What Did I Just Read - Tumblr Posts
I’ll never not be amused by the fact that I can drop the words “crucifix nail nipples” into a conversation and some of you who have been with me since the livejournal days will join me in the flashbacks, screaming and crying all the way.
I don't know how to feel right now !!!!!!!!!
* screaming internally *
Human Error
jungkook | bts » 13331 words » angst/fluff | robot!au
» this is a repost from my old blog @seokvie ~ ^_^
Keep reading
holy fuck this is the yammiest thing i’ve read all year YAMMY YAMMY YUMMY YUMMY OH MY GOD this will be getting reread every day believe me
Kitty
bangchan x fem! reader
warnings! MDNI18+, DD/LG (AGEPLAY), PIV, no protection, pussing eating, slight pussy play, brief pussy slapping, cumming inside, reader refers to pussy as a 'kitty', reader refers to cum as 'pee' (no actual piss), reader acts extremely innocent/naive, HUGE daddy kink, multiple orgasms implied(f!rec), crying during sex (f!), tummy bulge (if you squint), there will be a brief aftermath provided!, brief intro to the play, reader pretends to be asleep (pls lemme know if I missed any!)
notes! my fics are fantasy and are not meant to represent the members in anyway. you've read the warnings and if you wish to proceed it's by your volition. read this before you continue. other than that, enjoy :)
3.5k words | 3.7k (aftermath included)
Maybe you should have had Chan specify what he meant by calling his own kink weird, but you didn't. Everyone has a 'thing' they like to do in the bedroom, strange or not. You've been with Chan long enough to comfortably engage in several different techniques in the bedroom, but this was one...different.
"We don't have to if you don't want to," your boyfriend notices the confused look on your face. "Not everyone likes it and I know it's weird as fuck. It doesn't matter if-"
You put your hand up, effectively stopping him from continuing. "No no no! It's not that. I just...I've never really heard of that before." You're not sure if your words make him feel at ease, but his shoulders relax slightly. "Yeah, it's...a play more or less. A role-play, but we don't have to if you don't want to."
He's being honest, you know this. Chan would never make you do anything you're not comfortable with, and your intimate life is already amazing. Engaging in this...play is just a fantasy for him. It won't make or break your relationship.
"I never said I didn't want to," you try and stay neutral about the situation. "It's just new to me. I'll think about it, okay?"
And think about it you did. It was on your mind days after the conversation. All you could think about was how different it was compared to the normal sex routine you guys had. Even if the topic was hardly brought up, you did your own research. Learning about safe words, titles, and, seemingly the most important part, the acting.
Video after video, there was a consistent theme. This 'daddy' was always in control and the 'little girl' did nearly everything she was told to. Feigning innocence in a way that made you squeamish, but weirdly aroused.
It's different, yes, but doable. Chan and you are adults, this is merely roleplaying. It's not until a week later than you tell him you're okay with it. He's surprised, in denial even.
"Are you sure?" He can't help but double-check. "If you're doing this just to please me, you don't have to. I'm totally fine with how things are now."
You're already shaking your head before he finishes, "I'm not doing it just to please you. I really wanna try it. It seems interesting," Your boyfriend takes a deep breath, finally nodding.
"Okay, when did you want to try it?"
-
It's definitely weird laying in bed knowing you're going to get fucked. You stare at the ceiling of your bedroom, anticipation eating you. There isn't a set plan other than waiting for Chan to come through the door while you pretend to sleep. You told him you should just go with what feels good, but now you're wishing you had a script.
The sheets feel soft against your smooth legs when you twist and turn. You're wearing one of your crop tops and a simple pair of panties. To be fair, you didn't have a costume for the special occasion, but you tried.
Your mind begins to wander just when the door opens. A ray of light from the hallway streams on the ceiling and you snap your eyes shut. Your stomach flips as you hear Chan take the first few steps in. His feet shuffle closer until you feel the bed dip and you're trying your absolute best not to move.
