Headcanons Jujutsu Kaisen (+ GN! Reader)

Headcanons Jujutsu Kaisen (+ GN! Reader)

Main plot : you're scrolling on Instagram and you don't pay attention to your own S/O and they don't like it.

Nobara Kugisaki

Why not starting with a female character? (maybe the only one present here, sorry)

Kugisaki doesn't notice at first that your attention is completely taken by the screen in front of your eyes.

It doesn't really matter to her since she would do the same if she had her own under the condition that you would have to take her within your arms or somewhere comfortable.

Yes, she doesn't have any since she dropped it and she often requests yours to know what happens or anything else.

But, she is only genuinely curious about what you seek on social media such as Instagram, or what are the accounts getting your attention.

Yet, you don't move. Not even from an inch. As if she wasn't here, next to you, almost trying to climb your lap so as to have a sufficient view about your likings on Instagram.

Eventually, she would try to rob your phone to judge you, kindly or not, and play with you with her mischievous grin and probably helped by Gojou or Yuuji.

It's only when you are forced to get up from your couch and you run after the fools who thought they could rob your phone so easily without the fear to be punished.

Eventually, she gives back your phone and stops playing. You move to YouTube and watch some cats video or anything else to calm Kugisaki's insane mind you loved so much.

Itadori Yuuji

You were nicely settled on the couch of Jujutsu Tech and everything was going to be okay.

Lying on the furniture, scrolling down on the feed of Instagram with a lot of cats because Yuuji likes them and those little cuties invaded the posts you were usually liking instead.

Yuuji noticed you, chilling between two deadly missions and he couldn't help himself to see how you were.

Though, he doesn't get the same reaction as usual. It concerns him slightly. Did he do something wrong?

He's quickly panicking which exasperates Sukuna who calls him "silly" internally.

Your boyfriend adopts the "puppy boy technique". He tries to attract your attention by being cuter than he is always. You could have sworn you saw a tail wagging behing his back. His clinginess rises and you find yourself trapped under your boyfriend's weigh while you are just reading some short texts on your screen.

"What are you doing Yuuji?" you asked, trying to get your boyfriend on another position because it was much harder to breath with him and his whole body applying a pressure on each of your bones even though he is adorable as hell.

As a response, the boy has the sole delusional words"notice me senpai" written all over his face.

You don't get a clear answer but you understand what he means. You change your position and call Yuuji to come next to you to watch what you were doing until now.

Eventually, he got sleepy and takes a nap against you whole you pat him gently. Although, he is visibly happy so you don't disturb his rest while Sukuna talks with you.

Ryomen Sukuna

Why did you do something so reckless?

Sukuna is the one who is the least accustomed to technologies and he is rather possessive.

He woke up from a slumber that lasted thousand years so such devices as your phone, PC, whatever, were quite the discovery at first.

You had fun trying to explain what you were able to do with that stuff. Or not. Because the king of curses being the king of curses, nothing is simple with him.

Yet, right now, Sukuna didn't get the attention he wanted from you and reacts quite harshly. He wants your eyes on him every second of every day. Don't lie in that couch and pretend as if he didn't exist at all, it will make him agressive.

He stares at you with empty eyes at first.

He noticed you weren't going to come near him to talk or anything else. When Sukuna takes control of Yuuji's body he is way more silent. He could've have accepted such an excuse, as stupid as it sounded because you're a little human after all. Weak, slow-minded.

Now he was upset. He made his aura become more oppressive. As if chains were joining your neck and remove air from your ribcage. He also considered to attract within his domain but it wasn't a good idea. Yuuji might be present there and the king didn't need to involve a stupid ass such as his vessel.

It wasn't enough to make you move. Yeah, you had some Gojou vibes inside of you.

Then, a wild thought starts to cling within Sukuna's mind. What if you're tired of him? What if you want to get rid of him and uses the card of ignorance to get what you want? Actually, he has been rather harsh this morning and snapped at you things he didn't mean.

No. That's not possible. You can't get tired of him. He's so perfect despite the fact he has to share a body with Yuuji. He scrutinizes himself in a mirror, there's no blur in the reflect.

Long ago, everyone would have killed to be with him, licking his feet if needed. And YOU were in your couch, ignoring HIM. Did you have a death wish or something?

Eventually, Sukuna might think as much as he wanted, he didn't get to come to you. The answer might be not the one he didn't want at all. And, he didn't want either to say that you didn't like him anymore. You made him feel alive and free while you were spending time together. Things he didn't have anymore since he came back to life.

"Something's wrong Sukuna?" you asked, your eyes had drifted and you wondered what he thought. Was he daydreaming or anything?

Sukuna swallowed back the bitter words he was going to spit and only said "push your ass aside. I want to see what you're doing"

"Did you ever say 'please' in your former life? Your mother didn't teach you how to be polite?" you replied with an uncaring tone.

Sukuna didn't say anything more but sit next to you and shuts his mouth. As time goes on, you notice his arms locking you against him.

"Damn curse, asshole" you mutter, making your boyfriend's lip curl upwards. Sukuna was certainly going to make you regret your behavior in the bedroom.

Fushiguro Megumi

It was after he got some rest. Last mission has been tiring and he couldn't move anymore. He insisted to take a long bath and since you have to prepare for your own to come you left him rest properly within water so as to allow his muscles to relax.

Nothing big until now. Though, when Megumi's tired, he tends to be a little bit more clingy. Call that a need to be warm or reassured, I don't know but here are the facts. Nothing big here either.

This time though, Megumi thought he would never see you again. It was close and your arms were perfect for some mental rest.

You weren't accustomed to Megumi being more clingy than usual. It wasn't something regular in your relashionship and your boyfriend was quite of a distant guy. Hugs and cuddles aren't his thing.

You were scrolling down Instagram. Liking random accounts of posts you appreciated.

You sense Megumi's presence and he sits on the couch next to you. You don't pay attention to his gestures but to the words he might say.

You kept scrolling, observing the posts, being impressed by how people can be insanely talented but your lips were sealed.

Suddenly, you feel Megumi's head coming to rest on your shoulder while silence engulfed you. The sole noises came from the TikTok videos some Instagram users shared.

Then, the hand which wasn't holding your phone entwined with Megumi's. His hands were getting colder and colder.

"Do you want a cup of tea, Megumi?" you asked with a low voice so as to not disturb the moment you shared.

Your boyfriend shook his head lightly. He was getting sleepy and catching a cold is not in anyone's priority.

You opened you arms and Megumi put his legs on yours, then starts to cling to you like a kitten lacking of affection. You know very well that this situation was possible because your beloved one is tired and seeks for rest. He tried to look at the screen of your phone but your warmth shushed him.

If he wasn't already sleeping, you would have probably cracked a joke about the fact that now he was going to learn violin with Gojou. Yuuji told you your sensei was teaching 'Twinkle Twinkle Little Star' to him. Which is definitely priceless. Although, the joke had to wait tomorrow when Megumi's fully aware about his environment.

Finally, depending on your strength, you either lift him or wake him up so as to go to bed. He will need your special "heroes' breakfast" after all the events of these last days.

Eventually, you kiss him on the cheeks or the forehead before saying goodnight.

Gojou Satoru

It's probably gonna be funny.

You were used to Gojou being Gojou. Way too cheerful, badass, stupid, cheesy, sassy...

Breath in. Breath out. Everything's gonna be fine. He didn't do anything yet, which is ultimately dangerous. What's gonna happen?

You were scrolling down Instagram and, yet, in the atmosphere, you felt something stinky. Like electricity or clouds gathering before a storm.

Though, you let go. You were chilling on your couch, your eyes locked on the screen of your phone and everything was fine for once. You loved Gojou but he was such a human mess.

Not even a second after, a loud creak echoes in the room, the door hits the wall, a long leg appears through the doorframe, a white-haired guy with an exasperating smile on his face. It was all you were able to notice since your boyfriend was in the corner of your sight.

With time, you learnt how not to be scared of Gojou's behavior. You knew very well how he was able to look as a creep for the people around and your presence made them relieved to see someone by his side. As if he was mentally ill but he isn't alone in his disease, this detail being a relief for folks around.

You knew Gojou was an amazing sensei, you can observe it everyday. But you had some doubts about him as a human being.

Gojou literally broke into the room and you were still on your couch. You barely looked at him, used to this kind of noisy behavior.

Gojou literally walked three steps to join you. His head came so close to yours that you felt his breath on your lips.

"Hello Y/NNNNN. Did you miss me?"

"Hello Gojou" you only replied while your interlocutor got closer to kiss you softly.

Still, there was a nice post in front of your eyes. Your attention was completely drown in it.

Your white-haired boyfriend circled you in his arms and went to make you lie on the couch, his body crushing your own. He kisses you everywhere like a puppy licking your face after having been far from you for a second.

"Go-Gojou stop !" you scream before being shushed by his lips

"No way. I missed you so much. This trip in Tokyo was so long without you"

Goodness... Eventually, you allowed him to kiss you as much as he wanted. You missed him this incredible man so much too.

Getou Suguru

Sincerely the most efficient to attract your attention besides Gojou because he knows what to do.

You were enjoying your time on the beach that day, scrolling down Instagram, enjoying or not people's posts.

You heard the sand crack under someone's slow steps. You recognized the gait as Getou's.

Light. Balanced. Yeah, it was him for sure.

Mahito and the other curses were playing elsewhere with Jogo's head.

You feel Getou getting closer to you and just settling down next to you, then tries to find a confortable position and rests his head on your shoulder, caressing the skin of your arms.

You sense his touches getting stronger and stronger. He also tries to kiss you and get away the screen of your phone to have your complete attention.

"Good afternoon to you too, Getou" you greet while your boyfriend's soft hair tickles your neck, making you slightly laugh in reaction.

