This Hurt - Tumblr Posts
So I’m sobbing !!!!
There was a moment, after Lucien volunteered to find Vassa, where he is left alone with Elain. No one, not even Feyre, knows what was said. And I can’t help but wonder if he said something along these lines:
“I see you are betrothed. Do you love him?”
“I do.”
“I loved someone once. When your heart belongs to them, there is nothing that can keep you apart. I wish you happiness, Lady.”
And when Elain takes a half step at the top of the stairs, perhaps it’s because she wants to know one thing—what kept Lucien from his love?
As Lucien goes to the continent, Elain gathers the courage to face Graysen. But when he rejects her, claiming it would never be her, it’s Lucien’s words that ring over and over in her head. Her heart belonged to Graysen, but his did not belong to her. She’s devastated because nothing should be keeping them apart.
And still Elain can hear Lucien’s heart. Beating and beating and beating.
But he does not hear hers.
This scene hurt me so much and I feel like I’m sure Omega wasn’t thrilled about it when all she wants is her brother back (he may be an ass to her but he’s proved he’s willing to save her too).
When crosshair saw the rest of the Batch pointing their weapons at him after he saved Omega and Azi.
They will never trust him again. What a brutal moment.
Modern Art
tasm!peter x reader
summary: inspired by Reckless by Madison Beer and All Too Well. Angst because all of us have a pain kink. requested by @buckyjbarneswhore | masterlist
Peter had fallen in love with you even before asking you out. It wasn't much of a surprise, that boy was always a hopeless romantic.
He loved the way you laughed, loved how he made you laugh. He loved how you hummed the songs he never understood, your voice, your kindness, how you doodled nonsense on his papers, how you hugged Aunt May whenever you saw her — he loved anything and everything about you.
Then one day, he went to Oscorp. You knew he saw something there, but he wasn't keen on saying what it was.
That was the first secret he hid from you.
You thought you were imagining things. Sure, he didn't spend much time with you anymore, but he was busy. You told yourself he was busy even though the two of you had the same classes and the same workload.
You ignored the feeling at the back of your head, the one that told you to be careful.
————
"Hey, we're going to a party tonight. Wanna come?" Aimee asked, smiling wide. "Trick question. You have to."
"Then I guess I'll be there." You returned a smile, knowing you didn't need much persuasion anyway. You didn't have much work and anything's better than sitting around doing nothing.
"I need to do a beer count. Is Peter going to be there?" she asked, taking out the little pink notebook she carried around. You had gifted it to her on her birthday and she hasn't parted with it since.
"He's uh, busy." You were suddenly interested in the book in front of you.
"Oh man, you're dating Peter Parker?" One of your other friends, Mark, looked up from whatever he was reading.
"Yeah, why?"
"No reason. He's a chill dude. Saw him yesterday. He bought me coffee at Helsey's after I was drunk off my ass," Mark said, laughing. "Owes me skateboard lessons too."
"Wait, wait," you sat up straighter. "Helsey's cafe is near your house."
"Of course it is."
"Your house is nowhere near the public library."
"Okay...?"
"Peter said he was at the library," you said, sounding worried. "He said he had a personal project or something."
"Why would he lie?" Aimee asked, closing the pink notebook.
"C'mon guys, you're overthinking this," Mark interrupted swiftly. "In fact, I'm pretty sure his friend mentioned something about going to the library too!"
"His friend? He was with someone?" you asked, trying to sound casual.
"Yeah, Gwen Stacy."
————
"I'm thinking we should go to that little restaurant they opened up?" Peter asked, handing over the flowers he had hurriedly bought on his way over. "Sort of as an apology for my absence the whole week?"
"I'm not feeling good. I'd rather stay inside," you said, hoping you sounded normal. You put the flowers in an empty vase and threw the bag into the bed, then opened your laptop.
Peter frowned. He had off days too, when he wanted nothing more than to disconnect from the entire world for a while, but your demeanor said something was wrong.