Chan carefully lifts the blanket, tossing it on the other side of you to expose your legs to the cold air. Your body moves before your brain recognizes it. You rub your thighs together, trying to stay warm and turning your back to Chan while curling your legs comfortably.
A part of you thinks you've fucked up by going into a fetal position, but you soon feel Chan's heavy hand rest on your hip. His thumb rubs gentle circles over your skin before sliding it down your thigh, squeezing the plush flesh.
His fingers dig pleasurably, leaving subtle fingermarks on your skin.
Chan gets bold, reaching over you and finding the waistband of your underwear. He goes past the top, tracing the top of your pelvis before sliding his hand back out.
You can't help yourself from squirming even if you want to. A small whimper makes its way past you and you try and cover it up with a yawn. Chan chuckles at your attempt, grabbing you by the hips to put you flat on your back.
He pushes your thighs apart, exposing your clothed cunt to him. Chan trails his hand up until it cups your pussy, gently applying pressure. It's not enough for actual pleasure, but it makes you blink your eyes open, pretending to wake up.
Chan sits beside you, eyes locking where his hand plays with you. You slowly lead your hand to his wrist, taking hold of it.
"Cha-daddy," you blink at him, feigning confusion. "What are you doing?"
If Chan noticed your slip-up, he doesn't say anything about it. "Daddy's just playing with his girl. Is that okay?" He looks at you and you can tell something is different in his eyes. There's a type of hunger you haven't seen before. Almost ravening. You feel genuinely small under his gaze.
"I...it feels funny," your voice is small. Truthfully, you're not sure what you're supposed to say. You're just mimicking what other people have said in the pornos you've watched, but judging from Chan's expression, you're doing good.
Chan hums, opting to use the tip of his finger rather than his palm. "Where? Here?" He presses his digit against your core. Your thighs shake and your hips slightly jolt. You nod, "Yes. It feels funny there."
Chan - no - your daddy nods in approval, "It feels like that because I'm playing with it. Does it hurt?"
Even in character, your lover is always making sure you're okay. "No Daddy," you bat your eyes at him. "Doesn't hurt at all. It feels..." you trail off. Chan has started tracing the shape of your pussy, his finger going over your clit and between your lips.
Chan smiles, "Feels like what?" You get shy, turning your head the other way. Your daddy's having none it that though. His finger pulls away for a second before it's his palm you feel. He smacks your cunt just enough to make you squeal.
Chan! "Daddy!" You nearly yell his name. Your legs move to close, but Chan's faster, prying them apart as you squirm.
"I asked you a question, baby." Chan tuts at you. "You should listen to your daddy when he speaks." Normally, you would laugh at his cheesy line, but you're starting to float into a different headspace when you find yourself nodding instead, " 'M sorry! Sorry, Daddy."
Satisfied, Chan smoothes his hand over your cunt as if in apology. "That's okay, baby. You can answer Daddy's question now. What does it feel like?" This time, you find solace in his forgiving touch. "It feels good."
Something vibrates in Chan's chest similar to a purr. He rubs you a little harder, making your hips try and match his movements.
"Ohhh," you sigh dreamily. "I like that." Your hips shift up and down, making his hand slide against your slit. The underwear slowly begins to get soaked from your arousal and you're sure Chan can feel it through the material. He lets your hips rock a little more before pulling his hand away, making you whine.
"Daddy!" You pick your head up. "I was feeling really good!" Chan smiles at your frustrated tone, finding it both cute and amusing how deep you're in character. He crawls on the bed, putting either hand over each of your legs and lowering himself to his chest.
"Daddy can make you feel even better," he gives you a cheeky smile. "You want that?"
Immediately, you nod. Your legs begin to widen to make room for Chan to lay on his tummy, his face to your cunt. He places his hand on the inner parts of your thighs to massage the skin there, his fingers tickling your skin.
