Endogenic Systems Dni - Tumblr Posts

69constellationsinatrenchcoat
11 months ago

Occasionally chronic pain comes with a side serving of being able to swallow 15 pills in one go.

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posted by -> chronic illness chronic pain endometriosis endo endo as in endometriosis not endogenic 'systems' endogenic systems dni i have no fear of the pills not anymore take your pills endometriosis is a bitch pots potsie heds probably heds srsly we have the painkillers AND antidepressants oh and ADHD meds
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69constellationsinatrenchcoat
10 months ago

Rapture Ruckus' song "Fictional" is so DID (specifically introject) coded once you start listening to the lyrics closely.

Last night I had a dream, it felt so real

I woke up in a hospital

Please, doctor, tell me, is it all real?

'Cause it all feels so illogical

Snapbacks to these places that I've never been

Flashbacks to these faces that I've never seen

I feel it scatter like a hollow tick point blank

Waiting on the callback, tellin' me to fall back

And later..

They can knock me down now, but I ain't ever over

Is this real, or is this fiction?

This ain't what I predicted

Bangin' on the door till the door open

Drop me to the floor, though I ain't ever broken

Someone tell me what I'm missin'

Don't know what's real or fiction anymore

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Our host had a story based around the idea of fictional characters coming to life in IRL and they always said it was based on personal experiences they couldn't explain then we got diagnosed with DID did osdd osddid did osdd osdd did introject endogenic systems dni endos dni posted by -> rapture ruckus
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69constellationsinatrenchcoat
8 months ago

Thought of the evening: I would never have chosen DID; and I simply don't understand anyone who wish to have multiple personalities...

I haven't been aware of my life for the last few months, and I despise how out of control my life feels. I do not remember most of my life; those memories live with my alters but I (now) love them with my whole heart.

I would have rather I never ended up this way. We never wanted to be a system, and none of us would wish this on anyone.

However, I am glad I didn't have to go through those things alone. I'm grateful my mind put up barriers, so I don't have to live every day re-experiencing and remembering those things I've read of in my system's journal entries. I'm glad our mind kept us safe, I'm glad we did our best at the time.

I'm grateful that I had them when I did. I'm grateful I had someone watching out for us even when I didn't realise it. I'm grateful for the system who kept me as safe as they could. I'm glad I had them with me.

I love my brain for making me a family...

but I wouldn't wish it on anyone.

“I am the sum of my parts, and my parts are absolutely phenomenal.” - Jeni Haynes in her memoir The Girl in the Green Dress speaking on DID/MPD

~ host

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posted by -> did positivity did posting system talk did did osdd did system actually dissociative osdd osddid trauma survivor trauma childhood trauma complex ptsd pstd abuse survivor endogenic systems dni endos dni
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