Damian Wayne Headcanon - Tumblr Posts

That happens to me too much 💀

(6:27 on your way to school)

Y/n: *starts crying out no where *

Damian: starts to panic* beloved why are you crying?!?

Y/n: It’s—it’s not even seven o’clock yet and it’s Tuesday! *cries even more* I though it was Thursday!

Damian: *lovingly wipes your tears away* what about it love?

Y/n: i don’t wanna go to school….

Damian who is just confused: y/n……

(Literally was my mood all last week 💀)

DAMIAN WAYNE HEADCANONS !!!

ah, love of my life. this man right here got me years ago into learning more about the batfam and now here i am. you can say it’s kind of his fault. anyways,,, no one asked for this but my brain did. 

requests are open! hit that anon button and tell me your idea!

warnings: swearing, hadn’t been proof-read.

damian’s head is a MESS. don’t get me wrong, the guy is a little genius, but imagine the chaos of languages he has -- arab, english, chinese, i’m a hundred percent he knows russian, urdu is nanda parbat’s official language... 

because of this (^^) he just sometimes shuts down and stays silent. he can’t even think.

he loves all animals but he can’t handle insects. jason found out, and damian bribed him with a collectors special edition of classical books. nobody must know his weaknesses.

he writes in cursive, i have no clues but also no doubts.

words are difficult for him, that’s why he talks the way he does -- so professionally, like he is from another age. 

can stand tim (in small amounts) but no longer they will always have an intellectual rivalry -- it’s probably more from damian’s side rather than tim’s.

he still feels like he has to hide that he looks up to dick.

damian searched what fanfiction was. he’s scarred for life now. 

he’s straight up bored of paparazzi. he’ll go lady gaga on their ass and stare at the ones that are hidden in a bush trying to take pictures of him in secret.

also he will go full cole sprouse on the people trying to take pictures on him while he’s walking through gotham (this means he will snap pictures of the civilians before they snap a picture of him. camera duels, that’s the name)

listens to A LOT of music. everything his siblings listen to, he does too. classical music is his favorite, however. (also enjoys jazz).

taking care of his animals and his duties as robin are his favorite activities.

doesn’t understand social media, but still uses it. he’s too stubborn to admit he’s bad handling that.

too lazy to figure out how to cook, but if he tried in the slightest, he would be an amazing cook.

damian is an incredibly fast learner. it amazes the fuck out of bruce how many new things he can learn in just one day. 

he grows to be an actually very kind person, but his snarky remarks and dry humor never disappears.

likes the addams family. what a surprise.

doesn’t get horror/slasher movies. he keeps getting bored and doesn’t react to the jumpscares. jason says he is dead inside, which everyone agreed on.

they don’t know (^^) that damian is making a superhuman effort to not kick someone when the jumpscares occur because this little guy has his senses to the maximum all the time.

can’t be bothered unless someone is being ignorant or trashing about his family. he’s the only one that trashes about his family >:(

texts like a grandpa but at least he knoews what’s happening (most of the times)

like jason, damian has been kicked out of the wayne family chat numerous times.

has an elderly person soul except for when he’s fighting. then he’s a vicious little shit-

plays piano. no, i will not elaborate.

will correct your grammar in a condescending tone of voice.

“don’t patronaze me.” @ everyone.

has general knowledge about a shit ton of things. and since he doesn’t know how to properly socialize (canon) will spill those facts in order to start a conversation during galas.

has threatened the police -- 10/10 will do it again.

damian couldn’t care less about gossip but since he’s a good listener he always ends up knowing the tea about  E V E R Y T H I N G.

cocky bastard. that’s it, that’s all i’m saying.

he has no idea how to handle compliments. it still makes him freeze whenever someone says he’s cute or has pretty eyes.

“no.” (damian’s answer every time someone calls him cute).

believes in soulmates and in love at first sight, not as a superficial concept but as a ‘i’m clicking and mystically attracted to this person rewardless of their looks’.

reads A LOT.

never as much as jason, and also he doesn’t just read like narrative books -- he reads those thick books about how to do things, biographys, and studies about subjects he randomly knows about.

barely sleeps, if he ever does. 

sleep is for the weak™

(^^) proceeds to randomly fall asleep during patrols or family dinners.

acts like a brat but he actually isn’t -- it’s so complicated to explain, i hope someone just gets it.

at 17 he’s taller than dick and almost as tall as jason. suck it, @ everyone who mocked his height.

jon kent is his Best Friend™

(^^) damian told me himself.

he’s very handsome (canon lolz)

no but like, i mean, he will actually be one of those men you think ‘good fucking lord, he’s handsome’

damian thinks selina is cool.

has a lot of anger and frustration inside. it calms him down knowing jason also has problems like those because it makes him feel more... normal.

because normal is something damian would have liked to feel if he hadn’t been conceived to be perfect.

he would love six of crows -- would really like kaz brekker.

secretly enjoys the ya genre, will never admit it out loud.