"Let's go inside. I wanna cuddle with you and it's too hot out there"

Eventually, you left the beach and went elsewhere, following your boyfriend who was kissing you along the way. He couldn't miss the opportunity to have you all for himself while the other curses are gone.

Characters who will probably not care about your uncaring behavior (on surface at least, which might be a different story when they think about it) :

Maki, Mai, Momo, Ieri, Nanami, Mahito, Inumaki

Will make you pay your boldness (probably with your body and it's going to be painful) :

Fushiguro Toji

Hi sashiii ❤️ I saw your recent event and I was wondering if I could request Ace x fem!reader with a Romeo and Juliet kind of trope? (But with the happy ending of course 😉) Forbidden lovers planning on running away together and they finally meet but can’t seem to keep their hands of each other? And it can be NSFW please 🧚🏼‍♀️❤️ thank you so much I hope you find this prompt fun 🙈

Hii beautiful!! of course!! I did actually not just use the "Romeo and Juliet" torpe, but also made a little adaptation of it!! I hope you like it!! thank u for requesting! 💖

👑 Oh, Royal Lust Event ~ Royals AU event.

𝐧𝐬𝐟𝐰 ~ 𝐏𝐨𝐫𝐭𝐠𝐚𝐬 𝐃. 𝐀𝐜𝐞 𝐱 𝐅! 𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫 ~ 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐏𝐚𝐭𝐡 𝐓𝐨 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐒𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐬

tw: inspired on Romeo & Juliet, it's my own adaptation to Shakespeare's work of art, with a good ending (or maybe not, who knows, maybe both died and they find themselves in the after life... is up to you to decide which path chose). nsfw. oral sex, romantic and fluffy vag sex.

wc: 2.9k

Want more? visit the masterlist

The freckled boy, the son of your enemies. The sun that shines always on his beautiful noble manor and his gardens. His wavy black hair flows with the wind, and his shirt always ends up in the ground when he trains during the afternoons. And he knows, the daughter of his father’s enemy looks at him from her own room, high, high in a stone tower.

His eyes sometimes meet, and the pupils burn, burn in desire…Because they are enemies, yes. But they are also lovers. They love each other.  But nobody has to know.

The sun sets, the night comes and as the stars form constellations on the sky, his freckles do over his cheeks. Cheeks you got the chance to caress, so soft, so sweet.

“Name! Name!” he calls you from outside your windows. You widen your eyes, is that… him? The flowy fabrics of your night gown shine with the moonlight that filters in between the curtains as you walk towards your balcony.

"Ace? Ace! Where are you? I can't see you!"

Suddenly, him. He is quick and strong, and you suspect he has been training hard his body just to be able to climb to your room.

“Hi…” Ace whispers, always so respectful of you. “Ace… I told you we shouldn’t do this! What if our families find out?” you whisper back, so happy, and so scared because he has crawled up your balcony in the middle of the night. “If we broke the truce the Prince put for us, we will have to pay with our lives at sword point”

Ace sighs, it’s painful for him to be so close and yet so far from you. And frankly, your heart aches too. But you know you have to wait because love always wins, right?

“I’m really sorry, (Name)… I couldn’t look at you from my garden any longer, I needed to have you in my arms” he says, coming closer to your lips. His slightly tanned skin, his mouth so tempting.  “Let’s run away. They will never stop hating each other, (Name)” he urges, as you go dumb just by the warm breath over your lips. “I don’t care about dying, as long as I can be with you”

You have to stop yourself from kissing him, and from crying. How is he planning on running away? They will notice, you will be found by the guards.

“Do you remember the first time I saw you?” he asks, remembering that banquet that he attended uninvited to find his brother’s lover and try to convince her to go back to Sabo. You nod, how could you forget the dance where it was announced you were looking for a husband. A husband you weren’t allowed to choose. “I do… you were the one who illuminated my life, Ace”

Ace sits properly on your balcony and pulls you closer, your face rests on his chest and his arms surround your frame. “Since then, I wanted to marry you… would you marry me?” he says, kissing the crown of your head. If there is something this man masters is beautiful romanticism without even trying.

Your eyes become watery, and there is nothing you would like more in this world than marrying the man you love instead of a random Count of your Kingdom. “A-Ace… of course I want to” you mumble, grabbing his clothes in tight fists and crying over the teared cravat of his shirt.

His hands land on the small of your back, pushing you even closer against his body. Then, warm fingers graze your chin up. His blazing eyes fix in yours, and the tip of your noses touch. The sweetest kiss follows, star-crossed lovers that have so much passion ready to be unleashed.

Will it be tonight? Will it be this, a beautiful hot summer night, the night where their bodies melt?

“(Name)!! Is everything all right?” your nanny’s voice echoes from outside your room, the noble young girl has to be monitored, she is a lady that must be respected and taken care of until you are walked down the aisle to another disgusting noble man.

You quickly break up the kiss, your face inspires true terror. But Ace knows how to ease your fear so easily… “Calm down, I got a plan! Wait for me, tomorrow night I will help you scape. Do you trust me?” he asks, brushing your hair back and earning a nod from you, putting blind faith on him.

He crunches over the balcony, grabbing his fancy burnt orange beret. “See you tomorrow, I love you” he mouths. And just when your nanny opens your door he jumps off and disappears into the night.

“Is the lady ok?” you nanny asks, coming towards a startled you. The warm breeze of Verona kisses your cheeks, and your heart pumps faster than ever. “I- I am…” you barely mumble, with eyes fixed into a marine blue velvety sky.

You server turns you around to discover some tears running down your face, she cleans them and sends you to sleep. “Still thinking on that young child of the Portgas, right?” she asks, helping you get into bed. “Tomorrow night will be a big night, Lady (Name). You will meet your future husband in the banquet” she says, tucking your sheets under your armpits.

But… I’ve already met him…

A new day has started with many servants getting you ready for the big night, you were made even to take a bath in milk and roses. Your hair, your nails, everything should be perfect for the party. Your beauty should be enhanced to the maximum… what a futile attempt to make you happy.

And as the night came, with your eyes always looking at the gardens of your manor, you never once thought Ace’s promises will be empty ones…

The banquet was noisy, violins, cellos, and everybody would wait for the tarantella to be played just to dance with their future lovers. And there it is, the man that will marry you… but Ace… where is Ace?

“Come on, (Name). Smile a little, we have accepted your request to wait a few months to get married. Now show some gratitude” your mother tells you, annoyed at your sadness. “Yes, mother…” you answer back, forcing a smile that’s painful and not real.

But, like a sun through the door, a little funny clown appears to animate the nobles and riches getting their bellies stuffed of the most gourmets preparations. “I’m the God of the sun! of laughter! Please, those drums of liberation!! Play that song for me!” the buffoon says, stretching himself and jumping all around.

You smile, it’s inevitable not to do so. He indeed looks like the Sun, a Sun in the middle of a night… and the drums of liberation? What does he mean?

Dancing to the sound of the barrels he comes closer and stands in front of you. “SHI SHI SHI! You must be the young lady, the star of this night!” he says, and quickly snatches some meat from your plate. 

You can’t help but laugh at such lack of respect, he is too cute not to do so. He stretches his cheeks and shows you a big smirk, his eyelids have paintings and in his forehead the word meat.

“You like the stars when they form galaxies in the sky, (Name)?” he asks, all of a sudden. “Do you know I have a brother who has them all over his face?”.

You quickly understand what he meant… is this Ace’s plan? “I love them, I love the stars” you tell him, Ace is a true star.

“Cool, then, you should go to the kitchen after the party, I’ve heard you will find the way towards the stars if you eat something sweet! I did find the path towards the sun eating your meat! Thanks!” he whispers and jumps away to keep entertaining the party.

You are left startled. Ace…

You couldn’t wait much longer, of course you couldn’t. And right after the last person left the place and everybody was wasting his time fawning on a Count way older than you, drooling and waiting for a couple of months to pass to have you in his arms, you ran to the kitchen.

“Chef Sanji!” you find the blonde chef of your mansion smoking in his workplace after a long night of hard work.

His blonde locks move when he turns around to you, a sweet smile and a cigarette hanging from his lips. “Beautiful (Name)-san” he salutes you.

“I have come for something… sweet?” you ask him, well aware one of your guards is waiting right outside the window. Probably he had been chatting with Chef Sanji, even though they don’t usually get along.

Sanji lets a little chuckle out; his expression shows how much he understands what you just said. “To find the road to the stars?” he asks, opening a little wooden cabinet from the kitchen. “Uh…” you think twice about saying yes, the guard is looking at you with his single eye.

“Calm down, he is here to help you too… Lady (Name)” he sweetly whispers, putting in your hand a little truffle and looking at the guard with a cute smile. You observe the little dessert over your palm, and then to the cook and the green haired guard.

You open your mouth and close it again several times, what is that supposed to do? How is it going to help finding Ace?

“Eat this, it’s as sweet as spicy. It may burn a little, but then, the sweet chocolate will ease it. Just like love, (Name). You will fall asleep for a day; you will be safe. You will be taken to Dr. Marco. You know him?” Sanji asks.

You nod, Dr. Marco has always been your family doctor. But it was also the Portgas family’s doctor too… “Thank you guys…” you whisper, taking the truffle and letting the burning sensation in your tongue numb your life as you run through the halls of your home.

A new Sun awakens the cobbled streets of Verona, the heat of a summer over Italy make some flowers still shy to open after a long night.

You lay on your bed, completely unconscious. No response, even the strongest knocks on your door does not wake you up. Door that’s open by your nanny and mother, to find an inert body resting over your bed.

“My dear (Name)!” “Call Dr. Marco right away! She is not breathing!”

Doctor Marco fixes his glasses as he tries to find a little bump that would indicate your heart is beating on your cold wrist. But he says he cannot find it. You are gone, for ever…

Left over the stone of your future grave, your family members cry heartbroken. How did that happen? Why have you passed away? So young, so beautiful… Roses surround your body, all around that stone where your back rests. Your hands crossed over your belly and your hair let down framing your peaceful façade.

