4n4mi4 - Tumblr Posts

Food log: Aug. 17, 2024

Breakfast:

Menudo, 1 1/2 cup (195cal)

Total: 195cal

Lunch:

Baby carrots, 1 cup (34cal)

Celery, 2 stalks (14cal)

Cream cheese, 1tbsp (35cal)

Total: 83cal

Dinner:

Nothing (0cal)

Total: 0cal

Exercise:

3,120 steps (103cal)

Total burned: 103cal

Todays total: 174 cals

Notes:

Rlly glad I ate low today, menudo hits ALWAYS n it’s low in calories. I ate the veggies while watching mukbang n I kept thinking abt how much I hate having an ED bc I can’t enjoy the food I love especially after relapsing. I’ve been pacing around the room or walking/running in place to get steps in. Tmrw I’ll get more steps in.

Food log: Aug. 22, 2024

Breakfast:

Lemon water (0cal)

Total: 0cal

Lunch:

Nothing (0cal)

Total: 0cal

Dinner:

Dr Pepper strawberries n cream (149cal)

Wingstop Garlic Parmesan wings, 3 wings (360cal)

Wingstop mango habanero, 3 wings (300cal)

Wingstop fries, half (185cal)

Total: 993cals

Exercise:

651 steps (21 cal)

Total burned: 21cal

Todays total: 972 cals

Notes:

Did a 17 hour liquid fast but ended up ordering wingstop after the soda bc I felt rlly weak n I had a head ache as well. I kinda regret getting the wingstop bc I love eating wings with ppl otherwise it’s depressing. So I only ate half. I should’ve just stuck with the liquid fast but at least I made it over 16 hours I guess just wish I didn’t eat a lot of cals n it’s pretty high too. I’m rlly tired.

Downside of fasting- I cannot fucking sleep n school starts in 3 DAYYSSS

Food Log: Aug. 23, 2024

Breakfast:

Rice cake (35cal)

Nutella, 1tbsp (81cal)

3 Strawberries (146cal)

Vanilla spice tea (0cal)

Total: 262cals

Lunch:

Orange creamsicle (65cal)

Total: 65cals

Dinner:

Iced honey buns (320cal)

Total: 320cal

Snack:

Ruffles (160cal)

Total: 160cal

Exercise:

333 steps (11cal)

Total burned: 11cals

Todays Total: 795 cals

Notes:

I’m SOOOO FUCKING HUNGRY. I was vv close to binging but it was mainly snacks around anyway. I needed a lil salty treat after something sweet to balance it out. Overall felt vv fkn weak n shakey today but vv glad I restricted bc I’m going to a party tmrw. I’m gonna allow myself to binge tmrw bc I’m rlly hoping there’s tacos at the party. I’ve been eye balling this frozen pizza in my bfs freezer but I’m too embarrassed to make it so hopefully my bf would be down to make it tmrw. I still gotta figure out my look for tmrw since I also might be drinking n I’m not bout to be crunked n fugly.

Food Log: Aug. 26, 2024

Breakfast:

Nothing (0cal)

Total: 0cals

Lunch:

Two pieces of gum (10cal)

Total: 10cals

Dinner:

2 Carne asada tacos (1000)

Total: 1000cals

Snack:

7 up (88cal)

Total: 88cal

Exercise:

5,769 steps (190cals)

Total burned: 190cals

Todays total: 908 cals

Notes:

I only ate two of the tacos bc I got full so I put the other two away but I’m still counting it as 1000 bc I didn’t measure nothing so I’d rather over estimate. Today was my first day of school n overall pretty good minus being late to my first two classes n almost comin to school without my face on. I like being able to fast n keep busy but I wanna be able to take care of my gut still and not have brain fog so I’ll try to eat better while still staying in my limit.

Food Log: Aug. 29, 2024

Breakfast:

2 gum (10cal)

Total: 10 cals

Lunch:

7/11 blue slush (65cal)

Salad 300cal)

2 Hot honey boneless wings (200cal)

Total: 565cals

Dinner:

Pasta salad (354cal)

Total: (354cals)

Todays total: 929 cals

Notes:

I didn’t get to take a picture of the other foods. I broke my phone so I’ve been using my tablet so I can’t track my steps or take pictures of some of the things I eating bc it feel embarrassing doing that shit with a big ass tablet. But I found out my school gives away free foods aka the salads I got and it’s rlly filling n low in cals so I’ll be going there a lot. My home girl introduced me to some new ppl and I’m suspecting one of them has an eating disorder because the way she ate a pop tart n my friend offered her more food and she said “I ate two whole poptarts that’s enough food for today” n I worried but also competitive? I hate feeling competitive when it comes to EDs bc sometimes it feels like it outweighs my concern.

