THIS IS FUNNY - Tumblr Posts
Lavender
Title: Lavender
Word Count: 5191
Summary: Hoseok gets exposed to perfume and he keeps sneezing the rest of the day (from a request).
A/N: I kinda wrote it with poly ot7 intentions but I’m pretty sure it can be read completely platonically too:) They’re just all very close and affectionate towards each other ha.
“I’m tired, Hob-ah,” Yoongi says, adjusting his hat to sit lower over his eyes. He pulls his face mask up just a little bit too, ensuring his face is completely hidden, barely-visible eyes narrowed as they scan the mall food court. “Let’s head home.”
Hoseok, who’s having a moment with his iced Americano, simply nods and starts to gather his things up. He slings his purse over his shoulder and pulls the brim of his baseball hat back around to face the front again, making a mess of his hair in the process.
“You need a haircut soon,” Yoongi notes, reaching over to tuck some of Hoseok’s hair behind his ear. He does the same on the other side, smiling as Hoseok continues to sip his coffee.
“I don’t know,” Hoseok replies after a moment, releasing the straw from his mouth long enough to lick his lips and turn his hat backwards again. “I’m kind of liking it longer.”
“It looks cute,” Yoongi says quickly, resisting the urge to fix Hoseok’s hair again. He looks cute with his hat backwards like that, too, but Yoongi keeps that part to himself. “I just meant maybe a trim around the ears. C’mon, let’s go. Did I mention I’m really fucking tired?”
“Mm hmm,” Hoseok replies, back to sipping his coffee. He and Yoongi stand and make their way through the mall, thankful that the crowds aren’t too bad today.
They’re passing by a perfume shop when Yoongi suddenly slows, his head turning sharply to the side.
“Shit,” he hisses, his arm shooting out across Hoseok’s chest to stop him from moving forward too. The impact makes a loud thump and Hoseok jumps, both in surprise at the abruptness of the action and at the pain it causes in his chest. He’s still reeling from the sudden stop when Yoongi curses again, then moves to stand right in front of him, his eyebrows furrowed as he faces Hoseok.
“What?” Hoseok asks, confused, but then Yoongi’s fist is twisting in the front of his shirt and he’s being nudged backwards.
A few seconds later it reaches him; the strong smell of lavender hits him like a slap in the face, filling his nose and lungs so quickly that he feels like he’s choking for a moment, breath stuttering out of his throat as the scent invades his sinuses. The effect is immediate. One second, he’s trying to figure out why Yoongi looks so angry and the next, he’s sneezing so hard it makes his throat sting.
“Hhh-hhh’ATCHSH! hatch’SHII! HACHSH! HTCHSH! hhh…ihh’HTCHSH’iii! HACHSH! Hhhh…”
Hoseok is breathless, panting heavily through his mouth by the time his body makes it through the first round of a whopping eleven sneezes. There’s a hand around his upper arm and he trusts that it’s Yoongi who’s guiding him through the mall, because he can’t see a damn thing through the tears streaming from his eyes. Every sneeze that rips through him threatens to toss him forward but Yoongi’s hand is firm, and so is the hand on his back that’s keeping him moving forward even as his brain screams at him to stop and focus on absolutely nothing else other than sneezing the irritant out.
“Hahh-tshch! hatch’SHII! HTCHSH!”
“Okay, oh–! Okay, you’re okay. Oh, fuck, Hob-ah. Okay. Shit.”
Yoongi’s starting to sound a little panicked, and Hoseok can feel his own heart thumping wildly in his chest. It joins the tight, itchy feeling that’s in his lungs and his throat and his nose, the feeling that he only gets when he gets anywhere near anything lavender scented. Sometimes, even thinking about lavender can set him off, get his eyes itching and his sinuses prickling, and the sneezing– fuck, the sneezing that comes with it makes everything feel so maddeningly itchy that he can hardly stand it.
Once they’re back at the car, Yoongi opens the passenger side door and helps Hoseok into the seat. He leans in after and opens the glove box, and Hoseok pinches his nose shut while he rifles through it in search of something– if he sneezes now, it’s going all over Yoongi with how close he is.
“Shit…really? I just…oh thank fuck.” Yoongi mutters and curses to himself until he finally gets his hands on what he’s looking for, which is a handful of fast food napkins. He turns his head and holds out the napkins, but frowns when he sees Hoseok pinching his nose, eyes closed and mouth open, panting heavily.
“Oh,” Yoongi says softly, quickly pulling back until he’s not leaning in front of Hoseok anymore. “Sorry.”
Hoseok cracks one eye open to make sure he has enough clearance before letting loose with the next round of sneezes, aimed at his lap and then belatedly at the fast food napkins Yoongi quickly shoves into one of his hands.
“HACHSH! hhh’ATCHSH! hatch’SHII! HTCHSH!”
As he sneezes, he can feel Yoongi take the hat off his head, and then his fingers are running through his long hair in a gesture that’s both comforting and grounding as he grows more and more lightheaded with each sneeze.
