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Actually I love the two throuples in Sense8 because one is Kala in love with her husband Rajan but also kinda cheating on him emotionally (and then sexually) with her boyfriend Wolfgang that she's mentally linked with and then when Rajan finally meets his wife's boyfriend his reaction is

And then Lito,Hernando and Dani doing this

welcome to the club

when all you have is a hammer, everything looks like a nail. when all you have is a paintbrush, everything looks like a canvas. when all you have is a cock, everything looks like the exhaust pipe of a 2014 honda civic. so yes, to answer your question, i am stuck. please call the emergency services

I give children extra lessons to get some money while in Uni, and that causes some conversations that truly amaze me.

Like the third grader today that told me he frequently has nightmares.

Me: Maybe take a toy, like a knight or a superhero, and put them next to your bed so they can protect you. Kid: I have multiple Jedi. Me: Perfect! They can protect you. Kid: No they can't. Me: They're Jedi. Kid: Yeah but I dream of huge monsters Me: They're Jedi, they can handle that. Kid: No, like the Zillo Beast! That big!

(Honestly, that caught me off guard. I did not expect him to go this specific on me. So i raised my nerd up to meet him)

Me: But the Zillo Beast was sad and just wanted to get out. Kid: Yeah, but i also dream of *violently describes Planet-Ending catastrophe* the Jedi can't do that

(Honestly, he had me at that point. He has a very accurate power scaling of the Jedi. And I can't really go "but they are *Jedi*" at him anymore, he's gonna think i am either making fun of him or mentally stunted. So pulled up the strongest Star Wars Entity i know.)

Me: Did you see the episode about the Mortis Gods? Kid: No.

At that point i gave up. Two minutes later he was happily chatting with another kid. Sometimes small humans confuse me. As I am typing this out, he is supposed to do a worksheet. He is suddently talking with the other child about reasons for war and why that happens. He seems deeply disillusioned with humanity. Either clone wars did a really good job raising him or we should be scared of an eight year old.

Continuing that conversation was also very entertaining

Being in fandom and trying to get your friends interested is so fun, especially when you (and your friends) are a bit unhinged.

Being in fandom and trying to get your friends interested is so fun, especially when you (and your friends) are a bit unhinged.

Regularly, Tim and Steph sit on the floor somewhere, looking at each other until one of them says "what even is your thought process" and then they just start laughing uncontrollably

He gets six crows tattooed, in detail, one a bit larger, two a bit smaller, and every crow has a little trinket in their hands. A knife, a gun, a stick of dynamite, a bone, a tiny wolf, a cane.

At first he only wanted to get five, his crows, but Inej convinced him to add his own crow to make it complete.

He finds a liking to tattoos and slowly gets more. When his relationship with Inej gets more formal, he gets her first knife surrounded by geraniums.

After a politically motivated attack on Wylan and Jesper he is reminded of how important they (and the other crows) are to him. He gets another crow, made of a pattern, with all their initials in it. It is placed over his heart.

When he reaches the point to not need his gloves anymore, he gets a small version of them tattooed on his wrists near the pulse point. When he gets panicked, he touches them to ground himself.

He gets the crow skull from his cane tattooed on his bad leg.

When he and Inej get their first kid, he gets the start of a little flower garden. A geranium with Inejs name hidden in the lines, one for himself (without a name) and one for the child, with the name. Every child gets added on. One day he falls asleep while Jes and Wylan are over, and they guerilla-add themselves and their kids. Kaz pretends not to love that when he wakes up and definetly does not get small flowers for them added at his next appointment.

Jesper tries for years to have him get a stack of Kruge. He doesn't succeed.

One marriage anniversary, Wylan gifts them a painting of something resembling a sigil, encorporating his story and Inejs and small nods to their kids. When Kaz subtly asks for a simplified version to get tattooed, Wylan cries.

When Inej gets her ship tattooed where the menagerie symbol was for so long, he consideres getting it too. He decides against it, lets her story be hers only. Instead he gets a reapers barge on his ankle, with small nods to the family he lost so early. He includes his own child self on the barge and then puts a crow feather a bit further up his leg to show what he became.

