Fear Of Missing Out - Tumblr Posts
yeah guys *grinning my teeth* it’s fine *locking my fears in* i don’t care hahahaha *tearing up* go without me it’s fine !!!!!!
Friendship Things That Hurt :(
-when you arent invited to your friends birthday party
-when your friends don't ask you to hang out with them
-seeing pictures of your friends having a great time hanging out together without you
-your friend posting a collage of a bunch of their friends on their story, but you aren't included
-when your best friend isn't best friends with you
-when all of your friends seem to be closer with each other than you are with them
-when you start to not know what to talk about
-when you try to talk about things you like, but end up feeling judged
-when none of your friends reach out to you or even notice when you're too depressed to talk to them as much as you used to
-when you feel like all your friends are leaving you
-when you fall into depression and see yourself leaving your friends and the guilt that you carry with you about that
-the fear of never being able to connect with real people as strongly as you're able to connect with fictional characters
-when two of your friends have a falling out and you're left having to pick a side
-looking back at the happy memories you had with your old friends and wondering where the fuck it all went wrong
-the struggle to know how close you even are with your friends
LATE NIGHT POST
Been feeling this way since high school. During elementary, I was in my own world and only felt sad that some classmates misunderstood or laugh (or smirk) on my cluelessness about films, shows, and trends. But in high school, there was a pull between reading books or hanging out and talking with friends or classmates about people in showbiz, or shows, films, or just be with them doing fun shizz. FOMO is strong mostly during DMs which friends chose to ignore constantly if they're busy (esp if they're with other "more fun" people).
When birthday wishes are reduced to "happy birthday" from those short yet well meaning personal messages I adore. When you finall6 able to go with people but you got so much to catch on from exes, drunken stories, and jokes which makes it awkward for both you and the people you are with.
So over the years, I gradually rewired my brain to forgo any expectations I used to have. Still, I feel all the emotions from heaviness, the emptiness, and the feeling of being forgotten. I expect people to misjudge, misunderstood, overlook, ignore, and be disappointed in me.
It is so ingrained within me that I have a hard time considering calling people as friends or to even think about the idea of being committed in a romantic relationship with someone. This is not all that bad tho coz it introduced me to be more loving on myself by myself. To not expect anything from people. To learn things I could learn so when they refuse or ignore my plea for assistance (or they abandon me) I can do it on my own. Coz you will come to a point of getting tired of making excuses for people who did not even bother to offer you one for themselves.
I miss people and moments even if they don't miss me (or remember me) at all. It's okay coz this is life and I could be forgetting others as well. We will all die one day and when it is time we should reflect if we are proud of the life we've lived up to the very last breath.