“Fuck,” he hears Yoongi curse again. He pushes more of Hoseok’s hair back from his face and Hoseok knows if he could open his eyes long enough in between sneezes, he’d see a very, very worried man looking at him.
“I’m…hhh…I-I’m okay-ehhh…” He barely manages to get the words out, breath hitching erratically.
Yoongi buckles him in and then closes the door, jogging around to the driver’s side after so he can drive them both home. By the time they get back, Hoseok feels like a puffy, stuffy mess.
“HACHSH!”
He sneezes loudly as Yoongi guides him into the house.
“Hahh-tshch!”
He sneezes again as Yoongi guides him to the kitchen, where he’s deposited in a chair while Yoongi wets a dishcloth under the sink.
“Hihhh…hih! Hih– hhh! Hihh’HTCHSH’iii!”
“Bless you,” Namjoon says, rounding the corner, but Yoongi holds up a hand and watches Hoseok sneeze twice more.
“Might want to save it,” Yoongi advises with a frown.
Hoseok nods in agreement, then holds up a finger, blinking rapidly as he looks back and forth between them both. Then he sucks in a frantic, desperate gasp of air before pitching forward with a string of sneezes so long he can feel Yoongi tensing up next to him as he keeps going.
“HACHSH! hhh’ATCHSH! hatch’SHII! HTCHSH! Hih– hhh! hatch’SHUH!”
Hoseok is vaguely aware of Namjoon inching closer to him after each sneeze, until he finally closes the gap and grabs him gently by the shoulder to keep him from falling out of his chair.
“Oh, wow,” Namjoon murmurs. “Oh no.”
“That’s the last time I go to the shopping mall,” Hoseok spits out in between two more sneezes, his voice croaky. He most definitely is going to lose his voice before the end of the day with the rate he’s sneezing at. The sneezing fit finally ends with one horribly messy expulsion, aimed into the wad of napkins Hoseok has been clutching in his fist since Yoongi shoved them into his hands in the car.
“Hhh-hhh’ATCHSH!”
“Will you fetch some tissues, please?” Yoongi asks Namjoon as Hoseok attempts to mop up the aftermath.
Namjoon hurries out of the kitchen and returns less than a minute later with tissues, Seokjin following close on his heels.
“What’s going on?” Seokjin asks, grabbing a chair and pulling it right next to Hoseok’s chair so he can sit as close as possible as he starts to look over the younger man, hands roaming over his whole body like he’s checking for physical injuries. “Joon-ah said you’ve been sneezing up a storm in here. What did you get into, hmm?”
Hoseok just sniffles while Seokjin takes his chin in his hand and turns his head back and forth, inspecting the redness around his nostrils and the puffiness around his watery eyes.
“Lavender?” Seokjin guesses, and Hoseok nods miserably.
“We’re gonna need antihistamines,” Yoongi says, and Seokjin jumps up.
“I’ll go grab some.”
When Seokjin comes back into the kitchen, he brings both the antihistamines and a very curious-looking Jungkook with him.
“Hobi-hyung is having an allergy attack?” Jungkook asks aloud to the room in general. He zeroes in on Hoseok, who has to squeeze his eyes closed as another intense tickle prickles inside his nose.
“HACHSH! HTCHSH! hhh…ihh’HTCHSH’iii! HACHSH! hatch’SHII!”
“Ohh. Oh wow. Bless you, hyung. Bless– bless you!” Jungkook gasps as Hoseok sneezes and sneezes and sneezes some more.
Hoseok hears Namjoon chuckle beside him and he glances up at Jungkook to see him staring down at him, big eyes widened in shock.
“Bless you!” Jungkook says again after a couple of more sneezes. “Geez, hyung. You’re sneezy. Oh, bless you. What’s…bless you…what’s going on?”
Now, Jungkook’s expression has morphed into one of concern, and he shuffles closer, hovering over Hoseok like he’s about to climb into his lap.
“Perfume,” Hoseok croaks out. He reaches up to squeeze Jungkook’s shoulder, about to reassure him he’s okay, but he can already feel the next round of sneezes coming on. “Lavender perfume,” he chokes out, and then he’s sneezing again, face tucked into the crook of his elbow. His hand is still on Jungkook’s shoulder, and he feels Jungkook cover it with his own hand, his fingers stroking softly over the skin on his knuckles.
“How exactly did you come in contact with lavender perfume?” Seokjin asks. He picks up the wet cloth from where it’s now sitting on the table and waits for Hoseok to get a break between sneezes before cupping his face with one hand and gently pressing the cloth around his eyes.
“The fucking mall,” Yoongi spits out as he tips a dose of antihistamines into his palm. “Apparently it’s lavender week. They had banners and everything.”
