The First Time I Ever Heard The N Word Used In Person, It Was At His Familys Dinner Table.

The first time I ever heard the n word used in person, it was at his family’s dinner table.

I was dumbfounded.

It can difficult at times for me to regulate my emotions. They often come in these rushing, overwhelming surges that are impossible to guage.

So I have been in situations like today, where I'm waiting to see the dentist, and I am struggling to hold back tears because I'm feeling unworthy, incapable and unloved. There have been plenty of times where I have lost the battle and full out sobbed in public.

This is embarrassing, but it's not the worst thing that has ever happened. Occasionally my stress-and-agony-exhausted body decides to release tension in other ways.

Have you ever sort of lost it and had a full out uncontrollable evil-scientist laugh attack in public?

I just woke up in my bed. In our bed. The paint,the furniture, the sounds. All our home. i could feel his leg against mine.

I wish i could say repulsion is what I feel. It's longing.

Should have said:

Listen pal, there's only enough room on this block for one Fuck Up (tm) and the position has been filled. GTFO!

That did not take long. He just stopped me in the street as I was walking to my car.

I ducked out by saying I didn’t have time to talk. I would have humoured him before. Maybe flirted. The thought makes me sick now.

Woo! Progress!

Just to crush my hopes and dreams, he told me that if I got a dog, it wouldn't snuggle with me.

Mother of the Year

His sister really struggled with depression and suicidal ideation in her early teens.  It was very inconvenient for his parents.

His mother made him check on his sister sometimes “to make sure she hadn’t killed herself” because she just “couldn’t stomach it” anymore.

I .. just... what?