Darth Sidious - Tumblr Posts
The Sith code, but pretty
Happy May the 4th and Revenge of the 5th!
“How long a Father can pretend not to be one” | by Deependra Singh
I think one of the most shocking things I had ever read on this site was the fact that after ROTJ, some dude apparently approached Luke with like, his Dad's will, and just told him, "Congrats, you are the sole beneficiary of Lord Vader's will. Enjoy this castle on the planet where your dad choked your mom and got chopped up and roasted like a marshmallow by his brother/dad. Also here are like 50 billion credits."
I have no idea whether this is real or even canon, but can you fucking imagine. Like, Vader, after finding out that he had a son, a son that he spent the last twenty years thinking that he murdered with his wife (he is two steps from Heathcliffing her mausoleum on Naboo), goes to "yes. I will put my affairs in order, and add my rebel son, who is wanted in every star system, in my fucking will." And then he does. Lucas wants me to believe that Darth Fucking Vader, who promoted his captain like six positions for convenience, actually took the time to put his child in his will, or even has a will.
Also, the question arises of how or even why the Emperor pays him. Like, Vader is the Supreme Leader of the Imperial Forces, and Palpatine should be rejoicing that a position that would normally extract millions of credits per annum is filled by a dude who genuinely does not give a fuck about money. Like, what the fuck you paying him for? SOMEONE MAKE IT MAKE SENSE!
I suppose the money could come from his spaceship collection, but still. how much are they worth? Does Vader have a bunch of vintage spaceships that cost a bunch that he upkeeps as a hobby? He crashes like, every single one of his ships so a pile of scrap metal can't be worth that much.
In a universe where canon makes as much sense as Ep VII, I broke at Vader and his fucking space Will. Someone please explain this.
I'm going to be a heretic and say that the Jedi's problem wasn't that they were involved the Senate, it was that they weren't involved enough in the Senate. The Jedi should have moved out to the Unknown Regions if they didn't want to deal with the responsibilities of the Republic. They should have involved in politics by voting for leaders, running for election and utilizing their representation to push for their interests and agenda.
"but they didn't want to be involved-" look here people, you do not choose to get involved in politics. Politics involves everyone; you have a choice to play or not play. There is no option to opt out. By not playing, you forfeit the game to your opponents, and you lose before you begin.
That's how Palpatine wins. He sets the game, and the Jedi forfeit; they were doomed to lose from the start.
palpatine is just an embodiment of modern government.
This is in no way an endorsement of Palpatine, but the premise of his crimes is so weird to me.
Like, the most evil guy in existence's crimes are:
Using the power of his negative emotions to practice a cult religion
Puppeteering a war between two factions in the galaxy to install a takeover
Committing genocide
Installing himself as a monarch/dictator (they call him an Emperor, and he rules an empire; wouldn't he be a monarch?)
Assorted war crimes (i can't remember them all)
None of these things, except the first one, are things that literally any government on this planet hasn't done.
The US government? Puppeteered plenty of wars.
The US government? Has committed genocide.
The US government? Has committed plenty of war crimes in other wars with state approval.
The US may not have become an empire, but there are plenty of regimes in other countries and throughout history where rulers seize power and declare themselves rulers: Napoleon, Caesar, even more recently like the Kims of North Korea.
It's just so tragic. Modern government is the bad guy in the Star Wars prequels; the embodiment of modern government is literally cartoon evil. Isn't that lovely?
palpatine is just an embodiment of modern government.
This is probably elaborated on a lot more in detailed meta, but for all of the shit that Lucas has pulled and all of his questionable decisions, Palpatine is probably his greatest triumph as a villain within narrative. Yes, he is absolutely a cartoon with no redeeming qualities, and Anakin definitely has a more dynamic character arc, but it's still incredible.
Star Wars as a franchise is associated with war and wartime: laser sword battles, epic forbidden romance, last stand trench runs against powerful enemies. It's all action, stylized violence and "rule of cool." There is good character writing and plot of course, but the public perception of Star Wars as a whole is about the cool space wizards and laser guns.
