Obey Me Humor - Tumblr Posts
cue reading this post.
I automatically imagine MC as a trainer's version of Demimon (Demi+pokemon) yelling "Diavolo I choose you!"
My Chaotic MC Ep. 3
Luke must be protected
*some demon ass bullying Luke*
MC: “Prepare your anus you dick head” literally ready to throw hand with a demon
Luke: “MC No!”
Demon: “and what are you gonna do human?”
MC: *literally summons one of the strongest demons in Devildom (up to you but for me 💯 Lucifer lol)*
****
Bonus: receives lecture about summoning them to protect Luke
MC: “first of all I was threatened and second of all that is my child and third of all I don’t remember there being rules to when I can summon you”
-Vex👶🏼
May I request hc's or whatever you'd like to do for the Obey Me x Castlevania? Fem!MC that's a descendent of the Belmont clan (which I think you had as being from Lilith's second child.) and/or carrying on the Belmont tradition of monster/demonslaying in the modern/current time? I don't know if you include the Castlevania games but there was an active Belmont during 1999/2000's during Soma's time. With maybe Belphie, Beel, and Barbatos or Diavolo?
Okay, I'll try to write this, actually it's the first time I write an order,
so please don't judge.
I will write in the temporal order in which they contacted s/o.
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Diavolo:
₯ He was surprised at first, the additional presence of Y/o was a very welcome surprise!
₯ He thought it was cute and polite, she looked like a shy version of his friend! Look Luci she even has white hair like you! (please Y/o stop calling him lord Diavolo he just wants to be her friend ° (> o <) °)
₯ Very pleased with her development in class, although a little worried because she didn't interact much with her siblings.
₯ At least she was able to make friends with demons outside the circle, well is the program still making progress?
₯ Initially I was a little worried about the disappearance of some students, hmm so they had plans to S/o glad you took care of that Barbatos...
₯ When he discovered his ancestry, he didn't know whether to be scared or excited that there was a Belmont on the show!
₯ what if she's a descendant of Lilith and her friend's great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-law'? even better!
₯ Interested in her perspective on the program.
⌛ Barbatos:
⌛Shocked initially because he hadn't anticipated this!
⌛He ends up keeping it a secret as he wasn't sure he should tell his lord that he couldn't see the future of S/O, he became suspicious within thirty minutes of being informed that his alternate version had interfered with could spoil the future that he couldn't see the future of S/O.
⌛It is the first demon that made a pact with S/o (if it had been released to the public, it would have entered the record book by record of pact made in less than 24hrs. (mc made it in 2 days))
⌛Oh Y/o so is that where you're disposing of the bodies? what a wonderful idea to use the parts as ingredients to feed the gluttony avatar, a practical and waste-free plan, here let me see which recipe can use these substitute ingredients hmmm....how about salamander tongue?
⌛ He is delighted at the prospect of serving a Belmont, even if he is untrained.
⌛Is the first to help S/O when he is having doubts in the mystic arts or having problems with his ancestral magical nature.
⌛ Likes when S/O uses the whip, and an excellent training partner.
⌛Internally smug about having S/o as his mistress (oh..mc got a high grade in basic demonic linguistics...How interesting, did you hear that S/o is learning Enochian? I admire your perseverance in learning 2 different languages who knew advanced demonic language classes were so boring, hello Solomon my congratulations on the new pact, is a noble demon of the division of wrath no less, I have learned that they can only be tamed in battle! ... I find determination fascinating that you humans have see S/o for example I heard she hunted down a nest of rebel incubus yesterday!)
🐝 Beel:
🐝I didn't care about humans at first, I felt a little sad because the exchange program student had a companion so she wouldn't be alone.
🐝The friend was kind to have offered the food she had, although she is very quiet, I think she is afraid of me.
🐝Y/o do you want to train with me? a sparring match are you sure? I don't want to hurt you after all I'm very strong.
🐝(they fight and he is intrigued/amazed by her skills, she kicks hard!, the fight was amazing although it was annoying to elude your brother and his annoying questions, he may be walking crookedly but that's nothing!)
