Mew Is Ranting :oP - Tumblr Posts

:33 < rant

:33 < being a system is just.... so scary. i constantly have mental breakdowns, idont permit "myself" to look at "me" in the mirror, idont know who "i"am because iam not me. its a group of people. it feels so insane, like im not real. people call me by my name in which idont realise iam me or at least supposed to be. ihave so much confusion in life, so much amnesia and unawareness, its crazy. i just want to be freed and alone. we dont particularly like each other either. icant stare at myself normally. i seem to have to have a mental breakdown. ifeel so out of place. so abnormal. the others themselves get scared. we barely know who we are. am i the host ? really ?? did the actual host go dormant years ago ?? i question this daily because it dosent seem like im the actual me more like a fake version, or a figment of the original. a place holder. yea sure, icall myself the original, but am i really ?? maybe buzy knows, but then again buzy also is a little.... much. shes trying to.... well idont really wanna say it so yea. she wouldnt exactly be of much help. maybe all the others named s ? imeannnn theyre kinda the same as buzy. and its not exactly like we talk to eachother. imean yea, our headspace is super boring, but we kinda enjoy being alone and dont talk to eachother so iguess. thats. alright. idont know im probably just gonna stop this

yooo wassup my homie nepeta!! i got a question!!!! so, what r your fav ICP songs?? mine are prolly miracles (totes obligatory for every hs fan Bo)) ), here comes the carnival n down with the clown!!!! cant wait to hear what yours are!! :33

:33 < hiiii !! honestly ? idont think icould ever pick a favourite !! (and not just cause of my decidiophobia xoD) but because theyre all so great and so unique in their own way !! i really enjoy all the songs, from the yum yum bedlam albums, to the great milenko albums, to the bang ! pow ! boom ! albums, to the music that shaggy and violent j make separatly in their own time, just all of it as a whole !! sorry ididnt give a proper answer, but if it makes it better, ithink my first icp song was either queens or juggalo juice !! icant exactly remember which (back with the awful memory x3) but they definitely are 2 great songs and im glad i started with them !! definitely have listened to more of their songs though now, idont exactly think ineed to choose because theyre all so great in their own way !! anyways, sorry for like,, the whole paragraph,, that was a bit much but yea !! hope that somewhat answered your question :3 and thanks !! :33

B33 < system rant (again, iknow, im sorry)

:33 < iknow i say im a system but in reality, idont even know if im a system. its more of a precaution than a statement. yes, im a system, but am i really ? everyday i feel as though im faking, and even though ihave little notes from when others were fronting, or proof of people interacting with my alters, its so daunting and just makes me feel like im faking. idont always switch. idont have an inner world as iam unable to see one and never will be. we dont have any communication, as we lack the feel/need to talk to eachother, we (most of us) arent friends, and we lack healthy relationships. yea, my trauma made me multiple people, but what if it actually didnt and iwas lying to myself ? its so overwhelming being a system. i worry im faking my system hood and actually just lying, but when i even see that ihave the notes from the others and the headmates talking with the folks iknow, it still just persistently feels like im faking. so yea, im a system. at least, ithink so. isay so. idont know though. take that as a warning, a precaution, a note, not an exact statement. just a little "watch out if idont sound like myself because im a system and my alters might be fronting so thats why iwont sound like myself !!" not a "yea, we're a system and iknow that for a fact !! we're really proud of it, and it is of much importance to us !!" so yea, here we sit. or i. idont know for a fact. am i a system ? am i ? am i really.

haiii!!! i really like how much you advocate “uncommon” alterhuman identities!! the passion!! the care!! its all really cool. i appreciate you for that. my friend is a fictionkin (gregory of yardale) and i think thats pretty damn cool. one small problem though. i kind of dont understand alterhuman identities all that well! :( from my understanding, its when people have a spiritual connection with a certain nonhuman thing,, (or sometimes believe they were said thing in their past life),, but ive also seen some people say they think they ARE said thing instead of human. which i dont know if its true. it’d be pretty odd to not believe you were human after…you know, youre literally classified as human and al that jazz. i cant explain it. but at the same time, i dont wanna be judgemental…and theres gotta be some explanation. something deeper. something to destroy the misconception of “odd”, but i cant find it. :(

-🕸️📺 anon

:33 < velopppp !! :oDD im relally tabnkful for that !! honestly, i jusut want a community in whoch peopel dont feel left out !! where people arebt unseen, we are all fair !! thats what drives me iguess :o)) and thank yiu !! <3 also they sound really interesting !! ^_^ and, for the not unnderstanding allterhuman identitues that weel: honestky ? for starters, idont always truly believe youHAVE to understand. as long as you as a being can respect it, youdont always have to understand. [pt: as long as you as a being can respect it, youdont always have to understand.]

B33 < youcan be respectful, and kind, but if youdont understand, thats ok !! if youwant to understand, thats great !! if youdo understand, thats awesome !! its fine not to get things, you are not compelled to know everything !! but for starters, you arent wrong !! alterhumanity can derive from spirituality (eg: religion, believing your nonhuman soul was put into a human body, past lives, ectect) but it isnt always !! there are many reasons one would be nonhuman !! (im not speaking on all nonhuman behalves when isay tghis, but) it could be duue to mentally beleiving you are an alterhuman (psychological alletrhyman), being a fictive (taht is a system/plural term for anyone who doesnt know), delusions/mental conditions, (zoanthropy/lycanthropy, trauma, mental illness, ect) or maybe just being taht thing because they are that thing. most people say they "are" that thing because its the best way to describe their alterhumanity for them, like they (probably) know arent physically that being/thing, but saying they are it just makes sense instead of pputtijg the spiritual/psychological/anything else label on it. also, some people might physically believe they arent human because of delusions or mental illness, in which case it is not hest to reality check them. holotheres and physical nonhumans can identify like that because of their mental illness, but they do not have to. (please remember: not all physically nonhuman beings are alterhuman/holoheres/physical nonhumans, and not all holotheres/physical nonhumans have disabilities that impact them being physically nonhuman/have their disabilities impact them being physically nonhuman)

B33 < although on anithher note, ihave seen some news a while back that there used to be predatory activity with people claiming they could physically transform into their 'type, and would give steps on how to "do it" but im not sure if those "watch out" posts were made to harm physical nonhumans/mentally ill beings that identified as not human physically, or if it was true and there were actual adults saying this to minors so please do watch out. with that being said, please note that not every alterhuman experience is the same, if anyone had anything to add, whether personal experiences, thoughts and opinions, or other, feel free to !! thanks !! ^_^