Cw Abuse - Tumblr Posts

things to remember :)

(trigger warning mostly for things at the end)

charlie one of percys best friends died on a boat in the middle of the ocean while he was there and then had to go back to camp and tell everyone that charlie had died on a boat in the middle of the ocean while he the son of poseidon was there and he probably hates himself for it every single day

percy probably still has moments where he thinks “oh charlie would love this” or “yo this makeup is so cheap it would be a great gift for silena” or “wheres the dam water fountain” etc and then remembers they all died and is put in a sad mood for the rest of the day like when he thought tyson had died—sometimes it takes someone else to remind him that they have died to remember

percy thought tyson died before he could call him brother

percy watched his mother die then thought she was going to stay dead through out basically 3/4 of the first book

percy watched clarisse one of the strongest ppl he knew and looked up to break down crying after watching silena die

percy was abused mentally physically and emotionally for most of his childhood

percy also watched his mother be mentally physically and emotionally abused for most of his childhood (and she was probably sexually abused as well but he didn’t see that)

percy doesn’t know jason died yet and will probably think his death was his fault bc he didn’t go with apollo on his quest

percy blamed/still blames himself for biancas death

percy watched luke k*ll himself

percy probably beats himself up about not staying behind in tartarus to help

percy has been through tartarus

percy probably hates himself for what happened in nicos childhood

percy probably still feels guilty for leaving calypso on her island and for blowing up that valcano

percy was burned alive and i would be extremely suprised if he didn’t have at least one scar to show for it

after meeting reyna and her sister and hearing what happened he probably feels guilty about that too

percy probably heard/listened to reynas pegasus’s last words as they died

percy has ptsd and i mean every type of ptsd- he sometimes still feels the terrible burning sensation from when he was burned in a volcano he still smells beer from when he was younger he gets frozen in things that happened years ago and he still hears bobs last words when things get too quiet

percy 100000% has panic attacks flashbacks and nightmares about these things not just tartarus and they are 100000% worst at night

when percy does have really bad panic attacks/flashbacks he can be stuck in them for hours and if he doesn’t have certain ppl (his mom or annabeth) to help him out of it he can be stuck in them even longer

percy eats a lot bc he grew up with so little that he feels terrible for not eating everything and is always waiting for when he finds out there isn’t any food left

percy 100000% has depression and 100000% has anxiety/social anxiety he’s just learned how to put his needs aside and take care of other ppl first/instead

percy can be put out of commission for weeks when it gets bad and he’s just forced to lay in bed and cry and feel and not feel

percy feels worthless most times it’s not something he grows out of

percy hates public speaking/hates being the center of attention

percy wonders why he’s still alive and thinks it would have been better if he had just died like he was supposed to-why couldn’t he have just followed that one rule and died like he was supposed to-or that maybe to save some trouble for the future he should just end it now

percy wants to have kids but he’s terrified that he will end up like g*be

percy blames himself for what happened to sally while g*be was alive

percy was bullied for 80% of his life and probably doesn’t like/want/thinks he can make any mortal friends other than rachel

90% of these memories and feelings are probably repressed bc that’s how your brain usually handles big trauma like these and that’s why we don’t see him completely melting down like you think he would

percy has terrible memory bc his brain has cut out large chunks of his life bc they are full of trauma and as a side effect to what hera did

percy hates himself

that’s all just thought y’all needed the reminder :)

i might make a pt 2 for more sad things or some happy/cute things bc percy is my comfort character but idk yet when/if i do i’ll like link it idk

on the next episode of: things to remember :)

