Thoughts Before Bed - Tumblr Posts
Quick note before I go to bed...
I'm tempted to make more lists of my interests and then embed them into my pinned post somewhere like I did with my old account, but I dunno, we'll see.
Like, if I say who all my biases are or whatever, will that make people want to stay and get to know me better or nah?
Or like, say I try to make a compilation of songs I love most so I might actually have an answer if people ask what my favorite song or singer is
Alright, hopefully that cleans things up a bit. I'll add more stuff later, but right now it's almost 6AM and I need sleep
Why must I love so many things? The lists I'm making are never gonna end
H E L P
Why am I like this
Miwa is so relatable and I love her, heh
Just a little update post for those interested. I'm really investing a lot in the characters and honestly I'm fighting back tears right now :'>
The manga is just so real and I can understand everyone's struggles, which I guess is one part of why I'm enjoying it so much.
To try keeping things short (but I apologize if it turns into a rant), I've had terrible and I mean TERRIBLE relationships in the past. I've had to learn things the hard way, and I've gotten so many things wrong. I look back on my past self and I wish I could tell my younger self what I know now. If I could, I'd love to have save myself from dealing with all the heartbreak and trauma and stuff like that.. But y'know, you also have to be grateful for experiencing all the chaos. Like, yeah, it's awful and I've been close to death a few times due to everything, but all that has made me who I am today. Even though I'm still miserable, I'm happier than I was. And I'm glad I have a better understanding as to what I need in life, y'know?
Anyway, just know that I'm loving How Do We Relationship? because yes indeed, how does one relationship?
My rough sketch I guess you’d call it, heh. I’ll fix and add some things later but I wanted your opinion of the design so far @matchasofia
I took some liberties and made a little starfish beanie cuz I didn’t know how to go about the hair, and I just thought it was cute so why not
The octopus is one of those shoulder-rider plush things, and I tried adding a cravat to represent the coral pipe beard..(?)
If there’s anything you want me to change, please let me know and I’ll figure something else out ^-^
But anyway, it’s like 4 in the morning and I’m so tired, heh
could you draw hornacle in orange?
this design here is made by @monstersbesinging
Yeah, sure thing ^-^ I'll do my best, thank you for the submission 💚
Just finished Chapter 30 and I wanted to put my thoughts and feelings out there, so don't mind me
Again, this manga is making me cry a h h h
It hurts me just as much as the other characters while I read this cuz I've experienced the same things and I subconsciously relive those terrible memories along with them T^T Like, I have to limit how much I read before I start going mental
Why does love and maintaining a relationship have to be so complicated? All these different feelings and not knowing how to deal with them, it just sucks. Having a rough past and having it affect your current lifestyle so much.. Just- UGH, this manga is so real and I have a love-hate relationship with it right now
*sigh* I'm hoping things start looking up for the two as I continue reading, but with my luck, I wouldn't be surprised to see more of my life experiences on the pages. Please please please no one start harming themselves and the other is forced to just watch it unfold in front of them and there's nothing they can do to stop it. And then it gets to a point where the person harming themselves tries different ways to kill themselves and then they're in the hospital all hooked up to heart monitors and stuff cuz they went and tried to OD, making the other feel guilty and feel forced to do whatever in order to keep them from self-sabotaging their life further. PLEASE, I can't go through that again
Noooo, don't have Miwa feel just like I did back in middle school T^T
I mean, I still want to die but..
Part of me wants to stop reading because my heart is seriously hurting when I see stuff like this happen, especially if it's stuff I personally went through too.
Ugh, I'm so conflicted. I kinda also want to continue reading in hopes that things do in fact get better and then I can have an easier time falling asleep, but who knows what's gonna happen next. Please, please, let the girls be happy. I beg of you
So I'm caught up on all the chapters so far, but updates are coming soon! I'm so glad I didn't give up reading this, yes there's been more really rough stuff, but things are finally starting to look up again. Let's just hope I don't jinx it >.> *knocks on wood*
Side note, this one Miwa panel has me thinking of the old lady / young lady optical illusion thing, heh
Why is Miwa so relatable, someone please help me I'm crying
Gotta get my vaccines early in the morning, oof
I'll try to get some sleep but if I can't, I guess I'm reading more manga heh
Someone, please help, I've been given shots and I'm dying
Finished Chapter 16 and just- a h h h h
Kanoko, it's not looking good for you >.>
A'ight, it's 4am and I'm done looking for now. I'll continue adding games I'm interested in later and I'll figure out a schedule eventually. I'm trying to stay in a general area here, like the majority of games I have are either about something Japanese or involves cats, but I might just have to add everything and then sort it out later. Work smarter not harder, right? Ugh
I need to start forcing myself to do things for my future career and stuff, and I don't like it
So adding onto this, I just wanna have a little post here to kinda brainstorm ideas
It's been at least a week since I last streamed something, so I wanna make up for my lack of content. And y'know, try to post more regularly.. >.> Plus, October's coming up so if things go well, I'll be able to cover several horror-related games (y'know, in the spirit of things).
