Sausage: Sometimes I Talk To Myself For No Reason.

Sausage: Sometimes I talk to myself for no reason.

Sausage: Me too!

Pearl, hungover: Please tell me I'm imagining that I claimed I was king of the ducks.

Sausage: I would, but then I would be lying to the King of All Ducks.

Joey: If it pleases the court I would like to say that my opponent is TALKING SHIT!

Shelby: …

Oli: And what do I get out of this?

Gem: I'll give you a dollar.

Oli: What do you think I am? A chump? I would never do it for a dollar!

Gem: How about two dollars?

Oli: You got yourself a deal.

Shelby, after the fifth jumpscare: Why are you like this??

Xornoth: I used too much "No More Tears" shampoo as a kid and I haven't felt a single emotion since.

Xornoth: I feel like doing something stupid.

Joey: I’m stupid, do me.

Scar: You know, studies show that keeping a ladder in the house is more dangerous than a loaded gun. Scar: That's why I own TEN guns. Scar: Just in case some maniac tries to sneak in with a ladder.

Okay but it would be so funny if Gem won from a lore perspective.

The Watchers invite ginger haired bi lady no.2 in limited life as a joke, then she destroys Etho. So they think, hm, lets invite her again. And she destroys everyone and their mother and laughs.

Lizzie: I am an expert at identifying birds.

Martyn: Okay, what about those ones flying over there?

Lizzie: Yep. They're all birds.

Life Series Incorrect Quotes

Bdubs: I wasn’t that drunk.

Impulse: You colored my face with a highlighter because you said I was important.

Bdubs: BECAUSE YOU ARE!

Scar: All in all, a 100% successful trip.

Bdubs: But we lost Etho.

Scar: All in all, a 100% successful trip!

Scar: BigB, I screwed up, big time.

BigB: Scar, given your daily life experiences, you’re gonna have to be more specific.

Martyn: If bees can be fish and boys can be girls, then why can't my soulmate love me?

Grian: I thought I was going to have to yell at you, but now I think I should hug you.

Tango: So according to the cease and desist order I got, apparently you can’t ‘legally’ be a lawyer if your license is ‘cut out of a cereal box’.

BigB: Hi, who's this? Grian changed all of my contacts to mythical creatures.

Bdubs: What's mine?

BigB: Gnome.

Bdubs: THEY'RE SO MEAN, I'M NOT THAT SHORT!

BigB: Oh, hey Bdubs.

Bdubs: FUCK!

*Cleo is crying after Last Life betrayal*

Etho: There there, Cleo.

Cleo, still crying: Thanks, but how did you get into my base?

Etho: Great question—

Scar: What do we think of Martyn?

*pause*

Ren: *sighs* Nice pal.

Etho: I think they're gay.

A lot of tissue paper.

More elaboration:

Etho is handed a poor quality kakashi costume.

Joel gets a scratchy wizard beard and shrek ears.

Pearl walks in with a hoodie, everyone is perfectly fine with this. When she goes red, she drenches herself in fake blood.

I also raise you: Mumbo has a poorly cut out paper handlebar moustache taped to his face. Halfway through the performance, it gets ripped off and he screams really loudly.

Scar's wizard robe has the texture of and sounds like a purple chip wrapper.

Autumnwhistles idea for a last life musical made me think about the costumes and the funniest ways to make the costumes as crappy as possible.

ex: Scott's halo is a bunch of glow sticks tapes to his head that he has to hide between scenes so they can't see him entering/exiting.

or: Cleo gets the absolute worst makeup job.

or: The Watchers are just the tech crew who put a mask on before being onstage.

All the budget goes to giving Ren the most elaborate outfit.