Astyanax - Tumblr Posts
This is so adorable (and heartbreaking at the same time :,)
Fic idea - Astyanax in Ithaca
for times when my English will become acceptable because writing this in Polish feels not right sample of the story under the summary c:
Of course, I was thinking about Penelope's reaction to Odysseus showing up with a new kid (10/11 years old, give or take, Astyanax) at their doors.
I imagined it as the Game of Thrones scene when Ned Stark comes home and shows Catelyn a baby who, he claims, is his bastard. If I were her, I would lose my mind.
But I think that Odysseus explained himself chaotically, yet truly and Penelope didn't fight with the idea of raising the little prince as their own.
But Telemachus? Well, that's a hell of a different story.
He spent his childhood without his father, missing his presence and hoping to meet him one day. He lived in his shadow, as the problematic son of the absent king that everyone wanted to kill, or as a painful reminder to his mother that Odysseus wasn't around anymore and that she needed to be there for the two of them.
Now his dad is back but with a new child.
A new child who knows his father so well. Odysseus was his only parent for ten years (if we forget about 600 uncles, but they died after like 3 years? if I get it right?) and they just get themselves on an impossible level.
Odysseus knows Astyanax's nightmares (they share them).
Astyanax knows his father's past and doesn't need to ask many questions, and Telemachus does. He hates to do it because he sees Odysseus's pain, he sees Astyanax's reproachful look, like he is going to fight Telemachus if he doesn't leave their father, and-
and he sees the sad, concerned eyes of his mom.
So he doesn't ask much about those 20 years. And somehow it's even worse.
Because Telemachus doesn't know Odysseus. Because it feels weird and not home, like they are forced to be close, but they are not. Because he knew his father from songs, stories and legends, and this man is not who he heard of and he doesn't know how can he fix it.
Telemachus doesn't like to think about it but feels like he gives up on Odysseus. He spent the last 20 years of his life trying to reach that man and- Telemachus is tired.
Besides, Odysseus has another son anyway, right?
The prince of Troy, cursed boy, son of Hector, Astyanax, who also turned out to be a pain in the ass.
He knows that he can't blame the kid for his existence or even for the fact that Odysseus took him to their home.
For that Odysseus often takes Astyanax for horse rides to show him the island. The thing that Telemachus did alone.
For that, Odysseus teaches the boy how to use a sword and they laugh a lot during that. The thing that Telemachus did with strangers, got dozens of bruises, always trying to do everything he could to impress the person that wasn't there.
He doesn't blame Astyanax.
He just can't stand him.
But the boy seems to love the idea of going after him whenever Odysseus manages to pull him off for a moment. It's okay when Astyanax watches him during the trainings with eyes shining with excitement. However, it's bad when Astyanax starts to talk.
Father said I'm getting better at parrying-
When I was with father on Calypso's island-
Father does this completely differently-
Telemachus is a patient man. He waited for his father for 20 years. But sometimes he asks himself if Astyanax knows that all this talking about Odysseus, the man he missed but can't actually get to know, is such a trigger for him.
Maybe Astyanax teases him to show how much more of a son Odysseus is?
With every day Telemachus is more and more irritated. He does his best to hide it, but he can't ignore this fire burning him from the inside.
The reason for this fragile peace collapse is, relatively, very stupid.
Telemachus was tired after all day when he met Odysseus.
"The situation in the city is now calmed down,’ he informed his father, combing through his wind-tangled hair."
Odysseus nodded and put a hand on his shoulder.
"Thank you, Telemachus. Well done."
Telemachus froze, not knowing what to say. He couldn't even move. Finally, he nodded, wincing slightly at the awkwardness of his every interaction with his father.
"Of course, father."
Odysseus seemed equally perplexed. However, the whole situation changed when Astyanax appeared in the courtyard where they stood.
Or, he ran into it, almost toppling over, just to get to Odysseus faster and embrace him around the waist.
"Dad, you will never believe what I found with mother in the garden!"
Telemachus watched with unhealthy interest as his father's face lit up with a smile as he listened to Astyanax's excited chatter.
