. You just want it to be like it used to be. It should be like yesterday morning. Before you made out.

"Good." you agree. The rest of breakfast passes in silence. Then you and Bucky clean up the kitchen. Your goodbye is kind of stiff and as you head home you still feel like something isn't right. You would like to call Natasha. She is your best friend. Normally you would call her now and talk to her about every second of last night. But Bucky is her ex-boyfriend. Yes, it was a long time ago. Yes, they're both obviously over it. Still, something inside you is resisting. You don't call her.

You don't hear from Bucky all weekend. That's not normal. But you don't call him either. Did you really ruin your friendship? God, what have you done? You just wanted to help Natasha. You spend the whole Sunday thinking about whether you should call her or not. But you don't. You know that Sundays are completely reserved for her studying and you don't want to disturb her. You're also embarrassed by the situation. Did you handle it wrong? Should you have listened to Bucky's speech? What is he really thinking? For the first time in almost three years, you feel like you don’t know what Bucky is really thinking. You don't feel like doing anything this Sunday. Bored, you lie on your sofa and stare at the switched off television. You tried to watch something, but it didn't interest you. You aren´t hungry all day, so you don´t eat anything ecept an slice of bread. Are you so old that a hangover lasts two days? Well actually you didn't drink enough to even have a hangover. You didn't even have a headache yesterday. You keep reaching for your phone, thinking about calling Bucky. But you don´t. You miss him. It feels like you had an argument. But you don't have. Or? Why can't you just call him? Because you're afraid it's weird. But it's weird already. God. What have you done? On Sunday evening, a few tears roll down your cheek before you fall asleep.

Monday morning comes too quickly and when your alarm goes off you briefly consider if you should call in sick. But that doesn't work. You still have way too much to do. So you get up, get dressed and head to work. You're just slumping into your office chair when your phone beeps. Bucky wrote you a message. Your stomach tightens. What's that supposed to mean? This is your best friend! Pull yourself together. You pick up your phone and open the message. "Call later? Work until 5." "Gladly." You answer, but you don't know what you want to say to him. What does he want? Since when has he been asking for phone calls? Usually he just calls. God you need to talk to someone. But you're so embarrassed by the whole situation. You've long since ruled out talking to Natasha about it. Wanda? No, she wouldn't really have any good advice for you. Wanda has fallen in love with every guy she has kissed so far. She loves the dream of true love. And with Vision she lives out this dream. Peggy? No, she's more Bucky's friend than yours. You sigh as you realize your last option. Tony. You need more friends. Nevertheless, you reach for your cell phone and call him.

"What gives me the honor?" he answers it after a short moment.

“Do you have anything planned during your lunch break?”

"My whole life is a lunch break." You already regret calling him and sigh. Tony must have heard you because his voice suddenly becomes serious. "What's up?"

"I have something to discuss."

"And why not with Nat?"

"Not an option."

"You're making me really curious. So lunch break. I'll pick you up at your office."

"Thanks Tony."

"See you later." After the phone call, you try to concentrate on your work but things are going slowly. You're happy when Tony writes you a message and says he's standing in front of the building. You quickly grab your things and your jacket, say goodbye to your colleagues for your break and go to the elevator. Tony knows well not to come inside your office. People treat you differently once they know you're friends with him. You noticed that clearly at your last job. As you leave the building, Tony is standing in front of you with a to-go box from his favorite Italian restaurant. You walk a little way to the nearby park, sit down at a fountain and start eating.

"So why did you want to talk so badly?" he asks curiously.

"It's because of Bucky."

"What about Bucky?"

"We kissed."

"I know. I filmed it."

"No. I mean after. In his apartment. In his bedroom. Half naked." Tony starts laughing.

“You guys fucked?”

"No! Almost, then we stopped and it's been weird ever since."

"Have you talked about it?"

"Just briefly. He had prepared a speech but I didn't let him finish and then we said let's forget it, everything is as usual. But I haven't heard from him since then, until this morning. He wants to call later."

Tony sighs and thinks a moment. “Did you stop or did he?”

"I. Why?"

"Then it's quite clear. Y/N. If a beautiful woman like you pushed me off the edge of the bed, I would also have a bruised ego."

“You think this is an ego thing?”

"I am very sure." You are relieved. So you haven't lost your friendship with him after all. "He'll probably only need a few days and then everything will be as before. Don't worry so much."

"Easier said than done. You know I'm an overthinker."

"And a people pleaser."

"Thanks." You say, rolling your eyes. Tony winks at you.

"How was it?"

"What?"

"Your almost fuck of course."

"Tony!" You say, slapping his arm.

"What? You wanted my advice and I just want my fair reward."

“Oh, your advice now comes with conditions?”

"Always have."

"And you wonder why no one asks you for advice. Oh yes, that was because of your character." Tony looks at you in shock for a moment and then starts laughing out loud.

"Good one. I'm proud." You rolled your eyes again. "So do I get the spicy details now or not?"

"No."

"It was worth a try." he then laughs.

"I hope everything goes well on the phone call." you then say and chew on your noodles.

"I'm sure. Otherwise, sit down together at the weekend and discuss everything calmly. Making out isn't the end of the world."

"Well we have to have everything sorted out by Wednesday at the latest."

"What's on Wednesday?"

"A fake double date with Nat and Rick."

Tony rolls his eyes. "I can't stand the guy."

"You just don't like him because he's not Bruce."

"That's not true!" Tony's look turns sad and you know he's thinking about his old lab partner. But he was so much more than that. Tony's best friend, Natasha's first love. You shake your head. You don't want to think about what happened to him, neither of you saw it coming. From one day to the next he was gone, and everything was different. You regret saying his name. Tony takes a deep breath.

"This is far too serious for me." You reach for his hand and try an encouraging smile. Tears gather in Tony's eyes, but he quickly blinks them away. "I miss him."