good morning to everyone except for me, who is thinking about how percy instinctively feels safe in the water to the degree that when he's burning alive and in indescribable pain he just summons an ocean. the exact line is like, "i needed the water," and it's just, out of context, he sounds like a college-aged huntington beach surfer dweeb who lives on his board and reads poetry about the power of the ocean. but in context, he's fourteen, in too much pain to think, and he brings the one thing that has pretty much always guaranteed immediate safety to his immediate person. he said fuck it, emotional support ocean. this is especially interesting if you remember how many lines percy has in the first series about feeling so bad he wishes he could drown. that's emotionally upsetting, the fact that even his emotional support H2O, the place where he - a kid who is used to feeling attacked and physically threatened - is literally nearly invulnerable, is also a place he thinks, "i wish this could hurt me," about. even the places percy feels safest, like with his mother, are places he feels like ought to hurt him, because they can. he knows that intimately. this is too fucking sad, instead can we think about percy listening to a very poetic common octopus talk about the power of the ocean and percy just nodding along like, "yeah, man, that's - it really is like that, you know, how the tides.... they just fuckin' go. can't stop the tides. the moon, you know, it's the - oh, the moon? it's, the, the sky... orb. i'm sorry, man, i forgot that octopus school doesn't have earth science."

no one:

me and my wannabe storyboard artist ass:

i finished sea of monsters and also wanted to practice storyboarding, so here you go.

so i think we can all agree that poseidon is generally a great dad to percy compared to the way the other gods treat their kids. i was re-reading tlt and i came across this passage...

i totally forgot this existed, but poseidon literally told percy “i wish you weren’t born” ?? and percy IS hurt by it, but he just brushes it away and tries to leave. imagine being twelve, and the first time you see your biological father he says that to you? percy is TWLEVE. that is so damaging. like honestly poseidon wtf?

the thing that makes this scene sadder is when we consider the fact that up until this point percy lives in an abusive household with gabe. it is canon that gabe is physically and emotionally abusive to percy. that being said, i’m sure there were times that he mocked percy for not having his biological father there for him. overtime percy did grow mad at his dad for leaving him, but at the end of the day we all know he would have wanted to live a normal life with his actual dad and sally. all the kid wants is to be normal. and i can’t even image the pain he felt when poseidon tells him “i’m sorry you were born” ? like excuse me sir what the fuckkity fuck? did percy think “damn maybe gabe was right? my dad does hate me” LIKE HDJKDK i know poseidon backtracks later, but still.

also this makes me upset too...

percy called his dad SIR... like i know that’s common for many people but i just think it goes to show how percy doesn’t really view him as the dad he always wanted and that’s a big let down.

and it’s not until percy has went on numerous quests and brought poseidon glory, that they actually start developing a father-son relationship. consider the birthday scene from botl...

i think it’s great and all that the relationship between poseidon and percy gets better, but it hurts to know that it took that much for them to actually start developing a relationship and it makes me so sad. the gods really do need to do better... all percy wanted was to have a normal little loving family but time and time after again he gets hit with shit. okay i’m done now.

r*ggie is gonna play five like a fucking fiddle in s3 here’s why

Must’ve hurt watching your siblings reunite with each other after max 3 years and everyone getting hugs and stuff, happy they see each other while you went missing for 17 years and got back like a week ago and even reuniting for the second time all you got were confused faces and a cold shoulder, no one even saying they’re glad you’re back and being told everything’s your fault

Request from anon who asked for gifs of three small moments that made them sad. I call this “Five realizing he’s in danger and backing away in fear.” (episodes include 1x02, 1x05, and 2x10)

Back to 'can't believe percabeth fans <3'

(I know you can download the image directly from pinterest but I wanted to capture the caption :p)

the cinematography really didn’t have to go as hard as it did in the moment where Five and Reginald are face to face for the first time in the show

Catra abused Adora.

I want to start off by explaining my own experience with watching She-Ra for the first time. I started to watch the show and continued to watch it for various reasons. But I want to make it clear that I wasn’t watching the show to see who ended up with who. I enjoyed the show mostly because it had such wonderful messages surrounding healthy families, friendships, and relationships. And so, one of the main themes of the show ended up being: abuse. 

The show demonstrated that abuse can take a variety of forms. The show demonstrated that people can suffer from abuse in different ways. The show presented that people can break the cycle of abuse and people can continue the cycle of abuse. The show demonstrated that in some cases people can try and help an abusive person, but the abusive person may abuse the person trying to help. The show also highlighted that people are allowed to leave abusive relationships.

