Actually Queer - Tumblr Posts

i mean im not trying 2 say anything bad abt cishet men but they did start WW2 and kill jesus and i’m pretty sure hitler was a cishet man/j

i was 2day years old when i found out that the term "femme" is not just specifically 4 lesbians but 4 any queer person of any gender who connects w/ the term [link here] and so now it's time once again 2 figure out if a term the straights said wasn't 4 me applies 2 me or not

is there a word for the intersection of ableism and queerphobia?/gen

cus given my own experiences and also how some ppl who r fine w/ other queer ppl will b rly vocal abt hating any labels that nd and mentally ill ppl come up w/ 2 describe their experiences w/ their queerness that is impacted by that e.g. cloudgender [a label 4 ppl who find it difficult 2 pin down specifics of their gender bc of dpdr]

not 2 mention ppl using us being nd or mentally ill as a way of saying that we can't possibly know our own identity a prime example of this being jk rowling attempting 2 use autistic afab trans ppl like myself against the rest of the trans community by saying that we're "being lead astray" and using the fact that we're autistic 2 try 2 make it seem like we don't know who we r

ppl rly do like 2 say that every disabled character in a queer relationship is child coded huh?

hey so since i just remembered that july is disability pride month i figured i'd go off since no1 can do shit, so let's unpack this post and y this bs of ppl saying every disabled character [especially those in queer relationships] is "child coded" pisses me off so much so i wanna start by saying that the term "child coded" does hav it's place, like w/ the whole 1000 year old dragon loli bs where the character is drawn exactly like how the artist draws kid characters, possibly also the characters even straight up calling them a loli or the character acting like an actual child or being treated like an actual child and them being a 1000 year old dragon is just an excuse 4 the piece of media they r in 2 put them in sexual situations [insert way 2 many anime as reference here] [dragon maid being 1 of them] or the other type of this trope where a character is literally stated 2 meant 2 appear like a child but is an adult and is still put in sexual/adult romance situations even tho it's stated they r meant 2 look like a child and it's clear that that's something the txt is playing into [huni from oran high school host club being a good example] [according 2 the wiki last time i checked it says that it was literally stated in the manga that he's meant 2 look 8 but he works at a host club and the story clearly plays into that given that his nickname is "the boy lolita", at least in the anime]

my problem is that some ppl want 2 act like disabled coding and child coding is the same thing and say that every disabled character is "child coded" and then from there say that they shouldn't b in relationships and ppl who use the term child coded 4 every disabled character seem 2 b even more likely 2 do so when the character is also in a queer relationship or when the fandom ships them in a queer relationship or has a queer headcanon 4 them

the most common type of misuse i've seen of this term tho is when ppl r shipping a character in a queer relationship and then some1 who is obviously made uncomfortable by queer stuff tries 2 say that the ship is a pedo ship by saying that they think 1 of the characters is child coded and this is a problem that has multiple layers bc w/ how it's being misused in this way it shows the following abt the person misusing it;

1] they c disabled ppl as children [especially feminine presenting and queer disabled ppl]

2] they don't want disabled ppl 2 b in relationships

3] they c all relationships w/ a disabled person as pedo shit

4] they don't want queer ppl in relationships

5] they c all queer relationships as pedo shit and so they look 4 any excuse 2 call it pedo shit even tho at least 90% of the time it's literally not

ppl rly do like 2 say that every disabled character in a queer relationship is child coded huh?

hey so i couldn't help but notice that while this post is good a lot of the replies r shit

there's a lot of ppl pointing out that "in txt magneto wanted 2 do a genocide against all non mutants" and while yes that is true there's more 2 it than that

the ppl who r saying magneto was right r not saying "genocide is super cool" what they r saying is "we shouldn't hav 2 play nice w/ the ppl who oppress us"

it's no mistake or coincidence imo that x-men is a series marketed 2wards ppl in minority groups and the representation of ppl who don't want 2 play nice w/ the oppressors is magneto, it's p obvious [at least from what little i've seen] that x-men is essentially just propaganda 2 try 2 demonise ppl who would rise up against their oppressors instead of asking them nicely if we can hav equal rights yet, not saying u can't enjoy x-men btw just wish that more ppl would watch media w/ their brains switched on instead of just ignoring all cultural context and then getting mad when ppl don't ignore said cultural context

it's like, disney villains were made queer coded 2 demonise queer ppl, and a lot of queer ppl reclaim those villains now bc of this, and no1 is saying that if a queer person reclaims a queer villain that that somehow now means that they agree w/ their actions in txt bc we r aware of the cultural context and keep that in mind

magneto was a character that was made 2 demonise ppl who's activism isn't oppressor friendly, i can't speak 4 what it was originally but at least what little i've seen it seems like it was written by the majority and marketed 2 minority groups 2 try 2 stop us from getting any ideas abt rising up against our oppressors

it's weird 2 me how ppl in the replies r saying that ppl who r saying magneto was right "don't hav any critical thinking skills" bc it just shows that they r just taking everything in x-men at face value w/out applying any thought abt cultural context and y the only guy who's anti oppressor is shown 2 b evil, like do u guys actually think that there's ever going 2 b a character in mainstream media who's in a minority group who's not willing 2 play nice w/ the oppressors who's ever going 2 b shown in a good or even honest light?? and i mean in a real way not in a "well it was just that we needed a different person in power" or "well it was just this individual that was bad not the system" kind of way

