Tes V - Tumblr Posts
these tumblr ads are getting weirder and weirder
I loooove her
In English, we say, "Hello."
In TES, we say, "Hey, you. You're finally awake. You were trying to cross the border, right? Walked right into that Imperial ambush, same as us, and that thief over there."
Shrine of Mehrunes Dagon
Concept art for The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim
Art by Ray Lederer
fuck this stupid fucking game
5'1 Freyja: Help! I'm drowning!
7'2 Miraak: Calm down it's only six feet of water
Freyja: NOT EVERYONE IS TALL
*While planning to break in somewhere* Miraak: Hey, let's do "Get Help!" Freyja: What? Miraak: "Get Help." Freyja: No. Miraak: C'mon, you love it! Freyja: I hate it. Miraak: It's great! It works every time! Freyja: It's humiliating. Miraak: Do you have a better plan? Freyja: No. Miraak: We're doing it! Freyja: We are not doing "Get Help!" *A Minute Later* Miraak, carrying Freyja: Get help! Please! My wife is dying! Help her! *throws Freyja at guards, knocking them out* Miraak: Ahh, classic! Freyja: *gets up* I still hate it. It's humiliating. Miraak, laughing: Not for me, it's not.
Miraak: Where are your parents? Freyja: What are parents? Miraak: That’s just about the saddest thing I've ever heard.
Lucien: Bro, I had a dream we fucked. Inigo: Bro, relax it was just a dream. Lucien: Huh, gay, I wouldn’t fuck you. Inigo: You wouldn’t? Lucien: I mean, unless you want to-
*Everyone is playing a board game together* Serana: I will put 'A' down to make 'A'. Auri: I will add onto your 'A' to make 'AT'. Freyja: I will add onto your 'AT' to make 'RAT'. Lucien: I will add onto your 'RAT' to make 'BIOSTRATAGRAPHIC'. Freyja: *flips the board*
Serana: *slams books down in front of Miraak* Serana: Boil up some Mountain Dew. It’s gonna be a long night. Miraak: You could of said literally anything else. Serana: Cauldron boil and cauldron bubble, Baja Blast to fuel my trouble. Miraak: I’m going to just stop challenging you when you say random shit. I won’t win. I realize this now.
Freyja: You don't think I can fight because of my gender! Auri: I don't think you can fight because you're in a wedding dress. For what it's worth, I don't think Inigo can fight in that dress either. Inigo: Perhaps not. But I would make a radiant bride.
This but make it Miraak and Freyja
If there is one person in Skyrim that has figured out how the female orgasm works, it is MIRAAK
Serana: Are oranges named orange because oranges are orange or are oranges called orange because oranges are orange? Alessia: Which came first, the orange or the orange? Miraak: Orange was first used to refer to the fruit 1280 years ago but was not used as a color until 1000 years ago. Kyra: What was the color called before then? Freyja: There was no color, duh! Everything was black and white!
Never, even on my first playthrough i do remember sparing the life of Erandur because he was a cool character
Does anybody actually kill Erandur when Vaermina commands your character to?
this is the most self indulgent shit i’ve ever drawn in my life , bruh 🙈
the fact that all of the main priest’s names translate to smth that’s a one word meaning makes me wonder if miraaks name is supposed to mean smth specific by ‘allegiance guide’. like. idk. it’s late i need to go to bed.
thank you so much for this good food🙏🙏🙏🙏😭💞
Wow, I meant to make the miraak smut I’m writing short and sweet (I even cut out a proper undressing scene and everything) yet here I am at roughly 600+ words and the pegging hasn’t even began. You all best better be ready, I’m really liking this one and I think it may be done sometime either tomorrow or the next day 😉
i wish everyone who makes up lore and intricate storylines for poorly written / under developed / side / minor characters a very pleasant evening