"I miss him too." You say. Tony takes a few deep breaths and then manages to smile again. He removes his hand from yours and claps his hands.

"You have to go back to the office." he then changes the subject.

"Are you sure?" Now you don't want to leave him alone.

"Yeah. I'll be fine. But I want an update tonight, your drama is much better than mine." You roll your eyes slightly, but you're glad that his low mood has been averted.

"You will get it." you say, getting up and throwing the empty food box into the nearest trash.

"Don't worry so much. Everything will be fine. Trust me, I'm a genius."

"But that doesn't mean you can see the future."

"Right, I can't do that yet. But I'm a man, just like James. Give him a little time until he realizes that his ego is getting in his way and everything is as usual." You want to believe him. And why should he be wrong?

"Thanks Tony. That really helped me."

"You´re welcome." He says, smiling genuinely at you. You hug each other goodbye and you head back to the office. After the conversation you can concentrate much better, you even manage to prepare everything for your project presentation. And that without overtime. You come home on time and put on comfortable clothes. You've just sat down on the couch with a cup of coffee when your cell phone rings. Bucky. You quickly answer your cell phone. "Hello."

"Hello." and then you both remain silent. Tears come to your eyes, maybe everything won't be okay after all. You hear Bucky take a deep breath. "I'm sorry. This is weird. It's weird between us." he speaks faster than you are used to from him.

"Yes, it is."

"I didn't want it like that. Never. And I know that in my bedroom was shit and that we didn't talk properly was shit too. I fucked up."

"No. When someone screwed up than it is me. I didn't let you finish on Saturday and left as soon as I could. I know it's only Monday but I miss you Bucks. It's so unusual for me not to talk to you for so long."

"It's unusual for me too. I miss you too." A ring at the front door makes you jump. "Will you open the door for me?" You quickly jump up from the sofa and open the door for him. You're so relieved to see him that you fall straight into his arms. You know that the last time you saw each other was only two days ago and that this dependence on your best friend is neither normal nor healthy, but you don't care about that at this moment. You're just happy to be able to hold him in your arms again. This time it doesn't feel strange, it feels right. You let him into your apartment and he throws keys and wallet into the small bowl on the dresser next to your door. Everything as usually. Then he puts his jacket aside and you sit together on your sofa.

"You wanted to say more to Saturday right?" you finally manage to gather enough courage to face the situation.

"Yeah, I thought about something before Steve came."

“Do you still want to say it now?” Bucky looks at you for a while, he seems to be thinking. Then he begins to speak.

"I wanted to say that I don't want our friendship to be affected by this little make out session. That nothing is as important to me as our friendship." he stops, takes a deep breath and looks around the room. But then his eyes find yours again, his look is serious. "But that's a lie." A hot burning sensation forms in your stomach. What? Before you can say anything, before you can even understand what he said, he's already talking again. "It's a lie Y/N. I've known this for a while. I don't know how many times I've talked to Steve about it. It's probably getting on his nerves terribly. But whatever, that's not the topic right now. I I really wanted to come here and tell you that everything is as usual but I can't. I don't want to. I don't want to keep lying. Shit. Kissing you, holding you in my arms, being allowed to touch you in front of everyone, This is all I've ever wanted. You're all I've ever wanted. I only had this for one evening but I can't go back. I'm driving myself crazy to think that none of this was real on your part. I love you. I love you for so long. I know you don't feel that way but I can't carry on like this. I'm sorry." You sit on your sofa and stare at him in shock. Did he really just say that? Your thoughts start racing. Everything has changed since the weekend and yet everything is somehow the same. You think about how you feel being around Bucky. Nobody makes you feel so comfortable. With him you can be completely you. You enjoy the closeness you have with him. Every hug. Every time you watch a movie together and cuddle. Every time you fall asleep in his arms. You can talk to him about anything. You can talk about the same thing a thousand times and he wouldn't complain. When you're with him you don't have to pretend. He saw you at your lowest points and helped you out. You saw him at his lowest points and built him back up. You always thought he was your soulmate, but platonic. Maybe your relationship isn't as platonic as you thought. You didn't see him for 2 days, thought you had lost him and felt like your whole world had collapsed. Have you ever felt that way about one of your friends? No of course not. You almost laughed at your own stupidity. How could you not realize that you love him? You lean in and place your lips on his. The feeling is so strange and at the same time so familiar. Bucky kisses you for a moment and then pulls away.

"Don't please. Don't do this because you think you have to." he swallows a few times, tears glistening in his eyes.

"I love you." You say. Now it's him who looks at you in shock.

"As your best friend?" he then asks uncertainly. Uncertain. Also a word that you wouldn't have associated with Bucky until today.

"No. I thought so. I thought you were my best friend. But that's not true. You're so much more. I love you Bucky and I'm sorry. I'm sorry I didn't realize it sooner. I'm sorry we had to go through that drama. I'm sorry it took a fucking fake relationship for me to understand that I love you." you laugh and at the same time tears stream down your cheeks. How could you be so stupid? Now it's Bucky who leans in and kisses you. You wrap your arms around him, close your eyes and enjoy the kiss. He starts to laugh in the kiss and you laugh too.

"We're really stupid." He says, stroking your cheek.

"Yes." you take his hand and intertwine your fingers with his. Your whole body is flooded with happiness. “So no more fake relationships?”

"No. No more fake." he kisses you again and then pulls you onto his lap in one quick movement. You put your arms around his neck and hug him.

"I love you." you repeat, how could you ever not say it to him?

"I love you."

Bucky stays with you, but you don´t get any further than the couch. You're too busy making out and laughing at your own stupidity.

"Steve will be happy, now I won't bother him anymore."

