Kidnap Dads - Tumblr Posts

Sauron and Morgoth: *Torture Maedhros for 30 years*

Maedhros: *Does not break, does not give them what they want*

Elrond: *Less than a second of puppy eyes* Please?

Maedhros: Fuck *Hands over Simarils* *Hands over all mortal possessions* *Hands over soul* *Hands over relatively ok childhood*

Morgoth: *Shocked pikachu face*

Sauron: WRITE THAT DOWN, WRITE THAT DOWN!

LotR Imladris Crew (+A few other people) Height Headcanons

I know Elrond is canonically 6'2, but it would be so much funnier if he was, like, 5'4.

(All headcanons) You have:

Gil-galad, 6'5

Maedhros, 7'6

Maglor, 6'6

Celebrian, 6'3 (Tall girlboss short malewife who is also a girlboss)

Elladan and Elrohir who are both 6'4

Legolas, 5'11

Thranduil, 6'3

Glorfindel, 5'6 (My height)

Erestor: 5'10 (Very bitter about being shorter than the twins, possibly very happy about being taller than Glorfindel)

Aragorn, 6'1

Lindir, 5'9 (My mom's height, shocked every time he realizes that he's taller than Glorfindel)

Elros, 5'8

Oropher: Where the hell did we find this fuckin' kid, man?

Elrond: My mom threw herself off a cliff because she thought that my 'adoptive' fathers were after the rock she loved more than us and then you kinda just picked me up

Elrond: I remember that very vividly.

Gil-Galad: *Mildly horrified laughter*

Some kidnapped fam for the winter season