Y/n: I'm sorry Damian, I really need some space rn and some alone time, its not you, its me i promis-

Damian: if you wanted space you should've become an astronaut, now come over so we can cuddle 🙄

Different character, same font

The most underutilized and funny ability of Damian Wayne should be this:

This idiot, instead of you know *dodging*, just moves his organs out of the way.

And I know the guy's a magician and stuff but he isn't even tied up.

Like, we're talking about a kid who escaped Deathstroke and Killer croc while being chained down. I firmly believe that he could've escaped without being stabbed.

Anyways, it would be so funny that he doesn't tell anyone else about this ability and proceeds to get stabbed and shot because he can just 'move his organs out of the way'.

Animal Instinct

Pairing: Damian Wayne x Reader (Platonic), Dick Grayson x Reader (Established)

Family dinners at the Wayne Manor was not uncommon and since being engaged to Dick, your appearance at his childhood home had only increased, not that anyone was complaining, you were part of the family now.

You always looked forward to family dinner, enjoying the huge number of people that attended, the delicious food and the boisterous atmosphere.

This time you and your fiancé had gotten there early so you were already seated in the dining room when everyone began filing in one by one.

You kept a close eye on the door, in a way that reminded Dick of his eager puppy awaiting for him to come home. When the person you were waiting for stepped in, your face lit up and you snatched up Damian into your lap.

He struggled, trying to push you off him but he was hardly any match for your super strength. You giggled, nuzzling your face against the top of his head. The rest of the family didn't even react, hiding smiles and chuckling at your dynamic.

"Why must you do this every time, (Y/N)?!" He whined, struggling to get out of your grip and you shrugged.

"I don't know, I see tiny human, I must cuddle tiny human. It's like animal instinct." You explained simply, pecking his cheek quickly and Damian pretended to give up his struggle and slumped against you like you knew he would.

"Are you comparing yourself to an animal?" Came his judgmental tone and you turned to face him with wide eyes.

"Are you implying that animals are beneath humans and it's therefore humiliating to compare myself to them?" You asked with faux innocence, knowing he'd never bad-mouth an animal.

Damian blushed and avoided your gaze, "No.."

You chuckled at him, "I just love you is all."

"You should feel lucky, lord knows she doesn't give me this much attention." Dick piped up and you stuck your tongue out at him.

Tim shrugged, "It's compulsory for the youngest of the family to get some (Y/N) lovin'. If you hate it so much, just hope that the next kid bruce adopts is younger than you."

Bruce grunted at this and you hid a laugh in Damian's hair.

The baby in your lap huffed as he completely surrendered to you, "The thought makes me sick."

No one had to ask him if he didn't like the idea of another sibling or of someone else getting your undivided attention. It was obvious in the way he burrowed his reddening face in your neck.

Forever Taglist:

@simonsbluee

@hanbedumbaf

@superheroesaremyjam113263

@writers-whirlwind

DC Taglist:

@emmacata

@p--e--a--c--h--e--s

@sometimeseverythingsucks

@sokkas-honour

@unstable1902

@lostgirlheart

@missdisapear

@tadpole-san

@isawachickeninatree

@uxavity

@battlenix

@capricorn-stark

@evermoore580

@dumbbitchgalore

@fuckingjinkies

@some-lovely-day

Single Dad Damian! Who has a set of twins. A boy and a girl.

Single Dad Damian! Who doesn’t struggle to care for them when their new borns but when they both start to crawl it becomes a struggle.

Single dad Damian! Who doesn’t hire a nanny until they are six years old because he’s stubborn and convinced himself that as they grow older it’ll be easier to care for them. That was a lie.

Single dad Damian! Who hires you as their 24/7 nanny, after doing days of background cheeks on you to make sure his children will be in good care

Single Dad Damian! Offers you a place to live once you are hired. Doesn’t care if you agree or not but suggest you live under his roof so it’ll be easier to look after them.

Single Dad Damian! Who finally has time to get his work done, and doesn’t haven’t to worry about his children at night when he’s dressed in leather and hiding in the shadows.