[sry if this is incoherent im typing this while sleep deprived]

i made a post earlier but tumblr fucked up the tags so i hav 2 put it all in txt :/

the post was

"not everything has 2 b an opportunity 4 u 2 try 2 prove u r a good ally sharon"

and i was gonna keep it at that and then leave the specifics of what i was talking abt in the tags but tumblr is a hellsite so i can't, i posted and immediately all the tags were out of order and made no fucking sense so im gonna just put the whole thing in txt here ig

this is abt me mainly thinking abt the ppl who hijack social movements 2 try 2 prove "what a good person they r" or act like we hav 2 make everything abt them like "the a stands 4 ally" mfs, the ppl who act like we in the minority hav 2 tone down what we're saying 4 them bc they would rather b comfy than acknowledge that ppl in their group r still hurting us

like the teachers and therapists who hijack every time a disabled/nd/mentally ill person talks abt their experiences 2 say "well im not like that" or worse the teachers and therapists who tell us 2 stop talking abt our experiences bc "we're making ppl afraid 2 go 2 school/therapy" and then they lie and say that "our experiences don't happen that often" like yes they do mf it's not my fault my reality makes u uncomfortable

this is also abt the mfs who act like im "racist" 4 saying that im mixed british and african when i say that bc i am, but some white ppl will say that calling myself that makes me racist bc "it's an insult 2 ppl actually from africa",,, like mf my grandmother was from africa and my mother was raised there, ur not as good an ally as u think u r

this is also abt the ppl who act like hating on mogai makes them a good queer ally, no it doesn't, also can't help but notice the stuff in mogai that i c getting the most hate is the labels that r there 4 nd/mentally ill ppl, hate 2 break it 2 u but ableism doesn't make u a good queer ally

also side note some of u just c a label and assume u know what it means, like u c the word "cloudgender" and assume it means some1 identifies as a cloud when that's not what that means, it's a label 4 some1 who the specifics of their gender r hard 2 pinpoint bc of dpdr [depersonalisation and/or derealisation] which is a very real thing 4 a lot of ppl, if ur such a "good ally" y don't u do the bare minimum research b4 u decide u know what something means

also while ur at it stop acting like every character in a queer relationship who's nd or mentally ill is child coded, like u guys will b like "[lists a literal common symptom of being nd/mentally ill] this makes them child coded" like mf no it doesn't hell some of u will point 2 a character being aro or ace or both and use that as evidence 4 them being "child coded" and u only seem 2 do this w/ queer ships [canon or otherwise] and i hav 2 wonder how many of u r doing that bc u c ace ppl, aro ppl, nd ppl, mentally ill ppl the same as children and how many of u r doing that bc u want any excuse 2 call a queer ship p*do bait neither of those makes u a good ally 2 queer ppl

i'm nd, im mentally ill, im aroace and im not a child, ppl like me r allowed 2 exist and hav relationships and yes that includes relationships that r obviously and unashamedly queer, sry not sry if that makes u uncomfortable and b4 u say "well it's not abt ppl like u" yes it is, im literally nd and mentally ill in the way that ppl use 2 say a character is child coded, im autistic and i hav dpdr as a result of cptsd so i hav moments where i just hav no idea what's going on, if i was a fictional character i would hav ppl on the internet saying that im "child coded" and that ppl can't like me and my partner being 2gether and that it's "bad queer rep" also even if it wasn't abt me that's not the point, the point is adults r allowed 2 b adults and being disabled shouldn't change that

i feel like a lot of activism is hurt by "allies" that just hijack our movements 2 try 2 prove "what good allies" or "what good ppl" they r and then they focus the movement around them and their ego and what they will and won't accept instead of our activism being allowed 2 b centred around us, the oppression we face and our goals 2 work 2wards our own liberation, the ways in which a lot of these "allies" try 2 prove that they r good allies is in ways that hurts the community they r saying they r helping or in a way that hurts another community that wouldn't hav been caught in the crossfire otherwise

[not saying all allies r like this but u do get way 2 many like this and it pisses me off]

so yeh, not everything has 2 b an opportunity 4 u 2 try 2 prove ur a good ally sharon

also the whole thing of ppl saying they don't wanna erase asexuals but then turning around and being fine with erasing allosexual aromantics, u guys being fine w/ "sex" being removed from the pride flag is like me saying that as some1 who is alloaro im fine w/ "love" being removed from the pride flag bc when most ppl say that now they only mean romantic love w/out any regard as 2 how that would erase the experiences of other queer ppl who r not me but while being ok w/ "sex" being removed is seen as a valid take if i thought "love" should b removed from the pride flag i would b flayed alive, y'all just care more abt looking acceptable 2 non queer ppl than u care abt the actual community

Is it wrong that I’m cool with “sex” being removed from the pride flag? They should bring back “magic” though.

Personally I think you’re wrong and an idiot but that’s just my opinion.

I feel like people, especially in regards to the queer community, need to realize that you’re not going to understand everything, and that’s ok. You don’t have to understand, you just have to be respectful. Someone identifies as a male lesbian? Cool my dude, rock on. Microlabels? Sure! I always like to learn new things. But even if I don’t understand your explanation, I will still respect your identity. Neopronouns? You’ll have to be a little patient with me, but I will get the hang of them! the world would be a lot better if we realized that we don’t have to understand everything as long as we’re respectful

; the sentences " micro labels are valid and can be helpful and validating to people " and " people don't have to specify every part of their identity to you to be valid, and can use broad terms even if their actual experience is more specific " can and should coexist.