Divorce Quartet Incorrect Quotes

Divorce Quartet Incorrect Quotes

Scott, throughout Double Life: I'm feeling it! What am I feeling? Death, probably.

Pearl: I don’t think the therapist is supposed to say ‘wow’ that many times during their first session with a client, but here we are.

Cleo: Are you mad?

Pearl: No.

Cleo: So sharpening your knives at 3 in the morning is just a hobby?

Martyn: Can I ask a dumb question?

Cleo: Better than anyone I know.

Pearl: This date is boring!

Cleo: This isn't a date. I said I was going to the store.

Pearl: Then why did you invite me?

Cleo: I didnt, I specifically said "don't come with me," then you said, "fuck you Cleo I'll do whatever I want!

Martyn: Pearl just said "I have an appetite for destruction" and then they reached down and untied my shoe.

Skizz: Who's in charge here?

Martyn, shrugging: Usually whoever yells the loudest.

Pearl, texting Scott: *sends a voice message*

Scott, texting back: I’m a little busy, is it urgent?

Pearl: No, don’t worry, just listen later.

*later*

Scott: *presses play*

Pearl's voice message: THERE’S A FIRE-

Bdubs spends two months carefully stitching his own moss cloak, but then it turns out that the actor for Skizz is allergic and he ahs to scrap the whole thing, so he wore a green shirt and huge googly eyes out of protest. He can't see through the googly eyes and bumps into everyone, but mostly Etho.

Skizz is given a suit, some scissors, and an hour in an isolated room.

Nobody checked in with BigB and his costume, so he walks in wearing a huge cookie:

Autumnwhistles idea for a last life musical made me think about the costumes and the funniest ways to make the costumes as crappy as possible.

ex: Scott's halo is a bunch of glow sticks tapes to his head that he has to hide between scenes so they can't see him entering/exiting.

or: Cleo gets the absolute worst makeup job.

or: The Watchers are just the tech crew who put a mask on before being onstage.

All the budget goes to giving Ren the most elaborate outfit.

Martyn: For someone who's 70% water, you don't look very refreshing.

Ren: BUUUUUURN!

BigB: Water cannot be burned.

Ren: EVAPORATEEEEE!

Sausage: Sometimes I talk to myself for no reason.

Sausage: Me too!

Pearl, hungover: Please tell me I'm imagining that I claimed I was king of the ducks.

Sausage: I would, but then I would be lying to the King of All Ducks.

Joey: If it pleases the court I would like to say that my opponent is TALKING SHIT!

Shelby: …

Oli: And what do I get out of this?

Gem: I'll give you a dollar.

Oli: What do you think I am? A chump? I would never do it for a dollar!

Gem: How about two dollars?

Oli: You got yourself a deal.

Shelby, after the fifth jumpscare: Why are you like this??

Xornoth: I used too much "No More Tears" shampoo as a kid and I haven't felt a single emotion since.

Xornoth: I feel like doing something stupid.

Joey: I’m stupid, do me.

After Double Life I can no longer take Soulmate Au's seriously. Completely different premise? Nope. Entirely separate fandom? Nada.

Ren, making a cup of tea: Yeah, get into that leaf juice, you sexy, sexy bee sauce.

Cleo: Hey, do you take constructive criticism?

Ren: I absolutely do not.