A sudden anger, though senseless and petty, flared his veins. He had to avert his gaze and drive it into the ground so that no one could see his anger. His jaw was clenched tightly.
Twenty years of life based on a vague memory. An entire journey to find his father. His faith, his efforts and his devotion. All this to not be able to have one real conversation with his father. All this to watch both his parents melt down over his new, little brother. All this to stand by and watch his dreams fade away.
He no longer watched.
He walked away before he could do something stupid. Something that would distance him even further from his father.
He holed up in one of the cool and dark corridors of their palace. He concentrated on his breathing and massaged his temples.
He was an adult and knew how to deal with his feelings. Not that anyone had ever taught him that.
"Telemachus, what's wrong? You don't even know what we found in the garden, you went too fast!"
He didn't know shit about how to deal with his feelings.
"Could you, for five minutes, let me live as I lived before you came along? Five minutes without your constant footsteps and shouting behind my back. Five minutes of peace and quiet! That's all I'm asking for!"
But Astyanax took a few steps back as if frightened by Telemachus' sudden outburst. A grimace twisted his face and he squinted as if Telemachus was an extremely difficult puzzle for his quick mind.
"Why are you so angry? I don't understand."
"At this point? I'm not sure anymore. All I know is that I wasn't this angry even once before you dragged yourself home with father and decided to act as if it had all been yours forever."
Telemachus had to calm down. For bloody hell, he had just shouted at the eleven-year-old as if he was guilty of anything.
‘Are you angry about your father bringing me with him?’
Damn it.
It wasn't true. To be fair, he did not want Astyanax to die that night in Troy or be lost in the depths of the burning city.
Still, did he want him here? He let his thoughts wander before he could finally admit it to himself.
Astyanax, essentially, was not the problem. Everything else was. Telemachus was as well.
"No. There are many other things I'm angry about, but not this."
He sat down on the floor and leaned against the cool wall. He hid his face in his hands and let the anger leave him with his next breaths.
"Forgive my shouting. You got me at the wrong time, brother."
And he heard the boy slowly slide down the wall and sit down a few steps away from him.
"You should be grateful, you know?" suddenly said Astyanax. "He travelled all the world to see you and Mom."
You won't scream, Telemachus said to himself. He took a breath.
"Yeah, he didn't really know me, so. I don't know if that counts."
"That's even better. I mean, he loved you anyway. All this time, he was thinking about you"
This logic was wrong, but Telemachus doesn't find enough strength to fight over it.
They stayed silent for a few minutes.
"He didn't want me, you know? He just didn't want me dead and I reminded him of you. He was also scared of what I would become if he just left me alone. And you are so awful but he wanted you from the beginning and he loves you and he was so proud and-" Astyanax put his arms around his knees, his voice breaking as he spoke his next words: "You're a terrible idiot, you know. But he still wants you."
Telemachus needed a few seconds to see that every now and then, Astyanax would rub his wet eyes with his little fists.
He wasn't ready for this, even after months of training he wouldn't be ready. He stays silent for a moment. Slowly, he puts his arms over the crying mess and draws him to his side.
"And you think that father carried you all over the world because he doesn't like you?"
"Because he's kind and he would be ashamed to tell uncle Polites what he did."
"As far I know he wasn't so nice all this time, right? But he never turned his back on you. If you don't trust me, trust that. Odysseus came with you to Ithaca, because he wants you."
Astyanax did not reply but rested his head on his side. Telemachus let him.
Later that night, Telemachus carried a tired Astyanax straight to his parents' bedroom and knocked. When confused Odysseus finally opened it, Telemachus threw the sleepy child at him without hesitation.
"Hug your bloody kid."
And he walked away. This was his moment to avoid uncomfortable questions.
Let me know what do you think. And yes, Telemachus and Odysseus have a proper conversation about being father and son, but later.
BTW sorry for all the errors, I'm so sleepy right now I barely see my screen
"Odysseus could have raised Astyanax as his own son! He shouldn't have killed him! Zeus is just an idiot who doesn't understand anything about children!"
