Express - Tumblr Posts
So many feelings passing through this framework made of flesh and bones. I lack the canvas of words to paint them. Maybe some feelings needn't be expressed, maybe some are just supposed to be felt and kept close. Either way, to feel is to be alive and I'm grateful to be alive enough to feel.
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Steam locomotive at winter night (2022)
Train from the past and from my dreams
A steam locomotive breaks the silence of a winter day (2023)
About a boy I love/d.
He likes wearing plain shirts, matched with romantic sleepy eyes, soft chuckles, and a voice that can calm/frighten me. Find it much appealing when his hair is all downright messy but that bothered him. I always thought it was perfect. He likes wearing his cap backwards which, to me, is amiable because he’s good at playing the part of looking all rugged but in an odd but fairly decent way. I loved that. Smooth with wordplay, always have the heart with words but preferred the quiet. Balance.
We fight over who owns the remote, I can’t even sleep deep when he wins but I try and then I get tired trying so I wait for him to slumber first. And then, in a small fraction of moments I win, I take control, I turn off all the things that bother me that could hinder my naps, I'd kiss his cheek quick, he grunts whilst unaware. I smirk because I like looking at him when he sleeps, I secretly take pictures of his nice thick eyelashes because I envy them. He wakes up annoyed. I roll my eyes but I cling anyway and do weird sniffs because I like his scent, he looks at me with a blank face, pulls me closer like a child who only longs for his old but soft favorite pillow.
He plans well, I’m the messed up assertive. That did not quite match, I think. Contradiction of the opposites, in the cynic point-of-view, it just isn’t. In the eyes of a romantic; it’s the terrible beauty of yin yang. He’s the epitome of great and it felt a lot like I’m the sin in the scene and I do find that concept honestly comforting.
I unwillingly recall voices at 3 am. Got old recorded voicemails I have no courage to play bec I'd long for him and it's hard not to.
"I'd write about you."
I write about anything that consumes me, I make art and songs out of subtle hints. He consumed what's left of me, strange, because despite it I felt whole, unfixed but not empty.
Divine dancer. 🦚 The karma we carry from our past lives affects how we express ourselves in this life. We must release all fear and shame in our bodies to express our true selves.
Exotic Dancer 🐾 I used to be a dancer when I was younger. I loved the feeling of being on stage, the energy of the lights, and the excitement of performing. It gave me a sense of freedom in how I expressed myself. I’d let my hair down and be completely wild and uninhibited for the night.
more Express
i swear I ain't dead