"You're so wet here, baby. Got your underwear all dirty. We should take them off." You nod obediently, lifting your hips so Chan can slide the panties down. A string of arousal connects from the material to your pussy. The air feels uncomfortably cold, and you can't help but voice your concerns to Chan, "Daddy, my kitty's cold."
Chan discards your soiled underwear on the floor, finally propping himself on his elbows to hook them around the underside of your thighs. "Aw, I'm sorry baby," he brings his lips close to your core. "Daddy can warm it up."
The feel of his tongue sends shivers down your spine. He starts at the entrance of your pussy before licking towards the very top, flicking your clit before he descends back down. You hum at the sensation, burying yourself deep into the pillow. Chan keeps his tongue flat against your cunt, lapping up your pussy with long kitten licks.
With your knees bent, you spread them fully apart to give Chan full access. The warm pleasure from his tongue makes you mewl, gripping the sheets and making your back cave into the bed. "Daddyy," you whimper his name. "Daddy you're so good."
Chan looks up at you, using one of his hands to splay across the exposed part of your tummy. He watches your pretty face contort in pleasure, mouth open as even prettier sounds leave it. His tongue finds your bud and swirls it in his mouth, feeling the way your stomach tenses in his hold.
You're unbelievably, wet. The arousal drip onto the sheets, your ass, his chin. Though Chan's tongue makes you feel unexplainably good, you can't but feel empty. Your cunt clenches around nothing which only makes you feel restless.
Strategically, you move your hands to thread them in Chan's curly hair, earning a groan from him.
"Daddy?" You call out to him. It takes a moment for him to pull away from your cunt. Chan seems to struggle with getting your pussy out of his mouth. He softly sucks on your clit, lolling his tongue on your flesh leisurely. It's not until you tug on his hair that he finally lets up.
He has a frown on his glistening face as he lifts his head, "You know that Daddy was busy, baby. It's not very nice of you to interrupt like that." It's unsettling to see Chan upset, even if he's playing a character. You want to please him in any way possible and you feel a little dejected seeing him like this.
"I- I didn't mean to," you make your voice small. "Are you...mad at me?"
The expression on Chan's face softens and he squeezes your stomach affectionally. "No baby, I would never be mad at you. You're doing such a good job for me. Daddy just loves giving your kitty kisses, that's all. I didn't mean to make you sad."
Maybe it's because you're so deep in the scene, but his words bring you comfort. It feels as though your main source of pleasure is his pleasure. You've never experienced this type of dynamic with Chan, but it's far from uncomfortable. You want him to take care of you, to praise you, to use you. The only way you can make sure you feel good is to make him feel good.
"You promise?" You peer into his eyes with unfiltered emotion. "You promise you're not mad at me?" For reassurance, Chan kisses your thigh. His lips trail across your pussy to get to the other leg. "I promise baby," he pecks your skin again. "You can tell Daddy what you wanted to say earlier."
You nod, "I really like it when you kiss my kitty Daddy. I really, really do. But my tummy feels so...empty. Is that supposed to feel funny too?" When you say it like that, you don't even need to bat your eyelashes at Chan for him to surrender to your request. He pauses for a moment, thinking. "I think I get it. Does it tickle on the inside?"
You nod again.
Chan hums, pretending to be deep in thought. "That's normal too, baby. Daddy can keep giving you kisses, but I don't think that'll be enough. Here, I have an idea."
Silently, you watch as he props himself on his knees, lifting his shirt over his head only to be left in boxers. The outline of his cock is noticeable and even in the barely lit-up room, you're sure you can see it gathering slick from his tip.
Chan hooks his thumbs under the waistband of his boxers and pulls them down. Inch by inch, he lowers them until his cock springs free, slapping his abdomen.
You gasp, "Daddy! That's so big!" And you're not lying. You've seen Chan's cock countless times, but it seems extra big as he knee-walks closer to you and places himself between your thighs. He strokes himself, pulling on his cock until the skin covers his tip and dragging it back down. "It's supposed to be big because it's gonna help you not feel empty anymore. It'll help with those tickles in your stomach too."
