Incorrect League Of Villains - Tumblr Posts
League of Villains: *all strewn across the floor, various tables and chairs*
Shigaraki: *stumbles in, pale and sweaty* Hey, guys...I'm dying.
Dabi: I was dying earlier. Then I died. Now I'm dead.
Twice: *sobs* I'm miserable!
Toga: Twice isn't even contradicting himself...
Shigaraki: *slides down against the wall onto the floor, clutching his stomach*
Spinner: What is this...?
Kurogiri: *stiffly walks in, leaning against the doorframe*
Kurogiri: It's food poisoning. I have it, too. I did not sleep for one second last night. And I vomited no less than seven times.
L.O.V.: *all groan*
Hawks: Oh, God, don't say that...
Shigaraki: Has anybody talked to Compress?
Spinner: Oh, I can't even imagine what that stick is going through...
Dabi: I have vomited more than Mister's body weight in the last twelve hours alone...he may have just disappeared off the face of the Earth!
Toga: *trying to get up* We need to call him, we must reach out to him!
Toga: *falls onto her face, whimpering* I can't...I can't do it.
Kurogiri: *stands up with a groan of pain and exertion, stiffly walks over to the landline*
Kurogiri: *swings his arm, knocking the phone onto the floor before slumping down against the bar*
Kurogiri: Twice, Extension 7820.
Twice: *rolls over to the phone, slowly starts tapping the numbers in with his nose*
Some time later...
Mr. Compress: *saunters into the bar, humming cheerfully*
Mr. Compress: *sees the state of the League* Woah! It smells like vomit died in here! What happened?
Kurogiri: We got food poisoning, Compress. How do you not have food poisoning...?
Spinner: Because he didn't eat anything.
Shigaraki: He just kept taking pictures and talking about the "wow" factor.
Mr. Compress: Not true, I ate everything you all did.
Kurogiri: Think, Atsuhiro. Was there anything you didn't eat?
Mr. Compress: Oh, yes! Those stupid chicken fingers Hawks brought! They're not a proper dinner food at all!
Hawks: *shocked* The chicken...betrayed me?
Hawks: *looks to the League* Never again, guys. As God as my witness, they are dead to me.
Mr. Compress: Alright, well, I feel great, so I'm going to eat some sushi and then get you all some fluids. I bid you adieu!
L.O.V.: *all groan in misery*
Everyone: *trying to hold down a sick Shigaraki while Kurogiri tries to shove a spoon full of medicine in his mouth*
Spinner: How can he be so sick but still so strong?!
Twice: Like the economy!
The League: *all incredibly exhausted and injured after a battle*
All For One: And so you must climb to the top, taking control so that no one shall ever oppose you or your--!
Kurogiri: Sensei, could you please just shut the [BLEEP] up? I can't stand listening to any more of this [BLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP!] for one more second.
Everyone: *all staring, jaws dropped*
Kurogiri: ...
Kurogiri: Why is everyone staring at me? Did something just happen?
Kurogiri: ...I think I blacked out.
Shigaraki: Were you even listening to me?
Toga: No. Sorry, my attention span is shorter than I am
i hope hawks gets paid overtime for this
Shigaraki : I found this pre quirk song it's pretty neat.
Toga : Play it!
Shigaraki : *plays*
*Oohhh Mr. Potato head tell me is it true that- *
Kurogiri : Slowly looking at AFO.
AFO :......