Crack Au - Tumblr Posts

I can't take myself seriously.

This is for the LU discord weekly prompt: "everything is the same EXCEPT ___" And I decided to make everything the same- except Time is a Muppet!

This turned into a full blown AU (/srs)

Presenting an alternate universe where the collector resurrected Belos only to throw him into los angeles for the sake of watching everything he does as entertainment. He gets stuck in a convention and accidentally crashes the Danganronpa booth during the announcement of season 53 while wandering around confused out of his mind. A Danganronpa contestant, Tsumugi Shirogane, then takes pity on him and tries to return Philip to Connecticut but crashes her car after mistaking a hitchhiker for bigfoot. They get picked up by a helpful man named Alfred F. Jones who is coincidentally on his way to Washington DC. He takes them on route 66 for, you know, the memories until he crashes his car in a high speed chase where the gang is trying to outrun the mob.

Along the way Belos and Alfred bond over US history (and their childhoods in the 1700s), Alfred bonds with Tsumugi over Danganronpa, and Belos manipulates Tsumugi into telling him about the modern world.

I think between shippers (and this is me saying this, an outsider to both ships) there’s Def the nagging voice saying “Coriolanus sucks irl” in everyone’s mind

So that’s Def a part of the civility in my opinion. Like why fight when the main guy in your ship is the worst guy alive. Bonding moment IG lol

LMFAO You are so right, Anon. Bonding moment for real. As some people in the post's comment said, "we both share the toxic blond" and also "we're trauma-bonded".

But I think it's not really a nagging voice. We all know Coriolanus Snow fucking SUCKS. If you compile all of my thoughts about him from everywhere, the majority is me clowning on him actually. I want to do violence to him.

It's funny, and I'm sorry for the out of topic, but this...wish makes me fantasising about a "Coriolanus Snow & Conscience!Reader" Crack AU. I've told some of my friends but just for fun I will tell a little bit here:

Okay, the premise is right in Chapter 1, we the readers/the fans whatever you wanna call us, get inside his head and it's up to us to try to put him on a good(?) path. (Emphasis on TRY.) Or actually, it's just an excuse or catharsis for us, especially me, to clown him in his head tho, because his thoughts are so deranged, yeah? It will be fun to mock him, tease him, and "scold" him, and we will bicker a lot, and he can't do aaanything about it.

So it's like this (below has some real excerpt of Chapter 1 of the book [page 3-4] but switched to present tense):

This morning he went to her room at daybreak, only to find both his cousin and the shirt missing. Not a good sign. [...] He thinks of people putting a price on her. With her long, pointed nose and skinny body, Tigris is no great beauty, but she has a sweetness, a vulnerability that invites ab-- NOOOOOOOOO! WHAT ARE YOU SAYING ABOUT YOUR OWN COUSIN?! The voice -- scream -- comes out of nowhere and echoes very near in his ears (inside him?). To say it surprises Coriolanus is an understatement. Grabbing on air, he fails to stop himself from slipping and falling on his bottom.

Lol.

I'm not sure I want to write it because writing, even more in English, is daunting, but it's really fun to think about. It will be on the Snowbaird route, though. I imagine we will follow his love story with Lucy Gray, but I think...we will unfortunately fight over her.

LOOK! At Lucy Gray's arrival, The Voice screeches annoyingly loud in his head. It's my girl! Even after weeks, Coriolanus still hasn't decided if The Voice is a crazy part of him or an entirely separate entity somehow attached to his mind. However, the possessive term it used tugs the wrong string deep in his chest. Whether it makes sense or not, he hisses at it, 'She's not your girl.' The brief silence that follows is the most peace he gets these recent days. Oh shit, you are jealous. 'I am not.' You totally are. Just like with Billy Taupe. C'mon, I'm inside your head. I know. 'I am not.' Listen, Coryo-- 'Stop calling me that.' --just accept that Lucy Gray is everyone's girl, okay? She's my girl. She's not really just yours. 'Who in the Gem of Panem is everyone? Who even are you?' I can't tell you that. It's against the rules. 'What rules?!' Uh-uh, still can't tell. Give it up already, Coryo. Coriolanus is losing his mind. He has had a talking creature inside his head for weeks and it is just now he truly feels he is losing his mind.

Lol. Writing is hard, huh. Okay, I'm not sure this is categorised as a character & reader fic now that I used third person, not second person pov, but eh xD

I'm willing to talk about it more though, if anyone is interested!

Thank you for the ask and the space to bullshit, Anon!

