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Police: Sirius Black?

Regulus: No and if I ever start acting like him KILL ME

Marlene: THE FLOOR IS LAVA

Sirius: *grabs James’ hand and pulls him on to the table*

Also Sirius: *pushes Reg off of where he was trying to get on to the table*

Mary: Hey Remus can I have your opinion on something?

Remus: Of course

Mary: But I haven’t told you what it is yet?

Mary: You may not even have an opinion on this

Remus: Oh I always have an opinion

Regulus: What happens if I hit the brake and gas at the same time?

Sirius: The car takes a screenshot

Remus: Get out

Remus: Wow I can’t believe you’re Sirius’s brother

Regulus: Neither can I it’s an ongoing investigation

Lily: Are you a cat or dog person?

Remus: Definitely a cat person

Sirius: *snaps head around*

Lily: I’ve never seen the look of utter betrayal before yet here we are

Peter: Hey do you have the weird urge to lecture yourself?

Peter: Like, “Sirius, Peter, what are you doing?”

James: Sirius, Peter, what are you doing?

Sirius: *screams*

Peter: I conjured him

the fact that sirius black died during pride month idk but seems kinda homophobic to me

Remus: I’m in love with Sirius

Lily: I’m sorry

Remus: I said-

Lily: No I heard you i’m just sorry

*In the Common Room*

Remus: James! Sirius and Peter are missing!

James: Why are you coming to me? You think i have them microchipped or something?

Remus:

Lily:

Marlene: …do you?

James: Yeah hold on…

covid sucks i feel like i’m dying at my funeral someone better throw a bouquet into the crowd so we can find out who’s next

*Dinner at Hogwarts*

Remus: You know James you’re turning into your mother

Peter: He’s right

James: What no i’m not- Sirius eat your veggies then you can have dessert

Remus:

Peter:

Sirius:

James: Oh Good Godric I AM MY MOTHER

happy birthday to my favorite golden era wizard who was sorted into gryffindor and proved that was where he belonged time and time again. happy birthday to the boy who deserves so much better than he got yet he still made it through. happy birthday to the boy he survived against all odds (and looked good doing it). happy birthday to harry james potter<3

happy birthday to my fucking scarheaded nerd boy who endured a childhood of abuse, parental death, and the weight of the wizarding world and still turned out to be a kind, noble, humble, and loving kid. i love you dearly and you deserve the world.

*In The Common Room*

James: Hey Marls want to play a game?

Marlene: Yes what is it

James: I’m going to tell you something Sirius has said and you have to tell me if he said it to Remus or my Mom

Marlene: I’m gonna be great at this let’s do it

James: “I want to live with you forever”

Marlene:

Marlene: …I don’t like this game anymore

*At a black family dinner*

Orion: I need you all to be straight with me

Everyone:

Sirius: Well shit then bye guys

Bellatrix:

Regulus: Yeah…Uh i’m out too

Andromeda:

Narcissa: Merlin’s beard people One dinner one normal dinner please

One of the most common reasons I hear for people being against abortion is because “life is sacred.”

Really? Since when? When has life ever been sacred in this country?

If life is sacred, how come we don’t have universal healthcare?

If life is sacred, how come we don’t pass comprehensive gun laws so first graders don’t get gunned down in their classrooms?

If life is sacred, why don’t we offer paid maternal leave so mothers can actually take care of the babies that you are now forcing them to have?

If life is sacred, how come we don’t bat an eye when the police murder black kids?

If life is sacred, why do we have the highest maternal death rate in the developed world, which is only going to increase now that women are being forced to give birth?

If life is sacred, why is the death penalty even still a thing?

If life is sacred, why are we still encouraging violence against the LGBTQ+ community?

Life has literally never been sacred in this country. Maybe anti-choicers like to pretend that it is because it makes them feel righteous when in reality, they’re just misogynistic pieces of shit, but it’s not. And as long as psychotic, reactionary morons continue to steal power undemocratically and make decisions that the majority of us do not want, it never will be.

Abortion is healthcare.

Abortion. Saves. Lives.

this is definitely a regular occurrence i don’t care it happened

Dumbledore: I need your help

Harry: Hang on I have to ask my parents

Dumbledore: wha-

Harry: *pulls out a Ouija board* Hey mom and dad, can I go with Dumbledore in a mission?

Lily and James from the afterline: A-B-S-O-L-Y-T-E-L-Y N-O-T

Harry: They said no :/

Dumbledore:

Andromeda, to Sirius: So, this is my boyfriend, Ted.

Ted: ...Why is he looking at me like I'm a zoo animal?

Sirius: Well, Andromeda acts as sort of like my mom, since my actual one sucks, so emotionally, this is kind of like being told that you're my new dad.

Ted: But, you know it's nothing like that, right?

Sirius: Absolutely. Do you cook macaroni?

JKR: *Mentions Marlene, Dorcas & Mary once*

JKR: *Explains 3% of Remus, Sirius, James, Lily and Regulus*

JKR: *Makes Peter a traitor*

JKR: *Makes The Marauders bullies*

JKR: *Kills them all*

The fandom: *Comes up with Headcanons for these characters' sexualities, childhood, parents, favorite beverage, favorite food, the way they act when they are drunk, who they date, identities, the way they dress, favorite songs, how they act when they are sad, how they act when they are happy, how they act when they are angry, how they sleep, how they take they coffee or tea, mental illnesses, mental conditions, them as songs, Halloween costumes, Christmas Presents, sweets they like, jewelry they wear, friendships between each other, relationships between each other, when they lost their virginity, how they like sex, NSFW Headcanons, blood type, zodiac sign, religion, how they dance, what shows they watch, favorite movies, favorite superhero, favorite villain, them as dishes, them as drinks, what they wear for a club, what they wear for the beach, what they wear for the mountain, how they manage their social media, what kind of smartphones they have, if they are dog or cat people, if they are vegan or not, ideal jobs, jobs they actually have, future plans, if they want kids or not, dreams and hopes, worst fears, nightmares they have, them as colors, them as partners, them as our partners, how they decorate their rooms, how they act on the dentist's appointment, how they act on a doctor's appointment, childhood traumas, them as Greek Gods, them as celebrities, them as books, books they read, favorite author, favorite singer, music abilities, sport abilities, weird abilities...etc(insert more)*

Literally everyone else: You need help...

The fandom: *sighing* We know

i’ve never been so relieved other people do the same thing