Imagine you are Astyanx. Imagine that one day, you discover that your father, the man you thought was your father, is actually the murderer of your real father, who stole you from your cradle. Imagine that for years, you see your father lying to everyone, but the thought never crossed your mind that he might be lying to you. How do you know he didn't take you to ensure Troy would have no heir to the crown? That he took you to one day make you a puppet king in Troy for him? He's such a good liar, how do you know he wasn't lying when he looked you in the eye and said, "I love you, my son."
You know that your father—no, he's not your father, never was—did terrible things, but it never crossed your mind that you were one of the terrible things he did. You are a Trojan prince. You are Hector's son. You are not a little orphan from the battlefield that Odysseus took pity on. Odysseus destroyed your city. Odysseus lied to you. Odysseus has manipulated you. And Odysseus will PAY.
So many Greek tragedies tell about exactly this - about the attempt to prevent a tragedy, and about how the attempt failed, just as the gods and prophets had warned. If Astyanax had stayed alive, he would have murdered Odysseus' family no matter what Odysseus did, because that's how Greek tragedies work.
and yes, zeus suck.
#I'm back on my bullshit :3
My villain origin story (...# whatever) will be people thinking there is some sort of prophecy about Astyanax killing Odysseus/Achaeans if he's left alive.
There is not any such thing in any actual source about Greek myth and the Trojan war.
The Horse and the Infant having Zeus use that to convince Odysseus is an Epic thing only.
(So please for the love of everything do not talk about some ~prophecy~ and then tag regular greek myth related tags because it doesn't apply to the actual Trojan war!)
I want I want to die
OH MY GOD WHAT AAAAH
Hektor is forced to linger without being able to go into the Underworld for twelve days.
Is haunting (like Patroklos did to Achilles in coming to him in his dream) always voluntary? And even so, would not Hektor maybe want to reach out, the longer he's stuck lingering, watching the grief around him?
And what if some of the haunting isn't even voluntary?
What if Hektor unintentionally haunted a couple of his family during those twelve days... did people see his spirit in the corridors and rooms? in the stables? Standing by Astyanax's bed?
And then the possible intentional hauntings, born from love and grief and wanting to assure even when there's nothing that can be done;
Does Andromache wake from dreams with her husband's ghostly touch on her cheek, but not having been able to embrace him? How many times? Both Andromache and Hektor yearning, and Hektor keeps reaching out, but they still can't touch.
Grieving parents waking up from dreams where Hektor assures them it doesn't matter if they will be able to bury him or not.
Paris waking up from a dream where Hektor assures him they'll have their talk, but it better not be any time soon (even a ghost can have foolish, useless hopes).
“What if Odysseus adopts Astyanax 🥰” tf happens to Andromache in that timeline then?
IF I SEE ONE MORE POST WANTING ODYSSEUS TO ADOPT ASTYANAX I WILL KILL SOMEONE
If we think like people, what would happen 🤔 Not really what would happen
1. THIS CHILD WILL DIE IN THE STORM ON THE WAY TO GREECE
2.IF NOT he will kill them all like dogs and you know what HE HAS EVERY RIGHT TO DO SO
No it’s kinda crazy that Hector and Andromache had Astyanax/Scamandrios during the war.
Was he a happy accident? Did Hector weep in fear mixed with the joy, that his son will be born in a world where the victor is not decided- that any moment he can be harmed by his enemies? Or did they plan him, was Hector so confident he’d win the war, seeing it as a glorious story he’d tell his one day when he is older and Hector king?
High King,
Astyanax
Forever
Left in the underworld
hdhahdhajfbajdnaudb Okay having Thoughts™️ about some of these ‘Odysseus raises Astyanax’ fics. Because. Because if we’re talking about the full odyssey experience. If Astyanax were to survive. He would have spent 11 years of his life growing up with Odysseus as his father. Now, to the main area of thought - Telemachus. Imagine. Imagine being a child, hearing of your father only in stories. From your mother, the servants, your grandparents. Seeing your grandmother succumb to her grief, seeing your mother grow sadder by the day, more sullen, seeing your grandfather withdraw into himself, all because of your father.
