Jaune: You Know, You Guys Didnt Have To Bring Me Along On Your Honeymoon.

Jaune: You know, you guys didn’t have to bring me along on your honeymoon. 

Nora: Aw, it was no issue Jaune. Right Ren? *Holds onto Rens arm*

Ren: Of course. Afterall, it was the least we could do after forgetting your birthday.

Jaune: It wasn’t that bad. Besides, you guys were busy preparing for your wedding, so it wasn’t your faults you forgot.

Nora: Either way, we thought you could enjoy the sights while we did some... newlywed activities. *Giggles like a child, still excited from their recent union*

Jaune: *Chuckles at Nora as he sets down their bags* Well, I guess all I can say is thanks. I’m gonna go grab the last of the luggage. You two just kick back and relax, alright?

Ren: Much appreciated Jaune. *Nods as he and his wife hold one another close, about to close in for a kiss*

Jaune: *Before leaving, he remembers something and pulls out an odd envelope from his pocket* Oh yeah, Ren, I almost forgot, this came in the mail before we left.

Ren: *Raises an eyebrow as he takes the envelope, opening its contents right as Jaune leaves the room*

Nora: Ooh~ That must be our marriage license.

Ren: Nora, this isn’t a marriage license. It’s a... restraining order?

Nora: *Shocked* Oh nuts! I was in such a rush I just grabbed the first form I saw and filled us both in.

Ren: It says we can’t be within... 25 yards of one another.

Nora: But 25 backyards is like... A lot! We got to get this fixed right away!

Ren: Nora, we need to file this to court if we wanna cancel it. And that may take a few days.

Nora: But... Our honeymoon. If we leave, we can’t enjoy it here. We’ve been looking forward to this for months.

Ren: I’m sorry, but unless we wanna risk breaking the law... again, there’s not really any other option.

Nora: No! I refuse! There’s gotta be something we can do to at least enjoy our honeymoon here, without getting in trouble, and until we can get this restraining order sorted out.

Jaune: *Kicks door open before coming in the rest of the luggage* Whew! Got the rest of the luggage guys! Anything else you two need before I head out?

Nora: ...

Ren: ...

RN: *Nod at one another*

Nora: Oh Jauney~ Do you think you could do us a big, BIG, favor?

Jaune: 🤨 ?

(Morning)

Nora: *Eating a nice stack of  chocolate chip pancakes*

Jaune: *Pops in with a bouquet of pink lotus flowers*

Nora: *Smiles as she takes them, waving outside the window to Ren, whom is currently doing some yoga*

(Afternoon)

Ren: *Driving a jet ski through ocean*

Nora: *Laughs joyously as her and Jaune water ski, her sitting atop his shoulders*

Jaune: *In absolute agony, trying his best to keep his balance, hold up Nora, and not vomit from the speed they were going*

(Evening)

Ren: *Ballroom dances with Jaune before releasing him with a spin*

Jaune: *Miraculously maintains his spin as he elegantly makes his way to Nora*

Nora: *Catches him before dropping him down onto the floor in an attempt to dip him*

(Night)

We see Jaune in bed with someone, sweat dripping down his body as he thrusts wildly into them from above. The creaking sound of the bedframe could be heard 5 rooms over, the frame threatening to fall apart with each thrust, as well as the feminine wails of pleasure from his partner. This stops, as with one last push, the two let out loud sensual moan as they climax together, Jaune grinding himself as deep as he could as he filled them to the brim. Sliding himself out, Jaune moves over to the side of the bed, catching his breath before grabbing and pulling up his pants.

Jaune: So... Like that?

Ren: *Pants in exhaustion as he sits himself up* Yes... Just like that. Nora will love it. So don’t keep her waiting.

Jaune: *Sighs* Hope my aura’s ready this. *Stands up and cracks his back before rushing off to go break out Nora’s*

Ren could hear his footsteps as Jaune made his way over to the guestroom, where Nora had been patiently waiting. The rooms here had such thin walls, he wouldn’t be surprised if Nora had heard every bit of him and Jaunes passionate fornication. In fact, he wouldn’t be surprised if that only aroused her more.

Nora: Took ya long enough! Now come to mama fearless leader~ 

Ren lets out a small smile as he hears Jaune and Nora quickly begin their own bout of sexual intercourse, sounding just as wild and passionate as his own, if not more so. A yawn escaping his mouth, Ren decides it’s time to get some shut eye, excited to see what the next day brought them. Afterall...

That was just the first day of their honeymoon.

(2 Weeks Later)

RWBY: *Waiting by the bullheads to greet the newlyweds once they returned*

Ruby: *Eye widened as her friends came into view* Hey, there they are!

Yang: It’s about time. *Squints her eyes in confusion* Wait, why are those two standing so far apart from one another?

Blake: *Shrugs* Beats me. Looks like they enjoyed their time though.

Yang: *Smirks* How much you wanna bet it’s because they spent most of it breaking in their bed?

Weiss: Do you have to make everything so vulgar Yang?

