@na Trigger - Tumblr Posts

Part of being on edblr is accepting that I have the most thought provoking, sensational and well-written drafts ever; yet my poetry skills and deep reflections have to stay drafts otherwise I lose my account for “promoting unhealthy and unsafe behaviours”

Also my pjs now smell of cigs so that’s great. Words of wisdom from someone who’s been awake since 4pm.. it’s almost 5am

Main blog: @luxies-babydolls

I'll make this longer when I can but please, if you don't already have an ed or are trying to recover from one then please leave my blog. This is not the sort of thing I'd want anyone else to deal with, my life is no longer mine it sometimes feels and I've made peace with the fact that this is my struggle to survive. For anyone who’s just starting out, please try talking to someone or doing this the healthy way; this is coming from someone whose life has been somewhat ruined by the not-so-fun aspects of having severe body image issues and strong negative feelings towards food. Your want to lose weight and be healthier is okay, and can be done in a way that doesn’t sacrifice your very sense of self.

My blog is a space for me to talk about all the aspects of my ed; im not trying to tell anyone to do what I do, simply sharing my experiences with a restrictive ed and trying to find people who understand the complicated, crazy, addictive, controlling mess that this can be. Stay safe everyone 🩷

Lila xx

Basic info about me~

Age: 17

Fav colour: pink

Fav diet drink: ultra strawberry dreams (sugar-free monster)

Hobbies/interests: reading, exercise, fashion, writing, dancing, makeup, thrifting, calling my bf, hanging out with friends

Fav singers: Lana Del Rey, Britney Spears, ElysianSoul, Hole

Starting a new diet : breakfast is air, lunch is a diet coke and dinner I get to lick an apple and dessert is crying while looking at a picture of myself naked.

I am soooo pissed my acc got deleted. I was having a horrendous day and went to lay in my bed and scroll tumblr and my acc was gone. fuck all the whores deleting my shit OVER AND OVER. I’m not gonna fucking leave bitch!! NO MATTER WHAT FUCKING KOKOBOT YOU SEND MY WAY NO MATTER HOW MANY FUCKING TIMES THIS SHIT GETS TERMINATED IDC I’ll be back.

honestly half the ED movies and shows look like shit and are boring as hell, but if you want something where you’ll be entertained and triggered just watch Fleabag. Lots of eating disorder mentions and just skinny ass people in general. It’s great 💋💋

I’m awful!

my family is my thinspo… I can’t stand being compared to them or being told I look like them. It just fuels my eating disorder’s fire to a zillion! One day we will be completely non comparable trust 🤞😋

anybody remember the group chats on here? I miss them so much oml. It was so nice to connect with people who were going through the same thing as you, and to be able to have people who really know how this feels. We didn’t even talk about our disorders much, just all of us connecting with each other, and sharing music and talking about our lives. It was so electric and fun istg, I wish they’d come back. I lost all the people I knew on here after my account got banned. I miss having people who know what I’m going through. 🤍🤍

hiii my previous account got t-worded and i lost all my moots:(

my user was justprincessstuff and you might have seen some of my post like "i'd rather be skinny and depressed rather than fat and depressed" wether you used to know me or not, please do follow to be moots cus i miss you guys😭

MY SIBLING JUST SENT THIS TO ME HELP???

when did food stop being just food?

no cus why are so many ppl glamourising eds and calling it STARVEMAXXING like huh???

you guys i went to the mall today for fnaf and the place was packed with ppl my age and everyone was SO PRETTY AND SKINNY😭 literally irl thinspo all around me fr

like i wore a dress and makeup today and regretted it so bad cus i couldn't stop thinking of the "lipstick on a pig" quote...

also a group of ppl my age openly pointed at me and laughed as i walked by like help???

does anyone else get a headache after they vape?? if so any advice on how to stop it pls🙏🏻

i would give up SO MUCH to have my little sister's metabolism

she can eat bread, pasta, rice in one sitting plus desset AND STILL be so skinny...

i obviously lost the genetic lottery💀

why is pretending to eat so damn exhausting 😩

am i the only one who has a full blown meltdown when i someone's meal is smaller than mine??

idc if it has way more calories than my meal or if i ate less than half their intake that day if their meal is significantly smaller i go crazy...

this is a reminder for myself that maintaining is better than gaining.

maintaining is better than gaining.

as someone with an ed i subconsciously became so aware of other people's eating habits

i notice when they just push around their food around their plate or when they eat smaller portions than normal and wonder are they a picky eater or have an ed?

or when they go to the bathroom soon after a meal and i wonder are they throwing up or just have to use the bathroom?

and when they eat so much food in one sitting and i wonder are they just hungry and have a fast metabolism or did they binge eat?

and i feel so guilty all the time because one of the first things that always pops into my mind is that...

"i can't let them be better/thinner than me."

starving on your period makes you feel a different type of rage

as much as a love visiting my sister's house, it's always so horrible because they always try to feed me😭

like i know it's their love language but goddammit it's my hate language or whatever cus i keep thinking they're trying to get me fat or something💀

no kidding they pile food onto my plate and get kinda offended if i can't finish