Spy Kids - Tumblr Posts
I am completely convinced that the only reason that golden brain wanted to become human in the first place was because he wanted to be able to eat terreseas's (not sure if I spelled that right) blueberry muffins
We don’t talk enough about the fact that not only does Meghan Trainor have a kid but she’s also married to Juni from Spykids
I spent like 5 hours editing this gif frame by frame to make this shitty edit that I wanted to exist
Spy Kids 4 wasted a great character
Netflix released that stupid We Can Be Heroes but for Spy kids movie recently so I’m taking it as a chance to rant about how Spy Kids 4 (the really bad one with time puns) wasted the actually devastating character that is Danger D’Amo. Basically his backstory is that he was a kid in the 1920s whose dad worked on a time travel project. On the day of a test Danger (that might be an alias I don’t remember) runs in at an inappropriate time and gets hit by the machine. This causes him to be frozen in time, but still conscious of it. As he is frozen he watches his father try to free him, but died over time of natural causes. Eventually the OSS or whatever discover a way to release him after decades of being frozen and now he’s just a grown adult stuck as a kid with nothing to care about since everything he knows is gone. He then works to try and travel back to be able to live his life properly, but he fails every time. This causes the plot of the movie where time speeds up because he’s trying to travel back to be with his father. At the climax he gives an actually heartbreaking speech about just wanting more time with his father since his was so short (I wish I could put this more eloquently but you get the gist). At the end of the movie it finally works but he later comes back as an old man (the movie is ambiguous on what happened). He has grown wise and shuts down the Time Machine. Don’t take this to mean the movie is good, no the movie is a terrible, corporate, treats kids like idiots, cash grab. But some writer decided to go incredibly hard and create a character that’s genuinely heartbreaking.
131 - Spy Kids : All the Time in the World (2011)
He's really sick.
Based on this hard-hitting scene in Spy Kids 2
God I love that movie.
shoutouts to the movies that singlehandedly sculpted who i am today
bonus doodles:
I need a spy kids AU with Peter and Shuri
Spy kids AU with Peter and shuri
Found out yesterday there’s gonna be a new spy kids animated show on Netflix & I decided I needed to pay tribute to my childhood.
i still do not understand what possessed so many well-respected actors to do the spy kids movies like
did they pay really well? did you want these beautiful, terrible movies to be a blemish on your career forever?? why
antonio banderas did so many high-profile movies then in spy kids he looked like this
tony shalhoub has won multiple emmys but he did spy kids and
even fucking george clooney wtf
steve buscemi is pretty goofy but still
salma hayek’s pigtails in this wow
elijah wood was the lead in a movie that’s tied for the largest number of oscars of all time and he played a character creatively named “THE GUY”
sylvester stallone is like a cultural icon and he played not one but FOUR ridiculously dressed weirdos
alan cumming is the only one i can understand
Spy Kids 4 was Based as Hell
Nobody stop me I'm going on a Spy Kids 4 rant.
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Okay so the movie is hot trash in most of its senses but the bit where it shines has to be the 'villain'.
'Danger' literally goofed himself into being FROZEN IN TIME for DECADES because someone wasn't watching him. Great, right? Love OSS bs. But then his dad spends the rest of his natural life trying to break 'Danger' out of the time freeze, literally working himself to death in an attempt to do it.
'Danger' is conscious for all of it. 'Danger' - trapped in the mind of a child - has to watch his father give the rest of his life towards freeing him and fail. 'Danger' is released a decade or so later and his father is dead. Everyone he has ever known is dead. Or old as hell.
So he works for decades in return to get his life together and become head of the OSS. He finds a way to go back to his father and give his father closure and he jumps on it. He tries over and over and over and over to change his fate, to make things work, to reverse it, and it fails.
Then he's told to just enjoy what time he had left.
'Danger' goes back one more time. He sees his father, and he spends the rest of his father's life with him, making amends and everything else. He doesn't try to prolong anything, he doesn't try to break any fates. 'Danger' spends the time they have left, enjoys their shared time, and comes back aged, but content.
He won.
The 'villain' won.
It is deserved.
He undoubtedly goes to jail afterwards, as does all his clones. But 'Danger' got that closure, and no doubt spent the rest of his time just thankful for the chance to be there when his father passed.
He won.
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'Danger' D'amo is not a villain to me. 'Danger' is a tragic character fighting against destiny to try and fix the past, or delay his fate, only to realize that the way to 'fix' the past is to just... let it be. Stay with his father. Make sure his father knows the sacrifices were worth it, that 'Danger' grew up into just as much of a genius as his father. That everything he did was so his father could rest easy.
Every time I hear Spy Kids 4 slander, I honestly wonder if people have ever thought about the tragedy of 'Danger' and his entire life. If people looked past the terrible jokes and gags to see the emotional core at the centre of the movie. How both the heroes and the 'villains' learnt a simple lesson.
Enjoy the time you have.
It's a beautiful core to a movie with severe jagged edges. The geode rock from Barbie's Princess and the Pauper if you will. Hard and boring on the outside, beautiful and rich within.
Also the Ricky Gervais dog was not that horrible y'all just over-exaggerating frfr.