I keep restricting and then binging off n on and it’s getting on my fucking nerves. How am I supposed to get skinny if I keep eating. I think what’s fucking with me more is I can’t track my steps at all either.

My header image on my profile is cake. I don’t even rlly like cake, I’m not vv fond of sweet shit. But as my ED got worse during my high school period of time I LOVED eating sweet shit, I craved it all the time. Which is probably due to my body trying to eat something to gain energy, but anyway. These last few days I haven’t been eating right (I started my period). It’s not even big ass meals it’s snacks n junk. my bfs family bought home cake from a party n as a cake connoisseur THEY BROUGHT THE GOOD SHIT. It’s a two layer vanilla cake except the FROSTING isn’t that overly sweet whipped cream shit that isn’t that great after being in the fridge, no no no no, it’s THE best fucking frosting ever. The kind of cake n frosting that lasts days in the fridge, and the frosting doesn’t get all liquidy or hard, but a nice creamy but not overstimulating texture.

I am absolutely FUCKED.

I need to fast or restrict JUST SOMETHING. I’ve been eating so bad I’m getting gross with myself, I’ve been eating so much any kind of food is unappealing all I want is fucking water, but I still keep eating out of boredom. (and bc there’s CAKE)

So I’m thinking I do a liquid fast during school, n then eat cake after. I don’t know yet, I’m not gonna just eat cake only obviously bc I don’t wanna go bald again, so I’ll eat foods with nutrients I need, but overall I need a restart rlly bad. I had a dream though that I lost my ass so I need to keep up with that as well.

Also I got a stye n it’s so fucking bad half my eyelid is closed so no makeup is gonna help. And I have to go to school with it, AMD I HAVE A PRESENTATION THIS WEEEEEK. Wish me luck y’all 🫡

Food Log: Sep. 3, 2024

Breakfast:

Nothing (0cal)

Total: 0cal

Lunch:

Half a cup of Cheddar curly fries potato corner (124cal)

Total: 124cals

Dinner:

Chicken breast (150cal)

Kraft Mac n cheese (360cal)

3 Nutella biscuit (212cal)

Total: 721cals

Todays total: 845 calories

Notes:

Didn’t get a proper picture of the fries cup bc I was eating it in the car. My bf surprised me with dinner it was rlly sweet (that gravy looking thing is chic-fil-a sauce lol) I was rlly grateful but bummed bc I was doing rlly good restricting but he’s so sweet. I ended up getting full n couldn’t finish some chicken breast n only finished the Mac n cheese. The Mac n cheese was so fucking good. I also got some fruit from my school so I’ll be eating that tmrw.

Food Log: Sep. 4, 2024

Breakfast:

Two altoids (10cal)

Total: 10cals

Lunch:

Nothing (0cal)

Total: 0cal

Dinner:

Upo ginesang with pork and shrimp (350cals)

1 cup white jasmine rice (180cals)

Total: 530cals

Snack:

Seven trolli gummy worms (27cal)

Cinnamon roll (150cal)

Total: 177cals

Todays total: 717 calories

Notes

My food looks super disorganized I hate it. The Upo is normally low in cals but bc I don’t know the true amount of cals I just overestimated it. I haven’t had my home food in so long it was nice eating it again. The cinnamon roll was rlly good there was a lot of frosting. Until I microwaved it n it got rlly liquidy n I got pissed off I just let my bf eat most of it. I didn’t take a picture of the altoids sorry. Gummy worms were mid but it felt nice eating them with my bf. Overall burning n hot day this month is so fucking hot n it’s supposed to be fall UGHHHH.

Food Log: Sep. 5, 2024

Breakfast:

3 egg omelette (237cals)

3 bacon slices (177cals)

1tbsp ketchup (18cal)

Cheese (100cals)

Onion (46cal)

Total: 662cals

Lunch:

Nothing (0cal)

Total: 0cal

Dinner:

Nothing (0cal)

Total: 0cal

Snack:

Ten tbsp chocolate brownie ice cream (328cals)

Total: 328cals

Todays total: 990 calories

Notes:

My bf made us breakfast it was really goooooood but supa high in calories. I blame the bacon. I’m rlly annoyed with how high I ate BUT it’s fine bc I lost weight around my belly and I can wear my waist trainer at its tightest setting now 🙂‍↕️. The ice cream was so fucking good but I have to pace myself so I don’t binge. I rlly want to eat more rn.So I’m gonna finish an assignment and then watch some movies that has super skinny ppl n it for inspiration 🫡

I live in Cali so it’s supposed to be fall but it’s literally 102 fucking degrees today. I still made my HAWT coffee n I still plan on lighting a fall candle and watch “autumn movies” tonight even though it’s still gonna be around 80 something degrees by the time it’s 10PM. SIGHHHHHH

I’m going to the beach tmrw with my besties tho so I’m rlly excited for that. Downside is I might go over my cal limit n I’ve been doing good these past two days so maybe tmrw will be a cheat day?. N I’ll just fast Sunday? Idk we’ll see.