A dying sun caresses your cold skin with orangey rays that filter from the garden, the sky is tinted in lilac and the summer breeze plays with the silky fabric of your dress. The night slowly comes, and with that your family leaves your grave to rest, perhaps, a little.

“I’m here…” you hear, a whispering voice that warms your heart. “I’m already here, I’m sorry if I made you wait”

Soft hands over your cheeks, the warmth of his lips on your forehead. Slowly easing the comatose state, you were in by kisses and caresses, loving touches, full of hope and liberation. “A-Ace…?” you mumble while trying to beat the heaviness of your eyelids. You feel your mouth dry, but that doesn’t matter because the first thing you see is the galaxy on his cheeks.

“Hi” he whispers, tucking your hair behind your ear. “Hi…” you utter, smiling so happily. If this is a dream or if this is reality, it doesn’t really matter.

Ace’s lips slowly reach for yours and closing your eyes you receive them. The first kiss of the new rest of your lives, along with his fingers interlocking with yours. Kiss that turns into the most passionate session of tongues dancing. It’s been so long, how many days you have waited for his kisses, for his hands?

“Should we get married first?” he asks once he lays next to your still a little weak body. “Let’s get married under the stars, right now” you tell him, sure marriage is nothing but sealing your love in an eternal promise.

Ace smiles, for the first time so sincerely, happiness fills his heart, and does yours too. “Do you take me as your husband, (Name)?” he asks, kissing your hand. “I do, (Ace). Do you take me as your wife, Ace?”

“I do, love of my life”

He pulls you up, sitting over the cold stone but surrounded by a blazing love, by a blazing desire. The freckled young man hand’s rest over your shoulders, slowly sliding your sleeves down them. Sweet pecks over your neck, down to your collar bones. None of you could wait any longer for this, you simply can’t.

Over the stone that would close your tomb, you will seal the deal that makes you free. The love that will lead you to a new life, what a beautiful paradox.

His kisses slowly makes you lay over what is now your bed, he takes his beret off revealing the wavy raven locks framing his galaxy face. You help him take his shirt off, barely ripping it with your own nails. Finally, his body, all for you.

Tan skin from a hot summer, from endless days training on his garden under the sun. His fingers buried on your hips, lifting your right leg. Leg that ends around his, carving your heel onto his calf. Hardness against wetness, his kisses don’t limit to your lips. Desperately nibbling your neck, and the little valley in between your breasts.

Ace, like an unstoppable beast, begins devouring you. Sucking, licking, biting, pulling. Getting drunk on your whines, you in rapture. More, more, I wanna feel you even closer.

The freckled man, goes down, tracing a wet path from your chest to your belly button. He stops right there, after kissing around your navel. His fire eyes fixed on yours, lust has taken his body host and you won’t stop him. His fingers squeezing your hipbones tight. “Spread, (Name)… please” he commands, showing you what he wants to do with his watering mouth.

You do, lifting your legs and spreading them so he can fit in the middle. His smile turns into a smirk, a dark smirk. Ace plays with your fine lingerie, first touching the dampness of the lace that covers your sex. His nose buries them on your sex, still covered, but feeling every sensation his lips create. He kisses first, and licks then.

“Can I?” he asks, still waiting for your permission to take your underwear off. You only moan and nod, you need him to do so, you really need it to. He smiles, kindly this time, kissing first your inner thigh and then sliding your panties off.

The white lace slowly goes down your legs, getting to your feet. Ace plants a loving peck over the arch of your foot and then the clothes are finally off. He pounces back in between your legs, with the utmost care he only tastes your dripping arousal with the tip of his tongue, breathing warmly over your anatomy. It makes you squirm; it makes you arch your back.

Yet, this is just the beginning because when he spread your labia with his finger and attacks your button of pleasure, you scream hard. Your moan echoes through the night, and you are pretty much sure everybody had listened.

But, frankly, you don’t care.

Ace, Ace keeps eating, nurturing from your sex, taking you to heaven so sweetly and sinfully. Hi trace circles, he sucks, and he even uses his fingers. Fingers to which your walls get used to, as they open their ways inside of you.

Climax, that unknown sensation finally taking over your body for the very first time, warming and taking you to edge of glory from the loving actions of your husband. The freckles that sprinkle his rosy cheeks now, peek up your core to simply enjoy the beautiful expression of your ecstasy.

“Ace, keep… going, please. Come here” you mumble when your breath normalizes, you need him inside of you, you can’t wait any longer. “Sure, my love” he accepts, crawling up to you, planting a honey kiss on your lips.

Ace wipes the little drops of sweat on your forehead and looks at you with the softest expression you’ve ever seen. His adoration towards you reminds you of a goddess worshiper. And indeed, he is, he considers you as his goddess, precious divinity.

“Do you want me to make love to you, my dear?” he asks, with his forearms at each side of your face. “Make love to me, my lover”.

Bellies touching, breathing into each other. Himself invading your insides with care and soft motions so you get accustomed to him. Slowly moving in and out once your clenching walls allow him to do so.

Resting his body weight over his left side, he makes love to you with eyes fixed on yours and his right hand caressing your cheek. “I love you” he repeats on and on, until words aren’t needed or can’t be said. Moaning and confessing how much both love each other, seal your first encounter with raptured feelings as if you had finally found the path to the stars...

“Let’s run away and never look back” 💖~

Alone in the dark (Shindo Ainosuke X Male Reader)

Summary : When Ainosuke seeks for relief in unknown arms and finds you.

TW : NSFW. Mentions of alcohol. Drunk sex... (and still my awful English, sorry)

A/N: Even after all this time, the poison this character inspires and inoculates is still hard to handle. I love him.

A shadow. He was only and he is only the poor pale specter of his past. Far and alone from the path to go home and the fire of relief Tadashi was able to lit in him. The latter or anyone who could make him a better man than he was right now. He needed so much right now. Forget was such a beautiful word and an unreachable goal. He wanted to be drunk, to allow alcohol soothe his aching body. His needs changed of nature, turned into something else. Gut-wrenching passion was making itself echoing through his skull, his mind. Everywhere.

The urging pressure of desire was unsatisfied. His roaming, bold hands were climbing along your leg. The blue-haired man was probably unaware of the whore-like appearance he got. Not a detail you seemed to care about either. He wanted you so much. The stab of hunger was penetrating further in his insides, taking his breath away as well as the last shreds of wisdom he possessed.

"Please..." Adam begged unconsciously in a whisper.

A veil was covering his senses. The world was silent around that man, yet so busy by people in that bar, stuffed of strippers and explicit musics, among the calls of human dirt, screams in the distance where he could not locate. A bliss in that disgusting universe. Adam felt himself climb on someone's lap, thrusting like a dog to get some pleasure. Some seconds, a song he was able to recognize, money and a few words after, he felt dragged in an elevator. There, Ainosuke didn't bother anymore to act like a civilized man. The coldness of the wall was maintaining him while he got undressed for you. A sort of regain of control shook him but your hands were already caressing his skin.

Finally. He would get what he craved for. Love. Passion. Desire. The feeling went unsufferably strong and he begged again for more. Longing was strangling Ainosuke, your lips on his were lightly, patiently, intimately bringing him to the verge of insanity. Your kisses, slow, sweet, unbearable made him consider for a second the idea to stop this fall into despair and nonsense. Yet, he found it so hard to avoid, so naturally bearable like his humanity. Chaos, shame, sin fitted him like his suit when he goes to S.

"Please. I... Need more..." Asked Adam.

Suddenly, the soft fabric of sheets fell on his back. Even though it was quite the contrary. Your lips. Your body. Your presence. Your pressure. He needed it hundred times stronger.

"Look at me." You ordered, vour voice sharp as a blade cutting through Adam's skin.

He did so. Crossing your image above him. You were so desirable, so charming. He needed you entirely.

"My name's Y/N."

"Y/N" Ainosuke repeated while his world turned into a hazy landscape.

He was watching his world dance, fall to rise again, shake at the rythm of his eyelids opening or shutting. Sometimes it was mere backflow or a slow stroboscope cutting each of your moves. Ainosuke felt like he was in heaven, caressed, loved passionately while his body and aching for much. As if he was craving for powerfulness in some types of music but even heavy metal wasn't giving him the beat he was looking for. That was fustrating and he didn't know you sufficiently to judge on your performance. Except that his internal microcosm has been intruded by some pain. Even though alcohol numbed everything, the cock pulsing and rubbing new intimate parts of him was driving Adam crazy.

You sensed your that blue-haired man lose his mind, giving all the shallow praise you needed in his screams of pleasure. Yet you knew he wasn't himself fully. Your tight grip over your nameless partner got stronger as time went on. To the point you were leaving marks on his delicate ivory skin. You couldn't help when you saw him get on your lap and thrusting on your thighs to excite your desire. He moaned shamelessly when you grabbed his ass and told him all these dirty words. He didn't bother either when you were nearly tearing up his clothes between your eager hands. And when he cummed for the first time, without realizing it. He was miles away from the moment, in the drunken people's realm.

Besides the blurry and limited world before him, Adam never felt so well since such a long time. He was even considering if he ever felt so alive. Your thrusts inside of him got him drowning lower and lower in his hazy world. When he cummed for the third time, a thunderbolt seemed to wake him up. His muscles tensed up, without warning but he wasn't able to do anything except accepting to open his mouth and lick your dick like the whore he was. His clingy tongue was perfectly fine and your delicious reactions made his heart flutter for no reason.

Maybe was it the thought he was pleasing someone without figurative leash around his neck? Maybe because it was you and his body responded so well to every of your desire? No. It couldn't be this way. He didn't know you. He felt you somehow, he was drinking to liquid pleasure, adrenaline was poisoning him, fear, loneliness, Tadashi's reject... Everything was meaninglessly mixing within his haunted mind. He didn't want to know. His sole purpose was your pleasure. He might behave like a slut but he didn't care. You were here, all alone in this hotel and he want towards you, craving like a dog in heat. He got what he asked, even this creampie all over his face.