He keeps all his tattooes where they can be covered up and never shows them to strangers. Only his loved ones know them, some are only known to Inej. Because they are a way he shows love, that he values people so much he wants them to be with him everywhere and forever.

And when all the crows get a wolf and a tulip tattooed on the tenth anniversary of matthias' death, he grumbles, but cannot hide the glistening in his eyes when they retell stories and stand in Wylas backyard, the tulips not in their hands but their skin, thinking of the crow that has been lost.

One of my personal favorite Kaz headcanons is that he gets a tattoo for every person he cares about. Obviously he already has the R on his arm, so maybe like six crows for the other crows and then something specific for Inej, like a knife or geranium. And then if they ever had kids, something for each of them, and just. That's it. He gets tattoos for everybody and it's just super sweet.

In the manor, the tupperware is color coded. The seats are color coded. The cups are color coded. Everything is.

However, the batkids have recently discovered they can just dye stuff and claim it as theirs. It does not end well.

Any piece of media that doesn’t give Batman a Robin has misunderstood the character to a shocking degree. And not because Robin keeps Batman from going too dark or anything like that, but because Batman is fundamentally about parenthood. It started with an orphan, with the loss of parents. It’s always always always been about that.

I think at some level, Batman is trying to protect Gotham City in the same way a parent protects their child, and Robin is the physical embodiment of that. Batman is the kind of parent that says I will defend you, I will save you from danger, I will hurt whatever hurts you. Batman isn’t about a fear of bats. Batman is about the loss of parents. Bruce lost his parents to a violent criminal, so he will protect his city from criminals of the same nature, and when he sees a little boy with no one, he will step into the gap because he can’t bear not to. He knows that pain, and he will be damned if he lets this child feel it too.

Batman is a guardian and a father and a scared little boy all wrapped up in a black cape and a growl, and by his side there is another scared little boy who isn’t so scared with the Bat next to him, and together they’re going to make all of Gotham a little less scared too. That’s the core of Batman- he was an orphan once, and he will not let his city be left alone in the dark. And sometimes that’s planting a fist in the face of a mugger, and sometimes it’s holding the hand of a little boy in traffic light colors, but either way it’s Batman saying don’t be scared, I will protect you, I’m here.

Batman is a father. And I wish more media understood that.

What Batman Rogue do you think you would vibe with?

For me, its gotta be either Harley (i am a mentally ill bisexual woman, do i need to explain more?) or the riddler. I love riddles so much and could honestly get lost in them. I can fully see myself running into riddler when i am running late for something (adhd much?) and just going "hey dude i really wanna solve this but i also need to get to my appointment or my anxiety will kill me so can i come back later? Can i have an appointment with you too? Can we do this as a weekly thing? I really like riddles but i really have to go"

So I was thinking about the batmobile earlier and how they use it on patrol.

Wayne Manor and therefore the Batcave are pretty much on the edge of town and the bats use the batmobile/their other vehicles like bikes to get into the city.

Now when they are there, they move mostly by grapple or parcour. Which makes sense, you wouldn't really beat up a goon, get in the batmobile, drive three blocks and park it again. I assume they park it somewhere and then go on patrol.

A standard patrol is most likely circular, so they end up back at the batmobile. But what if they have to chase someone? Or something happens that draws them to the other side of the city? What if one of them gets injured and they need to be transported? The batmobile is parked somewhere, so what happens now?

I imagine the following possibilities:

1. The batmobile has self-driving capabilities. I can't really tell how good that would work in Gotham, and i don't know how that would work for the bikes.

2. There is a bat on batmobile-duty. They spend the patrol night chilling, watching tiktoks, reading a book etc. and just wait for a pickup.

3. There is a remote driving system, probably accessed by Oracle as well as the batcave. In the necessary moments Oracle grabs a controller and GTAs the Batmobile to the location.