You running through whatever you're looking for on the laptop and ignoring your boyfriend standing awkwardly near the door was the closest thing you had done to giving him the cold shoulder.
"Are you mad at me?" he asked, sitting down on your bed.
You laughed forcefully. "Don't be ridiculous, Peter. Why would I be mad at you?"
"I mean, if you are- that's totally justified. I know I wasn't the most attentive guy last week. I blame it on my project—"
"Speaking of," you interrupted cheerfully, slamming the laptop shut and turning to him. "What's this project about?"
He was taken back. "Uhm, arachnology."
"Arachnology?"
"Yes?"
"That sounds like a question."
"I mean, yes. Definitely," he said, nodding. "I'm researching on arachnology. Why the sudden interest?"
"I feel bad for not knowing what's going on in your life." You replied, waving it off.
You had hoped he was a better liar, just so you could comfort yourself that it was all okay like your rose-colored glasses made it out to be. Apparently not.
"I appreciate that." Peter held your gaze, both of you knowing there was something more. Something he wasn't saying.
"Are you doing the research with Gwen Stacy?" The question had slipped off your mouth before you could think about it. He seemed even more surprised.
"Why would I study spiders with Gwen?" he laughed, not meeting your eyes.
The way her name fell from his lips said he knew her, and the affection behind it said he was fond of her. You bit down your lips and told yourself that you were being crazy. Friends care for each other, and you needn't worry about that.
If there was something going on, Peter's not the type to hide it. Then again, you thought he wasn't the type to lie at all, but isn't that what he just did?
————
The story wrote itself from there. So now here you are, alone at your birthday party, having everyone around you but him. You were pretty sure he had forgotten about it altogether.
When everyone left for home, you went to your room and swallowed the resentment. It felt like a statement on his part. He used to write little notes for you during class, with small lines that made you smile even though they were sappy. He said he'll never hurt you, but here you are, close to tears on your own birthday.
There was a knock on the window.
You didn't need to turn to know it was him.
"Hey, I got us pizzas!" he said energetically, then noticed your red gown, the slumped shoulders, the irregular breaths. "Y/N...?"
You turned around, wiping the first tear that had shamelessly slid down your face. The last thing you wanted to do was look broken in front of the man who broke you.
He took in your makeup, or rather the smudged edges of it. You looked so utterly strong yet cautious, as if you had just built a brick wall over your emotions.
"Oh!" he connected the dots, leaving the pizza on the bedside. "Your birthday- holy shit, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry—"
"Where were you?" you asked calmly.
He blanked. What was he supposed to say now? That he was so consumed with a bogus research that he forgot his girlfriend's birthday? Or the truth? Both would hurt the same.
"Gwen Stacy," you said the name slowly. "Why did you tell me you don't know her?"
He took a deep breath in. "I didn't say that. I just didn't tell you she was just doing the research with me—"
"If that was the case, why did you lie?"
"I thought you wouldn't understand! If I told you I had something super important to research with another girl, don't tell me you wouldn't have gotten jealous!"
"Bullshit, Parker!" your voice rose louder. "You know I'm not that type of overprotective partner. You know you could have just told me. But you didn't. Why?"
"There's a lot of compli—"
"Why?" The word ricocheted off the walls, making Peter almost take a step back.
"Did you cheat on me?" you whispered, biting down your lips so you wouldn't yell again.
"No," he shook his head far too quickly. Yet he looked guilty. You quickly connected the dots.
"Are you in love with her anyway?"
Peter's face fell. "I didn't plan to."
Tears freely started to fall now, but you didn't care. You took a deep breath in.
"You could have told me that from the start."
"I love her now but I loved you first," he said defensively. "I did. But then I was spending more time with Gwen and somewhere along the way, it just happened. I never wanted to hurt you, but would you really blame me for loving someone?"