Chan uses his thumb to press his dick to your cunt, catching your clit in the process. You whine when it slides against your folds, "Ooo, daddy. Those feel like your kisses."
He giggles, trailing his cock a little lower until it catches your entrance. "It's gonna feel much better than kisses, baby."
The head of his cock easily slides in your cunt. You pick your head up and watch as Chan fucks the first few inches of his length in you. His thrusts and shallow and quick, but it's enough to make you raise your legs off the bed.
"Daddy! Daddy, daddy, daddy! It's in me! You're in me!" You can't tear your eyes away from where your bodies connect. You can feel him sink in deeper. You can feel how your pussy deliciously stretches around his girth. Chan grabs each of your ankles and hooks your legs over his shoulders. Your cunt has opened perfectly for him, it takes one more move of his hips before he's settled deep inside you.
Your legs shake and you can feel Chan's tip just below your belly button. You try and open your mouth to speak, but all you can do is squeal and moan.
"Not an 'it', baby. It's called a cock. Can you say cock for me?" Chan slowly thrusts in you. He rocks his body gently, sliding in before pulling a few inches out. You want to do what your daddy says, but it's so hard to. Talking is nearly impossible with how deeply he's grinding into you. Yet, you tilt your head up to properly give him what he wants.
"C-c-cock. D-daddy's cock is in- in me," your teary eyes lock with his dominating ones. Chan smiles at you, lowering himself until you're nearly chest-to-chest. He feels blissfully deep in you like that with your legs still hooked over his shoulders. You weren't even aware that you could bend like this, but Chan has you doing the impossible.
The only warning you're given is a chaste kiss to the lips before he slams his hips into yours. Chan gives you no room to recover as he builds speed rather quickly. The pleasure from his cock burying itself inside you repeatedly is too much too fast, but you know your daddy wouldn't give you something you couldn't really handle.
Small uh-uh-uhs and gasps mix the sounds of your bodies connecting. It's too overwhelming for you to scream and moan, but Chan still can form coherent sentences as he groans mere inches from your face. "Tight little pussy. Daddy loves putting his cock in your kitty."
Meaning to or not, Chan puts his weight on your bent legs. The burning stretch strangely adds to the pleasure building in your stomach.
"Say it again," his eyes are dark when he looks at you. "Tell me who's cock is in your pussy."
It takes a moment to recognize the hot tears sliding down your face, salty on your lips. "You! It's you! Daddy's cock is in my little pussy. Daddy's cock feels so good in my kitty."
Chan's chest thunders with approval and he sits up straight to grip on of your thighs instead. Your legs are no longer being squished, but this angle gives Chan free rein on your cunt. The entire bed rocks with his powerful thrusts and you can hear the headboard hitting the wall rather expensively.
If you look down, you're sure you would be able to see Chan poke through your tummy, but you can't. Chan has a rough grip on your chin forcing you to look up at him. He drinks in your expression, the way your jaw drops, how your eyes roll to the back of your head. He's fucking you good and he knows it. Just the feel of your wet, soft walls tells him.
You don't want to cum, not without your daddy. But the hot pleasure stings so good that your cunt clenches onto him for stability. The slick between your legs grows louder, wetter, and dirtier. The fire reaches your chest and you swear you might explode.
"I'm gonna pee!" You suddenly gasp. "Daddy wait! I'm gonna pee!"
But he doesn't wait. Your daddy doesn't even slow down. His cock keeps hitting that gummy spot in your stomach that makes you cry out with each thrust. Even with those pretty tears sliding down your face, Chan doesn't stop fucking you.
"Oh, babyy," he sounds too sweet. "That's not pee. You're gonna cum. You're cum all over Daddy's cock and make a mess."
Logically, he's right, You're familiar with this feeling, but you can't seem to properly label it. All you know is your tummy is feeling warm and you think it'll feel good to let go.
