Life Series Incorrect Quotes

Life Series Incorrect Quotes

Bdubs: I wasn’t that drunk.

Impulse: You colored my face with a highlighter because you said I was important.

Bdubs: BECAUSE YOU ARE!

Scar: All in all, a 100% successful trip.

Bdubs: But we lost Etho.

Scar: All in all, a 100% successful trip!

Scar: BigB, I screwed up, big time.

BigB: Scar, given your daily life experiences, you’re gonna have to be more specific.

Martyn: If bees can be fish and boys can be girls, then why can't my soulmate love me?

Grian: I thought I was going to have to yell at you, but now I think I should hug you.

Tango: So according to the cease and desist order I got, apparently you can’t ‘legally’ be a lawyer if your license is ‘cut out of a cereal box’.

BigB: Hi, who's this? Grian changed all of my contacts to mythical creatures.

Bdubs: What's mine?

BigB: Gnome.

Bdubs: THEY'RE SO MEAN, I'M NOT THAT SHORT!

BigB: Oh, hey Bdubs.

Bdubs: FUCK!

*Cleo is crying after Last Life betrayal*

Etho: There there, Cleo.

Cleo, still crying: Thanks, but how did you get into my base?

Etho: Great question—

Scar: What do we think of Martyn?

*pause*

Ren: *sighs* Nice pal.

Etho: I think they're gay.

Divorce Quartet Incorrect Quotes

Scott, throughout Double Life: I'm feeling it! What am I feeling? Death, probably.

Pearl: I don’t think the therapist is supposed to say ‘wow’ that many times during their first session with a client, but here we are.

Cleo: Are you mad?

Pearl: No.

Cleo: So sharpening your knives at 3 in the morning is just a hobby?

Martyn: Can I ask a dumb question?

Cleo: Better than anyone I know.

Pearl: This date is boring!

Cleo: This isn't a date. I said I was going to the store.

Pearl: Then why did you invite me?

Cleo: I didnt, I specifically said "don't come with me," then you said, "fuck you Cleo I'll do whatever I want!

Martyn: Pearl just said "I have an appetite for destruction" and then they reached down and untied my shoe.

Skizz: Who's in charge here?

Martyn, shrugging: Usually whoever yells the loudest.

Pearl, texting Scott: *sends a voice message*

Scott, texting back: I’m a little busy, is it urgent?

Pearl: No, don’t worry, just listen later.

*later*

Scott: *presses play*

Pearl's voice message: THERE’S A FIRE-

I have been loving Secret Life so far.

Gem and the Scotts will either be the most cute cottagecore alliance and/or the next final three if both Scott & Impulse's streaks of doing well keep up.

BigB's entire vibe has been great. Please let him get the recognition he deserves this season plea-

Martyn's flip from the victor of the last season to the most pathetic wet cat of a man.

Cleo and Etho's divorce arc doing a full 180.

The Mounders is refreshingly new. Can't wait to see the silly continue.

The tasks feeling targeted in the best way possible.

The anxiety of taking any damage whatsoever.

Gem, Lizzie, & Mumbo are here.

Personal headcanon for the winners: They only remember the season they won. This is only so LL!Scott and DL!Pearl can meet.

Life Series Incorrect Quotes

Martyn: I am not a lunatic. I have the psychiatric report to prove it. A slender majority of the panel decided in my favour.

Mumbo: So Lizzie, how did your first time cooking dinner go? Lizzie: Pretty good if I do say so myself. Mumbo: Oo! Okay, what are we having? Lizzie: Alright, so for appetizers, we have a potato. Mumbo: A whole potato? Lizzie: Yes. And then for the main course, we have grilled cheese sandwiches! Mumbo: These just look like big slabs of black. Lizzie: Because that's what they are! Lizzie: And then for desert, we have chocolate. Mumbo: These are just chocolate chips? Lizzie: They sure are! Lizzie: And then for drinks, we have toast! Lizzie: *lifts up a glass of blended toast* Bon appetite!

Skizz: *pulls back the curtain while Impulse is showering* Skizz: Hey did we - stop screaming it’s me - did we run out of Cheerios?

*The Squad is on a hike* Jimmy: It’s beautiful out here. Martyn: And quiet. Jimmy: Too quiet. Martyn: Did we lose someone? *cut to Pearl with a bear in a headlock*

BigB: I have seen a lot of murders in my time, and all six of them were today.

Ren: Can you recommend a book that'll make me cry? Scott: General Mathematics 8th Grade Edition.

Grian: I’m going to dunk on you. Ren: Bring a ladder.

Joel: You’re a horrible person! Scott: Maybe. But I’m rich and I’m pretty, so it doesn’t really matter.

Scar: Wow. I keep stepping on a lot of crunchy twigs. Cleo: Those are bones, Scar. Scar: *looks straight up* Not if I never look down.

Gem, Entering Cleo's room: Scar did it again. Cleo: Peace disturbance? Gem: What no- Cleo: Arson..? Gem: NO, JESUS CHRIST, HOW MANY- Cleo: uh....Attempted murder? Gem: NO, THEY ATE ALL THE FOOD IN THE FRIDGE, BUT WHAT THE FU-

Lizzie: I am an expert at identifying birds.

Martyn: Okay, what about those ones flying over there?

Lizzie: Yep. They're all birds.