The man you are told you look like, the man who left for war, six, eight, eleven, fifteen, TWENTY years ago, left your home in disrepair, left your mother and you to deal with suitors disrespecting your house and name, the man who you are so angry at, yet Also worship as a god, because you don’t have a CHOICE. You can’t love him, you don’t KNOW him, but you love him in the way you love your gods - distant, unknowable, unreachable, and yet you have his face, your mother sometimes gates at you with these sad, sad eyes and you know she’s not really seeing you when she tells you she loves you.
You know he is a man, logically, how could he not be when your mother still remembers every calous on his hands and your grandfather tells you of how he almost set his room on fire one day, but he is only a legend to you. You hear other Kings, Kings from the same war your father left for (they came back, they are already back and he is still gone) discussing him, you hear how he helped end the war with your and your mother’s name on his lips and YET! He’s not here, he’s not here but he can’t be dead, because everyone agrees that he is too stubborn to die.
And then. He is back. And he has a boy with him. A boy who is younger than you, still just a child. And he regards the boy as his own, introduces him to you as ‘your brother’. He hasn’t dishonoured your mother, he took the child from the burning city of Troy because he is merciful and kind and you see it in the way the boy hugs him and calls him papa. And you should be happy, your father is back, you have a sibling now, your mother finally smiles properly again, your grandfather no longer cries when he sees you.
But. This boy. The boy your father brought from Troy. He got all that you have ever wanted: he got your father, from the moment he was Born he got your father, he was there for his first steps, his first words, he taught him how to sail, fight, read, count, he has been there with him through it all and you have never wanted anything more. ‘This child is not his son’ says that hateful, angry voice in your head.
You spend time with your father. He weeps, hugs you. Tells you he’s proud of the man you are now. Teaches you how to rule, it is your birthright, he says. He goes hunting with you and tells you he loves you and that the thought of you and your mother got him through many a peril. You spend time with your brother, you make him laugh, he loves you, clings to you just as much as he clings to your father, you teach him more about Ithaca, the way it is now, because he’s only heard stories. And still, in the back of your mind, you know you hate the child. You despise him with every fiber of your heart even if your mind knows he is not to blame - and that he has dealt with the same thing, just opposite to you.
Whereas you had a home, your mother and the rest of your family, but yearned for more than just the memory of your father, wanted for freedom, the boy had him, in the flesh, soothing his nightmares and teaching him to live, had the open sea and the deck of a ship, the capability to go anywhere, he lacked the stability that you had and despised. He didn’t know his grandfathers, would never get to know his grandmother, only had a memory of a mother and a brother, saw them as saints, as a reason to keep pushing forth.
You are opossites. You don’t know how it happened, as the child is not hers, but your brother looks like your mother where you are clearly your father’s son, yet your personalities seem to have been switched. You’re calmer, much more subdued, you don’t smile easily and are weaker of will. Your brother is loud and boisterous, quick to crack a grin and so, so Brave.
You still get the compulsion to bow to your father whenever he enters a room, to touch him to make sure he is real, at times. He sometimes wakes screaming, seeing horrors that you could not imagine in his sleep and doesn’t feel comfortable in a proper bed for years. He sets the curtains on fire and your father laughs in relief and he holds him to his chest. Your own chest cleaves in two.
Just. Is this anything?
"Quit the singing and get on with it" -Neoptolemus
okay, so let's take Zeus' prophecy a little too directly and imagine that Odysseus actually adopted little Astyanax
_
5-years-old Astyanax *crying*: DAD, I'M SORRY! I DROPPED THE CANDLE AND NOW YOUR CHAIR IS ON FIRE!
Odysseus:
Odyseus, mid-heart attack: Is- Is that it???
*looks on the sky and pointing at Astyanax*: HE DID IT, ALRIGHT? EVERYONE SAW IT? HE. DID IT. Throne and house are burning. We're done here.
*thunder*
Odysseus:
Odysseus: I take it as yes.
_
woaah Odysseus
sketch under the cut (which is better]
As an Odyssey fan, and Odysseus fan, I'm dead, anhilated to know that one of etymologies of my hometown (Eliocroca) is because of a TROYAN PRINCE! (Elio)
Astyanax, that you?