Hoseok lets go of Jungkook’s shoulder, leaning into the cool, wet cloth for a moment before pulling away with a thick sniffle. He takes the pills from Yoongi, but he’s barely able to swallow them down before he’s rushing to pull out a fresh handful of tissues from the box.
“Hihh’HTCHSH’iii! Hahh-tshch! hatch’SHII! Hhh-ATCHSH!”
“Bless you. Ahh, hyung, you’re sneezing so– bless you. I’ve never heard you sneeze so much!”
Jungkook picks up the antihistamines from the table as he talks, turning it over to inspect the back with a frown.
“Damnit,” Namjoon curses as his phone starts to ring in his pocket. He looks at the screen, checking the time and silencing his phone with a frown. “It’s time for Seokjin-hyung and I to leave for work. We have a meeting in a half hour.”
Upon hearing this, Jungkook tosses the box of antihistamines back onto the table and latches onto Seokjin like a koala. “Bye, hyung. Have a fun meeting.”
He waits until Seokjin ruffles his hair and presses a quick kiss to his temple before he lets go and moves to Namjoon next, wrapping his arms tightly around the older man’s shoulders from behind. “Bye, hyung. Have a fun…Ooh, you smell good.”
Namjoon laughs when Jungkook gets distracted partway through, pressing his nose to the back of Namjoon’s neck and sniffing deeply.
“Thanks, Kook.”
“I can’t smell anything,” Hoseok says sadly in between sneezes.
“We should stay,” Namjoon frowns, watching Hoseok sneeze. “I’m not going to be able to concentrate at the meeting when Hobi is here at home suffering like this.”
Seokjin nods in agreement, mouth twisting down to one side, but Hoseok sniffles and shakes his head frantically.
“Please go.” Hoseok sniffles, sneezes again, and then clears his throat. “This is so embarrassing,” he groans.
“We’ll take good care of him,” Jungkook reassures, letting go of Namjoon and moving back over to Hoseok. He steals Seokjin’s chair when he stands and scoots somehow even closer to Hoseok than Seokjin had been, reaching over to rub his back and nudging the tissue box closer to the sniffly man.
“You’re sweet,” Hoseok chuckles stuffily, leaning over so he can rest his head on Jungkook’s shoulder. “See?” He squints through puffy eyes at Namjoon and Seokjin. “Go to your meeting. I’m in good hands with Jungkookie and Yoongi-hyung.”
Seokjin and Namjoon exchange a look with each other. Clearly, they’re not very happy about leaving when Hoseok is still doing so poorly, but at the same time they know that the others will take as good of care of him as they would. After a moment, Namjoon nods, making their decision known even without having said it out loud. He and Seokjin each plant a kiss on the top of Hoseok’s head before they leave, and then on Jungkook’s head when he stares expectantly at them with wide eyes. Yoongi waves them off when they tease him about wanting a kiss on the head too, but Seokjin sneaks one in lightning-fast anyway, ruffling his hair afterwards before skipping out the door after Namjoon.
“C’mon,” Yoongi says after they leave, tugging Hoseok up. “Lets go rest on the couch.”
Jungkook disappears down the hall as Yoongi gets Hoseok settled in the living room. He gets a fresh cool cloth and places it over Hoseok’s eyes, then sets him up with the tissues and some soft music.
“Thanks,” Hoseok says with a long, congested sigh that catches in his lungs. “Htch’shii!” The sneeze is small and tired-sounding, almost like an aftershock from the allergic fit from before, but his head still bobs forward and the cloth falls from his eyes and lands in his lap with a plop.
Yoongi sits on the coffee table facing Hoseok and reaches out to gently cup the side of his face, his thumb swiping across his cheek to catch a few stray tears. “Are these tears from the perfume?”
Hoseok nods. “Yeah. My eyes won’t stop watering,” he answers, voice thick with the congestion. “And I just can’t…I c-can’t st-ahh…”
Yoongi frowns as Hoseok trails off, unable to finish his sentence as he gears up for yet another round of sneezing.
“Oh, Hob-ah,” Yoongi sighs sympathetically. His hands move to Hoseok’s hair, his go-to move for comforting him, and he pushes all the loose strands back from his face, tucking them behind Hoseok’s ears after every few sneezes.
“Ughhhh,” Hoseok moans congestedly when he finally catches a break, slumping back against the couch. Yoongi keeps one hand moving through his hair and uses the other to pluck a tissue out from the box and hand it over. Hoseok closes his puffy eyes, blows his nose, and then lets Yoongi take the used tissue and tuck another one into his grip without looking. They repeat the process a few times, Hoseok too exhausted to open his eyes as he blows his nose.
Jimin, Taehyung and Jungkook appear a few minutes later, arms full of all kinds of shit that make Yoongi raise his eyebrows in suspicion– especially Taehyung, who hangs back a little, hands hidden behind him.
“Bless you, hyung,” Taehyung says when Hoseok greets the maknaes with a tired smile and four itchy-sounding sneezes. “Jungkookie told us you had a bad time at the mall.”