"Is daddy-," you hiccup. "Is Daddy gonna pee too?"
Chan tuts, "What did I just say, baby?"
"Cum," you correct yourself. "Is Daddy gonna cum in my kitty?"
Chan breathlessly laughs and then nods. "Fuck yes. Daddy's gonna cum in your cunt over and over again. This is Daddy's pussy, you understand? This. Is. Mine." Every word is enunciated with a thrust. Your entire body shifts upwards onto the bed, but Chan's form dominates you regardless.
It feels like you're at a high. Your orgasm finally topples over when Chan takes his hand off your face to put it on your clit instead. His thumb presses down and swirls over your nub as your legs shake and tremble. "Daddy!" You look down at your pussy when you see his cock painted white every time he slides out. "Daddy I'm cumming! Feels so good to cum on daddy's cock. Don't stop, please please please..." It's all babbling as he fucks you through it.
Chan collects salvia in his mouth before spitting on your clit for more lubrication. He kneads his thumb on your swollen lips while pistoning his hips in and out of you. "Pussy squeezing me so tight. Fuck!" He groans. You keep your legs obediently spread as his sloppy thrusts finally come to a halt. He presses his cock deep, tip hitting your womb as warmth fills you.
The thumb on your clit falters, but it still manages to bring you to another high. Your head spins from the back-to-back orgasms, but you hardly mind the feeling when Chan's seed settles deep inside you.
He moans, staying content in your cunt as he unloads. "Good pussy," he grunts. Chan places his hands on your hips to ride out his high, fucking you not as hard but steadily. It feels euphoric to have his cock keep filling you, but your moans into whines with every thrust. "Mmm~" you collapse on the bed, letting him use your body even if it's too much. "Daddyy, you're making my kitty achy."
A small puff of air comes from his chest, a smile on his face. "Sorry. You know how much daddy loves your little kitty."
Rather than pulling out, Chan opts to let himself soften in your walls as he lays on your chest. Your legs wrap around his torso and you wrap your arms around his neck. Being this close to Chan has never felt more personal. It feels as though you need him. To feel his skin on yours reminded you that you're here, you're safe, and you're most importantly his.
Chan picks his head up, looking at you. "You okay? Does my baby need anything?" In response, you hug him tighter and gently rest his head back onto you.
"I just need my daddy."
~AFTERMATH (optional read)~
It took you much longer than you would've liked to float out of that headspace. Chan never left your side in the process. He has you facing him, tucked comfortably into his body as his hand trail up and down your back.
The cum has long dried between your legs, but your body is too tired to move and you don't want Chan away from you for more than a second.
"Oh my god," your voice is hoarse. "That was...something." Chan's chest jumps as he laughs, the sound vibrating onto your face. "That's one way to put it." His hand entangles in your hair to tilt your head to look at him. "How are you feeling though? You were pretty deep into the scene."
You grimace, "Ugh, I know. I don't even know how I managed to get that into it." Your fingers trace the outline of his pecs. "Was I...bad?"
Chan's eyes widen, "Bad?! What?! No baby you were amazing. Like, you could be an actor. I thought you were just hyping it up for me, but saying you were gonna pee and calling it a kitty? I don't know how I didn't cum right then and there."
You groan, pulling yourself from his grip to hide in his chest. "Shut uuupp." He giggles, kissing the top of your head, "Okay okay...Daddy's sorry."
"Shut up!"
a/n: this was deffoooo self-indulgent I don't even know what came over me. so scared on how this will perform but fuck it, we ball. thank you for reading! 🏷: @bethanysnow, @raesfictionn, @xxstrayland
Short Story Review(no spoilers)
what the fuck
⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
you know girls can tell when you look at their boobs
i don’t care how quickly you glance, 1 second is like 5 seconds in boob time
so, for relativistic boobtime, where t is the observer, and t’ is the time measured at the boob. t=t’/sqrt(1-(v/c)^2) solving for t=1, and t’=5, we get that the boobspeed, v, is represented by v=+/- (6*10^8)sqrt(6)i m/s
boobs travel at 1.5 gigametres per second in the complex direction.
everyone on r/aita is doing polyamory so wrong and i think they could learn something from tommyinnit. I'm not going to say hes doing it any better but he is being really funny about it
Arthur Bennett was an alpha male CEO buisness owner. Taylor Lautner's a retired actor needing a new job. Arthur Bennett spots him at a party and begins making moves! Trapped in between lust and love, Taylor accepts Arthur's proposition... what will happen between our Alpha and Omega?! Will love bloom??