So starting off, there's Late Homework which says roughly takes a half-hour to finish. As of the moment I post this, I'll skim through my Itch.io list and see what like-minded games I may be able to group it with. But it might be better to just keep it on its lonesome, I dunno. That's a future-me problem, heh.
Anyway, I'll be adding onto this with reblogs later
More idea time, yaaay~
Ideas for October Streaming Thematics:
MONDAY
Maniacal Mondays
Murderous Mondays
Mild Mondays
Mentally ill Mondays
(add more later if I think of anything)
TUESDAY
Terror Tuesdays
Torturous Tuesdays
(add more later if I think of anything)
WEDNESDAY
Witchy Wednesdays
Wacky Wednesdays
"Why am I doing this?" Wednesdays
(add more later if I think of anything)
THURSDAY
Retro-back (retro-styled throwback) Thursdays
Thriller Thursdays
(add more later if I think of anything)
FRIDAY
Freaky Fridays
Freakshow Fridays
Facing my Fears Fridays
(add more later if I think of anything)
SATURDAY (may be interchangeable with Sunday)
Scared Saturdays
Short-Horror Saturdays
Slasher Saturdays
Suspense Saturdays
(add more later if I think of anything)
SUNDAY (may be interchangeable with Saturday)
Spooky Sundays
Spellbinding Sundays
Silly Sundays
(add more later if I think of anything)
So like, I know I shouldn't push myself too hard and I don't NEED to play as many games as possible throughout the entire month, but I'll do as much as I can cuz I better work, bitch
Sigh, the struggles of being a livestreamer with 99 problems and I'm all of them
More idea time, yaaay~
Ideas for October Streaming Thematics:
MONDAY
Maniacal Mondays
Murderous Mondays
Mild Mondays
Mentally ill Mondays
(add more later if I think of anything)
TUESDAY
Terror Tuesdays
Torturous Tuesdays
(add more later if I think of anything)
WEDNESDAY
Witchy Wednesdays
Wacky Wednesdays
"Why am I doing this?" Wednesdays
(add more later if I think of anything)
THURSDAY
Retro-back (retro-styled throwback) Thursdays
Thriller Thursdays
(add more later if I think of anything)
FRIDAY
Freaky Fridays
Freakshow Fridays
Facing my Fears Fridays
(add more later if I think of anything)
SATURDAY (may be interchangeable with Sunday)
Scared Saturdays
Short-Horror Saturdays
Slasher Saturdays
Suspense Saturdays
(add more later if I think of anything)
SUNDAY (may be interchangeable with Saturday)
Spooky Sundays
Spellbinding Sundays
Silly Sundays
(add more later if I think of anything)
*Sigh* I'm getting burnt out just skimming through Itch.io and adding games to different collections for future convenience. Like, I should've thought about this and started working on it earlier. Ugggghhh
I'd like to follow through with my original plan, but I don't want to stress myself out being like "IT'S MONDAY AND THAT MEANS THE ONLY GAMES I CAN PLAY ARE ABOUT [ xyz ]"
And ultimately, I've decided that it's best to keep it one game per stream cuz people are more drawn to shorter videos, right? Cuz if I do my usual planning, say like 3 short games in one long stream, I want to say people are more likely to watch them separately than all together. So that means they'll either skip on watching it entirely or only watch the game that stands out to them and ignoring the rest of the video. Cuz like, if you're like me, you'll end up watching several anime episodes back-to-back and then you realize you could've watched a movie or two in that time instead. Y'know what I mean? So yeah, shorter and separate is probably my better option overall but I dunno.
As for the longer, more story-rich games like J-RPGs, I don't want to think about limiting how long my streams are. Like "two hours per sitting max" or whatever. Just let me play and if it's too long for others to watch and enjoy, then dagnabbit and shame on me.
Anyway, I'll continue searching for games and hopefully I can maintain my thematic idea, but again, I'll probably end up just playing whatever to not put so much pressure on myself. I want streaming to be fun and not so soul-crushing like actual jobs are. Like, this is why I don't draw as much anymore cuz it feels like a job and I can't do things at my own pace, or I need everything I make to look absolutely perfect. It's just not fun that way and that s u c k s
Why must life be so rough, god damn