“Our poor sunshine-hyung,” Jimin coos as he plops down onto the couch next to Hoseok, cuddling up against his side and reaching up to smooth his hair back from his face when Yoongi pulls his hand away. He keeps his fingers moving through Hoseok’s hair even when he scrunches up his red nose, cups a hand over his mouth, and sneezes tiredly, his head bobbing forward just slightly. “Our sneezy sunshine-hyung,” Jimin amends with a giggle.
“Hobi-hyung, we brought some stuff,” Jungkook announces vaguely. He has a blanket tucked over one arm and mug in his other hand. He sets both down on the coffee table and settles on Hoseok’s other side, reaching into the pocket of his hoodie to pull out a small box. He sets that on the table too, and Yoongi sees that it’s Jungkook’s own allergy medication that he takes on days when the pollen count is especially high.
“He’s not due for more medicine for another couple of hours,” Yoongi says. “He just took some.”
“I know, but I brought the good stuff for later. No offense, Yoongi-hyung, but this will work way better than what you gave him.”
“I’ll take a double dose, I don’t care,” Hoseok murmurs, leaning into Jimin’s touch.
“No,” Jimin and Yoongi reply in unison, and Jungkook frowns defensively.
“I’ll give him the good stuff later. When he’s due for it,” he promises.
Taehyung clears his throat. “Yoongi-hyung, are you gonna hang out with us? Or…you could go get some work done, if you need to. We can keep Hobi-hyung company.”
Yoongi narrows his eyes, looking between the three younger men.
“I can take a hint,” he says after a moment. “Guess you’re in good enough company for now,” Yoongi says to Hoseok, standing up from his spot. He leans down and kisses Hoseok’s forehead, then looks between the three maknaes again. “Come get me if you need anything.”
As soon as Yoongi disappears down the hallway, Taehyung shuffles forward, arms still behind his back. He brings them forward and Hoseok sees that he’s holding a sealed box of tissues.
“No way!” Jungkook nearly shouts, and Taehyung slaps a hand over his mouth.
“Shh! I stole these from Yoongi-hyung’s room,” Taehyung whispers. “He thinks I don’t know he keeps these hidden from us, but I do.”
“Wait,” Jimin says, leaning forward. “Those are the good tissues. The soft, lotion-y ones.”
“Yep,” Taehyung says proudly, offering the box out to Hoseok.
“How did you know where those were hidden?” Jungkook asks. He helps Hoseok open the box, and Hoseok is able to grab a tissue out just in time for a couple of sneezes.
“HTCHSH’iii! HIIISH-uh!”
“Bless you, hyung” Jungkook says, snuggling back up against Hoseok’s side.
“I know because I’ve used them before,” Taehyung explains. “One time…well, let's just say I accidentally snorted some pepper– don’t ask me how, I know it sounds dumb,” he says. “Anyway, Yoongi-hyung let me use them because I was sneezing so loud and he thought I was gonna sneeze my brains out. He felt guilty because he was kind of the one who left the pepper on…wait– nevermind– pretend I didn’t tell you that part.”
“I’m sorry, what?” Jimin asks incredulously.
Jungkook, already laughing, says, “How does that even happen? How do you ‘accidentally’ snort pepper? What was Yoongi-hyung doing with the pepper?”
Taehyung looks down the hallway nervously, hunching down a little and lowering his voice again. “Stop asking questions! Please just forget I said any of that. Don’t tell Yoongi-hyung I told you any of that,” he warns. “The point is, these will feel so much better on your nose, Hobi-hyung. Trust me!”
“You do need something gentler,” Jimin says, reaching out to rub the tissue that’s sticking out the new box with his fingertips. “Ooh, these are soft.”
“Yeah,” Jungkook says, leaning in close to Hoseok’s face. “Your nose is so red already. Oh, that looks awful, hyung. Do you want me to go get my nose balm?”
“You have a nose balm?” Jimin asks, at the same time that Taehyung says, “What the fuck is a nose balm?”
“It’s exactly what it sounds like,” Jungkook replies, rolling his eyes. “It’s for here.” He taps his fingers under his own nose, then brushes them over his nostrils in demonstration, scrunching up his face when the action is a little too ticklish for his sensitive nose. It makes his nostrils flare widely and Jimin laughs and reaches over to bat his hand away.
“You’re too sensitive, Kookie, stop tickling yourself,” he says. “We already have one sneezy person in this household.”
Hoseok flushes red and sniffs hard, scrubbing a finger under his nose. “Ugh, I don’t want to be the sneezy one in this household,” he groans.
“It’s okay, though, hyung. We don’t mind that you’re sneezy. And it seems like it’s getting a little better now, right?”
Jimin snuggles back up to Hoseok and motions for the blanket, which Taehyung hands him. He tucks it around Hoseok’s shoulders, then pats the couch next to him for Taehyung to join him. Taehyung plasters himself to Jimin’s side with a happy hum.