"I should probably apologize to him." You say while scratching his neck. Bucky is laying across your couch with his head in your lap. You've been like this thousands of times, but this time it's different. It's much better.

"I could have said something sooner."

"Why didn `t you?"

"I was afraid of losing you. I felt like a schoolboy falling in love for the first time. At first I thought it was just a phase, but it became more and more. When we kissed in the kitchen on Friday, I almost lock you up here and never let you out again." You start laughing and roll your eyes.

"Charming."

"Always." Your phone rings and you both jump. To be honest, you've forgotten that the world outside your apartment still exists. Bucky turns his head to the side to see who is calling you. "Why is Tony calling you so late?" He sits up and looks at you from the side, there is something in his gaze that you don't yet know. Jealousy.

"Why is my friendship with Tony suddenly a problem?" you ask confused, you've never seen him jealous before.

"It´s not " he says quickly. "I was just wondering why he was calling you so late."

"Are you jealous?"

"Yes." he says openly. "I know I shouldn't, but I am."

"You've never been jealous before."

"I was jealous of every man near you. I just didn't let you see it." he confesses to you.

“Then why now?” you ask, you're not mad at him because he's jealous. It flatters you a little to be honest.

"Because you're mine now." he says smiling. You grinned at him, leaned in and kissed him. Your cell phone stops ringing.

"I went on a lunch break today and asked him for advice because of you. I was afraid I would have destroyed our friendship. But he said you only had a scratch ego because I didn´t sleep with you and everything will be back to normal in a few days."

"He was wrong."

"Yes he was. He wants an update from our phone call." You have to laugh at the thought of how everything has changed in just a few hours, everything has become so much better.

"Then call him back." grins Bucky. You pick up your phone from the table and press call back. The next moment Tony's face appears on your phone screen.

“And was I right or was I right?” he asks into the phone without greeting. "Has Mr. Ego recovered?" Before you can answer, Bucky slides into the Screen.

"Mr. Ego?" Tony winces.

"Dude. You know I hate jump scares." You start laughing again. “What are you doing at Y/N’s house so late?” Why does he have to be so nosy? You and Bucky exchange a quick look. And you know you think the same thing. Why lie? Why keep something that feels so beautiful and so right secret?

"I'm spending time with my girlfriend." Bucky replies.

"GIRLFRIEND?" Tony screams into the phone and you hold the phone away. You didn't expect such a sudden outburst of emotions from him.

"Yep." you say. Tony starts laughing uproariously.

"I didn't expect that."

"Always good for a surprise."

"I'm happy for you and I said you look good together. "

"Thanks Tony."

"Then I won't bother you any further."

"We haven't told anyone else yet." You say quickly before Tony tells everyone the news.

"I'm quiet, don't worry, lovebirds."

*

Tuesday morning you would like to call in sick again, but this time for a different reason. Bucky kisses your cheeks as light as a feather, his beard tickles slightly and his hands stroke your hips under your t-shirt. Or more likely under one of his old t-shirts that you wear to sleep. "I have to get up and take a shower. Otherwise I'll be late." you laugh but kiss him again. You don't want to get up. You would much rather spend the whole day here in bed with him.

"Then be late."

"Then I'll be fired."

"Doesn't matter." his lips find your neck and he kisses you. You bite your lip to keep from moaning. You gather all your self-control and push him away from you.

"I have to work." He grimaces, sighs, and then rolls off of you.

"You're right as always." You quickly climb out of the soft bed before you change your mind and head towards the bathroom. You definitely need a shower after last night. A look at the clock tells you that you have still enough time. Thank god.

"Are you coming?" you call into the bedroom.

"What?"

"Showering." You hear him jump out of bed and the next moment he's in the bathroom with you. His lips on yours again. You start to laugh, but when his hands go under your sleep shorts you moan.

*

You stand in front of your closet and tilt your head to the side. Then you look back at the picture Natasha sent you of her outfit and back into your closet. You don't quite have the right outfit, so you'll be a little underdressed. You get dressed, do your make-up and your hair. Just as you're done, the doorbell rings. A happy smile spreads across your face and your heart flutters. Bucky. You quickly open the door.

"You look great." You say, he is wearing a dark shirt and pants. But he's rolled up his sleeves and you have to swallow when you look at his muscular underarms. When did you become a horny teenager?

"That's my text Doll." He says and kisses you. "Here for you." he pulls out a bouquet of flowers from behind his back. You beam at him.

"Thanks. That wouldn't have been necessary."

"It's our first real date. Unfortunately we have to spend it with Rick, but still." You hit him on the upper arm. He and Tony could really open a we-hate-rick club. And that even though they don´t really know him. He kisses your cheek. You take the flowers and look for a vase in the kitchen. You fill it with water and place the flowers on the table in the living room so that they get enough light. Then you turn in a circle in front of Bucky so he can see you from all sides.

"And are you going out with me like that?" He grabs your hips and pulls you close.

"I would love to stay here with you like this." You start laughing, biting your bottom lip and looking at him with wide eyes.

"And then?"

"Stop it." he pushes you away from him, laughing. "But something is missing." he then says seriously again. You turn to the mirror and examine your outfit and make-up. Does he not like it? Maybe other shoes? Or another make-up? "I can hear you thinking." you turn back to Bucky, he is standing in front of you with a mischievous grin. "That's missing." He pulls out of his trouser pocket a silver chain set with small sparkling stones.

"Oh Bucks. No. I can't accept that." you say. You don't want him to give you anything. He's already taking you to an overly expensive restaurant today.

"Yes you can." He comes behind you and pushes your hair to the side to put the necklace on you. His hands then stroke your bare shoulders and he presses a kiss to your shoulder blade.

"It is too much."

"It's not. Otherwise, consider it a gift for your promotion." You start laughing.