Y’all ppl getting t3řm3d a lot, so PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE RESHARE THIS,

If my account gets n00ked my account will always start off with “angelic-“ and then sum right after, I need more Mutuals, (NO MINORS PLS) so I know who to follow back if my account does get n00ked, also reshare so I know who’s still active n I’ll be following back.

Food Log: Sep. 6, 2024

Breakfast:

Instant coffee (2cal)

Thirteen tbsp (454cal)

Total: 456cals

Lunch:

Nothing (0cal)

Total: 0cal

Dinner:

Upo with pork and shrimp (350cal)

White jasmine rice (180cal)

Total: 530cals

Todays total: 986 calories

Notes:

I ate the Upo left overs I had from the other day so I overestimated it again, I didn’t finish the rice though but I’m still counting it. The coffee was literally perfect, just the creamer being high in calories is what gets on my nerves. I wish I could track my steps. Today was super draining bc of the heat but I got a lot of work done so that’s good. I feel so bleh. I wanna restrict lower I hate being in the 900s.

It better be häAaAaæ HaàAaaÆ haAaáÀ weather by September 22 or ima light this bitch on fire

AND YOU’RE ALL COMING WITH ME

Guyyyysss I just got back home from hanging out with my besties. We ended up not going to the beach but went to a night market, and we took a lot of pictures. I look like shit. I thought I looked good leaving the house but I look so ugly on the pictures. I look so fat my face looks so fat my arms look so fucking fat. I have GOT TO lose weight before Halloween. Me and one of my best friends r gonna be the white and black swan, I can’t look fat in such a beautiful costume. More motivation, but I wanna hide everything abt my body. I feel so fucking ugly. God I just wanna be beautiful :(

I was literally just 137lbs, I checked my weight this morning and I’m at 127lbs now, but I don’t look like it :(

Food Log: Sep. 10, 2024

Breakfast:

Hot pocket pepperoni (319cal)

Total: 319cals

Lunch:

Jaritos tamarindo soda (141cal)

Torta asada (550cal)

Total: 691cals

Dinner:

Nothing

Total: 0cal

Snack:

Celsius energy drink wild berry (10cal)

Total: 10cals

Exercise:

913 steps (60cal)

Total: 60cals

Todays total: 959 cals

Notes:

I went over my limit but I got steps in and burnt it. It’s still rlly high which I’m still upset about I feel like even if I work it out it’s not doing shit. I didn’t get a picture of the jaritos or at least that shit didn’t fucking save oh well.

Food Log: Sep. 11, 2024

Breakfast:

Lemon water (0cal)

Total: 0cal

Lunch:

Two pepperoni hot pockets (638cals)

Total: 638cal

Dinner:

Nothing (0cal)

Total: 0cal

Snack:

Celsius energy drink (7cals)

Total: 7cals

Exercise:

3,267 steps (94cal)

Total burned: 94cals

Todays total: 551 cals

Notes:

I didn’t go to school this day bc I was severely sleep deprived but I got some laundry in so that’s nice. I’m really glad I can count my steps again. I made an entire daily necessities and routine for a balance of school n overall daily routine. I’m excited for the restart week :)

Food Log: Sep. 12, 2024

Breakfast:

Celsius energy drink (10cal)

Total: 10cal

Lunch:

Chicken & bacon salad (357cal)

Total: 357cals

Dinner:

Asada quesadilla (393cal)

Total: 393cals

Snack:

Celsius energy drink (7cal)

Green tea mochi (100cal)

Total: 107cals

Exercise:

3,551 steps (117cal)

Total burned: 117cal

Todays total: 750 cals

Note:

I love Celsius so much it’s the only energy drink that doesn’t give me anxiety while still giving me good energy n it’s low in cal. This is A NEEEEED if ur a full time college student with anxiety n sleeping problems, I highly recommend.Today was nice I love spending time with my friend (literally only have one college friend) and I found a nice spot to study at if I want to study in nature 🥳