“Yeah, a little,” Hoseok agrees. “I don’t know if I can cuddle right now,” he says sadly, sounding somehow even more congested. “I think I’m just gonna keep sneezing for a bit longer.”
“That’s okay, hyung,” Jungkook tells him. “We don’t mind sneezy cuddles. If you don’t mind, that is. We’ll keep you company and try to distract you until it’s time for the good meds!”
Hoseok is so desperate for relief that he ends up letting Jungkook talk him into taking the ‘good meds’ a little early; the good meds, apparently, are Jungkook’s go-to meds specifically because they knock him out even when he’s having a bad allergy attack. Hoseok finds himself almost dizzy with the sudden drowsiness just minutes after taking them. He can’t keep his eyes open for more than a few seconds by the time they’re fully in his system.
Just before he drifts off, he feels a maddening tickle creeping up from somewhere near the back of his throat, climbing up through his sinuses and spreading throughout his nose so quickly it makes him gasp. The tickle is quick to make him sneeze, but it comes out pathetic and small, blocked by how stuffy his nose is and how sleepy his body is. As soon as he sneezes, he’s nodding off, tucked in the warm embrace of his blanket and Jimin’s arm around his shoulder, Taehyung blessing him softly on one side of him and Jungkook petting his hair from the other side.
Hoseok falls asleep snoring and wakes up so congested he almost forgets he can breathe through his mouth, and the momentary panic makes him flail around wildly for a good second before he remembers to suck in a lungful of air, coughing immediately on the exhale. He’s still wrapped up in the blanket but the maknaes are gone. His entire face feels puffy and his nose feels stuffy and his throat is so dry it hurts.
He can hear voices in the kitchen, six of them, and he feels himself relax listening to them. He closes his eyes and starts to doze off again, but then he sniffles a little and it makes him need to sneeze.
“Hhh! Hihhh…hh-hh-hihhh! Hnghh…”
The sneeze toys with him, inching close to the edge before backing away, and Hoseok is left gasping and sniffling, runny-nosed and frustrated without the relief of an actual sneeze. He sniffs tentatively again, and the tickle returns sharply, making him blink rapidly and scramble for a handful of tissues.
“Hhgh-PTCH’shuh!”
The resulting sneeze is explosive and incredibly unsatisfying, but it’s also messy and the couple of tissues he’s holding are destroyed instantly. He blindly reaches for more tissues and cringes in disgust. When he’s done cleaning himself up, he blinks slowly a few times and then looks up to see Namjoon standing above him, holding out another tissue with a worried look on his face.
“That perfume really fucked you up, huh?” He asks softly.
“I hate lave’der,” Hoseok groans miserably, accepting the tissue as his breath hitches desperately in anticipation of another sneeze. “Huhhh…hh-hhh–! Hihh! Hihh’ihhh-uh–! Uh! Ugh, fugck!”
Feeling like he could cry in frustration, Hoseok digs a fist into his itchy eyes and lets himself pout dramatically.
Namjoon catches his wrist and gently tugs his hand away. “Don’t rub, you’ll make it worse.”
“Fugck. How ca’d it get worse?”
Namjoon sighs and cups the back of Hoseok’s neck, giving a gentle squeeze as he shoots Hoseok an apologetic look. “Yeah, I guess it really can’t. Do you feel up to eating something? It’s dinner time.”
Hoseok squints at the clock on the wall, but his eyes are too swollen and watery to really see it. “How lo’g was I asleep?”
“A couple of hours,” Namjoon confirms after checking his watch. “I’m surprised you even fell asleep with how sneezy you were earlier.”
“Ju’gkook gave bme the good stuff, appar-uhhh…hhh! Hih-ihh-uhh! Appare’t…hhh…hihhh–!”
Namjoon’s hand stills on the back of his neck. He gasps, his breath hitching erratically, but the sneezes doesn’t come out and he sighs loudly, unsatisfied.
“Fugck. Bme.”
Namjoon hums in amusement and hands him another tissue so he can blow his nose, and then he coaxes him up off the couch. He grabs the box of tissues to take to the table with him, tucking it under his arm as he shuffles behind Namjoon into the kitchen.
As soon as he sits at the table, Seokjin gives him a big glass of water and he gulps the entire thing down in seconds. Then, Yoongi is placing a bowl of hot, steaming soup in front of him, and Hoseok just leans over it for a moment, breathing in the steam and wishing he could smell it.
“I made yours mild. I didn’t want the spices to irritate your sinuses further,” Yoongi says. “Should feel nice on your throat, too.”
Hoseok nods gratefully and picks up his spoon.
“Ahh” Taehyung gripes, sniffling frantically in between spoonfuls. “Why didn’t you give me the mild version too? This is so spicy.”
Hoseok chuckles and pushes his box of tissues across the table toward Taehyung, who’s dabbing his sleeve under his streaming nose as he grumbles some more about the spice.