… What ?
How is bnha anime of the decade...... they aren’t even anime of the hour of the minute of the second
Doctor: $140,000 a year
Furry artist on Patreon: $160,000 a year
Doctor: $140,000 a year
Furry artist on Patreon: $160,000 a year
when she says she doesn’t send nudes
i think that the "i do not control the ____" memes are generally tame and do not lend enough credence to the genuine absurdity of the original line that is
Story of Inanimate Insanity
Whoa-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh Story of Inanimate Insanity I fell off a cliff in episode 1 Object genocide This my
[Verse 1] I fell off a cliff in episode 1 I faced a talking phone in season 1 Explains the plot, wants us UFE, wants me gone Contestants saves me, takes me to immunity And hooks me up with viewers liking me Leaves me and says goodbye, but I escape and meet some allies [Pre-Chorus] Should I be a mean trope? Or should I use those nice tropes? I’m feeling evil, think I’ll kill them all [Chorus] I’m homicidal, and I’ve got a taste I want to wipe out the object race I’ve got no patience, got no resolve I will slaughter, screw the character development
[Bridge] I fell off the cliff In episode 1 Object genocide This my Inanimate Insanity [Verse 2] I’ll slaughter Marshmallow, I’ll waste who I choose With all this viewer voting there’s a chance that I’ll lose Now watch me move, I won’t stop, I’m feelin' rude Paper is shaking, he hears my approach I’ll slaughter Balloon and squash Trophy like a roach Nickel's my coach, all these contestants I will poach [Pre-Chorus] Screw those nice tropes I think I’ll crush their hopes I’m feeling evil, think I’ll kill them all [Chorus] I’m homicidal, and I’ve got a taste I want to wipe out the object race I’ve got no patience, got no resolve I will slaughter, screw the character development [Bridge] Burnt Marshmallow, Torn Paper, use some glass to take your life Rubber Balloons, Apple slices, hey Pickle, how's the wife? Mephone4 wants to collect resources Million dollars, is his ultimate prize Open the doors, to season 2's realm Start a new show, objects overwhelm
[Chorus] I’m homicidal, and I’ve got a taste I want to wipe out the contestant race I’ve got no patience, got no resolve I will slaughter, screw the character development
I felt my braincells die while reading, this is my kind of brain rot
OK I JS FOUND YOUR BLOG AND I NEED TO RAMBLE A LIL BIT ON SOME STARSTUDENT BS MY FRIEND STAR AND I WERE TALKIGN ABOUT
bubba grabbing kickin by the back of his shirt js like. YYYYYAANKK (now kickin and catnap have something in common </3 they both get grabbed by the fuckgn scruff by their boyfriends)
adding onto that bubba would just. HOLD someone. like js GRAB THEM "how to talk to short people" and hten he uses his big ass hand n js GETS them
also this ones kinda a joke but bubba used to be bullied by girls and now hes scared of women (especially picky bc who wouldnt be?? hot lesbian farmer gril) and has to go to bobbys therapy every week like "its why im gay :(((("
"bubs baby am i ur skibidi rizz ohio sigma grimace shake fanum tax pogchamp??????" "kickin what the FUCK" "answer the question bubba" "i. yes??" "omg ty my pookie coochie period slay babygirl smoochums princess pookie wookie dookie <3333"
there is something wrong with me.
This ass was a fucking roller coaster ride to read