Not really the other is under the goverment of the sun but gods I'm baffled.
I don't know the accuaracy of this toponym but if it's a possiblity I'm out.
All of my mutuals!!! Behold the polarity of Héctor of Troy: the Horse girlie, Faithfull husband of Amdromache and father of Astanyax, Loved son lf Priam and prince of Troy,
Hector, the breaker of horses, whose helmet flashed.
（a GIF）
ok posted on twt and tt now for my tumblings eat up
@katerinaaqu I love how you portrayed his anguish and sorrow, he thought it would be quick, non painful, only the cutting of a few branches, but he didn´t remembered the hatred in the hearts of the Achaeans, their longing for victory, BLOOD, for those who had fallen in the siege, it was a genocide, taking the tree down from the roots. How in war nothing is sacred, the rape of Cassandra, the death of Priam, these shows how, the Achaeans who feared the gods were having none of that, the bloodlust was so much than even Ares would be afraid, it was not hubris it was desire, desire to kill, desire of blood, desire of letting Tartarus lose, they didn´t give a damn care for the divine, the wanted REVENGE.
It really shows how war and it´s environment, change even the souls of people that didn´t wanted it, he is beyond repair, he´s internalizing everything, and Polites, as much of a joy is, is not understanding the scope of this as he hasn´t been there, HE doesn´t know what Odysseus has seen, the hell that was the sack....
I also like the juxtaposition of young Odysseus (cocky) with the man who has seen the horrors, he´s not him, he changed, he´s fearful of everything, he wanted to go home not stay there.
The horse His idea, was the catalyst for the genocide, he should have done it with a few soldiers, not with the whole troupe, Neoptolemus wanted blood, everyone wanted blood except Odysseus, Menelaus and Dio (he killed Hector) (to be honest the wanted blood, but not THAT level of blood, they weren´t saints after all, so many lifes had been taken by their swords too).
That´s something that Epic, fails to grasps, the sheer psychological tool that the Sack had in him, it was not pretty, it wasn´t heroic it was a blood bath, the killing of innocents, everything!!! (I don´t think Jay doesn´t know it, but because he wants to do a cool retelling, it doesn't align well with today´s audience, and I say it as a Winion myself, I really love so much the musical, but this part doesn´t sit well with me, for me Monster should have been after Just a man (hate that he´s the one killing Astyanax and is my favourite song of the Troy saga to be honest ).
Kinda a prequel to
Originally for @prompted-wordsmith so yeah something I have been working for ages. April 1st for our poor tormented little liar Odysseus 😆
~~~
Guilt (P1)
The noise was deafening. It was a sea of people cheering and whistling; a sea dressed in bronze, leather and blood. Odysseus was pacing among these people keeping his head low. He was trying very hard to avoid gazing someone in the eye. He could hear their praise and yelps of excitement. On occasion he could feel a pat on his back.
"Huzzah! Hooray for Odysseus!"
"Man of Many Ways!"
"The one Equal to Gods! Hooray!"
"Sacker of Cities!"
"Sacker of Cities!"
His ears were buzzing. All sounds around him were silenced or blended together in a mass of unknown origins. His head was throbbing painfully and the helmet adorned with boar tusks seemed to be weighting more than all metal in the world upon it. Just a little longer...just a bit further... Blood had become one with his skin and hair. He could feel it running down still even if it was long now clotted upon him. How weird! Normally every person would be delighted with this triumph. Why couldn't he?
"Sacker of Cities!"
Just a bit further...
"Sacker of Cities!"
His previous noble prancing became a half-run now. He was almost pushing his way through the mixed people of triumph and of woe. Eventually he reached his hut and felt like breathing in relief as he ran in with his close friend coming right behind him.
"Close the damn curtains, Polites!" Odysseus ordered
He half-collapsed over the bronze bowl containing fresh water they had picked up off the river. He remained there for a few seconds, supporting his body over the metallic water container. He looked down. What he saw scared him; it was a warrior staring back at him through the dark depths of the vessel. His head was adorned with a helmet of boar tusk, stained with blood and scratched by some sword. His expression was hard and had sunken eyes in their sockets. The beard was shaggy and splattered with blood. His onyx eyes had a worrying sheen of death, of triumph and of guilt...