🐝When he heard that there were some students missing he got a little worried about Y/O, he knows she knows how to defend herself one more thing is a friendly sparring match with rules another was to face demons prepared to kill!..oh Barbatos already took care of that hmm...GOOD.
🐝 oh Mc S/o cooked this for me, she said she was taking lessons with barbados, I don't know what it is but it tastes divine!
🐝 yes I am also happy that she is not afraid of me, maybe we are even friends!
🐝Wait Y/o is a Belmont? oh that's why you fight so well!
🐄 Belphie:
🐄 What is this Lucifer? the summon is brought another human? hmmm... the way it's going it seems like I don't even need it lift a finger to end the program, you're already doing all the work for me.
🐄 Hello mc could you help me? I'm a human and of course! Hmm? aren't you Mc? how do i know about mc? oh well lucifer likes to chatter a lot, Is it not like him? Is that what you know in human?! Wait where you're going! What do you mean you won't help me!! A demon?! Tch.... how did you find out?
🐄He didn't see but S/o after that.
🐄 After the events of lesson 16 he found out he didn't want to get on her bad side in the worst way.
🐄 Who knew that S/o could have a sadistic streak? she has the right to be mad at him and he understands but she couldn't have created another form of punishment! because he had to be stuck in Cerberus' kennel and because his clothes smell like MEAT S/O!
🐄 LUCIFER YOUR GRANDDAUGHTER YOU KILL ME! Belmont or not he shouldn't be going through this S/o!!!
----
I hope you like this one as I said it's the first time I do this, besides that I had a little difficulty writing Belphi and Diavolo
*After another successful dance battle
Belphie looks at Y/O with a hint of mischief.
Belphie: You know Y/o after all that drama discovering your super hunter heritage....
Bel looks worried: belphie no...
Belphie :.... it surprises me that you still need our help to win these battles, I wonder if such an inheritance is not all they say after all.
Y/o ignores him: ......
S/o walks to the dance floor* Leads the Dance without losing the rhythm and still scores all the bonuses and special moves* and even breaks the record for the best dance done* (record done by Barbatos).
S/o ends the battle, your enemies are dead on the ground and walk past Belphie towards the door, look out of the side of your eyes and wipe the invisible dust off your shoulder before continuing walking and leaving the room*.
Belphie: ......
The undateables(-Barbatos): .....
The brothers: .....
Barbatos displaying an aura of smugness*
MC: Just so you know S/o was champion 12 times in a row in international dance competitions.
No mercy
Levi: Nooooooo!!!!! Mc: I took what you hear?! Levi dramatically waving his hands while holding his DDD: The result of the draw for the ultra-rare shadow lord figurine with his best friend harry performing the iconic Hi-five move is out today!
But somehow I couldn't be drawn even after I bought more than half of the tickets! this is the worst week of my life! Is not fair!
Mammom: calm down, I'm sure you can get another figurine, besides isn't that an exaggeration?
Levi: Exaggeration!? Of course a Normie like you wouldn't understand the gravity of the situation! This isn't the first time something has gone wrong!
Levi: to give you an idea of what a bad week it was, on Monday someone named @_Tw1l19ht broke my record in the Devilkart game......
--------
S/o: lying on her bed, in the dark of the night she holds a DDD with the screen celebrating another victory in Devilkart*
--------
Levi: .....I got banned from an anime debate group of my favorite demon!.......
-----
S/O on mobile reporting account @h3rr4_f0rev2r*
-------
Levi:..fourth my orders came all wrong....
----
S/o changing color orders and changing game orders*.
------
Levi: ......It's only on Thursday that I found out that my Akuzom account was hacked!.....
------
S/o watching levi fiddle with the phone and seeing him logging in via cell*
-----
Levi:....yesterday I found out that "The Magical Ruri Hana: Demon Girl" changed his voice actor because the previous one had to take medical leave because he broke his leg! ..........
--------------------------
S/o sitting on a park bench in front of a staircase that leads to a walkway in the shopping center, reading a book in front of her a couple of demons passes and 1 of the demons demon trips and falls down the stairs, soon there is a sickening crack. followed by screams *.