"You're honestly asking me that?" you asked, your voice shaking. "All I did was love someone and where did that get me?"
"You don't understand—"
"What the fuck don't I understand?"
"I'm Spiderman!" He interrupted, raising his hands in surrender. He began rambling even without seeing your reaction. "Gwen works at Oscorp. She helped me. I knew you wouldn't have approved if I told you I was fighting for my life everyday. Not like she does."
You understood why he was saying that. Peter Parker was in his core, nothing if not kind. He didn't want to deal with how he hurt someone, so he threw a half-assed excuse at your face, hoping you'd agree and let him go. He didn't need your pain on his conscience so he resorted to wallowing through excuses.
Steady breaths, that's what he used to say when you were having a bad day. Steady breaths and a steady mind. Can't be all bad, right? I'm here. And I'm not going anywhere.
Despite everything, you smiled. Steady breaths it is.
"I knew you were Spiderman, I knew it from the start," you said, almost amused.
He blinked, surprised yet again. Maybe he was more stupid than he gave himself credit for. After all, you were his girlfriend. If there was someone in the world who figure it out, who else would it be if not you?
"You wouldn't have loved me anymore," he finished his ranting, desperately hopeless. "No matter what you say now, you wouldn't have!"
"I would have loved you any way you wanted me to."
He opened his mouth to say something, closed it again, realizing he had just run out of excuses. Nothing to give, nothing that you'll ever trust again.
"I'm sorry," he said, genuinely meaning it. "I'm so fucking sorry that I hurt you. You are a good person and—"
"Get out."
"Let me just-"
"Get the hell out!" you pointed to the window.
He didn't want to cause any more of a mess, so he did as you asked, though hesitant as ever.
And as he climbed that window down one last time, you looked at the vase in the corner, the one which had the flowers he bought for you; all of them completely wilted now.
————————
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marvel taglist: @magicalxdaydream @archangelaurii @vx-vexedvixen @junglxqueen @shyposttree @louderfortheback @garfieldssimp @/bex_tk1 @1999yanira @cinderellacauseshebroke @aleksanderwh0r3 @levylovegood @inu1gf @doodles-bi-tea @tenebrisirae @slutfortasmpeter @wrathspoet @deafeningnightcollection-things @awesomegirl85 @lazysheepperfection @disartrous @triumph-of-form-over-content @undergroundpersephone @thedelusionreaderbitch
andrew!peter: @angelcritterz @greekktragedyy @rophelia @littleredjason @geek-and-proud @arabellelancastersstuff @peachyplumsss @riibuns @lemonjane16 @ionlyeverwantedtobeyourequal @lokismidnight @blooo0ooop @plutoneu @livewittykid @melody-ed @dracoismydramaqueen @clean-and-claire @londonbrandcandy @jenoslov @luvwanda
oh so 😀😀
Thinking of Hiromi and how he feels about you.
It started with a nagging feeling in the back of his mind. The initial overwhelming feeling turned to hopefulness, the growing sensation of attraction that he couldn’t push away. Hiromi realized he had more than friendly feelings for you and knew it was best to tell you.
He didn’t find it necessary to hide it from you. You had a great rapport, and this naturally felt like the next best step.
Asking if you’d like to get coffee one afternoon, he told you with the notion of just getting it out. However, the reciprocation would be the cherry on top.
You’d gone through a breakup not long ago, and while you were interested in him, you didn’t want him to become your rebound while you healed.
Hiromi respected this and dialed back, letting you know he would continue to be your friend if you wanted him to be.
Hiromi isn’t pushy. He creates space between you two when you share you’ve been dating someone new and didn’t want to lead him on. If he’s hurt, he doesn’t show it. He still brings you coffee every morning and asks if you want to join him and his associate at lunch.
One day, you declined the offer as you’d be meeting your friend, and he accepted it with a nod. If he’s hurt, he hides it well.
“I don’t know if the feeling will ever go away.”