“I didn’t get promoted.” Your presentation went really well yesterday and your boss put you in charge of the project. Normally you are only responsible for the preparation and then have to hand everything over. This is a great opportunity for you. Of course Bucky was the first person you called afterwards.

“You get more money?”

"Correct."

"And more responsibility?"

"Yes."

"Sounds like a promotion to me."

"But my job title remains the same."

"Formalities." You sigh but smile at him. You are so full of happiness that you can't believe it yourself.

"Thanks Bucky. For the flowers, for the necklace. For you. Just thank you."

"You don't have to thank Y/N. You make me so happy."

"You make me happy." You kiss him and fold your arms behind his neck. Bucky smiles against your lips. Then he breaks away from you.

"Come on now, Doll. Otherwise we'll be late."

"You're right." You say, turning around and reaching for your bag. Bucky slaps your ass lightly in the next moment. You gasp in mock outrage. "Stop it." He clicks his tongue and grins.

"Don't pretend you didn´t like it." You roll your eyes, laugh, and then head for the door. How grown up. You meet Nat and Rick in front of the restaurant, so Bucky came to you with his car, he parked right in front of your apartment and of course he has a parking ticket stuck to the windshield. He takes it off as he walks around the car to open the door for you. You collapse into the comfortable leather seat and Bucky throws the ticket to the others.

"At some point they'll take away your driver's license."

"Nonsense. I pay my traffic tickets diligently." You roll your eyes and he starts the engine. "And even if I do, you can drive me around."

"I don't have a driver's license." You've lived in New York your whole life. So why get a driving license?

"I know." he merges into the traffic and you arrive at the restaurant on time. You reach for the door handle, but Bucky lightly pecks your side. "Wait." He gets out, comes around the car and opens the door for you.

"Gentleman."

"Always. I'm just the perfect boyfriend." He really is. You started to worry if things would be different between you now, but they aren't. He's still your Bucky except he's also your boyfriend. Bucky hands the key to the valet-parking and you look down the street to see where Nat and Rick are. You feel yourself getting nervous. You haven't told Nat about your relationship with Bucky. You've only been together for three days. Still, something like that is actually something you tell her straight away. But he is still her ex-boyfriend. It seems forbidden to you. Your best friend's ex-boyfriend is normally absolutely taboo. You're sure she won't be mad but still. It makes you nervous. Bucky places a hand on your back. "What is it?"

"I didn't tell Nat." He knows exactly what you mean, his eyebrows furrowing.

"Because you're unsure if it'll hold?"

"No!" you say quickly. "No, not at all. It's just you're her ex." Bucky rolls his eyes.

“Hardly worth mentioning.”

"I know, I know. Still, I have no idea why I tink like that. I want to tell her. But I haven't had the chance yet. And now I can´t because Rick is with us. I'll tell her tomorrow."

"Take all the time you need, Doll." he kisses your cheek and smiles. Then you see Natasha and Rick come around the next corner. Your best friend looks stunningly beautiful as always. But her face looks a little tense. She doesn't hold Rick's hand either. The two walk stiffly next to each other. "Looks like a crisis." A mean grin appears on Bucky's face. You hit him lightly in the stomach with your elbow. "Ouch."

"That didn't hurt."

"It could have ."

“But it didn’t.” you suppress a grin.

"I'm sorry you had to wait." Natasha greets you and pulls you into a tight hug. Then she hugs Bucky too while you greet Rick with a smile and a handshake. Bucky just nods at him.

"No problem, we just arrived." you say. You go inside the restaurant and, thanks to your reservation, you are taken straight to a table. Bucky pulls the chair back for you and you grin at him as he sits down next to you. He immediately grabs your hand and you interlace your fingers together. Natasha and Rick sit across from you and the waitress brings the menus. You notice that there are no prices on your menu and you're kind of glad that you don't know how much this costs.

"How was your presentation?" Nat asks.

"Good. Really good. I can lead the project until the end." you answer her, feeling a little proud of yourself.

"That's great Y/N. I'm so happy for you."

"Thanks." Natasha smiles at you, suddenly her eyes go to your neck. Did Bucky leave a hickey? No he didn't. You checked as you put on your dress. The necklace. Nat knows all your jewelry so she knows it's new. But she doesn't say anything. You continue to talk. It's much quieter in the restaurant than in the bar on the weekend, so you get to know Rick a little better. With each of his answers, Bucky seems to likes him less and you also find it a little difficult to find similarities between him and Nat. He has other hobbies, isn't interested in environmental protection like Natasha is, and he is showing off a little too much for your taste. But Natasha must like him, not you. You notice a tense atmosphere between Nat and Rick, but maybe you're just imagining it. Before dessert you excuse yourself to the toilet.

"I'm coming with you." says Natasha. Bucky gives you both a pleading look. You press a kiss to his cheek.

"Be nice." you whisper silently.

"A new necklace?" Natasha asks when you reach the toilets.

"Yes from Bucks."

"He gives you jewelry?" she asks, surprised and confused.

"Yes, because my presentation went so well." She doesn't believe you. Of course not. You don't believe yourself. You desperately want to tell her, but now is neither the right time nor the right place. You both quickly go to the toilets. "What about you and Rick?" you ask as you wash your hands. Nat rolls his eyes.

"So obvious?"

"Yes."

"We argue a bit. But that's normal." She tells herself, you notice that immediately.

"Yes, it is." you still agree with her. You wish her that she can finally be happy again. And arguments in a relationship are normal!

"What do you think of him?"

"He's nice. I've spoken to him a bit more now than I did at the weekend."

“Just nice?”

"Well, yes. Very nice. But it is only important what you think." You go back to your table, from far away you see Bucky and Rick having a staring contest. Bucky doesn't even blink.

"Bucky hates him." Natasha says and sights.

"He doesn't know him."