By the time he’s done eating, Hoseok’s congestion has cleared a little, but the sensation of having to sneeze has returned full force. He barely has time to ask for the tissues back from Taehyung before his breath is hitching, his eyes squeezing shut on their own. He turns partially away in his seat, grabbing a tissue from the box in preparation, but after a moment of waiting the sneeze doesn’t come.
When he turns back to the table, everyone is looking at him.
“Still feeling sneezy, hyung?” Taehyung asks, eyebrows drawn together.
Hoseok nods. “Yeah, ki’da. It wond’t combe out.”
Jungkook frowns deeply. “Oh, hyung, you sound so stuffy. Are you sure you don’t want…”
Whatever Jungkook says next, Hoseok can’t hear him. All he can focus on is the fact that he still has to sneeze, and his body is starting to sneeze, but then nothing comes of it. It happens twice in a row, his breath hitching wildly and his mouth opening and closing like a fish, but then he’s left looking like a fool when no sneeze comes out.
“C’mon,” Seokjin says eventually, hooking his arm through Hoseok’s elbow. “Let’s get you to bed. We’ll get the regular antihistamines,” he shoots Jungkook a look, “and a cool cloth for your eyes.”
Hoseok lets Seokjin guide him down the hallway, and he’s only a little surprised when they pass by all of the other bedrooms and head straight for the big bedroom at the end of the hallway. Technically, it’s Seokjin and Namjoon’s room, but it’s where they all end up more often than not. He’s happy to be tucked right into the middle of the big bed while Seokjin fusses over him, applying a cool compress to his eyes and pulling the comforter up to his chin before he settles next to him and starts combing his fingers through his hair.
“I’m never letting you go to the mall again,” Seokjin says, a protective edge to his tone. “You can stay inside the house and we’ll bring you everything you could ever need.”
Hoseok barks out a laugh at that, imagining himself stuck inside of the house for the rest of his life, forbidden to leave lest he come into contact with an allergen.
“Sounds awful,” he says.
Soon, the others join them in the bed after washing up and changing into pajamas. It’s early, far too early to actually go to bed, but Namjoon turns on some quiet music and Taehyung and Jimin take turns telling jokes to keep Hoseok’s mind off his predicament.
“Ohgod,” Hoseok suddenly gasps, lifting his head from the pillow. “No, not a-again…hhh…”
Jungkook, who’s lying to his right, puts a comforting hand on his chest. “It’s okay, hyung,” he whispers. “Just take a deep breath, okay?”
Hoseok does, and as his chest expands, Jungkook starts to rub circles over his shirt.
“Lie your head back down,” Jungkook instructs, his other hand coming up to brush Hoseok’s hair back from his forehead. “Close your eyes and just keep breathing as evenly as you can. Try to relax.”
Even though everything in Hoseok’s body is screaming at him to tense up, he tries to do as Jungkook says, letting himself relax on his back. He takes a deep breath through his mouth, and then another, and as he breathes he focuses on the intense, growing tickle in his nose. At first, he thinks it’s going to be just that, a tickle and nothing else, but then it starts to spread in an itchy, almost burning way that he recognizes as the beginnings of an actual sneeze.
“Hihhh…huh’ihhh…hh-hh–! Hhh–! Hhh-uh’HTCHSH’iii! HACHSH! Hhh-ATCHSH!”
Hoseok can’t help the loud moan he makes after he’s done sneezing, his eyes rolling up in relief as he finally, finally gets the last itch out of his sinuses with three big sneezes.
“Fucking finally,” he huffs, not caring that he hears six different laughs in surround sound as he swipes a finger under his nose.
“Aw, bless you, hyung,” Taehyung coos through his giggles. “That sounded like you really needed that, huh?”
“When did Jungkook become the sneeze whisper?” Jimin teases, passing Hoseok a tissue.
“I’ve had lots of practice with sneezes that won’t come out,” Jungkook replies with a small frown. “It’s so frustrating. It happens to me a lot.”
“Yeah, it does happen to you a lot,” Yoongi notes, bringing his hand up to squeeze Jungkook’s shoulder. “I always feel so bad for you when it happens.”
“Poor Jungkookie loses at least one sneeze every day,” Namjoon adds. “Makes sense that he knows how to deal with it.”
“Yeah, like I said. Sneeze whisperer,” Jimin chuckles.
“He’s a cute sneeze whisperer, though,” Taehyung smirks.
“I don’t know what’s cuter– Jungkook sneezing, or Jungkook’s face after he loses a sneeze.” Seokjin grins at Jungkook. “He’s just so cute either way.”
“Yeah,” Yoongi agrees. “He is particularly cute when he sneezes.”
Jungkook squirms, his face flushing pink. “Stop,” he whines softly, burying his face into his pillow.
“Hey,” Taehyung whispers suddenly, and when they all glance over at him, he nods in Hoseok’s direction.