"Gods help me...that's me!" He thought in terror
The ambitious, flamboyant and somehow a bit arrogant young man was long gone. He had given his place to this bloodthirsty killer, the face of that man was reeking of sweat, blood and tar from weapons and smoke; the Sacker of Cities. How had they come to this?!
*
A few days before...
The room was buzzing by the men talking almost at the same time. All the Greek kings were supposed to discuss their plan on their next move but it ended up being a buzzing hive of angry bees that fought for a better place in the sun. Neoptolemus was still thirsty for revenge for hi ls father, wearing his armor proudly. The kid seemed to be one with the damn thing! Odysseus was still cursing the moment he decided to bring him from Skyros. This boy seemed less and less like a good idea for his expedition. Agamemnon was there for the glory of his nation, Menelaus wanted his wife back, this time time from a new suitor that took her as a wife, after the murder of Paris. Nestor was trying to keep them all in check, Diomedes still held a grudge against Paris even long after the mutilation of his corpse. Odysseus thought his head would split by this cacophony of tired and frustrated kings that each one of them wanted something different!
"ENOUGH!" Odysseus bellowed
The silence that followed was deafening as the king of Ithaca practically pranced through the crowded hall and grabbed the bronze scepter, pushing it to the ground.
"EVERYONE KEEP QUIET AND LET ME SPEAK!"
His voice had echoed long enough for everyone to understand that there was no stopping this man now. Odysseus took some raspy breaths as if he tried to collect himself before speaking.
"How much longer must this go on? How much longer should we keep this siege? Can't you see it? It's been a decade already! Troy won't fall! Trojans get new allies and we grow weaker by the year. Year after year after year after year we held this city and for what? How much longer will we stay here? Another 10 years? 20? I do not know about you, my lords, but I refuse to stay here that long! My wife and child waited way too long!"
"Do not wish to be king among kings, son of Laërtes!" A voice was heard over others, "you are not the only one with home and family to return to!"
"My lords, I can speak of no one else but myself. However I believe you shall agree with me that this siege lasted way too long. I have no doubt that there are many people; younger people in this council that can withhold this for the decades to come, but I have long stopped being young, my lords, and I do not intend going back to my home when I reach the age of Nestor and pass the crown to my adult son to retire. There are other kingdoms that require our attention, my lords! Not just this one, but our own!"
A series of hums passed around but Odysseus could feel it already there were some objections or some hesitations. They obviously didn't know what he was talking about.
"The war won't last much longer, Odysseus" Agamemnon the son of Atreus spoke, "we have already cut the tree of succession to the Trojan throne. Both Paris and Hector are dead, you managed to capture Helenos. Troy is losing already. I highly doubt we will stay here much longer"
"With all due the respect" Odysseus interrupted, "as long as there is the line of Priam Troy is not finished. Helen has now joined in matrimony with a new husband. Undoubtedly the widow of Hector will do the same when her period of mourning is done. And line or no line, the walls are still there, my lord, they are mocking us. We cannot break them from the outside"
"Odysseus..." Menelaus now spoke, the man who still believed in him blindly, "What else is to be done? We are not gods to transform ourselves to birds and get in"
Odysseus's eyes sparkled in a determined way as if he managed to hypnotize everyone in the room with just his fiery gaze, his voice sounded clearer than ever.
"I could take Troy in one night if the plan works!"
The seer audacity of his words was greeted with a silent shock and then a wave of chuckle.
"I believe you lost your mind FOR REAL this time, Odysseus son of Laërtes!" Neoptolemus called out arrogantly
Odysseus shot him with a warning glare. He had no idea how that insolent boy had heard about his attempt to avoid that war in the first place pretending to be mad but that was not the time for quarrel.
"I am pretty sure that the black ships of the Acheans rest in this place over a decade for nothing! We could obviously have asked you! I am sure you can also guide us inside the city yourself!"