"And he doesn't try to get to know him." You don't know what to say because she's right so you just sigh. You come back to the table and you immediately reach for Bucky’s hand again. He smiles, but doesn't take his eyes off Rick. How grown up. You feel Natasha kick Bucky under the table. He doesn't flinch, but he looks over at her and smiles.

"Who wants dessert?" he asks without making a face and waves the waiter over. Natasha's eyes cast daggers at him. You bite your cheek to suppress a laugh.

You complete the last half hour of the dinner and as you sit in Bucky's passenger seat you breathe a sigh of relief. Dinner was tiring. Rick is exhausting.

"I'll be honest, I hate him." Bucky says and puts on his turn signal. You sigh.

"He won't become my favorite person." you half agree with him. The car starts moving and you press the button to roll down the window. The warm car air mixes with the even warmer city air and you blow a strand of hair from your forehead. Bucky looks at you and smiles.

"You're beautiful."

"Look at the street." You say, but his compliment gives butterflies in your stomach and makes you blush.

"To me or do you want to go home?" he asks.

"To you." you answer him. "Or do you want an evening alone?"

"I don't know if I'll ever want an evening to myself again when the alternative is an evening with you."

*

The next afternoon you stand nervously outside Natasha's lecture hall. It's her last one for the day, you know that. You got off work early today, went to university and bought bad coffee for you and Nat at the street stand. You definitely have to tell her today. The necklace made her suspicious, you know that and you want to tell her. Why should you be afraid of her reaction? You know yourself that it is irrational. The doors open and a bunch of students stream outside. You recognize Natasha's red head of hair straight away and start waving. When she sees you she is surprised. You didn't tell her you were coming to pick her up. She comes to you and you hug.

"Hey Y/N. What are you doing here?" she asks as you hand her the coffee, which is probably cold by now.

"Picking you up." You leave the building. Natasha is skeptical, you can tell by her look.

"What's bothering you?" you ask as you make your way towards her apartment.

"What makes you think something is bothering me?" you ask.

"You were a bit strange at dinner and now you're picking me up from university?" You sigh. Why does she know you so well?

"Something happened." Natasha looks at you worried. "On Friday." you don't really know how to start. You can't find the right words. You sigh. There's no point in talking around it. "On Friday night when I was at Bucky's we kissed and almost slept with eachother." Natasha furrows her eyebrows and then starts to laugh.

"God Y/N, you look like you just told me that my grandma died. It's all good. Did you think I was mad? Not because of that. Bucky and I broke up years ago." You're relieved to hear that, but you haven't said everything yet. "If you want to sleep with him then go for it. From what I remember he's really good." Nat puts an arm around your shoulder and grins at you from the side.

"I know." She stumbles in her movement.

"Y/N. Tell me the whole story! Now." she demands. Now you don't know if she's mad or not. Her face reveals nothing. You sigh and tear off the patch.

"We talked about it briefly on Saturday and I said I wanted to forget it. Bucky was weird and we didn't talk at all on Sunday. I wanted to call you but I know you're studying on Sunday and I was so embarrassed and scared that you're mad because he's your ex.."

"If you call him my ex-boyfriend again I'll scream. I'm over it, he's over it. We're friends!" She interrupts and you bite your lip.

"I'm sorry. I wanted to tell you."

"You're always apologizing for something. But you haven't said for what yet."

"Yeah, I know. I... I.... Oh fuck it. Bucky came over on Monday and confessed to me that he loves me and then I realized that I love him too and now we're together. A real couple. A real relationship." you talk so fast that you're gasping for air by the time you finish. Nat just looks at you for a moment. Fear rises within you. Is she angry after all?

"Yes. Oh my God. How could I be so blind. Of course."

"What ?" you are completely confused. Natasha pulls you into a tight hug. She doesn't care that you're standing in the middle of the sidewalk and people are bumping into you and cursing at you.

"I was thinking. How could I not notice. You're both my best friends and I didn't realize you were into each other. I feel stupid."

"Well, I didn't notice it myself." You say, shrugging your shoulders. "I just thought Bucky and I were really good friends." Natasha starts laughing and you join in. "You are not mad?"

"No. Not at all. I'm happy for you. And for him. Really."

"Thanks Nat. I was really scared." Nat tilts his head slightly and sighs.

"I'm always your best friend. No matter what happens." You smile at her. "Come on, we'll be at my place in a moment and then I want to hear every little detail about this love confession. It must have been really good." You laugh briefly and then let her drag you along to her apartment.

*

Natascha's message comes on Friday afternoon as you are leaving your office and looking forward to a relaxing weekend. You're planning on going to your grandma's with Bucky tomorrow morning. Also because, unlike you, he has a car and you don't have to take the train. And of course because you want to introduce him to your grandma as your new boyfriend. Your mother would be there too. Natasha's message changes your plans. At least when it comes to leaving early. "Girls' night. Today I have vodka and ice cream. Nothing else." You furrow your eyebrows and know that something must have happened. Voda and ice cream is Nat's recipe for broken hearts. You quickly answer her that you will be with her in 2 hours. Then you dial Bucky's number.

"Hey doll."

"Hey Bucks. I have to cancel our DVD night."

"What happened?" he asks, slightly worried.

"Nat demanded a girls' night .An ice cream with vodka problem."

" Sounds serious."

"I don't know yet. Is that okay with you?"

"Of course, totally fine. We've seen each other every evening this week, now it´s Nat's turn. Should I pick you up tomorrow morning and we'll drive straight to your grandma's?"

"Sounds perfect. Thanks Bucky, you're the best."

"I know. Have a nice evening. I love you."

"I love you." The words come so easily from your lips that you wonder how you couldn't have realized that you love him. God you are so stupid. You hang up and head home. There you put on some comfortable clothes, pack a few things and head straight back to Natashas apartment. When you arrive, Peggy opens the door for you. You look at her surprised and pleased.