- Come here. You ordered simply.

Adam obeyed swiftly, way too much maybe. The blue-haired man sensed you kiss the places where you left those beautiful marks of the pleasure he gave you. You were sometimes sucking, biting, licking and so on. He wanted you. He needed you again to find again this hazy state he was so good within. Ainosuke felt you hot, divine mouth around his cock. Whereas you left a trail of saliva along his shaft, you got lower and lower until you were able to make him comply without discussion to your touch.

Your fingers caressed him nicely though your tongue was making him see the stars and beyond. You made out several times after, Adam was near to faint. His body was still replying to your touch but his moans seemed as if they were muffled. He was reaching the end of his forces, surrendering totally. He cummed another time then just left himself go into sleep's arms. Night was going to be short enough, you would leave him rest in the bed. Yet, you just got on your legs and went to seek out for a towel or something to allow your nameless lover to be clean.

As drunk and out of mind he was, you surely thought he wouldn't complain about some rest. You got him rid of all the cum spread on his cheeks and his face and covered him with the bed's blankets. You considered leaving without a word but it was such a nice experience with that blue-haired man that you didn't want to forget. Yet, your so-called wife and your children wouldn't allow it to happen. You weren't fated to love a man. A businessman like you has no right to do so, it would provoke inevitably an impact on your life and you didn't want this to happen, whatever it would have taken from you.

It's with this mindset that you left the room but the touch of this smooth skin, the confortable haze clouding your best jugement would still linger a little more on you. You had an appointment with a family named Shindo several hours after and getting some rest would be appreciated. It was apparently about some investments for some politics carrier.

A dreamless slumber [Bucky Barnes X GN Reader]

Summary : Bucky is suffering so much and craves for some relief

Warnings : None. Just a bit of fluff, self-hatred, fears, tears, despair and my awful English(sorry)

Words : 11k

A/N : Can we just talk about how Sebastian Stan is handsome, talented and absolutely charming? Because we are never giving half of the justice he deserves. And Happy Birthday to him, by the way. 

Everything was dark. A house. A garden. Some faded roses. An empty swimming pool full of dead leaves, sweeped by the cold wind, and a lonely chair resting here. Yet, it was a sunny day over the house. The pale light was giving a dull aspect of the elegant building which was now decaying slowly, just like nature when autumn was coming.

It was such a grim landscape. Sadness was heavy like a stifling gas in a room. Choking everything. Bucky was getting deeper and deeper into the house which has almost the size of a small but noble mansion. The living room had a white-marbled massive fireplace. Ages ago, it would have been the best place to be when a delicate snowy coat would have covered the ground and the fir trees of the garden. The glints of fire were almost visible and several fake memories of happiness hidden behind a delusional smile and a faceless silhouette embracing Bucky were appearing on front of his eyes . Dreamy, he went almost despaired when he blinked and the image vanished.

It was a happy illusion, contrasting with the gloom hanging in the room. His vision range went blurry, disturbed. Slightly, piece by piece, the living room fragmented, falling apart. Until he reached a full blackness. Bucky was feeling himself heavier while he was waiting for what's going to happen. The black-haired murderer couldn't move. Not even his metal arm. Which was making him a little bit afraid. He knew he was stuck in his brain, far from reality, and unable to have some control over it. It was this kind of lucid dreams he hated so much because it would remind him awful memories of his moves, his actions he preferred either forgotten or atoned. Although, the last option wasn't truly a possibility, considering who he was.

He reminded the scientist with glasses. Then, the other one who slapped him for a report after remembering who was Steve. All the faces and names were merging, echoing through his skull like a headache way more powerful than the usual, mixing memories all more painful than the former one. He was feeling physically the pain when they put his mind in a blender, making him a monster. Electricity coming along his muscles, the stength he used but the inefficiency of all of it while he was held back in his chair. A mental whiplash crushing his memories as if a whole contingent of soldiers armed to the teeth was marching over him, the rhythmic step hammering and crushing his bones. And death. Coldness of the Grim Reaper's scythe going down along his spine and in his veins while he was standing as a tool of the human beings' insanity and ambition.

The light illusion went in front of him as he thought having shut his eyelids. The reassuring flames of an unknown but somehow familiar setting full of gentleness and love on the couch in front of the fireplace mixing with the ghostly stir in Bucky's body was giving him one of the worst and most cruel nightmares he has ever had. A contrasting fire was blossoming in his chest, as if his insides were torn apart by his anger and uneasiness. He wanted to die. He demanded all of this stop definitely while he was almost doomed to live for an atonement when everyone wished he was dead. He would call someone to end up everything right now. He hated himself as much as he could and even more. This burning anger was causing him a headache among other things. Bucky was longing for relief, craving for embrace, affection, love– something which could let him having an opportunity to change. Obviously, he wouldn't get anything. A monster never truly stops to be a monster.

Although, during a little second, only one, in the darkness of his deepest imagination, a whisper went through the thick mist clouding his mind. Bucky found himself gazing towards the place where the soft voice was echoing. He didn't find the location, his thoughts were noisy and the image blurred during a little time. Like the flat surface of a lake disturbed by the silent roars of some dreadful deep-sea creatures. "You have to wake up" was all the calm, cristal-like voice, said as if a fairy was playing with his nerves. Several balls of fire appeared in the darkness of this endless ocean of pain. Tender imaginary moments, warmth of a home, of a friend, of an illusional lover standing in a doorframe with nothing but a smile on the only visible lips. All that formed the shape of a happiness that Bucky wasn't worthy of. The fireflies, so small at first, got bigger and bigger. So much that the black-haired man felt almost overwhelmed by so much warmth. He let his fingertips being slowly tainted by this welcomed light. Some tears escaped from Bucky who sensed his heart getting lighter and lighter as time went on. Along his skin, the welcoming and soothing heat passed through his bones, his muscles and even his metal arm became flesh. As if the soldier nevel fell down from the train.

He was feeling so good. That night terror was so cruel. Bucky craved for all of it and he knew very well he was chained to his own monstrosity. His heart was corrupted by a helpless hope which would never come true. Those repeating thoughts were digging a deeper hallow in the man's heart. He felt the salted bitter taste of his tears on his lips and his tongue.

Suddenly, something changed. Sharp as a blade cutting his skin, cold as water on his skin when diving, freezing air grasped his senses when his eyes widened in the darkness of the room where the black-haired man was sleeping in. He sat up on the mattress, sweating, seeking the truth in the half-dark landscape in front of him. His erratic breath lasted a long time before it finally calmed down. Bucky's ribcage was aching, eager to find air. And finally, the gasps ended. He toughly got back from the unconscious realm of imagination and deepest feelings.

The man was shaking, shuddering. In the end, his limits reached their furthest extremity. The delightful taste of peace broke everything. A sigh later, Bucky grasped the blankets and laid down on the bed, covering himself. Tears were still flowing down along his cheeks while he just watched vaguely at the ceiling.

The sun rised over the Avengers' headquarters. Muscles strangely aching and sore from his night, Bucky didn't feel the mood to get up. Though, he knew better than staying like a lost puppy under his blankets. He had to get up and have some practice in case he had to fight. He put some comfortable clothes. His shirt was leaving little to imagination about his metal arm and the strength the prosthesis possessed. He went straight to the training room. Silent was the master in the buildings. They all were sleeping. Eventually, Steve would join and both men could practice efficiently before breakfast. Around 5am, some might get up.

Although, Bucky wasn't expecting you, of all the people, to be awake so early in the morning. You were giving some punches to the training dummy while some music was echoing through the room. Your rhythm to beat the dummy fitted the beat of the song. You weren't conscious about the man's presence, due to your entire focus on the target of your kicks.

Suddenly, the song changed and you found yourself decreasing your pace against the poor dummy. The silence and low beating added to the singer's tone made you consider the fact that you might not be alone anymore. After a final hit on the punching bag you gazed at the trespasser in front of you.

"Hey" you greeted softly while you were stepping towards the source of music.

You switched off the device.

"Morning" was all Bucky said.

Your eyes were following the man's silhouette.

The situation was awkward. You didn't know what to say. Bucky wasn't really a talkative person but you should come up with something. Anything. Yet, you failed. You had the possibility to start with music but the man was stuck in 40's, you hadn't any knowledge about the tastes of the people from this decades. Or you also could've asked about how he was going. You had no idea on what to do.

"Why do you stare at me like that?" Bucky questioned quite brutally.

"I was wondering why you came here. You are usually not here so early" you improvised quickly.

The man surprised you. His tone was sharp like a blade and even though you didn't know each other pretty well, it doesn't prevent that you remained cordial. He killed Tony's parents after all. He doesn't have any right to speak this way to an Avenger.

"I've had a bad night" Bucky mumbled at a very low volume.

Your gaze softened a little. Yet, you had no idea on what you should say. You know how it felt, and you didn't manage to sleep well last night either. Something troubled you and you had to handle it with your powers. That was so annoying. The identification of your target came too late and someone somewhere must have felt a sudden relaxing during a particularly resonating nightmare. You weren't able to even say who could've receive all these soothing waves of powers you sent via your own imagination. That was all a thing but developing your story background was pointless. You were a threat only leashed by your agreement done with Tony Stark years ago when you corrupt most of the Avengers' mind and almost destroyed them. You found a comfortable nest in the tower, then the compound. Everything fine since this moment. And your favorite sparring partner was undoubtedly Wanda, mostly because of the similarities lying in your powers. After all, it is always easier to get along with the same kind of monstrosity as your own. The sole difference between you was the fact that she accepted herself a bit easier than you. But all this was only detail.