The night outside is silent, the only sound being the gentle water dripping from the faucet into the tub. Fully submerged in the lukewarm water, eyes staring fixedly on the wall in front of him.
Light from the window casts a faint glow over the room, creating shadows that dance across the wall and his tired expression.
“I can’t just bulldoze them. That’s not fair.” A wet hand brushes his stringy hair back; the cool air on his skin brings a slight hint of energy. “They’ve found someone. I need to move on.”
Your desk was missing something this morning. The plain coffee cup that usually sat at the corner of your desk wasn’t there. Your brow furrowed. “Hm. Maybe Hiromi isn't in today.”
Around lunchtime, a few people began to head out. Looking for Hiromi, you spot him and give a gentle wave. He nods, giving a slight wave, and walks out the door with his associate.
The week goes by, and you’ve missed the interaction. The kindness. Maybe he’s busier than usual.
“Hey!” You knock on his opened office door.
“Good afternoon. Did you need me for something?” His welcoming brown eyes create a flutter in your chest as you look into his, suit jacket in hand.
“Oh, well, yes, actually! Wanted to see if you’d like to get lunch with me.”
Hiromi gave a smile. The wrinkles in the corners of his eyes and how his lips curve radiate warmth.
“Thank you for offering, but I’m meeting someone. There she is now, actually.”
Turning, you see someone who's not from around the office. She embraced him gently, and he introduced her before they left his office with you in tow.
If you were hurt, it showed.
anne boonchuy + sad machine - porter robinson (2014) || on losing what you love. on finding yourself. on saving the world. on getting a second chance. on destiny. on choosing to live.
out here making me cry????? 😭😭
We were happy once - Jisung x reader
Sitting alone in your apartment, you have some realizations about your relationship with Jisung.
genre: angst, hurt/no comfort word count: 577 warnings: sad realizations, walking out, crying, it's just really angsty and sad!! based on the dialogue prompt "Our forever seems to have been short-lived." from @creativepromptsforwriting
You sat in the bedroom of your shared apartment with Jisung, your boyfriend. Well, you weren’t really sure anymore. Lately, the two of you had spent less and less time together, only really seeing each other a couple hours a day, if that. He spent all of this time in the studio with the other two members of 3racha, while you took more hours at work, just so you didn’t feel so alone in your apartment, waiting for him to come back home.
Looking down at the picture frame you held in your lap, which held a photo of the two of you, taken the day you moved into this apartment together. That was two years ago, but it felt much longer. You both looked so happy in it, not anything like the two of you were like these days. It was already almost midnight, and yet Jisung promised he’d be home hours ago. The dinner you had made, after being promised he’d be home for it, sat on the table, having gone cold long ago.
You couldn’t take much more of this, you had asked Han more times than you could count, to come home earlier so you could spend some time as a couple. He always promised he would, but like always, it never happened. Work was always the priority nowadays, never you. You couldn’t exactly blame him, Stray Kids was heading towards the peak, gaining more popularity every moment. But, you wished for once that he’d choose you over work.
Sitting here in this lonely place has made you realize you couldn’t do this anymore. You pull out some of your bags, packing the essentials into them, while only taking a few of the items that you and Han had collected during your relationship. A cute mug from a stop on his tour route that you visited him during, a couple photostrips, but not much else that represented your relationship.
Dragging yourself and your bags out to the living room, placing them down on the floor, you looked around, ingraining this image in your head, the last time you’d see this place, once filled with happy memories, now only filled your soul with dread. Finding a notepad on the table, you flipped through until you found a blank page. Writing a note to the man who had been the other half of your heart for so long, you felt yourself tear up as you wrote to him.
Signing the note at the bottom, you saw a tear drip down onto the page, next to your name. Letting out a silent sob before you straightened up, wiped away the remaining tears, and left the note sitting open on the coffee table. You grabbed your bags, slipping on a pair of sneakers, before leaving the apartment.