4. There are Batmobiles hidden throughout Gotham and after such an incident happened, a few batkids need to go for a drive and pick up/drop off the various batmobiles at their spots.

I don't know which one is the most likely, and all of them have so much Batfam Chaos potential. Maybe all of them are true. Allow me to present some of these chaotic scenarios.

Red Robin, severly sleep deprived: *nearly hits a lamp post*

Batmobile: *avoids the post, speeds up* *steering wheel moves under his fingers*

RR: What?

Oracle, via comms: for the love of god just take a nap I'm taking you home

Nightwing, after a chase: great, now i need to walk like 5 kilometers to the car.

Red Hood: There is a batmobile in a garage like two streets down

NW: what?

RH: don't you have a map?

NW: a map of what?

RH: of the batmobiles

NW: what- no. No i do not. I will be having words with someone.

Batman, after patrol: There are still two bikes and a batmobile on the streets. Go pick them up.

Red Hood: alright, which one of you idiots is allowed to drive?

Nightwing: Damian put your hand down.

Gothamite: *crosses the street* *nearly gets run over by batmobile* *stares to see it driving off without a driver*

Phone: *beeps*

Text message: very sorry, still working on the self-driving. Have a coffee on me, heres a coupon code for batburger. -O

Red Hood: *peacefully reading a book, legs on the batmobile dashboard, a thermos of tea in the cupholder*

Oracle, via comms: Hood, Spoiler has been injured, i am sending you the adress for pickup.

Hood: How bad is it?

Oracle: Not life-threatening. She wanted to go on but Batman refused.

Hood: so she can wait a bit more.

Oracle: what?

Hood: They are about to have the big love confession and i am not waiting on that because B is overprotective.

Oracle: I just googled your book. Pick up Spoiler now or I will make you listen to Spoilers for the entire series.

Hood, starting the car: Jesus O no need for warcrimes

(I am fairly new in this fandom, if there is something in canon that i missed/got wrong please correct me)

headcannon that after Superman overheard nightwing saying that he was justice and Batman's lovechild with his super-hearing when he was talking to someone, he took a page out of Batman's book and now everyone knows that he says "I am justice" when he's defeating villains or saving people

i do love the idea of the wayne kids giving bernard shovel talks about taking care of tim and all that but also give me batfam who are just as protective of bernard as they are of each other.

give me bernard, attending his first wayne gala as tim's significant other. having a suit custom tailored and funded by bruce even if bernard insists it's not necessary because he already has one. arriving at the gala anxious because of course he is, it's a goddamn socialite event, but being protected from every side by the wayne kids even when tim is dragged away.

Socialite: Oh, and who might you be?

Bernard: Oh, um, hi. I'm Bernard Dowd, nice to meet you.

Socialite: Dowd? I've never heard of your family before. Who...?

Bernard: I'm not here with my family, miss, I'm here with my boyfriend.

Socialite: ... Boyfriend?

Bernard: Yeah, I'm here with Tim.

Socialite, frowning: Tim... as in Drake-Wayne? He has a boyfriend?

Dick, coming up next to Bernard: He sure does! Bernard here is practically one of ours now, aren't you? He matters to Timmy, so he matters to us.

Bernard: Dick—

Dick: C'mon, let's get you back to Timmy. Farewell, Mrs!

Bernard: I could've handled that.

Dick: All the rules that apply to my siblings during galas apply to you too. I'm sure you could've, but you shouldn't have to. I've got your back too, now, yeah?

Bernard: ... Yeah. Thanks, Dick.

Jason, coming up to Bernard at the bar: Not to freak you out, kid, but there's a guy starin' at ya from the other side of the bar. Y'know him or should I encourage him to look away?

Bernard, startled: Huh? (looks around) Oh. No, I don't know him. Why... is he looking at me like that, actually?

Jason, scowling: 'S just how the slimy fuckers at these events are. Can't keep their eyes off anything that's small, young or pretty. Disgusting. I'll deal with him— where's your annoying other half gone, inferior blondie?