----------------
Levi: .......you understand the gravity of the situation my Runi-chan is going to lose her precious voice because the idiot voice actor broke his leg! I don't even know why he decided to ask for a medical leave! what has the leg with the voice!!
Mc with wide eyes puts his hands on his mouth: Levi this is horrible
Levi: Yes! absolutely horrible and now this of all things happens! Is not fair!
Mammon says sarcastically: Wow, nothing you wish for is working for you, it looks like you've been cursed.
Levi: Whether it was or not I don't care I just want this shit to end!
-------------------
*Meanwhile in the castle kitchen.
Barbatos: Do you think that was enough? I'm sure master leviathan is about to burst into tears.
S/o:..... he still hasn't apologized to Mc...
S/o looking into her demon's eyes before turning her attention to the vegetable she was cutting, raising the blade she says: ...until then I will follow the motto sensei Lawrence
S/o punctuates while counting the vegetable: ...no mercy.
Gym.
Mc: you know Y/o I'm glad you're accompanying Beel at the gym!
Mc: with so much going on I feel like I'm neglecting him a little bit.
S/o stares at Mc*
Mc scratches the back of his head shyly: err... although he is not a fan of working out and such....
Mc waves his hands trying to appease his friend: It's not for nothing! it's just that Beel can be pretty intense.
Mc: Anyway I'm glad you decided to be his friend.
Y/o crosses her arms leaning against the wall in a typical pose*
Yes, I am
S/o speaks casually: you can come if you want
----------------------------------------
At the gym*
Beel sweaty in a workout outfit doing barbell squats.*
S/o slightly sweaty sipping the water with eyes half closed, strategically close to the Leg Extension machine that is behind the ignorant demon, watching the delicious lunch from under the eyelashes*.
MC looking at S/o with heavy eyes realizing the real reason her friend approached the gluttony avatar.
MC communicating telepathically/with a bitch look at S/o: seriously?
S/o feeling the look, look at mc and reply in the same can: You can't judge
The game
* Angels presentation scenario. Luke😠 :........I am NOT a chihuahua i'm an angel!
S/O looks at the little boy and says in a monotone :....chibi-chan
Mc mentally facepalm*
Men:...
Luke😤 : I'm not a chibi!
S/o teases, still in a monotone:...Small and cute, chibi-chan
Luke: stop it I'm not a chibi! I'm older than you
S/o stares :.....
S/o: I'll stop this if you answer my question
Luke:?!
MC:!
S/o: if you answer correctly I'll stop calling him chibi, instead I'll call him luke-san...
MC:!!
S/o: but if you make a mistake, I'll keep calling you chibi and you'll have to call me One-san.
Simeon: lu-
Luke: done
Y/o: It's a deal then....
Y/o: what is the result of the combination of 2 numbers of 2?
men: .....
Luke 😡: What kind of question is that! I look like a child to you!! of course 2+2 = 4!
Y/o: wrong...
Luke:!!
Y/o: I never hinted that the question was a math question....
Luke:!!!
Diavolo: But s/o..vc asked the result of the combination of 2 numbers of 2.
Y/o: yes ..... but I never asked the sum of 2 numbers of 2 but their combination.
Y/o:...Luke you got the question wrong and now you have to buy it with a combination...
Luke: That's cheating! You can't do that!...
Luke: I refuse to do that!.
Y/O: I thought the angels kept their promise......
Y/o: looks like I'm wrong.....
Luke: we buy when we are not deceived-...
Simeon: now...now luke, a promise is a promise we can't go against our word.
Mc sighs* : Y/o he's already spent 1 attempts and if I remember well, two more, how much time does he have to answer before he loses?
Y/o: 3 weeks.
Luke: Wait, do you have any other chances?
MC: you agreed before even asking about the rules of the game.
Lucifer: game?
Mc:Y/o holds a question and answer game from time to time with 3 fixed rules....
Mc: each party must follow these rules, and act in accordance with the commitment provided...
Diavolo: Sounds like fun....
Mc: Not so much, it's common for her to actually do that....
Mc: she doesn't play/challenge anyone if she's not absolutely sure that the result is according to what she intends...