"You live." you grin and throw your arms around her neck. She laughs and presses herself against you.

"I missed you too."

"Are you feeling better?" you ask and have to suppress a grin because you know exactly why she was “sick” for so long.

"Yes, much better. Thanks." You put your bag down and walk through the long hallway to Nat's living room. She has already pushed the couch aside and laid out blankets and pillows in front of the huge television. Wanda sits on the floor next to Natasha. You greet them both with a hug and then collapse next to them.

"I ordered you a spinach pizza." Peggy says as she sits down next to you.

"Thanks. What happened Nat?" Your best friend wrinkles her nose. She has no make-up on and her eyes are bloodshot. She had cried.

"Rick and I broke up." You and Wanda exchange a quick look after Nats words. Then you turn to her.

"Oh what a shame."

"I'm sorry for that."

"You fit together so well."

"Fucking liars! None of you liked him and Peggy didn't even know him." she starts laughing and then crying. And then both at the same time. You quickly hug her and Wanda and Peggy also wrap her arms around her so it becomes a group hug. Natasha cries for a while and then takes a long sip from her vodka bottle. The smell alone makes you sick. Nat takes a few deep breaths. "Now it's proven Bruce was my last love." she says sadly.

"No! Nat. He was your first love but definitely not your last." you contradict her.

"Yes, exactly." agrees Peggy.

"But then why didn't it work again?"

"Because Rick was an ass?" Wanda suggests. "

"He just wasn't right for you."

"But at some point the right one comes along." Peggy adds.

Natasha looks at all of you and then smiles. "Thanks." She says and then wipes away her tears. "Enough crying about Rick."

"Exactly men are not worth our tears." you say. Nat laughs briefly.

"It doesn't sound honest coming from you. You're in love head over heels."

"Nat!"

Wanda looks at you in surprise, but you know from Peggy's grin that she already knows. Steve is such a gossip girl.

"You have a boyfriend? Since when and who?" Wanda asks.

"Since Monday." you answer, smiling. "Bucky." "

I knew you were too convincing. Best friends never make out like that." she exclaims. You start laughing.

"We're drinking now." Natasha decides and holds up the vodka bottle. Wanda reaches past her for a few glasses and juice. Unlike Nat, none of you like straight vodka. Natasha shares her bottle of vodka with you and when she hands the cup to Peggy you swallow. Oh no. .

"I can't." says Peggy.

"Why not? It's girls' night."

Peggy takes a deep breath. "I'm pregnant."

"WHAT?" shouts Wanda.

"Oh my God."

"How surprising." You say, looking to the side because you can't suppress a grin.

"Are we happy?" Natasha asks uncertainly.

"Yes, we are happy. We are very happy." Peggy replies, laughing. This time it's her who gets a group hug. "And Y/N don't pretend. Bucky has known since day one and I'm sure you've known since day two. You suck at lying." Peggy says after you break away from the hug and lightly pushes you on the shoulder.

"He kept quiet until last week. I swear."

“So just juice for Peggy,” says Natasha and makes her another glass. "We'll toast anyway. To the first love and the last love." You toast and drink. To first love and last love. A nice toast actually.

*

You sprint out of your office. You're way too late and you hate yourself for it. But you couldn't leave earlier, your project is going well but a few things had to be finished today. You are responsible, so you take personal care. As you walk through the streets you rummage through your pocket for your cell phone. You actually wanted to go home after work, but then you would be even later for the dinner with your friends. You meet in 10 minutes and you are still 30 minutes away from the restaurant. You call Bucky.

"I just left the office." You say breathlessly as he answer the call.

"I thought so, I'm already on my way to the others. Should I come pick you up?"

"No, no. Then you will drive past the restaurant, I'm just a little late. But I'll hurry up."

"Take it easy, Doll. Take a deep breath. Being late isn't the end of the world."

"But it's rude." "

I bet you you'll get there before Tony and because he and Pepper invited us out you'll be on time."

"It doesn´t work like that." you laugh, but your steps slow down a little.

"It works exactly the way we want it to. Now breathe in and out deeply." You do what he says. "Better?"

"Much better. Why are you so perfect?" Bucky laughs quietly.

"I've waited for us for so long. I'm doing my best now." Your heart flutters at his words.

"You're perfect. The perfect boyfriend. I love you."

"I love you too. I'll see you soon, Doll."

"See you soon." Unfortunately, when you arrive at the restaurant, Pepper and Tony are already there. You are the last and the only one still wearing your work clothes. "I'm so sorry guys. I was stuck at work."

"It's okay Y/N. Don't stress. It's nice that you make it." Pepper smiles at you. She only came back two days ago. That's why you're eating together this Thursday. And this time you are complete again since a long time. You hug Pepper.

"Good to see you." You say and greet the others before you sit down next to Bucky and press a kiss on his lips.

"Hey Bucks." you say.

"Hey, Doll. See, I say being late isn't a bad thing."

"Why do you act like you're together when Rick and Nat have broken up?" Vision asks confused and looks between you and Bucky.

"Oh shit, I forgot to tell you." Wanda says, slapping her hand on her forehead. You all start laughing. Yes, maybe everything is different now, but somehow the same.

What about neighbor!Bucky offering to help fix something -sink or door has come loose- and he's working shirtless and you're trying to not stare but 👀 "like what you see peaches?" And he proceeds to fuck you so rough your bed breaks and he's just grinning at you "guess ill have to come over and fix up a new bed for you"

⟶ handyman • neighbour!bucky

word count || ~ 1,000 words

warnings || lots of sexual tension, flirting, pet-name [peach], sundress kink [idk, but bucky has it], housewife kink, polite/ good girl reader [and it drives bucky wild], praise kink, degradation & dumbification [slut/big girl words], unprotected sex, breeding kink, bucky makes reader beg, edging, cunt slapping, spit kink [bucky spits over pussy], broken headboard — 18+ ONLY//MINORS DNI

notes || this was a lot and i loved it

“I can’t thank you enough, really, you didn’t haven’t,” you’re gushing as Bucky toes his shoes off and follows you into the kitchen before chuckling.