So it's absolutely curious that Lucas, in a trilogy that he said was geared towards children, had his villain do none of the things that made Star Wars so famous. Palpatine never fought ever. Except in Revenge of the Sith, Palpatine's horrible crimes all stemmed from his politics, and his cunning. Part of the Jedi's blindness to Sidious was that he was playing them on a field that they didn't expect: politics.
The Jedi are not politicians, nor have any interest in politics; the movies make this painfully clear. (The fact that the Council just goes and attempts to execute Palpatine, a popular leader who was "democratically" elected-I will give the Jedi credit; Palpatine is a monster, and killing him then and there was probably necessary- shows that there aren't the most politically minded) Palpatine literally does more damage to the entire galaxy that has repercussions for a generation- seriously, people like Biggs probably lived and died within the Empire- than Anakin could ever do during Operation: Knightfall or even as his tenure as Vader. And the Jedi can't do anything to stop it because they refused to play the game. In fact, one could make the argument that refusing to play only meant that Palpatine could carry out his agenda even faster.
It's almost like the bad guy won because any damage wreaked by an army of space wizards can be done a thousandfold by one politician. And it's like the lesson is that if you turn a blind eye to the injustices in your government, the corruption festers until it turns into something unspeakably horrid, and by then it'll be too late.
That's something to think about.
It's always "the Jedi failed at this," "Anakin should've done that," and never "Darth Sidious is so good at his job, he deserves to get Sith Lord of the month."
Some Star Wars Things to Keep You Awake at Night
If ‘Amidala’ was Padme’s ‘Political Name’ and ‘Naberrie’ was her true surname and any person on Naboo serving in any Political Office used a Political name during their tenure in Public Office than does that mean that Palpatine isn’t the Emperor’s real surname and if it’s not than what IS his real surname?
In TESB Vader offers to finish Luke’s Force Training, overthrow the Emperor together, end the destructive conflict and bring order to the galaxy. Fast-forward to RotJ and Vader tells Luke that the Emperor will show him the true nature of the Force and that the Emperor will be his Master from now on. Why the shift in thinking? Is he just saying words just in case the Emperor was watching them? Doesn’t Vader know about the Sith’s Rule of Two: one Master and one Apprentice? Wait, he would have to know since he’s been a Sith for 23ish years but if he’s saying that the Emperor will be Luke’s Master . . . .
Oh, I think I see now, he wanted Luke to live and having Luke replace him as the Sith Apprentice was the only solution he could find to keep his son, the child he thought was dead for 20 years, alive.
In the second Rush Clovis Arc Captain Typho had a medical droid called to tend to Clovis’s injuries and the medical droid put Clovis in contact with Dooku at Sidious’s request. Does this mean that ALL the medical droids in Padme’s building have hidden programs that have them report to Sidious? Is it just her medical droids? Did she get treated at any point in her pregnancy by a medical droid that would have reported her condition to Sidious? If so did he have the Droid tell her that there was just one? If things didn’t work out with Anakin was he going to take one of the twins and if Padme was alone and drugged she wouldn’t know possibly that there was two. Did Sidious have other Droids spying on Senators?
Dooku left the Order after TPM and Qui-Gon’s death but at some point Sidious reached out to him and converted him to the Dark Side BEFORE TPM as he was responsible for Sifo-Dyas death about the same time as TPM and ordering the Clone Army. How did Sidious meet Dooku and why did he convert him to his side and just how many other Jedi were converted to the side of the SIth, not just during the PT time frame, but in the decades and centuries before TPM?
Did these secretly evil Jedi recruit Barriss Offee to their cause? Barriss did mention she was hanging out with some Jedi that had a certain view on the War. If so did they ask her to frame Ahsoka for the Temple Bombing?
If Maul hadn’t been killed on Naboo would Dooku have stayed in the Jedi Order and if so what role would he serve? Would he have voiced concerns about fighting in a galactic war? Would he have tried to divide the Jedi Order in two due to the war?
Or would Dooku have still left but Maul would have filled General Grievous’s shoes since Grievous possibly a replacement for Maul?