Single Dad Damian! Who enjoys your late night company when both children are sound asleep in their beds.

Single Das Damian! Tends to forget about his kids recitals and appreciate when you send him a small text reminding him. He’s always front and center with you beside him as you watch both children at play.

Single Dad Damian! Loves the sound of his children laughing and squealing while he’s cooped up in his office signing and ready boring papers. Also loves that fact that you pull him away from it so he can spend some time with his children for a bit.

Single Dad Damian! Who watches you get along with both kids. Braiding his daughter hair neatly and playing games with his son. And reading bed time stories when he won’t be able to for the night.

Single Dad Damian! Who slowly but surely falls head over heels for his children’s nanny. He doesn’t realize until his own kids call him out for it.

Single dad Damian! Who hates his children for trying to set him up on a date with their own nanny.

Single dad Damian! Who scolds his children after they ask you if you wanted to be their new mommy.

Will I probs write a whole one shot of this? Definitely 😙

Damian Wayne x Artistic!reader Headcanons<3

link to series masterlist <3

-Damian who is incredibly supportive of your passion for drawing and sketching.

-Damian who often finds your sketches scattered around and picks them up carefully, admiring your talent.

-Damian who keeps some of your best sketches in a special folder, and occasionally, you might find one framed in his room or study.

-Damian who uses his Wayne privileges to have dates at art galleries, museums, and exhibitions.

-Damian who you frequently take on sketching dates in Gotham’s parks or rooftops, to capture the city’s skyline and its hidden beauty. (he draws you the whole time)

-Damian who gifts you the highest-quality sketchbooks and drawing supplies he can find

-Damian who has a personalized sketchbook made for you with your initials engraved on the cover

-Damian who lets you try your hand at drawing him, even if you aren't as skilled. He cherishes your attempts.

-Damian who you attempt to collaborate with on designing new costumes for his vigilante persona (he still insists that it doesn't need an update)

-Damian who when his words fail him, uses sketches to express his feelings.

-Damian who might leave a sketch you drew of a significant moment in your relationship with a heartfelt note, showing his softer side.

-Damian who some of your most intimate moments are spent with, sketching together in comfortable silence.

-Damian who is often the focal point of your art after you become official

-Damian who is utterly yours

Damian helps his siblings with School.

You know how older siblings usually help younger siblings with their homework/classwork? Now, usually, Damian being the youngest of like, 7, if you include Stephanie, he would need and receive the most help, right?

WRONG.

Damian is canonically very book smart, so headcanon he's the one helping Duke, and maybe Tim if he gets into school. Like, sure Tim is REALLY smart, but school-studies are pretty different. Geography? History? Biology? hell, even some maths, Tim needs the help, and he'll even take it from Damian!

Duke is really smart, he is, but he could use some help, and Damian already has no problem with his homework and is pretty free, he'll take the chance of letting Damian help!

now he's trapped. There's no getting out of it.

Hell, he might even help Stephanie sometimes, for chapters/subjects she's having trouble with.

And, well, they pass the subjects, but at what cost?

"Are you STUPID? i JUST told you the formula to solve this, WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU FORGOT IT THOMAS??? DO YOU NEED ME TO BEAT IT IN YOU?"

"I knew you were incompetent, Drake, BUT WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU THOUGHT ALASKA WAS THE SMALLEST STATE????? SHOW ME THE SOURCE YOU FOUND THIS INFORMATION- you FOUND IT ON YOUTUBE????"

"So, you think the Romans and Greeks??? were the same??? ...gET OUT OF MY SIGHT- GO BACK TO FUCKING 3RD GRADE, BROWN, YOUR NOT PASSING HISTORY"

Thanks to @brokenstar28 for finding the photo <3

LOOK LOOK, HEAR ME OUT.

Does anyone remember the comic where Damian just casually kills a bat? REMEMBER? I can’t find the COMIC PAGE AND IM CRYING ABOUT IT BUT- I know you guys know what I’m talking about. (Found it)

HE LOVED BATS. AND THEN MRS HARSH TAUGHT HIM WEAKNESS WAS BAD AND NOT TO GROW ATTACHED.

IF this isn’t proof enough that Damian isn’t really a brat, it’s just a the horribly abusive league I don’t what it is- I just really saw the connection and got in my MatPat era for a second.

Let me know what you think?

Realising, that after Damian went to hell, ‘Go to hell!’ Or any insult similar to this becomes a WHOLE lot more personal- Like you know you done f*cked up if he says that to you :o