“How could I let you live on with a leaking sink, huh?” He teases and you feel your chest fluttering at his words.

You show him the damage, a leaking sink with a faucet that won’t work. You’d been meaning to call a plumber, but Bucky insisted that he take a look at it first before he let you spend any money on it.

Plus, having Bucky over was always a treat. Ever since you and your now ex-husband divorced, it’s been a little too quiet at home.

“This just looks like you’re typical leaky sink, Peach,” he comments, the pet-name falling so seamlessly, “it shouldn’t take more than an hour of work or so.”

He smiles, sweetly and kindly as you mimic his smile.

“Let me at least pay you in lunch, okay? I’ve got some fresh baked bread and homemade lemonade that’s too good to pass up.”

He chuckles again, “I won’t turn down an offer like that.”

You let him get to work, grabbing everything you need out of the fridge to assemble some sandwiches before grabbing the pitcher of lemonade and some ice.

Still, you can’t help but let your eyes wander as he works; metal arm gleaming under the early afternoon sun as the fabric of his shirt conceals very little.

“You know,” he grunts, wrench clanging against the sink as he stands, “it’s rude to stare, Peach.”

Oh how embarrassing, you think. Ducking your head down as you shake your head before opening your mouth but nothing comes out.

You hear rustling before you find the courage to tilt your head up, “I didn’t mean to I’m so—“

He swiftly cuts you off, “‘m teasin’, Peach,” he shrugs, “besides, I think I’ve done my fair share of starin’ at you when you’re workin’ in your garden in that cute little sundress of yours.”

You feel a shudder run down your spine as you begin gnawing on the inside of your cheek.

“You could always do something about it, you know.” You suddenly whisper, a glint in your eyes that tells Bucky everything he needs to know as he’s closing in the gap between you two.

“You’ve probably been so lonely, haven’t you? All alone with no one to take care of ya?” He cooes, placing a hand on your hip as you suck in a gentle breath.

“Hasn’t been easy,” you reply, watching him cock his head to the side, “can’t imagine it’s been easy when it’s late at night and that sweet cunt of yours is beggin’ for attention.” Bucky hums, dipping his head down.

You let a faint whimper slip through your lips as you shake your head and feel your knees buckle slightly.

“I know it sure as hell ain’t been easy for me when you’ve been so nice to me,” he’s cupping your face now, eyes locked on yours.

“You’ve been such a good girl, a good little housewife with no husband,” he clicks his tongue against his teeth.

“I might not be your husband, Peach,” he pauses to run his tongue over his lip, “but I sure as hell can treat you like a good little slut.”

You moan, you actually moan at his words as you feel your core aching—begging for his touch.

“Would you like that?” He then taunts, “yes, please.” You mumble, too focused on the burning between your thighs.

He laughs, “such a polite little thing you are, it’ll make my job so much easier.”

You’re spread over the bed not long after, stripped of your dress and lying bare under Bucky as you watch him between your thighs.

You gasp when he slaps your pussy gently, “look at me, Peach.”

His eyes are dark, fingers glistening with your slick as he teases your clit again.

“I don’t want you to forget those good girl manners of yours jus’ because I’m entertainin’ your pretty cunt, understand?”

The authority in his voice makes you shudder as you nod, “yes,” you manage to squeak out.

“Good girl.” He says before diving back in and absolutely devouring you like his last meal.

He doesn’t hesitate to make a mess, spitting over the edge of your mound as it lubes his fingers further before they’re knuckle deep inside of you.

“I don’t think I’ve ever tasted anyone as sweet as you, Peach,” he cooes, “but you’re the sweetest of them all.”

You’re squirming under him, legs pinned by him as you feel yourself on the edge, but he doesn’t give it to you just yet.

“Use those big girl words, tell me what you need.”

You whine, grabbing fistfuls of your sheets, “please let me cum, I-I need to cum, please.”

You’re not beyond begging, feeling yourself so close to euphoria before he’s applying more pressure to your clit, “such a good girl for me, now make a mess.”

It knocks all the air out of your lungs, struggling to catch your breath as you slowly come down and pry your eyes open.

No one has ever made you cum that hard.

You’re being greedy, but you just want more as you pull Bucky on top of you and snake your hand under his boxers.

“Big girl words, Peach, remember?” He taunts as you whine, “fuck, Buck, fuck me please.”

It seems to be enough for him, but you can feel just how achingly hard he is before he’s pulling himself free and pressing his tip into your entrance.

“Look at that tight cunt of yours takin’ all of me,” he groans, bottoming out in you as you relish at the stretch that you hadn’t felt in nearly a year.

He snaps his hips suddenly, not giving you any warning as he grips onto your headboard for balance.

“Feels so fuckin’ good for me, Peach. Gonna make me cum so hard, gonna have that pussy absolutely fuckin’ leakin’ with my cum.”

That’s all you could possibly want as he continues to fuck you as you hear your poor headboard slowly crackling and your bed creaking.

“Cum for me and milk my cock, fuck—need’a feel you squeeze me,” the desperation in Bucky’s voice is more than enough to have you toppling over the edge before he’s spilling inside of you with a guttural groan.

Both of your breathing is erratic and wild still as Bucky looks up with a wild smirk, “well, it looks like I’ll just have to come over again to fix your headboard.”