Yang: Jeez Weissy, it’s just a joke. No need to be such a pru... Is Vomit Boy ok?

Blake: He looks like he’s been drained of every ounce of vitality he had.

Ruby: You think Ren and Nora had him do a lot of work for them?

Before they could continue, they watch as Jaune collapses onto the ground. The team quickly rushes over to their friend, wondering if he was alright. They come across Ren and Nora, having not moved to check on their leader for some reason, instead lower their heads in grief for their fallen teammate.

Ren: He was a good man.

Nora: *A tear fall down her cheek* And virile lover.

Ren: ... Yes.

RWBY: *Looks at the two in confusion, no clue as to what was even happening... that is until one of them happened to remember something*

Yang: ... Wait. Does this have something to do with joke restraining order I sent you?

Jaune: Ren, we have to leave before they catch us, but we need to go get our weapons to stop Ironwoods crazy plan.

Ren: If we stop Ironwood’s plan, then Salem will able to reach the relics.

Jaune: *Grabs Ren’s shoulder* But if we don’t stop him all the people of Mantle will get killed. It’s like the hypocritic oath of Huntsmen Ren. To not get innocent people killed on purpose.

Ren: ... Jaune.

Jaune: Yes?

Ren: Kiss me.

Jaune: W-What?

Ren: You know you want to.

Jaune: No, I don’t.

Ren: You didn’t just want to kiss me just now?

Jaune: I didn’t.

Ren: Ok... But you’re right. Let’s grab our weapons and stop Ironwood! *Runs  over to weapon locker*

Jaune: Now we’re talking! *Follows*

Ren: Right here. *Opens an empty locker before shoving and locking Jaune inside*

Jaune: What the hell?! Ren! Open the locker!

Ren: You’ll spend the night here. General Ironwood is complicated, but he knows what’s best! *Walks away*

Jaune: Ren? Ren!

Jaune: ... I will kiss you.

Ren: Too late. The moment’s gone Jaune.

Jaune: Ren! We can do more than kiss! Other things! REEEN!!!

Jaune: *In hospital bed* Doc says I should make a full recovery. So long as we avoid as much physical contact as we can.

Ruby: Oh thank goodness. Guess we’ll need to be more careful from now on. *Gets ready to leave*

Jaune: Aren’t you forgetting something~

Ruby: Alright you goof. *Chuckles before blowing him a kiss* Get better soon~

Jaune: *Heart flatlines*

Ruby: AAAAUUHHH!!!

Jaune: *staring at Ruby’s thighs*

Jaune: I want them to crush my skull.

Ruby: What?

Jaune: I said this is such bull.

Jaune: So you see, the bite that we saw in Fnaf 4 was actually not the previously thought Bite of 87. It was actually the bit of 83, where the crying child dies due to his brother, Michael, shoving him into Fredbears mouth.

Bleiss: *Nods* Mhm. 

Bleiss: (Thoughts) Wow, he’s so dumb.

Jaune: Now, many believe this to not be true, as the source code for Fnaf 4′s teasers left the numbers 8 and 7 everywhere, but this was most certainly a red herring. Not only did the television in the crying childs home showed the date 1983, but Phone Guy back in Fnaf 1 stated the victim of the incident actually survived. Meaning these are, without a doubt, two separate incidents.

Bleiss: Right.

 Bleiss: (Thoughts) God, I wanna choke on his cock~

Jaune: What are you doing?

Ren: I'm posting false information on the web.

Jaune: Why?

Ren: It's fun. Someone picks up a strand of false information, spreads it around and before you know it, a panic is created. Then you just sit back and watch the chaos.

Jaune: I really should not have introduced you to Twitter.

Jaune: Thanks for inviting me to dinner Weiss. It’s a great pleasure to get to know your family.

Weiss: *A feint blush on her cheeks* Well, it was the least I could do for all the help you’ve given me.

Willow: Oh believe me, the pleasure is all ours Mr. Arc.

Jaune: Please, call me Jaune.

Willow: 🤭

Jaune: *Accidently spills drink on his shirt* Whoops.

Weiss: Oh no Jaune, your shirt. If you’d like, you can use our shower.

Jaune: No, it’s alright. It’s just a little spot. It’ll come out.

Willow: *Immediately splashes her whole glass of wine on him* Well that’s not gonna come out. You’d better take a shower~

(In Shower)

Jaune: *Whistling to himself as he bathes* 

Willow: *Cuts out hole in wall and peeks through* Oh my~ Quite the strapping young man you brought over Weiss.

Weiss: Mother! Let me see! *Tries pushing Willow out of the way*

Willow: *Holds Weiss back* Weiss, stop shoving! You wouldn’t even know what to do with it.

Weiss: He’s literally my age you cow!

Whitley: *Walks in* What the heck are you two doing in my room?!

Willow: Oh, hello Whitley. We were... just leaving. *Both her and Weiss quickly scurry off*

Whitley: *Curiously walks up to hole in wall* I say, what’s all the fuss about? I don’t get it, what’s in ther-BING BONG, Hello~