AU where Morgana just. Straight-up REFUSES to believe that Merlin’s Emrys. Only thing magical about him is how many times in an hour he trips over his own face. Somehow. So Morgana’s just losing her mind with laughter. So Mordred’s like “Fine I’ll do it myself!” And fails epically and destiny crisis is averted and Morgana’s just spending the rest of her life confused as heck

Bonus points if Aithusa is also giving clear hints that YES, Merlin IS Emrys you dollophead-

Fic where Morgana and/or Morgause try to do the Tiene Diaga on Merlin but (little do they know) he has magic so he’s just sitting in a room that sounds like it’s full of screaming toddlers (and I feel like he’d be used to loud noises from all the chaos he’s stopped/caused) so they’re wondering why the heck he won’t break/submit to their will and meanwhile he’s just like. Sitting there. And it scares the crap out of the sisters

This was on my last account but

Aithusa leaving muddy talonprints a la Blue’s Clues on everything that has any remote relation to Merlin whenever Morgana goes on a rant about tryna find Emrys

Merlin but the entire show is channeling Phineas and Ferb

Like. There’s some dude who’s (correctly) accusing Merlin of sorcery and everyone (except Uther (if he’s alive) because he’s immune to thinking someone who even says the word “magic” could ever be innocent) thinks “nah he’s an idiot there’s no way”

And then Morgana/Morgause triggers a chain reaction that wipes away all evidence of Merlin having performed magic from the kingdom.

Ending scene, cut to the accuser pointing at Merlin, who’s sitting under a tree and petting Arthur’s hunting dogs.

The way the intruder is dealt with after that is left to one’s imagination as Arthur asks who wants pie.

AU where everybody in the cloud kingdom knows Euphrasia’s the master of wind and is cool with it but just figured it’s just one of those things they didn’t talk about.

The only one who doesn’t know that everyone knows Euphrasia is the master of wind is EUPHRASIA HERSELF so when it’s time to tell them she’s panicking the whole time she’s helping them close the mergequake. She then gives the same big dramatic speech only for the scene to end up something like

Suetonious: We… already know this??? Why are you acting like it’s such a big deal???

Euphrasia: wait a minute what

Writer 1: Wait a minute did you not know we knew?

Euphrasia: NO???

Writer 2: Euphrasia. Listen to me and listen closely. All of us saw the wind pushing you AND ONLY YOU around the cloud kingdom on days you were late for things how could we NOT know

Euphrasia: ???!!?!? !!?!? !??!?

AU where instead of Legos the ninja are Furbys and Crystallized is just Lloyd going through THIS arc

and scaring the crap out of Misako

And for June because I’m a sucker for Aroace Lloyd, AU where the public finds out about Lloyd being Not Entirely Human TM because some kid raised by two aphobes somehow managed to find the topic of him being aroace in conversation with him.

Since they’ve heard something about how “romantic/s3xual attraction is what makes us human,” the kid’s first reaction is to be like, “so are you not human?”

And Lloyd proceeds to internally panic SO MUCH that he doesn’t even notice as multiple different Dragoni traits, many of which he didn’t even know he HAD, pop out one by one.

Cue chaos.

Thinkin about Moonwatcher again

AU where she’s actually terrible at hiding her powers and it’s only through BBC Merlin levels of pure obliviousness that nobody finds out.

She thinks they know. They don’t.

Notable examples of Things That Have Happened Because Moon Is A Terrible Actor include:

- Kinkajou’s mind in music class: “man what’s that song that’s like ‘IF OUR LOOOVE’S INSANITY WHY ARE YOU MY CLARITY’”

Moon: (immediately starts singing Clarity by Zedd because now it’s stuck in HER head too) (realizes) (stops and shuffles awkwardly)

- Moon finally working up the courage to volunteer to read aloud to the class but she suddenly gets The Vision TM and starts reciting the Jade Mountain prophecy, glowy eyes and all, before apologizing awkwardly and continuing right back into the book. She distances herself from everyone as much as she can the rest of the day but nobody notices anything and just assumed she got lost somehow because she DID drop her book when the vision started

- Moon bringing up SPECIFICALLY the moment where Cobra threw Qibli at the wall for stealing her a coconut in conversation about childhoods “yeah my mom was terrible” “yeah didn’t you like steal a coconut for her and she threw you at the wall??? And you were like REALLY young at the time right???” “…I don’t remember telling you that but yEAH she did” (awkward look from Moon)

- Moon slipping up and saying there are “too many thoughts in here” in a crowded room and even as she’s stiffening up and has this SUPER awkward look on her face everyone just assumes she means her brain like anyone else would

-Moon saying “Mood” when the chorus to Noise by Leah Marlene plays and immediately covering her mouth and looking guilty (all jokes aside please check out this song it’s so good)

-Moon winning 20 questions MULTIPLE times in a row. She’s banned from guessing games now. She always asks one or two questions just to be a lil bit normal but it’s like. “I’m thinking of an animal” “is it furry?” “No” “corn snake?” “yEAH ACTUALLY-”

-Moon having designated a lil area that nobody really goes to where she can run off to if she feels a vision coming on and she’s able to run and Peril getting lost and walking in on her a GAZILLION times (bonus points if it’s in Stonemover’s cave purely because that’d be really funny)

And combine that with the canon muttering prophecies in her sleep and knowing immediately what’s wrong with Bandit and it’s just overall a REALLY suspicious picture

So of course she’s VERY confused after the history cave incident when it turns out NOBODY knew.