Mc: ....you should have paid attention in the context of the luke question...
Diavolo gets excited :seriously?! I would like to play....
and keeps looking in the direction of S/o:.... this game then S/o ??....
Empty space*
Luke: where's S/O?
Barbatos: I think it went to class as the bell is about to start
With these words the bell rings*
If we had to replace MC: I think it would make Luci go on Diavolo's shit list 5 minutes after we met because he would make me cry and that would suck for him. Reblog and tell me what you would do if you replaced mc...
I'm sure Luci would just feel a new level of respect for the mc, because whether in heaven or hell he couldn't get away from the Headache paperwork.
So non-Lilith related MC being a very tired, very stressed out angel. No, they don't know how they ended up in this situation either and would like to leave please. On the other hand, Michael can't bother them here and they were technically summoned. By summoning bylaws they can't return until they fulfill their summoner's wish.
So they guess they have to attend school since that was the purpose of the summoning. Honestly how did Lucifer and Diavolo, who had one job, screw up this badly? Even funnier if it's one of the higher ranks of angels.
Of course their Virtue is Patience because if it wasn't they'd have set the entirety of the Celestial Realm on fire by now. Honestly Lucifer's brothers are easy mode after dealing with Michael, Raphael, and Gabriel for millennia.
This is funny if Angel!MC is a new high rank angel that took one of the brother's position after the fell and become demons.
It would be super awkward while complimenting. They slip their position. And one of the brothers eyes widen and look at them and say
"YOU TOOK MY POSITION!?!?"
The invitation
S/o stares at Satan with poke face*
Satan looks back with a smile*
S/o him stares, looking into his eyes *
Sat Widens smile*
Mc finds the two staring at each other in the middle of the hallway*
Mc: ok what is happening with you guys?
S/o in a monotone: It's nothing
Sat in a gentle tone: Yes mc we are just entering an understanding.
S/o: yeah, there's nothing to worry about.
-----Earlier -----
Sat: I know it was you
S/o raises his eyebrow*: oh could you clarify?
Sat smiles: I know it was you who made those pranks.
S/o responds in a neutral tone: do you have any evidence to prove this accusation?
Sat: you are never where you should be and you always have an excuse when asked...
Sat: I also know that you have a powerful ally...
S/o:...
Sat: Your abilities interest me, and may well be used for the greater good...
S/o:...
Sat:...what I mean is that I want to use them for a purpose, something great that no one else has ever participated in...
Sat:...Rejoice that you among all of your race have the honor of being invited to this society...
Sat:...where few are chosen to participate.
S/o has tic in the eye * stares at Sat
------------------ present moment-------------------
Sat: I'll leave you to your thoughts S/O, so please think very carefully about my invitation
walks by her and pats her shoulder*
Mc looks at this interaction*
Mc looks back at her friend with the look of someone who wants answers and nothing will stop screens*.
S/O Sighs, pinching the curve of her nose, anticipating a major headache.-
---------
league meeting
“Who did this to you?”
S/o could only hear the background noises, but she could recognize those footsteps even from miles away.
When approaching the spot They see her lying on the floor, she can barely distinguish shapes and colors, she knew him whether or not she could see she knew they were angry, and when they crouch to approach her, S/o can't help but to shrink.
They say nothing until one of her hands caresses her right cheek, and now they have his blood on her fingers.
??: "Who dared to touch you?" They ask, but tiredness was slowly pulling her into her clutches.
'this is bad' though S/o knowing that if he passed out now there would be a great risk of never waking up again.
They look crazy like they wouldn't have done the same to her if given the chance.
??: "WHO?!"
She couldn't speak, her jaw was broken and her swollen tongue wouldn't allow it, so she just giggles softly, a bold, painful movement, the taste of iron running down her throat and faintly aware of the scarlet liquid running down her lips, it hurts. so much so that she wanted nothing more than to close her beautiful eyes and let herself be carried away by the temptation of the unconscious.
They seem to understand and look up, looking straight at the source of her pain, the ones who would gladly hurt her in the name of their god.
That person directly in his eyes and with all hatred spoke the following words
??: "I hope you're satisfied with your choice because now you're dead."
