My Wife And I Are Similar To The Perciver Ship In HP And Somehow I Only Just Now Realized That.

My wife and I are similar to the Perciver ship in HP and somehow I only just now realized that.

First off, I am not married. I just refer to them as my wife because we have decided that if we are unmarried by 30 we will marry each other, and we are not going to be married by 30.

They're Oliver. Driven and, while outwardly a bit hyper and maybe somewhat messy, quite driven. Low self esteem which I don't understand because how can someone so pretty not know that they have fantastic hair and a brilliant personality and great bone structure and I need to shut up about how hot my wife is or my family will find out I'm gay, and they're Christian, so that won't go well.

I'm Percy, a burned out gifted kid with a probably autistic father and a nice mom. I burned out early but, as I was already severely psychologically damaged, I wasn't able to show that without triggering my fight or flight response because the idea of any visible imperfection causes panic.

Anyways, my wife is hot, I need therapy, good night.

I suddenly made a lot of connections in a very short amount of time so I'm here to tell you about it.

In Harry Potter, lycanthropy is a kind of metaphor for HIV/AIDS.

Fenrir Greyback gave it to Remus Lupin when Rem was FIVE.

We just completely overlook that Lupin wasn’t a ‘Casanova’, he was a CSA victim coping badly

Why can't I be happy? And why have all of my comfort characters been hurt so badly? Like, without fail. All of them.

Are they not the same person? I think they're the same person.

Nearly Anyone in the SCP universe named Adam has f-ed up something important

Please reblog this with your Alexstrasza slander! I want to know if I'm missing any of her major sins.

So far, I knw she has:

Killed a bunch of innocent blue whelps who had nothing to do with the Nexus war

Waved Malygos' mate's corpse in front of him as a taunt

Condoned, or at least covered up, the forced breeding of Nyxondra

So much child abuse

Literally gave no fucks about Malygos going insane. Like, he was there for 10,000 years and she didn't even think 'We should check on him' until, first, she needed him to do something to benefit her, and second TO MURDER HIM. Like, maybe if you actually bothered to care, the entire Nexus war could have been prevented.

Continued to destroy Black Dragon eggs despite finding out how to purify them. She doesn't even make an effort to regain the technology to purify them. 'Life' my ass.

Add your own Alexstrasza slander in comments and reblogs, please!

I KNOW it isn't canon but Remus 'Casanova of Gryffindor Tower' Lupin was not ONLY the Casanova of Gryffindor Tower, he was THE ENTIRE SCHOOL'S CASANOVA. The man wasn't just a slut for his own house. He'd make everyone swoon, and he'd get on his knees for 99.9% of the men and with a bit of convincing he might even be willing for the 0.1%. Ya man's a hoe.

Like-

Arthur Weasley: Apperantly muggles have this thing called a 'body count' where they count all the people they've had intercourse with!

James, now interested in the conversation: Does everyone know their body count? Can you name every person on it?

Marlene, with a dead straight face: Don't ask Remus that, we'll be here for days.

Also bc fkin trans Remus is my new favorite thing, this was the time in which trans people were most accepted at Hogwarts, because everyone wanted Remus and if you were transphobic, you didn't have a chance.

I like the idea that Remus and Regulus had always gotten along. They just understood each other. They vibed. They were chill, and Remus was the only Marauder who was normal about Jegulus.

Then the Prank rolls around and suddenly there are no 'Marauders' anymore. James pulls a dumb bitch move and, in the most out of character thing he's ever done, chooses Sirius. Oh sure, he's LIVID with Sirius, but he chooses Padfoot anyways.

Peter, despite being a simp for James, sides with Remus, because he sides with the person who can protect him, and he was introduced to the Marauders by Remus beating the everloving shit out of a bully who was picking on Peter and he is now slightly scared of the werewolf.

So Remus and Peter are alone, and even the TEACHERS are beginning to feud over the whole situation. Minnie and Pomfrey love Remus like their own child, and Sprout is 110% willing to join that group, even though she has no idea what's going on, and don't even get me started on Newt Scamander (CoMC Teacher at the time)

Around this time, the Slytherin group was starting to get tired of Snape being an asshole and an idiot, so he kinda got booted, because god knows Reggie knows Remus is a werewolf and he does NOT tolerate people trying out out his friends, be that saying that Lucius is gay as the sky is blue (It's pretty obvious but still) or saying that Barty is intersex, he won't put up with it.

Keep in mind, at this time, Remus is absolutely DROWNING in guilt and self loathing. Like, for Peter, every day is a 24 hour attempt to talk him down from the roof.

So instead of siding with Snape, Regulus replaces him with Remus. At first, everyone is kinda iffy on this, the Marauders don't exactly get along with them, but they kinda grow to 'tolerate' it. (Read: They like it and they love him)

Like, all these pureblooded reluctant Death Eaters, and a gay werewolf. It makes no sense, but it happened. Flash forwards to the beginning of year seven, Euphemia Potter takes James and Sirius to Platform 9 3/4. Remus hasn't spoken to either of them for months, to the point where they were slightly concerned.

Sirius feels bad, James feels bad, Remus wants to not exist anymore in a violent way, and Peter just wants everyone to get along. Euphemia is confused as to why Remus is just towering over against a wall instead of coming to say hi to the other Marauders, weren't they super close? Of course, she has no idea what happened, because James won't tell her The Secret.

Effie: Why is Remus standing alone?

James: It's a long story.

Effie: You and Sirius should go say hello, at least!

James: I don't wish to die today, mum.

Effie: He's your friend, and he clearly needs to talk to someone. Go check on him.

James: Mum, I promise, he does not want us to talk to him.

Effie: Then I will. *Walks away*

So Effie talks to Remus and gets more of the story. Not all, but more. She now understands the basic plot. Sirius fucked up bad, Snape also fucked up bad, James made a bad choice but it isn't his fault, Snape and Remus got hurt. Badly.

And it is at this point, when Sirius and James (Who now is targeting Lucius because Snape has blackmail) are both looking at Remus, that Regulus appears. He arrives alone, as per usual, and the first thing he does is rush over to Remus. Sirius goes completely slackjawed and has the goddamn audacity to be offended that Remus moved on so fast, despite the fact that he did not and is actually barely coping enough to talk or even just eat on a semi-regular basis.

Quickly, Remus and Regulus are joined by Barty Crouch Jr., Evan Rosier and Lucius.

And the only thing Sirius and James hear over the chaos of the station as the group passes them is "So Lucy..." Trailing off as they walk away. And Remus said it. Remus is close enough to these people to call Lucius 'I hate everyone and everything other than my hair' Malfoy by Lucy.

I don't know, I just like the idea of the Slytherins adopting Remus after The Prank.