When they look at Hoseok, they see that he’s sound asleep, lips parted slightly as he breathes through his mouth, the air whistling slightly through his nose on each exhale.
Namjoon turns off the music, and they all cuddle closer together, cooing fondly at Hoseok when he snuffles in his sleep and rolls onto his side, one hand coming up to grab a fistful of Seokjin’s shirt as he snuggles against the older man.
“Good night, Hob-ah,” Seokjin whispers, pressing a kiss to Hoseok’s forehead and smiling down at him. “Rest well.”
found this userbox on my friend's blog and it is beautiful
please rb with an image id so i can add it in!
yall know bears can be fem right. like you don’t have to be a waifish twink to be gay and gender nonconforming right.
adding to the danny phantom meme verse
Tim and damian please
what are they teaching kids
Ha ha ha anyone else just ever not have the motivation to even do their breathing excersises or coping skills while they’re crying/freaking out and then feel awful, because if you really wanted to feel better, then you would Take care of yourself and do the work instead of being a lazy shit? Anyone? Okay, just me (cause none of y’all are lazy shits, have a great day :))
✨ SHE'S SO PERFECT I LOVE HER SO MUCH NOBODY DESERVES HER✨
I'm postings it again, sorry, life hits hard
𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘺 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘢 𝘤𝘳𝘶𝘴𝘩 𝘰𝘯 𝘺𝘰𝘶;; 𝘱𝘢𝘳𝘵 𝘰𝘯𝘦
[ 🌸 ] uchiha version
characters: itachi uchiha; obito uchiha; madara uchiha; sasuke uchiha; shisui uchiha
genre: fluff
warnings: none, fem!reader
- - -
- - -
- - -
itachi uchiha
*cute boy *against all odds, his interest in you did not begin at the academy. *actually, you and him weren't even in the same class, lmao- it all started on a mission. *he didn't even turn to look at you when the hokage told him that you would be on his team lie, he did- he even turned to look at you twice
*things got a little crazy in the mission, and suddenly your team was surrounded by enemy ninjas. Quickly, four of your group members were injured, and itachi was starting to wear out. He had really forgotten about you
*and it is just at that moment that you manage to reach him after putting your injured companions in a safe place
*my boy let out the air that he had been holding after he realized that you were fine and that he was not alone in this, haha
*after the fight and reaching Konoha successfully, and after checking that the injured were okay and giving the report to the hokage he approached you
A quiet, yet soft voice spoke to you from behind you, "… I wanted to thank you for earlier"
*you smiled tenderly at his grateful words, assuring him that there was nothing to be thankful for
*obviously, you weren't aware of the little jump that Itachi's heart gave when he saw your pretty smile.
*the poor kid froze before mentally beating himself up to compose himself.
*just as you were leaving, he stopped you
“…would you like to go out some day?”
"huh?"
*although several months have passed, he will never admit his attraction to you, at least not for now.
*but you can rest easy… It won't take that long until Shisui or his mother encourage him to court you when they realize that he is feeling things for his pretty teammate.
"What's wrong? Is the whiz boy afraid of a pretty girl?" //proceeds to poke him in succession with his finger// “huh? huh? huh-?”
“Shisui… you have 5 seconds to run, and two have already passed”
- - -
obito uchiha
*obito swore that he would not fall in love again after what happened with rin *but it happens that nothing goes as he wants *especially after you walked through that door of the akatsuki hideout with your stupid and pretty smile *he found himself looking for you after that meeting under the pretext that he didn't trust you for being the new girl lying boy, he just wanted to see your smile *on the other hand you were beginning to feel harassed by the awkward boy with the orange mask *your partner and his friend-rival realized that
"but senpaaaaaaaaai-"
"tobi stop pestering!"
"but tobi just want to see how the new girl is doing!"
"i swear to God and everything beautiful in this world-!"
"…can I turn him into a puppet?"
"guys…"
*they pretend that they are not interested if something happens to you, or that tobi does something to you they are a couple of liars
*but you can be sure of something- obito will never tell you who he is
*although if you want something with him, you will have to go for it, girl.
*he won't accept how he feels about you unless you make him see it, lmao
*although he will protect you feverishly even if both of you are not something
*imagine that you are on a mission with Tobi, and suddenly you come across something that could put you in danger
*oh yeah, just ignores tobi's mood swing and strange aura while he deals with the bad guys
*don't worry, he will be your shadow, although you will never know it.
- - -
madara uchiha
*this intimidating man is a joke, pfff- don't look at me like that
*the man is a 10/10 when it comes to talking about politics
*but he's a 0/10 when it comes to confronting you, lmao
*you're not even from his clan to begin with, and his father only taught him to woo women from his clan, not outside women from the uchiha clan tend to expect certain behaviors when expecting to be courted
*anyway
*he started to fall in love when he saw your pretty eyes when you looked directly at him without any fear or shame
*he's not going to lie; it made him nervous
*because since his sharingan woke up, no woman dared to look him in the eye in the same way that you did, oh
*you make his stomach feel light and his mind spin
*and don't make me start with his face, which looks flushed and the fact that it feels very hot
*the man thinks you're some kind of magician or something, lmao
*because, my God, how is this event possible?