The Winter Soldier embodied by Bucky was now turning towards a punching bag next to your own. He slightly pulled up his arm and put himself on the position of beating the target in front of him. He only made a swift movement. The strength he had set into his arm bursted out the metal chain which was keeping the inanimated training device hanging in the air.

You stared at the poor object lying, completely demolished, next to the impact he created in the wall.

"Poor thing" you commented, feeling sincerely sorry for the bag which never asked for such a punch.

You turned your back to Bucky and carried on the little fight that you had before the man's arrival. You sensed his gaze upon you more than once but couldn't have cared less. You were too busy and deaf thank to the headphones you were now wearing. A little less than a hour later, you left the training room and headed toward your shower. Once it has been done, you went in the kitchen and started to prepare some breakfast. You planned to go outside this day, with Tony's agreement. It was sad but it was also the rule. You remain a monster for most. But this is it. There's nothing to discuss, as displeasing as it sounds.

The faces of your 'roommates' started to appear some short minutes after you went in the kitchen. Clint came to help you. He couldn't prevent himself to make some jokes about how you used your telekinesis as one of the most useful tool ever. Even the deadly, black, scary hands coming from out of nowhere were an amazing help for any sort of tasks. Even though they were quite dread.

Steve, Natasha, Sam, Tony... All of the people came one by one. That was quite funny to see their sleepy faces. You took a very quick breakfast, hardly an apple or whatever, and headed down the compound.

"Why is Y/N such in a hurry?" asked Steve when he noticed your disappearance at lightning speed.

"They got the necessary approval to go outside today. With, of course, being constantly tracked and everything clear about what they do and the places they go." Tony replied with an empty tone, he didn't like these creepy decisions about you.

The latter didn't want you to live in a prison. And yet, this is what he had to do. At this, point, keeping you in a lost hole would have been more legitimate. You weren't causing enough harm to be submitted to the chains of the worst cages ever constructed it seems.

"Natasha will have to keep an eye on them." the genius, billionaire, playboy philanthropist completed.

"It sounds that you have to worry a little then. Because there's no more signal." Clint countered when he checked over Natasha's shoulder on the screen the plan of the cities around and your supposed geographical position.

Your powers granted you to cover a vast field when you used them to fly, as Wanda could have done. You had the silhouette of a huge bird, maybe like a condor, or even bigger. Your so-called wings were made of your orange energy, mixed to a 'spell' allowing you to overfly the grim world you existed in. Once you get down on earth, hidden in a dirty alley between uneven and crumbling buildings in the dangerous and somehow most remote places of New York City, you just went here and there. Your main idea was to enjoy life as you would have done if you weren't kept jailed in the compound because of these stupid powers of yours. All of this was delightful. A bitter taste suddenly invaded your mouth and your whole being while you figured out how it would have been without taking your fair part in the Avengers' stuff.

You joined the biggest shopping malls very easily and quickly. And you felt so free here. Surrounded by the noisy streets of NYC that a lot of people judged unsufferable. It was definitely not your opinion. Silence was sometimes even more traumatic and breaking than any scream. And it was a grey day today, matching with the sky's desire to let drop the rain, as a sort of release of pressure. You loved the hues of the clouds today. You didn't care about the rain.

Midday came sadly too soon. Plus, strangely, the tracker you crushed between your fingers even before having left the compound didn't result in a panic coming from Tony who wouldn't know where you were. Not that seeing the powerful and very composed Iron Man completely out of control because of such a small detail wouldn't be funny as hell. You enjoyed your afternoon while listening to a street musician. He was playing saxophone. The gentle and entertaining tone of the instrument made you release some waves of your power, influencing people's minds and unconsciously getting them to dance with more or less talent in the street as if it was the most normal thing ever.

You ended your day by wandering through Central Park accompanied with those grey squirrels way too much friendly for your taste. You didn't want to get back to the Avergers' headquarters. It was too soon. Your day of freedom was already over and you couldn't stand it. That was beyond yourself. Returning in this endless custody was too hard, freedom had such a sweet and addictive taste.

The night started to fell down, slowly. Your time was really over. You found a bench while you were still wandering around Central Park. The Avenue, you didn't know which one and you had no care about this detail, had calmed down. It was more silent, even though cars were still present and their headlights were now shining through the settling darkness. Beautiful black and deep blue clouds, epitomizing the God's anger, were gathering again. More menacing this time. You enjoyed the moment when the glass broke somehow, when a twisted lightning bolt would make the shape of an arc across the New York covered sky. You sheltered yourself under an umbrella of compressed air where the rain slipped through. You liked the song, like some fairies' laugh. So comfortable. You could have cried.

Yet, you found yourself torn from the illusion. It was so beautiful. But the responsible for this wasn't so worthy of scorn. A little ball of fur lingered under your legs, a safe place apparently. A cute little puppy was giving you a sad look while shaking due to the sudden invading coldness. You took the little animal between your hands. You were only able to see him thank to a lamp post pegged next to that very bench. Even with a visible fear, the puppy left you take him against your chest. Whether it was a cat, the little animal would have loudly purred. You could feel the high contentment of the little dog. He was so sweet, so cute and sheltered in an energy bubble, not outside in the tempest and under the danger of flying branch due to strong winds.

You take a lot of time petting the animal. You could tell he was happy, mostly because of his unceasing nuzzle in your arms. You were smiling. Then, you straightened up your posture. Cold and penetratring rain was now dropping. The yellow light of the lamp post lit a circle barely five meters large around you. Your shield was enough, yet you couldn't figure out about the person observing you. It may be Hydra. Or anyone else. Still, something dangerous was moving, protected by shadows. You carried on your petting over the puppy's head. He wasn't even moving an ear, deeply asleep as he was.

You unleashed an orange wave shaped as a circle. The trespasser dodged it. "Fine" you thought. You left the little puppy on the bench, protected under the energy bubble and went under the freezing drizzle.

"Come here if you dare. Coward." you provoked with a dry and careless tone.

Though, whether you would have been that foolish, you wouldn't have come here with no possibility to win. You felt a quick movement behind you. A move in the air which came till you but nothing to make you fear anything. He or she or whatever is the person, they were still swift, nimble and particularly bold to attack you from behind. You used your powers and created some orange arrows. One of them them exploded in the torso of this so-called killer. You let yourself be distracted a second about the assailant's identity. Who would be foolish enough? This time, you didn't feel the punch coming from the side and you manage to dodge it at the very last second. A kick went right after, sending your unbalanced body hit the lamp post several meters away. The ground was dirty and wet due to the rain. You mumbled several insults while you got up yet another blow came to you. Although, you had just the time to create an energy shield, stopping the move. The person you could identify right now as a man carried on to hit you again and again. Nevertheless, you were sheltered, protected. You had the time to form a real spell in your hand and throw it over the aggressor, making him still and controlled.

Air was twirling around you, as freezing as before, as paralysing as chains. A little bit more and you could've found yourself back in Sokovia. Several leaves danced and followed the wind's moves. Some philosophers would have found inspiration in this if some words originated from a foreign language that you recognized as Russian didn't have echoed there. The man you were holding with your energy was now on rampage. As if he was somehow reactivated, like a robot or some machine, trying to do some brutal movements so as to free himself. He wasn't going to leave so easily anyways. Following the sound, you created a ball in your hand then modified its shape for a sword. You sort of influenced the weapon you were making. Hence, in the grand alley in front of you, you unleashed the orange energy-made saber chased the voice all around you. After, no time you heard some screams of panic, an explosion of medium size due to the energy sword and finally a bigger one corresponding to some helicopter or whatever. You didn't care for it in the end.

You felt your cell phone ring in your pocket. An incoming call from Steve.

"Y/N where have you been?" said the crackling voice.

"I'm near Central Park."you replied with a low tone, full of wariness.

"There's some Hydra agent out there. Be careful. And Bucky fled from the compound" the man continued.

You couldn't help yourself but to release a mocking laugh.

"Too late, Cap."you ended there the talk.

You went ahead in front of Bucky who was watching you with a deadly look in his eyes. It is when you reached out your hand to touch him that he almost freed himself and tried to throttle you.

"Calm down, Barnes." you ordered to the man who didn't come to a standstill.

Talking to him wasn't enough it appeared. Not without fighting when he was in this internal distress. You were able to hear his screams inside of him, aching to come back to his senses. You strengthened the grasp of your energy around his wrists and his shoulders, getting him completely still under your control. You cupped his face and forced him to gaze into your eyes while you were looking for his real self. His soul was buried deep in his mind. You found interesting memories here and there. Torture were the most powerful ones. There was also a young man resembling Steve. You couldn't help but laugh. He was so small. You may not say to the powerful Captain America that he was ridiculously cute when he was younger. Though Wanda could be interested in the mental image you got. You searched deeper and deeper, kind of probing, Bucky's soul.

You suddenly felt a sort of globe when you were sailing into the ocean of the man's life. Or at least, what he remembered. The painful and unwanted murders he had perpetrated against those people who didn't deserve to die. You knew very well how to control someone's muscles, even someone's mind, due to your powers. Yet, breaking the spirit, the moral and making a weapon of a being, even if you were also able to do it, was something you never committed to anyone. Yet, the person's who managed to destroy Bucky's soul the way they did was particularly vicious. To recover from it was almost impossible without help and a safe place to stay as a start. No one could say that the compound was. Tony's resentment was still present and the former Winter Soldier didn't have the right to struggle against it. The latter should say that the one who hated him the most was himself for having killed Tony's parents, as well for every of his targets. He hated himself for all the mothers and fathers he made cry, every family he destroyed, every wife, husband, child he ruined the heart.

You would like to say it wasn't his fault, he was a puppet, that people's judgement was unfair. Then, you felt something in Bucky's body. He was waking up somehow. You withdrew from his mind and release the soul glancing you were giving him. The man's muscles relaxed brutally and he fell down on the wet ground. The rain might have stopped since a certain time now. But your clothes were drenched and Bucky's ones could be very uncomfortable now.