There was a huge crack, right down the middle, and where he was gripping onto it. It made you giggle, “after you fix that leaky sink, of course.”

nora babe i’m gonna need that roommate!bucky blurb asap. your giving bud so many ideas and wheewwww i can’t wait but i keep going back to roommate!bucky

— about time ; bucky barnes

abstract: bucky finally offers to help you cum.

pairing: roommate!bucky x f!reader

word count: 1,051 words

warnings: roommate to lovers, unprotected sex, mild sexting, masturbation, use of toy, praise kink, lots of dirty talk, size kink, oral (f. receiving), soft dom bucky — 18+ ONLY • MINORS DNI

When you saw that your new roommate was going to be someone named James, you didn’t expect that to be a six foot five man with looks that could kill and a heart of gold.

And a metal arm.

No, you thought you’d get a guy who loved video games and computer science.

Not a man who worked out, shirtless, in the living room as you nursed your hangovers with coffee, orange juice, and greasy breakfast foods which he prepared for you.

You also didn’t expect to have so many goddamn wet dreams about him.

Waking up feeling rested and chipper only because of the orgasm that woke you up.

There were worse roommates.

And tonight was one of those nights. The nights where you couldn’t sleep, tossing and turning, restless and fucking horny.

Your vibrator would have to do.

You just hoped that Bucky was already asleep when the low buzzing started, slightly muffled by sheets and pillows as you closed your eyes and let your imagination drift.

Drift to him.

Wondering how he would fuck. How he would eat you out and the things he would say to you.

The faint vibrations then snapped you out of your near orgasm haze.

It was your phone, your screen lighting up as you grabbed it and nearly choked on your own saliva as you read the text.

The text from Bucky.

Use me instead, Sweets.

Was all it read.

This has to be some sick joke. A way of him messing with you. You were sure that he would poke fun at you in the morning.

Your phone buzzed again.

Don’t make me beg.

Oh God. Oh God oh God oh God.

Maybe you were asleep. You’d somehow figured out how to shift and you were just living in a simulation.

Don’t make me punish you either.

Fuck.

You audibly groaned at the last text. A shiver running down your spine and then there was a faint knock at your door.

“Come in,” your voice was hoarse, watching the door creak open and then Bucky stepped in.

Shirtless and wearing a pair of grey boxers.

God.

That’s when you realized you were practically naked — only a large shirt covering you under the covers.

“I can’t have you usin’ that poor toy anymore, Sweets.” He smirks, shutting the door and leaning against it.

You gulp in anticipation, tossing the toy to the end of the bed and sitting up.

“Atta girl,” he chuckled. “Not gonna need that anymore.”

He took a cautious seat on the edge of your bed, cocking his head as he looked you up and down.

“S’that my shirt?” He asks, smirk tugging on the edge of his lips.

You shrug, “s’mine now.”

His eyebrows raise in amusement, licking and then tugging his bottom lip between his teeth.

“I think I want it back.” His voice was just above a whisper now, darkened eyes watching the gears turning in your head.

“Fine,” you whisper back before grabbing the fabric and tugging it up and over your head revealing the rest of you to Bucky.

He groaned, closing his eyes and dropping his head as he let out a “fuck.”

The tension was palpable and thick, your heart beating fast before your lips collided with his.

It was everything he needed before you were on your back and he was between your thighs.

“Tell me what you were thinkin’ ‘bout, Sweets,” he purrs, kissing each thigh before you feel him flatten his tongue against your core.

Your fingers tangle in his hair, tugging at the roots as you moan pathetically, “you.”

He moans against your cunt, sending sweet vibrations through your body as you try to compose your thoughts.

“Was thinkin’ of you,” you’re almost panting. “Like this.”

You knew you were feeding his ego, but he was too good at eating you out that you didn’t care. You’d get on your knees for him.

Bucky’s lips wrapped around your clit, sucking and flicking the sensitive bud before he added his fingers to the mix.

Two thick, sleek and cold finger curled knuckle deep inside of you as he watched the way you shuddered.

“I know you’re close,” he breathes. “Don’t hold back for me, Sweets. Give in, give and make a mess for me.”

If Bucky talked you through every orgasm from here on out you could die happy.

He wasn’t done yet, wiping his mouth before standing tall and dropping his pants to reveal himself.

“Bucky!” You whisper yelled as he raised an eyebrow. “Are you—“ you stopped yourself out of embarrassment.

Then he smirked, “‘m gonna fit, darling. Don’t worry, I warmed you up. Gonna slide right in, get settled nice ‘n deep, okay?”

He way he whispered the words only caused a new wave of arousal to run through you before he was lining himself with your entrance.

“Hey,” his voice was soft. “Eyes on me, Sweets. Just look at me.” He smiled before pushing in a leaving you feeling full and satisfied.

He was right. He had warmed you up and while it was slightly foreign and mildly uncomfortable, he had filled you up soon after.

Bucky’s thrusts were slow and deep, savouring the way you felt around him.

“You have no idea how long I’ve wanted this,” he groans.

Two strong forearms have you caged and locked in, but it’s exactly where you wanted to be now and forever.

“To have you under me like this, takin’ me like the good little girl that you are.” His pelvis bumps your oversensitive clit.

“It’s gotten really fuckin’ hard hidin’ my boners ‘round you too. Not with the way you have to reach up and grab practically everythin’,” he chuckles while fucking you.

“I always think ‘bout you…late at night with my hand jerkin’ myself off.” You’re clawing at his back, trying to get him closer to you.

“And now?” He looks down at you, “I get to see my pretty girl cum over my cock before stuffin’ you full.”

He snaps his hips, harsher and harsher before you’re crying in ecstasy and Bucky’s hips stutter and still inside of you.

The silence that fills the room next is comfortable, Bucky’s warm arms around you as he kisses your shoulders and face.

“About damn time.”