*The great madara uchiha in love? What a lie
*anyway
*do you have patience? good, you will need it to wait for the man to gain confidence
*because he may be confident and headstrong when it comes to the battlefield, but he's a cinnamon bun who doesn't know how to pose for the audience when it comes to the dreaded ✨romance✨
“come on, big brother… you can do it!”
"wait…- no izuna!"
"hey Y/N, my brother wants to ask you something!"
"izuna-!"
*God, please help him
- - -
sasuke uchiha
*a disaster
*a complete disaster
*he can handle hate, you know?
*but he can't handle these beautiful emotions and sensations, oww
*make his stomach flutter and his legs shake unnaturally
*he's already a teenager, he thinks… he's too mature for this, he thinks!
*poor guy
*if he only knew
*anyway
*try to avoid you
*like, if you're on his "renamed team every chapter" he'll just ignore your existence
*He won't be rude, though!
*it will be more like a "good morning" in the morning and a "good night" at night, and that's it
*those will be your only interactions 💀
*ah, but don't let him see you in danger, he'll run to where you are without hesitation, pfff
*in the end, everything stops thanks to the intervention of Suigetsu and Jugo who couldn't stand the two of them
*somehow they manage to make sasuke bring up his feelings for you
*so they decide to help him at the end of the day with motivating words
"you just have to talk to her"
//jūgo nods//
"you shouldn't be afraid of her, she won't bite you"
//jūgo nods//
"don't tell me that the great sasuke uchiha is afraid of a girl-"
"…suigetsu shut up"
//jūgo nods again he can't decide who to support//
*in the end, he's just a soft guy who doesn't know what to do at the end of the day
- - -
shisui uchiha
*you were his cousin's classmate, and somehow you managed to be friends with itachi
*and one day he finally met you
*shisui takes everything with humor, you know?
*he is a fun person who likes to enjoy little things
*like, he's the guy who's always in a good mood
*but when you're around him, his mind goes blank
*his funniest jokes suddenly forget, or he doesn't know how to explain them from one moment to another, and suddenly they are not funny anymore, they are embarrassing 💀 even itachi makes a subtle grimace on his stupid stoic face that he charges whenever he opens his mouth to deliver a “joke”
*he doesn't know what to do or how to react
*and for some reason, he stutters a lot when he tries to explain his joke again
*itachi is there luckily to comfort him at the end of the day, but: "no, itachi- don't give me love advice when you haven't even had a girlfriend!"
*somehow he will overcome this historic moment in his life and be able to woo you properly
*when? Uhh… someday, I don't know, I'm not psychic-
"You just have to talk to her-"
“You say that like it's easy, itachi!"
- chapter 30, Words of Radiance
BAAHAHAHAHAHA!! 😂
Jihoon, trying to record a video: Hi, I’m Jihoon
Soonyoung: …I’m Soonyoung
Jihoon: …maybe a little quicker on that Soon.
Soonyoung: Okay.
Jihoon: Hi, I’m Ji-
Soonyoung: I’m Soonyoung!
Jihoon: …
Soonyoung: *laughing*
Jihoon: *sigh* …Hi, I’m J-
Soonyoung: I’m Soonyoung.
Jihoon: Hi, I’m-
Soonyoung: SOONYOUNG
Jihoon: Soon, please. Can you just say your name like a normal human being??
Jihoon: Hi, I’m Jihoon.
Soonyoung: *inhuman noise*
Seungcheol, behind the camera: *laughing hysterically*
Jihoon: Okay, one last time!
Jihoon: Hi, I’m Seungcheol-…FUCK
pls tell me someone else has seen this😳
Hi! We're introducing Important Blue Internet Checkmarks here on Tumblr. They're a steal at $7.99—that's cheaper than some other places, when you consider that you get not one but TWO checkmarks for your blog. Why, you ask? Why not? Nothing matters! ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Get yours here!
I'm dead. LMAO.🤣🤣🤣 And also think. the animators had to animate that facial expression. Run Sofia! 🤣
Run for your life Sofia
Based on this post from @stopmeibegyou that had me had to make a drawing for this AU for James and Snape
What’s the difference between Brazil and the USA?
About 1500 arrests within 48 hours of an attempted coup.
Geralt: “steel sword is for humans, silver one is for monsters.”
Jaskier: “And his flesh one is for me”
Geralt, pinching the bridge of his nose: “Jask, for fucks sake”
you’ve been blessed by a rare double spinmetal sighting, seen only once every 222 years
reblog in the next 10 seconds for good luck
ignore and your rng will suck for all of eternity
Melina and the Lord of Frenzy. They are everything to me
why did my neighbors name their wifi network this