Han had only missed you by seconds, one elevator closing as the other opened. He had felt so bad for not realizing the time, that he rushed to enter the apartment. Shouting out for you, only to receive silence in return, made him confused. He wandered further into the space, noticing the eerie silence in what should be a slightly noisy apartment. He came into the living room, finding the open notebook. As he picked it up, he began to read it, sobs forcing their way out of his throat and tears rushing down his face as he read further.
“Jisung, my darling. Our forever seems to have been short-lived…”
Home | KNJ {M}
turns out, namjoon can’t keep his hands off his wife after all.
pairing: husband!namjoon x reader genre: smut, fluff words: 2.1k contains: domestic kink, apron kink, light pregnancy kink, counter fucking, light dirty talk, fingering, softness, possessiveness, love is arousing a/n: this was written for @btssmutclub‘s anniversary celebration drabbles! happy birthday to the club & bts! ♡ as always, feedback is very much appreciated!
Tonight, you don’t hear when your husband comes home; you feel him. You feel the delicate lips tracing the contours of your neck, brushing love in a gentle trail across your shoulder. You smile when his hands slide across your stomach to keep you close against his chest, for he can’t bear to be apart any longer. “Mmm…” Namjoon nuzzles his nose into your skin to inhale the scent he wishes he could bottle for the loneliest nights.
Keep reading
soulmate!renjun
summary: one morning in class, you started coughing up white chrysanthemum petals and they wouldn’t stop.
warning: just pure angst, blood mention, implied death, unrequited love. [1.8K words] [a playlist to listen to] [not exactly the hanahaki trope, but my spin on it]
you never believed in it.
from the stories you heard growing up or the news articles about how people would suddenly cough up flower petals
even when your grandparents spoke about it,, you didn’t know how to understand nor believe them
your grandma would always tell you the story of how she met your grandpa,, how she knew she had fallen for him when she woke up one morning puking up red rose petals
or how your mother began coughing up daffodils one morning and that’s how she found out that your father didn’t love her anymore
but you never wanted to fully believe that would ever happen to you
you were so young when it happened to your mother,, you believed it was a fragment of your imagination
something you had created with your wildest imagination,, because certainly humans could not cough up flower petals from their insides
but then one morning,, as you were sitting in your english class you felt a tickle in your throat and after clearing your throat you felt it
the soft petal sitting at the tip of your tongue,, and that’s when you began violently coughing up white chrysanthemum petals in the middle of class
Seguir leyendo
”You won’t stick around too long,sweetheart. Not when you find out what he’s really like.”
— Quill Kipps
Lucy: proceeds to not stick around because she did in fact find out what he’s really like (reckless with a death wish bound to get himself killed, especially if it means protecting her).
I had coney island by taylor swift in the background so... I will be crying in the corner for a few minutes.
sooner or later
Word count: 600
Summary: Maria comes home late again and R has started not to care anymore.
A/N: I’m realizing as I’m getting this ready to post that I didn’t really follow the prompt since it asked for comfort but I’d be willing to do a part 2 to this if that’s something you guys would like to see lmao so sorry. This was also way angstier bc i wanted to make it inspired by Last Kiss by Taylor Swift but decided against it :,)
Maria finished filing her paperwork and took a glance at her watch. 12:48 AM. You were going to kill her.
She stuffed her belongings in her bag and made her way to the parking garage as quickly as she could, hopping on her motorcycle and driving off to the apartment you shared.
Her mind was racing. You’d been giving her a hard time lately because of her work hours. You were right to, Maria thought. You deserved better, to have a girlfriend who was actually home and spent time with her. She grit her teeth and drove faster. Something needed to change. She couldn’t take the look of disappointment on your face whenever she arrived home late from work when you knew she wasn’t coming from a mission.