"I have already infiltrated Troy!" Odysseus claimed.
The wave of exclamations that passed among the kings of the Greeks was delightful as it was annoying to Odysseus!
"We were protected by the gods, Diomedes and I. We disguised ourselves as beggars and walked about the city, I found their secrets, I know the passages! I plundered their temple according to the prophecy!"
With a determined move he threw the palladium of Athena to their feet; proof to his words. The silence he earned was delightful.
"I have a plan...if you choose to accept it!"
"That is not fighting with HONOR!" Agamemnon pointed out, "We do not do that Odysseus!"
"We fought with honor, Agamemnon...10 years now! And where did it lead us? We are still here; debating whether we shall live and die to the foot of Troy when the price is right there before us! If you want results, hear me out!"
As his onyx eyes stared deeply into his audience, he knew he had them now.
"I shall uproot the line of Priam from the city! We can throw them all out of the castle walls of the holy city of Troy! So, my lords, long-haired Acheans, if you want results, hear me out!"
Their silence was his confirmation.
"Here's the plan, then..."
*
Odysseus growled and snapped out of his flashback. How easy had he made that sound at that time! Even in his own ears such a promise wouldn't appear nearly as horrendous as it was proven to be! He felt a drop of sweat rolling down his chin but it was thicker. He could still feel blood... He grunted in annoyance as he removed that helmet that was crushing his head and sank his hands in the water, brushing them intensely. The water took a reddish sheen almost immediately. Blood was sticking way too much... Odysseus splashed water all over his face maniacally, even passing water over his matted with blood head. It was still there...the memory was still there... he felt dizzy almost. He rushed to the wine jar resting at the side. He broke the wax seal and filled a cup for himself without watering it first. He downed it quickly before having the chance to feel the burning sensation down his throat.
"Odysseus..." Polites started, alarmed
Odysseus didn't hear him. He filled a second cup that was gone the same quickly. He was still shaking.
"Blood..." he whispered, "Blood and death everywhere... plunders and rapes...everywhere..."
He clenched the cup in his hand.
"What have we done, Polites! What have we done?"
"What have I done?!"
"Sire..." Polites began, "this is war..."
A dry laughter escaped Odysseus's lips.
"That was no war, my friend...that was a massacre...a slaughter..."
He drained yet another cup. He was feeling dizzy and he wasn't sure it was the red wine at fault.
"Priam is dead..." he whispered as if in delirium, "...killed upon the altar of Zeus where he sought sanctuary... Cassandra raped right outside the sanctuary at the xoano of Athena...and Astyanax...the child is..."
His voice broke. He covered his face with his free hand as if that could stop the sobbing that was coming out of his thick chest.
"We're cursed, Polites..." he whispered, "Cursed...doomed! The gods won't turn the blind eye in this hubris..." he finished the cup he was holding
"Odysseus...please!" Polites exclaimed concerned, "Even so...what you say is right but still...it was war..."
"I gave them the key to this, Polites..." Odysseus ignored him, "it was MY plan that put them in..."
"Please, Odysseus...you...you didn't know..."
Odysseus chuckled. It was a dry, humorless one...
"Yes I did, my friend...I did...I just chose to ignore it..."
He refilled his cup.
"Odysseus I beg of you at least...at least put some water to your wine...don't do this..."
He placed his hand upon Odysseus's large shoulder.
"And no, that was what you feared...not what you knew. There was no way you would know the magnitude of it...you gave them the city just like you promised. What they did with it it was their responsibility."
If only it were that simple, Odysseus thought.
~~
Soon comes part 2. It will be probably 3 parts plus a footnote section!
Just a Man. Everything is so heart-breaking, the tone, how Odysseus lowers his voices to not disturb baby Astyanax and compares him to Telemachus, how he has genuine remorse for everything he has witness and is not willing to do it; how his in the brink of tears and is almost choking of grief; the chorus starts and his determination grew, he is still in the brink of tears, the end is just plain realization.
This is song is a masterpiece. And a another that plays with my heart is "Would you fall in love with me again", it´s so raw and so sweet.
Reblog with the EPIC song that made you cry