"What happened?" the man asked while he was slowly getting up.

On your left, you heard footsteps echoing on the tar. Soft. Rhythmed. Almost military. It was Steve for sure, certainly wearing his Captain America outfit. Sam was following him.

"Are you alright Bucky?" questioned the blond-haired man.

You frowned a little bit when you heard the interrogation. And you ? You were the one attacked ans still he was more interested in the well-being of this snowy cretin more than yours. You displayed loudly your dissatisfaction and turn your back to move towards the bench where the little puppy was still peacefully sleeping. You took the animal between your arms after checking he wasn't belonging to someone with a collar or something. Then, you opened your energy wings which took you off the ground. You landed only several minutes after in the compound. Natasha, Wanda, Rhodey, Vision and Tony were discussing in the living room while, as you supposed, waiting for you in the building. You didn't care about them and brought your little abandoned puppy into your room. Tony tried to talk to you but upset as you were you didn't give him a glance. You shouldn't care about Steve being worried about Bucky, as you've seen in his mind, they were close friends. Although, you have been an Avenger for a longer time than the Winter Soldier. These Sokovia agreements –or you didn't know what their were and you didn't give a shit about that– weakened enough your team. Choosing between Steve and Tony has been hard and in the end, you didn't get the freedom you hoped. It was barely worth the struggle.

You heard the door closing behind you while Tony was trying to catch you up, keeping the man outside of the room. You used your powers to create a little dog bed with extra blankets and left the puppy inside, as if he was in a nest. You asked to the artificial intelligence to order some dog food adapted for your new friend. And so did the God knows how was called the voice upon your head. You put your pyjamas on and went to bed. It was nearly 2 in the morning and you wouldn't spit on some rest. You fell asleep thinking about the scars left by this war among the Avengers.

You woke up earlier than you would have liked if a furry, troublesome, awfully cute little wasn't licking your face. You couldn't help but freaked, straightening up suddenly under your blankets. It was 6am.

"Gosh..." you whispered while you tried to hide from the puppy's display of love.

Then, you reached the animal and pulled him up against you. You didn't think that what wanted this creature would be your touch, considering the way the animal was clinging to you. It didn't bother you. Most likely the contrary. Right now might be the time to give him a name. However, you had no idea on what could be adapted for such a cutie. He was all black. 'Kuro' might be an interesting option. You would see later.

You had to get up and go practicing on hand-to-hand combat. But this morning, you were accompanied by a sweet little puppy. Its legs were so short due to his young age and must running to catch you up on your way. The compound remained silent. Everyone was still sleeping, which definitely was a nice considering what happened last night. On one hand, your disobedience to the Sokovia agreements, refusing to comply to these stupid rules. On the other hand, the fight with Bucky would be debated. You didn't crave to spend your days in a jail in the middle of the Pacific Ocean or God-knows-where.

You reached soon enough the door leading to the training room. You left the bag of equipment you brought and your little puppy climbed on the bench where all your stuff was more or less unpacked. The animal tilted his head to the side, watching you with great interest. It didn't take a lot of time before the little creature lied down upon the seat and sleep peacefully, catching up all the sleep he needed. You turned your back to the puppy and went towards the punching back in front of you. You nearly jumped out of your skin when you saw the black figure of Bucky meaning back against the wall. You didn't know he had that in him. That was so scary. Besides, the thought of not managing to stop the waves of energy running in your blood was another source of wariness. You spent a certain time trying to figure out what was happening inside of the man's head but he remained as shut as a nutshell. Which appeared displeasing to say the least.

His gaze was hidden behind his long locks of hair. His breathing was not heavy but a bit loud. Was he present here for long? You couldn't say. You were as stuck as the last time. What should be the right words? Not saying anything may be the best thing to do among all the possibilities. In reaction to this thought, you lowered your head a bit and then walked to the punching bag waiting for your attention. You hadn't started for a minute that Bucky was next to you, so close you could've sword he was your shadow. Even though he remained at a very reasonable distance from you.

"You should keep your arm a little higher or you would have it broken in a real fight" Bucky abruptly said to you across the room.

You have been a bit startled by the tone he used, attracting your attention over him.

"What do you want, Winter Soldier?" you asked with neutrality.

"Don't call me that way. I'm no longer a killer under Hydra's orders" he countered with an annoyed sigh.

You looked at him during a certain moment. Not saying anything and studying every of his facial traits. He wouldn't lie anyway.

"This doesn't resemble to what I've seen last night" you replied more severely.

"I..." the man started but he didn't carry on.

He glanced at you a long time. A very long time.

"I am sorry. For what I've done last night. This... This wasn't me and I know..."

Bucky was hesitating, looking for his words. Though, every phrase, every syllab seemed wrong and clumsy to him. He eyes were stuck on the ground.

" 'I shouldn't be alive', 'I'm a monster' . 'Tis all what you have been thinking about for three minutes now." you uttered while giving a voice to your interlocutor's thoughts.

These last sentences didn't make the man move in any way. Pretty strange, wasn't it? His silence was more eloquent than the longest speech and truth sharper than a blade. For the very first time since the day you met, you stepped closer to him. Not that you were keeping yourself at bay from him but it was more on the emotional side. You knew perfectly that you were alike on some points. Not the same and yet not completely different either. As if you were watching your appearance in a mirror. But the reflect was troubled, disturbed, somehow betrayed, by the prism of self-consideration.

You left a long sigh escape your mouth and decided to focus on the punching bag.

"What did you say already? My arm should be higher, is that right?" you inquired and with it, the end of the small discussion.

You felt Bucky coming closer to you and he gently changed the position of your arm while showing you a good posture for a hand-to-hand combat. You swiftly thanked him, so quickly that the man didn't think he heard it correctly. No one has ever been grateful to him, except when he was doing his job as the Winter Soldier. Needless to say it was shady to say the least. He gave you some advices when it came to a fight with punches and kicks. You haven't thought about breakfast only a second. The time you spent in each other's company had been really helpful, particularly because of everything you learnt today. It was nice to talk to someone and to know more about anything. Your appetite for knowledge was stunning sometimes. Your practice session ended when Steve stepping in the room, stumbling on you both while Bucky was holding your arm after you tried to punch him in the face.

"Was a good one Y/N." The man stated before noticing his old friend from the corner of his eye.

He let you go slowly after allowing your arm to get down without hurting you. Your muscle had relaxed and Bucky's grip loosened on your wrist. His metal arm left some red markings in your flesh but nothing you weren't able to handle. It was part of the risks of training with the Winter Soldier after all. You gathered all your stuff, took Kuro with you and passed to Steve's side before showering. Everyone had their breakfast, you were the only ones who missed it. It seems that Vision made it, which wasn't reassuring considering the fact that he is actually a robot which never had the sense of taste. Your only hope remained in the fact that he often watched you cook or bake for the others. In the end, it wasn't that bad.

The sudden and amusing image of Vision walking through the wall of your bedroom to ask you what was the means to bring back memories flashed through your mind. Also, his frown had to be considered as iconic when you explained the concept of Proust's madeleine. This is how he got the idea of goulash for Wanda. Scents and dishes had the power to bring back memories and used it as a means to remind Wanda's past, her family and all she cared for. Even though you had no doubt that she cared for Vision too.

You swallowed quickly your breakfast and went in your bedroom as soon as you finished. You had to practice with your energy too. Its shapes, the range of your attacks and different parameters that no science could predict. You considered rapidly Kuro's presence in your surroundings, currently lying on your bed. The little animal has already been fed since he was now wandering in the compound. Everyone has met the new recruit on your team. Tony didn't agree at first but he finally ended by petting this lovely furry creature. It was quite the sight, his big hands on the puppy's head while he was doing some stuff and checking some things before the afternoon meeting which had the aim to discuss about the day before.

You weren't that afraid, you knew very well what to say in your defence. It wouldn't be the same for Bucky, for all you cared. You stayed here until after midday and the artificial intelligence commanded by Tony reminded you this meeting. Thus, you left your beloved room and joined the other. You sat next to Rhodey and Natasha, more likely circled by them but who cared? Noticing the man who will lead this encounter, the same who presented you the Sokovia agreements, some Secretary of State or whatever.

He displayed a tiresome soliloquy about the fact that you didn't respect the rules you had to follow whatever it takes. And yet, Tony may have countered with the fact that you did everything according what they desired by asking officially an outing. As if you were a prisoner. That was right, you weren't back when the hour came. And if you hadn't been here, Hydra would have been troublesome. What they could have done was not predictable at all and the consequences can excuse your neglect.

Tony's voice was unsure and the old man didn't seem to accept it.

"I can understand it was for the common good but still, what should I say to UNO, to the people, to..." the man was arguing with a fake resolving tone.

"Tell me, mister Secretary of State, or whatever is your role, don't you think it is a bit hypocrite to make such statements?" you asked rhethorically while gazing at your interlocutor.

"No, Y/N. Don't make this worse." Tony warned behind but you hushed him with your powers.

"We've already done worse. Wasn't it a sufficient failure to fight our own allies, fighters and above all friends? How could we beat our own score on the field of nonsense?" you snapped back with an authoritative and unusual volume of voice.

You glanced at each of the people gathered in the room while standing, but this has been an action that no one cared about. Everyone received its glimpse of scorn until you have been tired of. Maybe this could make them think a little bit about themselves. You turned your back and faced now the tall, impressive, more or less charismatic man in front of you.

"As for you, and not only for you but for all these UNO men and and women working in, you are spitting, criticizing tyrants to oppress people. And yet, what are you doing with us? Do you feel safer now that you locked us up like dogs with muzzle? Does this world is clearer, less dangerous? Or more opaque, somber and unreadable?" you snidely stated with a voice full of hidden anger and frustration.