The choreography
That day in the Elder's office*
Luci: "S/o I've been talking to Mc and the others and we've come to a consensus..."
Luci: "We know that the exchange program aims to share knowledge and culture, aiming to create bonds of friendship between the species of the 3 kingdoms...'
Luci: ''....and I applaud your strength and determination to fulfill these requirements by creating bonds with demons outside our family..."
Luci:...however, we fear that these bonds can be used and that those who made them may have an ill-advised intention.
Luci:" That's why we kindly ask that you avoid contacting them constantly until we can understand their true goals."
Luci: "Understand..."
S/o with a blank stare*: "Yes''
--------------------------
Later in the house of mourning during a student council meeting, which S/o didn't attend thanks to the stars.
S/o had a video conversation with a mysterious person...
??: "So they forbade you to contact her?"
S/o :"Yes, I am"
?? *sighs:" How disappointing, just now that I managed to learn these moves."
S/o: "I already knew that this could happen, the members of this house are very territorial with theirs, in addition to their history with my ancestors it was clear that they were... uncomfortable."
S/o: "...that's why I took steps so that we can make that deal"
??: "Oh?"
S/o: "...I got the clothes and sent you your part this morning"
??: "So that's what was delivered?... I understand you and a well-prepared person, right?"
S/o: "yes, go get dressed so we can do this soon"
??Laughs*: "We are not prey, it seems that it is very anxious for that."
S/o Completely ignores it*:" The faster we do it, the faster I can regain my pride.''
*after dressing s/o put her DDD on a stand, dressed in twenties mafia outfits both sang and danced to Michael Jackson's Beat It.
The only witnesses were the ghosts and some little Ds who by oath could not tell anyone about that incident*
Happy Mother's Day Lucifer!
The best mother of all devildom!
No Way! He Must Love Me.
Obey Me? Obey Me: Nightbringer, yeah?
They (at the time of typing) got a new special card event called "Fun in the Sun" that's beach-themed. The special UR+ cards that you can get from it are of Satan and Beelzebub.
So of course, me being the Satan lover I am (hail my man), I had to get his card. It was a matter that required zero questioning on my part.
Now with my goal set, I had this whole plan on how I was going to be able to make sure I get him without spending money...yatta yatta...
But before any of that, I had to do the one free summon they give you whenever a new card event comes out.
And in my head, as I'm pressing the 'one-summon' button, I'm thinking, "There's no way you can get those special UR+ cards from the free summon right? They must program it so it's not possible..."
RIGHT?!
I was wrong...
HAIL SATAN BABY! WHO SAID THAT DEVIL WORSHIP GOT YOU NOWHERE?! NO ONE.
REMEMBER! THEY CAN'T TORTURE YOUR SOUL IF YOU WERE NEVER BORN WITH ONE TO BEGIN WITH!
So yeah, me and my bae Satan gonna go chill in 'the actually feline-infested kitty-kiddy pool', wrath and hunger y'all!
Master piece and thank you cosmicstarlatte
MC: Would any of you ever start a cult for me?
Satan: You're asking us,
Lucifer: The seven lords of hell,
Levi: If we would start a cult for you
MC:
Lucifer: Where do you think we go Tuesday nights
Yes yes they do they can also do the murder
Diavolo: Do you have representation?
Mammon: I call upon my lawyer MC!
MC: My client is innocent!
Diavolo (pinching MCs cheek): Of course he is, case dismissed!
Lucifer: Lord Diavolo there's crisp clean video of Mammon stealing from-
Diavolo (petting & cuddling MC): MC said he's not guilty, so he's not. What's so hard about that?
Lucifer: MC do you handle murder cases?
Diavolo: Do you have representation?
Mammon: I call upon my lawyer MC!
MC: My client is innocent!
Diavolo (pinching MCs cheek): Of course he is, case dismissed!
Lucifer: Lord Diavolo there's crisp clean video of Mammon stealing from-
Diavolo (petting & cuddling MC): MC said he's not guilty, so he's not. What's so hard about that?
Lucifer: MC do you handle murder cases?