(Not even Kinkajou, who unironically used the expression “you just read my mind” SO many times around her it COULDN’T have been a coincidence, right???)

Uhhh AU where Moon rolls a nat 1 on stealth the first time the Rainwings get close enough to see her and she ends up adopted by them

But WAIT there’s a TWIST

Through a series of misunderstandings and gaslighting, everyone (including Moon herself) is convinced that the voices in her head are just her OWN thoughts (“yeah everyone hears a voice in their heads it’s their thoughts” “but I’ve got like. Twenty.” “Well then you must have a LOT of thoughts”)

And the visions are just products of an overactive imagination or smth (the headaches they come with are TOTALLY coincidental what are you talking about)

So of course she starts hearing from Darkstalker and he’s all hopeful but she’s just like “oh new sound for the thoughts! add it to The Collection! Soon I’ll have a whole PARTY of voice actors in here! :D”

Eventually she recognizes the history cave in THAT vision and she’s too panicked to tell the difference between imagination and reality because it’s just SO VIVID and SO SUDDEN. At least that’s what she thinks until the history cave explodes etc etc

Cue the Jade Winglet realizing “oh, she has Nightwing powers,” followed immediately by them realizing, “OH, tHrEe MoOns she doesn’t even KNOW she has Nightwing powers…”

And from there it’s just a bunch of shenanigans as everyone tries to undo multiple years of gaslighting

As for why Secretkeeper never told her after the Night and Rain kingdoms combined we’re gonna go with she just assumed Moon knew already and it was too late by the time she realized she hadn’t known at all

TLDR

Battle of the bands AU EXCEPT the DOD are a Pentatonix-style acapella group

MAN what I wouldn’t give for a Ninjago Ace Attorney AU with noir detective Zane involved somehow

AU where Instead of just telling the Jadelets she’s hearing Darkstalker Moon just starts singing the Dirt Man song and when everyone figures it out Darkstalker is called Dirt Man by everyone at JMA forever and ever and he explodes from pure embarrassment and nothing bad ever happens the end

Headcanon/AU where Whiteout can see through the fourth wall

This is what they call a crack AU right?... anyways here's something.

Crack AU idea because it's dark outside, I'm sick, I didn't sleep properly for the all week and I'm under a lot of stress for the few next days. In conclusion I live in denial of all my duties.

Crack MHA AU

The LOV wants to do a good impression and kidnapped a Yuei's kid. Unfortunately that was Denki and it's end up with him being friend with Toga and Twice. Tomura eventually kicks him out because if he heard them singing "baby shark" one more time he's gonna disintegrate himself.

But he continues to come back and it's become a sort of weekly meeting where they play video games and other stuffs. Doesn't mean Denki is the traitor, he just hangs out with the LOV.

Eventually the Bakusquad getting curious and discover the all thing. They're first chocked because they believe Denki betrayed them but the LOV are just like "No don't worry it's just our walking-vines-mental-health-support hero." The Bakusquad joins the party and this is how the "Saturday night of peace" is born. No more fights or moral issues just games and a lot of bad movies and unhealthy food. Toga, Mina and Denki chat while doing their nails. Bakugou, Spinner and Tomura trying to destroy each other at Mario Kart. Kirishima being supportive with everybody and Dabi and Sero maybe smoking weed but we have no proves.

Gradually all the class joined the group (because let's be real they're all fucking curious problem kids). And even the ex-rooftop squad. Maybe Hawks accidentally walks in one day and he's like "Shit wtf" but anyway he joins the party because it's fun.

I don't really know how the interactions of everybody would look like. But I want Izuku and Tomura (because I like the headcanon where AFO is Izuku's dad) + Dabi and Shoto act like chaotic siblings. Iida and Tomura bonding over their hate for Stain "I tried to kill him once. -Well once I tried to annihilate an entire city because he was in. -Truly inspirational." (and they throw peanuts at Spinner when he's being a fanboy about Stain). I want the rooftop squad being reunited (maybe Kurogiri can start remember things from Oboro and become a sort of mixed version of the two?) and act like: Aizawa and Kuroboro are wine moms ; Nemuri and Magne are the jin aunt and Hizashi the mojito dad. Twice and Toga perfectly fit the chaos of the class 1A. Hawks acting like an embarrassing big brother for Tokoyami.

Did I mentioned Min*ta doesn't existing ? Well he doesn't exist lmao. At his place there's just Shinsou who was a little confused at first but now roll with it.

Toga asking Mina advices for flirting with Uraraka. Yuuga and Sako still manage to look like fucking top models in this hovel.

During the second year of the now class 2A they arrived at this conclusion: AFO is a son of bitch, the Comission are fucking bastards so let's do our own thing. So they process to take down AFO and the actual government with the help of Nedzu who followed all the things since the beginning and always wanted to take down the government.