"What should be said about the people you sacrificed then? For your successes"

"If it's about sacrifice that we are going to argue, so let me tell you once for all that the first ones who are going to do it, before folks or anyone, are the guys behind me. Something you never liked to hear mister the Secretary of State. By the way, what did you sacrificed to get yourself to the place you bear now as if you were a supreme authority while you are nothing more than a simple spokesperson for something greater than you? "

"As long as I remember, no one ever called you here, Y/N"

"You know, if dogs could choose their master, if they knew what it involved, none of them would be so faithful. Despite everything, I've chosen to help here because I still have an idea of what is justice, right and wrong. And not because a carrier was demanding it, mister the Secretary of State."

You ended there the conversation. Meanwhile you were hammering your opinion inside your interlocutor's head, and crushing any potentiel reply he could have given to you. The man lowered his head and noticed the danger of you being so close to him. He stepped backwards, making you stop in your own path.

"Well..." the Secretary of State tried before forsaking the idea of saying anything else.

Everything has already been said. What he could leave to you was a mere warning. Then, few minutes of meaningless babbling after, he gathered his people before giving some extra information and left as quickly as he came. Bucky's case hasn't even been evoked through this meeting. Was it a big issue? Not that much and you felt him grateful.

"You can be really threatening when someone annoys you." Steve stated kindly after the release of pressure within the compound.

The latter was delighted that you shushed the Secretary of State or whatever this guy was. May he report the meeting to his mates with ties and expensive costumes, you didn't care. You weren't afraid of the decisions that could be taken about you. It needed more to impress you.

The compound got back to its usual calm and quietness. Nothing bothered you anymore. You spent some time with Wanda who thanked for saying all you said to the Secretary of State. Even though with the tone you used to talk to him. Your bitterness and the emotions you put in your speech addressed to this grey-haires old man. However, you apologized towards your new leader for the issues he would face but you assumed it would go very well. The one who would rightfully claim he shushed the great Tony Stark wasn't born.

You chose a book among all you had in your shelves and started to read. It was Jane Austen, Pride and Prejudice, you didn't know that you had a copy here. You were fully captivated by the story when you noticed the night befell on the world outside. Vision came quickly to ask you if you were hungry and he got a negative answer. Though, he remained insistent on the fact that you should make an appearance in the living room for the movie tonight. They picked a bad one though, making you completely uninterested in the images shifting devoid of any meaning on the screen. You heard the thoughts of each Avenger and according to their internal remarks about what was happening in front of their eyes, you could say there was nothing exhilarating in this same feature film. You understood something about a documentary about beavers that could have been more enlightening according to Sam. Well, he didn't phrase it that way in his head but the idea remains the same. You just came in the lounge at the climax of the film and then disappeared again.

It is nearly 1am that it occurred that you didn't see Kuro in your room, which was definitely suspicious. Wearing your pyjamas at this hour of the night, you went down the stairs to find your little puppy. The ground was cold and your bare feet didn't make any sound. Yet, once you reached the possible location where your dog could rest peacefully, you found quite a sight actually. It was notoriously know after all that this furry ball named Kuro was sleeping nearly half of the day wherever he can be, meaning he would me more than happy to sleep in a cage full of starving lions.

"I can't sleep, Steve." Bucky said with an empty voice, almost cracking sometimes.

"Nightmares, right ?" the blond-haired man replied with a benevolent look in his eyes.

The first was petting carefully the puppy you were looking for.

"I can't even trust my mind when I'm awake. What should I do if I kill people while I'm asleep? What will stop me? "

Steve would like to say something but still, he wasn't able to answer the right thing to his friend.

"Maybe you should ask Y/N. They know a lot about mind control and all."

The suggestion wasn't devoid of good sense and the black-haired man had to admit that he had never thought about it. Requesting an advice and some help, even though it was only for sleeping never crossed his mind. And he may also lack of confidence when it comes to his weaknesses. He might want to be able to handle by himself.

"You're not alone, Buck" Steve ended with a gentle on his friend's shoulder.

Thereupon, you noticed your former leader getting up from the couch and left the Winter Soldier as he was taken far from reality by his invasive thoughts. He was petting Kuro very kindly and the puppy was resting peacefully in his arms. He didn't feel your presence nor sitting next to him, making him jump out of his skin. He managed to suppress his deadly reflexes at the last second.

"Sorry. I didn't mean to startle you" You apologized with a low tone.

Bucky shook his head rapidly. His eyesight was anchored to the ground, refusing to let go the detail that was catching so well his attention. His hand was petting mechanically your peaceful puppy.

"Are you alright?" you warily asked with a kind and unusual voice.

"I... I don't know..."Bucky mumbled while he pulled away his attention from the tile square he had his eyes locked on.

You saw him turn his head and gaze at you with a heartbraking despair and confusion, tears glinting in the corner of his eyes. Yet, he blinked. Chasing this poor view he was making of himself from your sight. You didn't mind. Having a smashed mind due to the torture, or suffering an attempt, was a harsh ordeal to overcome, mostly because of all the psychological consequences. And so did Bucky undergo since he broke free.

"You're afraid to unleash the Winter Soldier while you sleep, aren't you?"

The man nodded quietly. What could he add? This was the truth he was scared to death to kill more people. He was already fighting the dark waves of guilt in his heart, his effort couldn't be reduced to ashes and dust because of that monster slumbering within his head, equally part of himself as Bucky. He feared he would never get rid of this monster inside his head.

You lankily sighed and reached out your hand to leave a gentle tap on the man's shoulder. It was quite unusual for you to express such friendliness but, still, Bucky needed it. You saw his lip curl upwards when he looked at you. Fake or true, you never knew. Maybe both.

"This is not because you stop to sleep that you'll get any better. On the contrary, dwelling and not resting will make you increase your chances to lose control over yourself."you warned with a sharp tone, you wanted this to be engraved on Bucky's mind.

"Then what? What could I do when these fucking nightmares scare the shit out of me?" the man exclaimed with a barely controlled voice.

"Guilt consumes you. That's the reason why you don't allow yourself to sleep at night. You think you haven't the right to rest. Is that's wrong?"

Bucky couldn't move. The paralyzing truth froze his bones, disgust and self-hatred suddenly running in his veins. He didn't feel worthy to close his eyes and just have some rest, even for a couple of hours. The more he dwells, the more he was risking to kill someone, being out of control. You noticed him nod to your statement.

"If it is only about nightmares. I can do something about that."you proposed quietly.

Bucky glanced at you, a glint of hope lighting his face marked with suffering.

"You can do that?" asked obliviously Bucky.

"I've also heard the end of the conversation you had with Steve."

The man got a strange look in his eyes. What was he thinking about? You didn't know. You could answer this question but it wasn't your intention. Then, you gave up the idea and focused on the task at hand.

"Anyways, do you want me to use my powers?" you inquired with a pressing tone.

And once more, Bucky nodded. You requested from him to close his eyes and just breath lankily. So he did and while he was getting calmer and calmer then fully relaxed by the waves of your power. You approached your hand to his eyes and the orange energy shaping a ball released a hypnotic music within Bucky's mind and a short minute after his head fell on the back of the sofa. His muscles fully eased. Thus, you used your telekinesis and lifted the man until his room. He was almost cute, all happy with your puppy on his torso. He wouldn't have any dream nor nightmare. You suppressed his ability of imagination for several hours. Then, he would get it back and lightly getting up from the limbo of the deepest and most peaceful slumber. Folding down the blankets, you left your puppy and the man having some rest. They both seem delighted, though it was most visible on Kuro the dog spread out all along its length over the bed next to the man. The door shut behind you and you left to join your own bedroom. Numbing Bucky's imagination was more tiring than you would have thought but the Winter Soldier wouldn't show up. All in all, it was a small victory.

You didn't wake up when dawn had come to the compound. Your energy was a bit drained and your own rest has been more tiresome than really relaxing. However, it was the risk you accepted when you offered to help Bucky. And then, after a short night and the call from Friday to got up more or less easily. Watching you in the mirror had been a hardship, you barely recognizes yourself. You took some time to erase the markings from your tiredness and then, you went to take your breakfast. Clint said that he got the authorization to go back in his family and he was really excited to be able to finally see his wife and children.

"Sorry guys but I won't make you breakfast anymore" the archer joked with a singular glint of mischief in his eyes.

You smiled at him while Wanda was congratulating him cheerfully. And the others were all giving him warm comments and expressing their happiness for him. It seemed that Tony was personally insulted by this departure. As if the Avengers were torn apart again. You saw in his mind that he remembered when he fought against Steve but this image was blurred by a sweet filter of friendship for the warrior. The question of where was Bucky has been quickly raised. You remembered that the spell you used on him was still clouding his mind. You excused yourself and left the table to find the man in his room. Kuro was licking the man's face but nothing was efficient enough to pull him from the calm slumber. Thus, you approached your hand to his forehead and with a wave of energy you brought him to reality. It didn't take long before his eyelids would open and he could remember the world he was in.

"What...?" Bucky asked, his voice hoarse and a very eloquent red trace on his cheek.

"Hello." you greeted with a gentle tone.

"I..."Bucky started to say.

He wanted to ask if five minutes had passed since you employed that spell of yours. He remembered clearly asking you to use your magic or whatever you called your powers and then, he didn't know. His muscles were so relaxed, he was so calm. No dreams, no nightmares. A peaceful sleep. He desired it so much and he had it. No pain, no suffering, no memories –

Everything was okay. He couldn't help but a small smile curled his lips upwards, making his face glow with a charming aura. For a second, you felt that Bucky didn't have his guts tightening and tied in knots he couldn't unravel without being injured somehow. On the contrary, he sensed his heart being free and in peace. You made your way to the door and left there the man. He got up from his bed and caught up the discussion about Clint and his family five minutes later.