Interestingly enough for nearly the whole conversation Vader keeps ‘eye contact’ with the Emperor and only looks down/bows his head near the end of it. However in s2 e1 of Rebels Vader spends either the whole report/conversation looking at the deck/projector in front of him instead the hologram of his Master or looked at it only after a certain point in the conversation; I can’t remember.
There are some people that claim that people who are lying are more likely to keep eye contact with the person they’re lying to so they can gauge just how much you believe them instead of avoiding your gaze. And seeing Vader was basically denying that he knew anything about the possibility that Luke Skywalker = Anakin Skywalker’s son he might have wanted to keep an eye on his Master.
If not than, depending on what the Emperor allows from Vader, not staring at the deck/lowering his gaze could have been Vader’s way of letting Sidious know that he wanted to challenge him as the Sith Master. After all Vader’s the one that suggests that they attempt to Turn Luke to the Dark Side and make him an ally and the Emperor seemed to really like that idea.
I mean wasn’t he all excited when he learned from Aphra that Vader had been up to all sorts of Sith like shenanigans behind his back and basically told Vader that he had become afraid that Vader had lost all his ambition to be a true Sith years ago?
one of my favorite scenes in The Empire Strikes Back (and the Skywalker Saga in general):
Palpatine: “The young Rebel who destroyed the Death Star. I have no doubt this boy is the offspring of Anakin Skywalker.”
Vader:
Me *supposed to be trying to fall asleep*: Oh my gosh, none of the Jedi Starfighters had hyperdrives! Palpatine didn’ want them to escape if they were in a starfighter when the time came to execute Order 66!
That sneaky, clever, manipulative monster.
He even declares that the Force is more powerful than the Desth Star. The Jedi liked to say just how powerful the Force is; Yoda basically repeats the sentiment to Luke: size matters not.
“Be Careful What You Ask For.”
Reminder: Darth Sidious is canonically the ONLY Sith Lord/apprentice/darksider not obsessed with Obi-Wan Kenobi
Xanatos, Maul, Ventress, Grievous, Darth Vader, Dooku, and Savage Opress were coo coo for Cocoa Puffs about him
His locks were simply too luscious and his one liners too annoying
ok. I have been silent but it is time. let’s talk about the magnitude of the double crossing, double agents and straight up fuckery that’s going on here.
a team of bounty hunters have been order by dooku to abduct chancellor sheev palpatine.
dooku has been ordered by darth sidious to carry out this plan.
dooku has tasked a team of bounty hunters with the job of completing the abduction.
obi-wan has been sent undercover as a bounty hunter to assist in the abduction.
only the jedi council and sheev palpatine know the bounty hunter rako hardeen is actually obi-wan.
obi-wan will act to prevent the abduction from the inside.
the abduction of sheev palpatine.
which was order by sheev palpatine.
because darth sidious is sheev plapatine.
sheev palpatine knows all of this is taking place.
sheev palpatine arranged his own abuduction.
sheev palpatine then placed a double agent to prevent his abduction.
the abduction he ordered in the first place.
sheevception.
Star wars as subjects
Luke Skywalker:Philosophy and History
Leia Organa:Political Science and Diplomacy
Han Solo: Auto Mechanics and Aerospace Engineering
Obi-Wan Kenobi: History and Philosophy
Yoda: Psychology and Religion/Zen Meditation
Darth Vader:Military Strategy and Engineering
Padmé Amidala: Political Science and International Relations
Chewbacca: Mechanical Engineering and Woodworking/Metalworking:
Lando Calrissian: Business Management and Economics
Emperor Palpatine: Politics and Philosophy
Jagannath
——————
“He took back his tooth,”
“I beg your pardon?”
“Our new champion. Before he killed his opponent, he took back his tooth.”
…
“What’s his name?”
…
“Prisoner 11240?”
——————————————
“That’s him,” … “He’s the one, isn’t he?”
“Yes, that is the one,”
“I hear he answers to Jagannath,” … “They say it means—”
——————————————
“Chee moto, mando sangui.”
“Meaning?”
“ ‘The whole thing runs on blood.’ ”
——————————————
Lockdown is gooooooood, ya’ll, jfc.
Excuse me while I prepare to cry watching an old man have an existential crisis in a sand dune in two days.