Tw Ed Thoughts - Tumblr Posts

27 April - Day 12

Normally, like if I wasn't dieting? I'd eat pancakes or two bowls of cereal after 10am for breakfast. At 3/4pm I'd have something like bread with butter, peanut butter, and honey or jam, depending. Maybe I'd have noodles with an egg instead. Then, for supper, I'd have whatever is going, like mince and spaghetti or curry and rice. After that, I'd have cookie dough made from flour, cocoa, sugar, butter, and milk. Maybe tea or cocoa to end it off.

My mom knows!! (Forced recovery)

Hi there! I don't know who you are, but I need your help. My mom just stated that she knows that I'm not eating properly and she's going to start making me breakfast and lunch, that on top of what I eat now, which is dinner.

I'm 155cm with a bmi of 22.2. I try to stick to 500 cal a day, I don't exercise really, I drink 2l of water. I'm going to be upping my daily limit to about 1200 because of my mom.

How do I continue to lose at least 0.5 kgs a week?

30 April - Day 13

I am losing weight by heavy restricting, so probably not a healthy way of losing weight..

01 May - Day 14

My ugw is 45kgs. I hope to reach it by the time I move overseas.

Ps. Once again, I answered these almost a month ago. So this is an update: losing the weight that I gained is taking a lot longer than I thought it would, I will not reach my ugw by mid-June. Also, my mom is making me eat about 700 cals more, so I won't lose much more. Nevertheless, I won't give up that easy and will keep you all updated✨️

02 May - Day 15

I would like to be vegan because that allows for fewer calories, but my mom would never allow it for that same reason. Plus, it's so expensive to be vegan.

Hi 05 May - Day 16

The first first time thst i decided to lose weight was in 2014. The second real time was when in 2019. The third real time was last year in July. This time started mid-April.

06 May - Day 17

Yes. I think it's been going on for enough years now for me to feel like I have an 3d. Although, maybe it's just disordered eating but not quite a disorder.

08 May - Day 18

My food weakness.. Usually, I'd say things like ramen noodles, ice cream, or chocolate. But I've been very good at saying no to those things recently. There was even sushi today, and I said no. Pizza is very hard for me to say no to. And starbucks drinks. Gin. Milkshakes. A lot, actually..

09 May - Day 19

The last time I ate fast food was on the 24th of April, so about two weeks ago. I'll be eating at a sort of fast food restaurant on the 14th of May for Mother's Day. However, I'll be getting a steak and salad, so maybe not fast food even if it's out?

10 May - Day 20

My favourite diet is one where I'm able to eat healthy most of the time and enjoy an occasional treat, like maybe once a week, or a small one every night, all within my calorie limit. Basically, what I'm doing now. I just wish I could have a slightly higher calorie intake and still lose weight fast!

11 May - Day 21

I'm at a weird in between place at the moment. My top is a medium, my leggings are a medium but medium is slightly too big, my jeans I'd say are a 34. Everything is different depending on what it is and where it comes from.

12 May - Day 22

My lw last time was 46 (101.4), I gained because I was forced into recovery, and then it got out of hand. This time, I got to 48, and then I allowed myself free days over Christmas, and that got out of hand for a few months.

13 May - Day 23

Oh yeah, one hundred percent. I feel like if I hadn't known Barbie or Daphne or the portrayal of bullying of fat people on TV, I wouldn't want to be smaller. I'd see the main characters who looked like me, and I wouldn't question it. Instead, the side characters are larger than the MCs, and I know it's because the producers and directors are forced to be inclusive. People are forced to include people like me. I don't want people to feel like they're forced to like me because they pity my size.

This doesn't make as much sense to me now, but I can't think of a better way to word it..

14 May - Day 24

I don't really like the terms 'pro-x'. I do not support this mental illness at all. The same way I don't support depression or anxiety. I couldn't say, "Oh, that's great, you should join the group where we are all going to k!ll ourselves at the same time." I support the people, absolutely! I will love you through this. It's horrible that we have this illness. But I do not support ana or mia as a lifestyle. We're not some fad diet to be on the side of, WE ARE SICK. 

15 May - Day 25

I have purged before, in 2020. I had started gaining weight because my mom had forced me into recovery. I hated how much I was gaining, and I wanted to it to stop. The first time I purged, my gran had brought some banana muffins, I ate three without thinking, and then I realized what I'd done. I started panicking and rushed to the toilet, and tried to purge. To this day, I can't help but think of that moment. I continued for a few weeks to a few months, but I eventually stopped. I never purge anymore.

June me here, don't purge guys. There's only so much harm reduction you can do. Many of us thought we wouldn't even be here years later, but we are and have to pay the price of our younger selves who thought it didn't matter!

19 May - Day 26

I'm most excited to be able to not feel self-conscious. My body shape is kind of odd because I'm a pear shape with hip dips, short legs, and a long torso and "ciao so anyways." Nevertheless, when I lose weight, my chest shrinks, my collar bones and shoulders and neck look smooth and sharp, and my face thins right down. I look good in spaghetti straps and bikini tops, etc.

June me here: YES! THIS IS TRUE! I've lost almost 2kgs (seems like not a lot, but it is on me) since the 19th, and I'm already more confident and happier taking pics, etc!

20 May - Day 27

If I'm at home and there's food being cooked for everyone and I've been asked if I want, I become quite anxious, my eyes dart about, and my chest constricts a little. I'll say no if I think I can get away without being asked further questions. If I'm in the kitchen with food, I'll make some tea and get out as quickly as possible. If I'm out with other people, I'm pretty easy, I just say I don't want any food and that I already ate or I will eat at home.

June me here: the best thing is when I cook supper for my family. I know exactly how many calories per serving, etc. That's when I'm most at ease around food.

I think I should go in the Guinness World Records for how much a 5'1 gal can eat in 2 hours..

But fr like how did I do that??

Drinking game:

Every time you see a post saying you should drink water, take a sip. I'm 500mls down so far :D

Low calorie noodles? Like at bare minimum under 200?