You spent the day trying to restore the energy you used on Bucky to numb his subconscious. It wasn't so easy though. You didn't pay a visit to the training room. Steve and Natasha were undoubtedly practicing right now. You didn't want to interrupt and your reflexes were altered by the way. Not being at the highest level of reflexion, reaction and everything alike was just a huge hallway to an injury. So you stayed far away from the room. You were watching Vision studying Kuro very closely, making Wanda smile and laugh. You were slightly worried for the puppy but the robot kept a very careful behavior towards the small and curious creature. By the way, the woman taught to Vision how to pet the puppy. You could see them delighted to experience something really common for a lot of people.

You were so lost in your contemplation of them that you didn't hear Bucky sitting next to you on the couch. You almost jumped out of your skin when you noticed him. You scowled him a little for being so silent and not warning you. A grin took its place on his facial traits and you swore internally you would kill him if he remained so glad to have scared you. Though, when he perceived your annoyed glance, his small smile fell down his face and he became more concerned by what you were going to say. Then, he stared at the ground and remained quiet for a minute.

"I... Wanted to thank you" Bucky voiced out, his cheeks slightly reddening. "I don't know what I could have done if you weren't there"

"You were hopeless, anxious and blathering nonsense. No need to be grateful. I did what I thought was right." you replied with an empty tone, as if your own words had no impact on yourself first, even though it was a lie because you were obviously happy about that.

A little bit of thankfulness for a monster such as yourself according to your own judgement was always delighting. You had no intention to say anything about it to Bucky however. A comfortable silence filled the space around you. Wanda and Vision took your puppy and went to play with him elsewhere. In the meantime, the Winter Soldier's eyes were stuck on your gaze, scrutinizing you where a not so long distance was separating you both. You could notice he was refraining from saying anything which might be inappropriate. You couldn't figure out what, though.

"Is there something you may want to ask me?" You inquired with a strangely gentle tone.

Bucky took some time to think about it. You noticed only now that he was particularly cautious around you, and with his words too. Having a completely different way to talk with you, in comparison of how he could speak with Steve. The best behavior to have in your presence.

"Can mind control be cured?" he questioned with a weird politeness. Not that it wasn't pleasing but it looked fake. His way to talk in old American English from the Brooklyn of the 40's felt natural coming from him. Not this Loki-like way to speak. You almost corrected it for that but it wasn't necessary.

“It’s not that easy but the effects can be limited, a broken mind leaves inevitably scars.” you added thoughtfully, brows furrowed trying to get the best answer to Bucky’s worries. “And a stable spirit in a stable body isn’t devoid of interest when it comes to this matter.”

The warning was clear and sharp, no more stupid ideas such as being deliberately deprived of rest. Despair and helplessness don’t mean recklessness. Your former sentence rang surely a bell within Bucky, making him flustered for such impatience to cause his own ruin. He should say he was sorry, though, what effect it would have? Other than an unwanted pity over him and a descent of the esteem that you did not have for him in the first place. Bucky thought you disliked him at best, loathed him at worst for the split among the Avengers and their reasons to fight. He should know better after the argument you had the day before. Humans were humans, even with powers beyond the common man.

“Meaning that you can heal me?” inquired Bucky while his eyes lit up.

“Did you listen to what I’ve just said?” you replied with a sharp tone.

It seemed that sleeping was raising a certain eargerness in Bucky. Not that it was disturbing actually, dealing with the Avengers also meant learning patience. You sighed lankily while you summoned a ball of orange light to test the energy left to recover in you. It would be adequate to you need of it for attempting aything on Bucky’s mind. You were simply accelerating the healing process. What was left after that was the man’s issue. Though, not only did the man had to tackle with the significance of your powers in him, but also with potential deadly aftereffects. It didn’t appear that it scared him. Quite the contrary actually. He responded with a sad look that he already was already tortured by these nightmares or memories and whatever could threaten him in his own mind, it wouldn’t be worse than what he was suffering. You didn’t agree with this last statement, objecting that it might not be what he needs.

Sincerely convinced, equally fostered somehow by what he discussed with Steve last night about your area of expertise and the skills you got after years of practice, he asked you to help. Under this condition, you would be ashamed to refuse him anything. You asked him to lie down on the couch and ordered him to close his eyes. Getting your hand circling over Bucky’s face while his eyes were open, turning more orange each second passing and then, the man tipped over into another world full of images without links between them except that they were known to him. You found another memories, slightly different from the day before, almost shifting and blurry. You figured out it was your presence. His emotions followed one another. It was quite intriguing to feel sadness then hope, anger, despair, hatred. Along your thorough expertise, you never found any peace, relief or authorization to slow down the rythm. Only raw sentiments, basic ones, almost shady, tainted of dark hues, ones which could never be lighter and closer to happiness.

You perceived Bucky flinch and shake a little when you reached a particular area of his mind. The illusion was darker, shifting. Delusions were how you worked to get the informations you needed, by creating a whole dimension within people but it wasn’t the point. The shape of what you had in front of you did not have any. More like a black hole, infinitely deep and heavy. Beyond a certain line, you could harm Bucky. Yet, you felt something beating here, like a heart or something. It didn’t have any shape, or you may not be able to give one to it. Was it literally the Winter Soldier? Or was it where the heart of Bucky was trapped somehow? You could not say, nor identify it. This was quite the infuriating puzzle but an interesting challenge nonetheless. You felt be withdrawn without your consent. Bucky was somehow waking up.

Then, you returned to reality and described what you saw. Bucky found himself clueless, you were the one with the talent. What you couldn’t say was that you were as lost as him. However, it was quite logical to consider it wasn’t such an issue after one session. And then you started a conversation about what you saw, asking for more details. You couldn’t say that the sight of a smaller Steve before becoming Captain America amazed you a second time. And you laughed about it. And some other things related to Hydra and Zemo among other things. He also told him some stories which happened during the WWII that no one talks about. There were also the fights and the opponents. He also describe the Brooklyn of the 40′s. Even though you watched it as if you were in Bucky’s place when women were interested in him. Not that it wasn’t the case these last days but he had enough to think about.

You found yourself getting closer to the man and it wasn’t the plan at the start. What you weren’t prepared to know is that since you were wandering within Bucky’s memories and all, he did it to you too. Accidentally. And he asked you about some of your loved ones that it hurt you to mention. Yet, since you will have to know your colleague and his darkest sides, you had to uncover some of yours too. Trust was the basis of the weak relashionship you solely had to have. And the more sessions went, the more you found some tenders sides in Bucky. Those were particularly hidden. The most treasured memories. If before it was only raw emotions you felt, right now they are a clearer shape and more details such as the twisting of Bucky’s guts when it came to Steve, the sentiment of failure coupled with a stronger one of confusion when he was punching the latter in the face or the despair. You sensed the emptyness within the man when the pipe or whatever was it when he fell down that train.

One day, you felt something strange around the projection of your spirit within Bucky’s mind. Lawless, powerful, you couldn’t identify it. Nonetheless, you needed it to unlock the thick, intricate mecanism around that beating thing. You figured out that if it was the Winter Soldier who waited patiently for his freedom; then you’d have to do something about it and put in a way more solid jail than he was already trapped in. When you asked to the man what he could be, he turned his gaze away from you. It was suspicious but you would discover what he is hiding from you anyways.

Bucky knew he couldn’t lie to you and... Well, how he’d be able to say to you that your way to soothe him was more efficient than you thought. He was keeping a little bit of the truth each time about his real state. He was a new man, he felt it. He didn’t feel any better in his head, he was still so afraid of himself, what he could do. Although, you were here and your gentle tone saying it was okay made him so happy. You were more reassuring than you imagined and the illusion you were giving of yourself. He saw it when he wandered among the floating screens of your unconscious and he watched you love someone passionately and lose this beloved one. You seemed so perfect together and here he was asking you to help him. In the darkness around him when he discovered all these details about you that he could have never guessed, he found the light of love shining bright inside your chest. And the wild thought saying you were in love with someone crushed him, and the mental link between you two gave you a headache for a week. 

Another day, you wandered to the man’s imagination, his regrets and the thoughts of what he wanted to say, to do instead of how he really acted.You found very useful clues here. And some you didn’t know what to do with. Which werre clearly unsettling. You risked to break the link once more but you held it still enough not to separate from him again. You had to admit that the illusion almost fell but you managed to stabilize the image before it turns all blurry and the mental breaks without possibility to resume the chain of thoughts you grasped some time before. Eitherway, every image would have been altered and not pue from Bucky’s influence. It wasn’t his fault however, you could hardly blame it.

“Are you sure everything is alright?” you inquired with a neutral tone while Bucky was somewhat captivated by the fact that he was trying to avoid your inquisitive glance.

“Yeah I am” he replied blankly.

“Yes, play dumb. It’s very funny, I assure you” you ironized with fake scorn to your interlocutor.

Bucky didn’t aswer back to your sharp tone. He was seeing things too and most of them were as unsettling as whatever you could’ve noticed in his mind. Knowing a person fully, each detail of the past as if being these very same people, was so unnerving and mostly scary. But then, the man liked what he saw and felt after all the hours spent in your own mind. He liked you, your being, your mistakes and your achievements. He has been amazed, raising and reminding him this forgotten sentiment called love, with all it implied.

“Don’t need to explain. I know” you ended there with a smile on your lips.

Bucky doubted of these sentiments storming inside his heart and his guts like sea monsters which are fighting for dominance over as illusional as the universe he was discovering sessions after sessions.

“You know what?” inquired the man with interest.

Your smile grew wider as you reached out your hand to touch his next to yours on the couch. As if it was kind of a reflex, Bucky leaned to your touch and left himself be. It was reassuring. And, as an answer, the fingers of his flesh hand curled up onto yours. Maybe the start of a new life. Both of you didn’t know. One day, you might be free.

i hate when other people are funnier than me.