There were so many things she could blame. She’d often lose track of time while doing paperwork, she’d take on a larger workload than necessary, and she would always pick up slack from her coworkers. But you didn’t deserve excuses, you deserved for her to be there when you fell asleep, holding you close to her.
Upon entering the apartment, she found you sleeping on the couch under a blanket in a hoodie of hers. Maria could tell that you’d tried to wait up for her, the tv playing at a low volume, a drink sitting on the coffee table looking near empty.
She chewed the inside of her bottom lip guiltily as she turned off the tv and put the glass in the sink before leaning down to pick you up and take you to bed.
You stirred awake in her arms, nuzzling against her collarbone, “What time is it?”
Maria looked down at you, “1:09”. She felt you sigh against her.
Your silence made her uneasy. It was much worse than if you’d yelled at her. Silence meant you didn’t have the energy to fight for her to stay anymore. You were starting to accept Maria’s absence.
She was going to lose you sooner or later and it would be her own doing.
Maria set you down in bed and took a cold shower.
Though your eyes were closed and you were comfortably in bed, now that your girlfriend was home, you found it hard to fall back asleep without her beside you. As upset at her as you were, you missed her beside you. There were many moments the two of you used to share but you rarely spent any time together anymore.
You resented her for making you feel more like a roommate than her girlfriend. After one too many conversations about her work hours, you’d decided that if you didn’t see a change from her sometime very soon, you wouldn’t be her girlfriend any longer. You had just started to feel optimistic before tonight as she hadn’t stayed late for more than an hour and a half in the past week. You felt like an idiot for believing things would be different.
After her quick shower, Maria changed into sweats and got into bed next to you, looking down at you, seemingly asleep. She combed back the hair that was in your face and felt an uncomfortable tightness in her chest, “I’m sorry,” she whispered, sinking into the bed.
You turned onto your side to face her at that and threw your arm over her midsection. You didn’t answer her. It wasn’t okay, you wanted to tell her, but you didn’t. You were done fighting, and if she wanted to destroy your relationship by deciding that work was more important than you were time and time again, so be it.
Jensen actually managed to make destiel x76 times more tragic when he said that Dean didn't believe Cas could feel romantic love because angels aren't wired that way.
I mean.
Can you imagine season 4/5 Dean realizing he's attracted to a "monster"? That not only is Castiel not human, but also a man. How much John would have hated that and how many sleepless nights have Dean spent thinking about it?
Then he starts caring more and more about Cas,m until one day Dean realizes that it isn't just attraction or friendship that he's feeling. But how could it be anything else but unrequited? Angel don't feel that way, can't feel that way.
And Cas keeps dying and every time it feels like a part of Dean dies too, except it never comes back, even when Cas does.
Dean spends years burying his feelings, believing that it could never be shared or acted on, that Cas will never be able to love him back in the same way. Yet unable to seek a relationship with anyone else because he doesn't want anyone else. If all Cas can give him is friendship and devotion, Dean will take it. He'll take anything as long as Cas stays by his side (except he never really does, does he?)
Then Cas confesses and Dean is shocked, left gaping and unable to find words because he never believed he would get to talk about this. He has so many things to say and all those words are stuck in his throat. There are just so many of them that he's chocking on it all, unable to get anything out except Cas' name. And then he realizes it's his last chance to say them. That even if Cas loves him back, Dean will never get another chance to say it, to live it.
Cas throws him to the side and that's it, it's over, Cas is disappearing before his very eyes and he still doesn't know that he's loved, that he was always loved. Dean's mouth is opened all along around the words he can't bring himself to say, that he's hidden for so long that he can't find them fast enough.
Cas is gone and Dean's words turn into sobs.
Imagine seeing the person you despise most in the world and think they're genuinely the most awful, selfish and horrible being you've ever seen abandon their career for their loved one... and then see the person you love most in the world and think they're genuinely the kindest, most selfless and wonderful being you've ever known not do that for you.
Part 1 of a late b-day comic for shinsou! Enjoy!