Bernard: Tim? He got pulled away for quote; 'something important' by some lady. He said he'll meet me here after he's done, so I've been waiting.

Jason: Huh. If I see him I'll point him yer way. Hey, don't be 'fraid to ask any of us questions or for help if ya need it. We know the best how daunting this shit can be.

Bernard, genuinely touched: ... Thanks, Jason.

Jason: Yeah, yeah. Don't tell Timmers I said that, though, he'll call me a loser.

Bernard, laughing: I won't.

Bernard, being talked to by several people at once and a bit overwhelmed by the attention: Uh— I'm—

Damian, stepping between him and the socialites: Dowd. I require your assistance.

Bernard: Um— hi, Damian— with what?

Damian: You will see when we get there. Follow me, Drake's more tolerable half.

Bernard: Okay... so what do you need from me?

Damian: Nothing. You seemed to dislike the attention from all of the nosy adults over there. It was the most efficient way of extracting you from the situation.

Bernard: Oh. Thanks, Damian.

Damian: Tt, don't thank me yet, Dowd. I am still criticising your choice in romantic partners.

Bernard: Didn't you threaten me with a katana to not dampen Tim's mood in any way shape or form?

Damian: Slander. I said quote 'if you make Drake more annoying by breaking his heart I'm going to maim you.' I don't see how you got the message you did from that.

Bernard, grinning: Sure, Damian. Sure.

Wylan: How.

Jesper: I propose stupid ideas to Kaz for fun. What do you think i can do with proper arguments?

Wylan overworking himself with council meetings and paperwork, forgetting to eat some meals somedays but keeps insisting to Jesper he's fine until he just passes out one day out of exhaustion.

Jesper promptly orders him to stay in bed once he wakes up and his only job right now is to relax. He then goes to the council meetings himself and proceeds to strike three deals in favor for them in the span of one day that the council has been arguing about for weeks

despite being older, dick and jason are 1000% the immature ones when it comes to bantering with villains.

like while they're all out fighting crime, Barbara's monitoring their progress, and on one side it's these young, high-pitched voices spouting sophisticated shit like, "while I do admire your unwavering consistency, it does beg the question: do you truly derive any semblance of pleasure from incessantly facing defeat at my hand?"

and then on the other hand, you just hear these two grown-ass men who are like, "FUCK YOU, BITCH, I HOPE YOU GET RUN OVER BY A TRUCK AND THEN RUN OVER BY ANOTHER TRUCK, SUCK MY DICK YOU DUMBASS PRICK, ALSO WANNA KNOW WHAT ME AND YOUR MOTHER DID LAST NIGHT ?I?"

(they say if you're very quiet, you'll hear a sigh of disappointment from the shadows while this is happening)

Somehow Dick manages to actually lock Tim up in Arkham after Bruce “dies,” and it results in the longest period of no breakouts in Gotham history.

Don’t misunderstand. Tim’s not like standing at this revolving door of a prison entrance intimidating people into staying. He’s just being he’s weird self. He’s not Robin anymore after all, Damian took that mantle, but he’s still Timothy Drake and if you think this little twink of a boy with too much Information on everyone and to many random ass skill sets is not the most entertaining thing to show up in those halls then you are wrong.

Dude walks in with a suitcase half his size and wearing a pair of shades that cost more than the building housing him. He has a cell to himself that’s??? Fully furnished what the fuck? How did he get a laptop in here?

Someone approaches him in the canteen thinking they could extort or threaten him and Tim reflexively flips and pins them to the ground. He then sits in the guy and starts telling his captive audience about a cold case from 87 that he’s absolutely positive would be solved already if the police were competent in collecting evidence but also holy shit the uncle was so obviously guilty I can’t believe he somehow managed to get away with it.

Tim and Dent regularly hold mock trials. They’re not serious. Someone from the audience usually comes up with some random scenario and the two argue over it and site sources they have memorized and they go back and forth until there’s a vote by a preselected Jury.

