The Cadre - Tumblr Posts
Maeve: So how'd you convince the Cadre to betray me? What'd you offer them?
Aelin: I asked them if they wanted to embarrass you, and they instantly said yes.
Aelin to the Cadre: If any of you cross me, I’m gonna kick the testicles clean off your body. Clean off. You’ll look like Ken dolls down there!
Lorcan, abt Maeve: What did I tell you about calling your Queen the devil?
Fenrys: That it’s offensive to the devil?
Aelin: I don't need you protecting me.
Rowan: I know.
Aelin: So, clearly what you're saying is you need me protecting you.
Rowan: Clearly. You know me so well.
Rowan, desperately trying to save Dorian: Highness, with all due respect, Aelin will kill me if I let you die, so I'm dead either way.
Aelin: If you want my advice-
Dorian: No offense but you're the last person I want relationship advice from. You tried to kill your husband. Multiple times.
Aelin: First off, that was before we started dating. Secondly, he also tried to kill me.
Rowan: It's true. It was mutual attempted murder.
Aelin: I would say I outdid myself, but I’m always this good, so I simply did myself.
Aelin: I must say, Rowan, you're a very lucky male.
Aelin: If I died-
Rowan, sharpening his knives: Death will not get you out of this relationship.
Rowan: Do you have a bobby pin?
Lorcan: Yeah. *searches in his hair* Lorcan: Oh, no, wait. I’m not a nine-year-old girl.
Fenrys: Really? Then why do ya throw like one?
Aelin & Rowan: Surprise! We're having a baby!
Fenrys: What?!
Aelin & Rowan: *pulls out adoption papers* It's you!
Aelin: Hey, Dorian. These candies you gave me? They sucked.
Dorian: But you ate them all.
Aelin: I had to make sure they all sucked.
Lorcan, about Aelin: That girl is a hurricane.
Rowan: Hah, yeah, she sure is.
Lorcan: Hurricanes are bad, Whitethorn.
Rowan: Hey, Lorcan sneezes like a girl!
Lorcan: And how about I pound you like a boy--nope, that didn’t come out right.
(Aelin wheezing in the background)
Dorian: Rowan, I think you should play the role of my father.
Rowan: I don't want to be your father.
Dorian: That's perfect. You already know your lines.
Rowan, after explaining a plan: Any questions?
Aedion: Why did my dad leave me?
Aelin: Is it possible for me to carry even more concealed daggers than I already am?
Fenrys: Why is it toothpaste not teethpaste?
Dorian: Can I fuck myself in female form?
Chaol: Why did my mother never try to get in contact with me?
Lysandra: What do I really look like?
Lorcan: WILL ELIDE EVER LOVE ME?
Elide: WILL LORCAN EVER LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE?
Gavriel: Will Aedion ever forgive me?
Manon: WILL ABRAXOS EVER STOP PLAYING IN THE FUCKING FLOWERS
Rowan: About the plan, guys, questions about the plan.