Somehow Tim and Riddler started a “Pun-off.” That roped in like….half of the inmates. They had to cool it after someone got stabbed for a particularly bad pun though.

PowerPoint nights were implemented and the therapist thought it was a great idea because it allowed the patience an outlet for their obsessions. Most showed up because Tim was a bottomless well of cold case information and obscure conspiracy theories. This man has shown up every night with a new PowerPoint to present. No one talks about the number of note takers when he was presenting the PowerPoint on cloning.

People start showing up to group therapy on the off chance they’re in a group with Tim because there is something entertaining about listening to him dramatically wax poetic about how if he’d “ever felt the true touch of his mother’s love then he likely wouldn’t have spiraled down mentally when all his closest friends died so close together.

Once, Tim wanted Alaskan Crab so he ordered it and had enough shipped in for all the inmates and the staff. Hired a private chef to come in and cook it all too.

Meanwhile, in one on one therapy, Tim kinda just laughs with his appointed therapists about everything that’s going on. Talking about his friends does help, and playing up his intelligent eccentric billionaire is cathartic in a way Tim’s never really expected. “How sad is it that I’ve had more fun around these people than I have with my own family?” He asked one day.

Dick shows up one day to check on his baby brother because all he hears from Arkham is “Tim’s doing great!” Also he’s trying to check up on why there haven’t been any breakouts recently. When he’s brought to Tim’s cell he’s super confused. Again, this is a fully furnished Cell and Tim’s “smuggled” in a super computer essentially and what looked like a very expensive bed. There’s a shelf of books and a number of other electronics and oh? Are those WI financial records? Is Tim still running the company out of Arkham?

Anyway, Dick is checking in and Tim beams at him. “Dude, you basically sent me on Sabbatical! No fighting, no Damian or Jason! I don’t have to submit patrol reports. I’m not always bruised up from fights. No Damian or Jason! And when my fellow inmates aren’t being psychotic they’re entertaining as shit! I’m having more fun here than I have had in the last decade.”

And Dick doesn’t really know how to handle this, especially when Tim slips him a tablet and says. “By the way, I called in a favor with Slade (or other mercenary of your choice) since that Bitch owes me for that one stunt in the Caribbean, and had him check out some locations I thought Bruce might have left clues. Turns out I was right. Our cruddy father was in fact not dead and lost in the Time Stream. This tablet has everything you need to bring him back assuming you don’t think I’m still losing my sanity, which by the way, I’ve seen future selves where my sanity was lost and you better pray that never happens. Apparently the world burns. Killed that version of me already though, it’s somewhere in the YJ archives along with Gun Batman, Joker Batman, and Demon Head Tim. That last one is still possible though.”

“There’s at least two ninja’s here who have been tasked with keeping an eye on me on Ra’s behest. Wouldn’t put it past that man to abduct and try to brainwash me, but also if he tried Dent and Riddle would team up and systematically tear his organization a part to get me back. Apparently I’ve brought in enough intellectual stimulation and  entertainment that if anything happened to me they would ‘kill everyone involved and then Themselves.’ Their words not mine. I mean, I haven’t seen hide more tail of the Joker and wouldn’t be surprised if someone shot him dead in his cell to keep him from ruining our fun.” It was Tim actually. Figured he’d give patricide a go since all of his father/father figures keep dying. Figured he’d let Joker Junior complete the set.

“Anyway. Go save Bruce. When’s he’s back, tel him to come pick me up. Ask him if he’s proud that I’m following in his footsteps. Oooh tell him they stuck me in his old room I bet he’d love that!”

Dick end up leaving wondering if he somehow made a problem worse.

A month later Bruce shows up in a suit. Tim is drinking something out of a pineapple, sitting around a table with Dent, Nigma, and Harley playing a game of poker. Tim looks up, smiles, and asks if he wants to be delt in. Bruce sighs heavily but pulls up a chai, nods at the the other’s at the table and lets his son deal him into the game.

Somehow, Bruce is still surprised every time he learns that Tim is the most like him out of all his children.

Do you think Kaz would pull the “I didn’t know Wylan was the boss of you” on Jesper when he tells Kaz he can’t go and commit felonies with him today cause the husband said no?

So beside University i work a few hours a week for a company giving extra classes to struggling students. i have groups up to six kids who work on their own stuff and i am basically there to give them exercises, help when needed and make sure everyone stays quiet and working. In good courses that means i have a lot of time just sitting around with the company laptop, so i spend a lot of paid time browsing the internet (i am paid minimum wage, they treat yoiu like a contractor so you can't get promoted or get a raise, not a lot of incentive to be extra productive).

So i spend my time on the internet, glancing up at my students every once in a while and keeping my pokerface. Where am i hanging out? This beautiful hellsite (i am typing this on work time, best example); stupid games (if these laptops wouldn't get reset so often i would have HIGH scores in wordle) or, my favorite, ao3.

which leads me to my newest discovery. today i tried to open up the site to - well, you're on tumblr, you know what people do on a03 - and was treated to a sterile white page informing me that the website i was trying to open was blocked on this network.

i never had problems before accessing the site from here so i investigated and found a small explanation below.

This website was blocked due to the floowing categories: Tasteless

I wish i was kidding.

So now i am blocked from my emotional support copyright infringement and left to ponder very important questions:

Does my work use a contracted internet filter? If so, who would call a web filter company to complain about ao3? And doesn't that have to get verified?

Or, if they don't, who at my work knows about ao3? And why would they block it?

And, for all the somewhat understandable reasons ao3 might be a good idea to block in an environment where children might have access, why put it in the category "tasteless"?

I see you, and I raise you neurodivergent wesper conversations confusing the crows:

Jesper: Wy, can you give me the- the thing?

Wylan: Which one?

Jes: The one that does like- stuff

Wy: Oh, yeah, sure

Wy: Just gimme the thing so i can get it

Jes: absolutely

Kaz & Inej: *flabbergasted confusion*

Jesper: “You know…”

Wylan: “…yes?”

Jesper: “No, like… you know… like…”

Wylan: “Do I know… what?”

Jesper: “Huh?”

Wylan: “Are you having a stroke right now??”

jason: i think we should get a divorce

steph: what are you doing?

jason: just practicing

steph: why are you already planning your hypothetical divorce?

jason: i don't know. i'm getting old, i think i'm having a mid-life crisis

steph: you don't even have a girlfriend

jason: hypothetically divorce me

steph: okay, then i'm hypothetically taking half your assets

jason: well, you didn't sign the hypothetical prenup

jason, to duke: it's called a prenup, right?

duke: yeah, it's a prenup, and you DID hypothetically sign one

steph: who the fuck is this guy?

duke: i'm his hypothetical lawyer in this divorce case

steph: well, then, i'm taking the hypothetical kids

steph, to tim: right? we can get those, right?

tim: yes, we can definitely get the hypothetical kids, don't worry about it

jason: who the fuck is this hypothetical fucking idiot? a hella fucking nerd idiot

tim: wow, that is a lot of hypothetical insults. i need to keep these on for continuity because i look like the other lawyer

steph: this is MY hypothetical lawyer, and we have been hypothetically sleeping with each other

jason: how could you hypothetically do this to me?!

steph: because you hypothetically are an alcoholic!

oh god

Europawahl 2024 moodboard

Some German tumblr blogs for German learners

Here's a short list of German tumblr blogs that post German stuff and memes and other funny things, for anyone who wants to get an insight into German tumblr and what's going on in Germany:

@thatswhywelovegermany

@inoffizielles-deutschland

@useless-germanyfacts

@official-german-translationen

@official-german-puns

@deutscheszeug

@deutsche-bahn

@germanshitposting

@official-german-medienlandschaft

And here's some hashtags you could follow to see more posts from German tumblr:

#deutsches zeug, #deutscher tumblr #deutschland #deutsch lernen #german memes, #deutscher blog, #deutsche bahn