Before we begin, I want to note that I won’t be answering the question “Did Catra’s own experiences of abuse influence her actions?” Because the answer to this question is obviously Yes. And I sympathize with Catra and the fact that she was abused while she was growing up. In addition, there’s a lot of complexity and depth surrounding the abuse Catra received. But Catra also continued the cycle of abuse. And in real life, people who have been abused can also end up abusing other people. 

Now, since we’ll be focusing on Catradora in this commentary, we must look strictly at the interactions between Catra and Adora. The reason behind this is we are evaluating only whether the relationship between Catra and Adora is healthy. In addition, if your friend told you they were being abused, would you ask the question, “I understand, but what about your abuser? Was your abuser abused?”. No, I don’t think you would. You’d ask your friend, “Is there any way I can help?” And so, in this case, Adora is your friend and Catra is the abuser.

Thus, the main question remains: Did Catra abuse Adora? And the answer is Yes.

(Please note that the underlined statements are hyperlinked to websites providing information on abuse.)

Signs of Emotional Abuse

Catra has unrealistic expectations of Adora:

Catra makes unreasonable demands of Adora.

Catra expects Adora to put everything aside and meet her needs.

Catra is constantly dissatisfied no matter how much Adora gives.

Catra invalidates Adora:

Catra undermines, dismisses, and distorts Adora’s perceptions of reality.

Catra accuses Adora of being “crazy”.

Catra refuses to acknowledge or accept Adora’s opinions or ideas as valid.

Catra dismisses Adora’s requests, wants, and needs as ridiculous or unmerited.

Catra suggests that Adora’s perceptions are wrong or that Adora cannot be trusted by saying things like “you’re not making sense”.

Catra uses emotional blackmail:

Catra manipulates and controls Adora by making Adora feel guilty.

Catra uses Adora’s fears, values, compassion, or other hot buttons to control Adora or the situation.

Catra exaggerates Adora’s flaws or points Adora’s flaws out in order to deflect attention or to avoid taking responsibility for her poor choices or mistakes.

Catra denies that an event took place/lies about it.

Catra acts superior:

Catra treats Adora like Catra’s inferior.

Catra blames Adora for her mistakes.

Catra doubts everything Adora says and attempts to prove Adora wrong.

Catra talks down to Adora.

Catra uses sarcasm when interacting with Adora.

Catra acts like she’s always right, knows what’s best, and is smarter than Adora.

Catra controls and isolates Adora:

Catra treats Adora like a possession or property.

Signs of Physical Abuse

Catra kidnaps Adora.

Catra scratches Adora.

Catra shoves Adora.

Catra kicks Adora.

Catra slaps Adora.

Catra uses weapons on Adora.

Catra physically restrains Adora.

Catra attempts to murder Adora multiple times.

Adora suffered from Catra’s abuse and Adora displayed the effects of this abuse:

Short Term Effects

confusion

fear

hopelessness

shame

Long-term effects

guilt

anxiety

Adora also tried tactics that are not effective ways of dealing with abuse:

Adora arguing with Catra.

Adora trying to understand or make excuses for Catra.

Adora attempting to appease Catra.

Adora also figures out how to properly deal with Catra’s abuse:

Adora makes herself a priority.

Adora establishes boundaries.

Adora stops blaming herself.

Adora realizes she can’t fix Catra.

Adora avoids engaging with Catra.

Adora builds a support network.

Adora deserves to be in a healthy relationship, which consists of:

Trust

Adora should be confident her partner won’t do anything to hurt her or ruin the relationship.

In a healthy relationship, trust comes easily and Adora shouldn’t have to question her partner’s intentions or whether her partner has her back.

Honesty

Adora should be able to be truthful and candid without fearing how her partner will respond. 

Adora’s partner may not like what Adora has to say, but should respond to disappointing news in a considerate way.

Respect

Adora’s partner should value Adora’s beliefs and opinions.

Adora’s partner should love Adora for who she is.

Adora should feel comfortable setting boundaries and should feel confident that her partner will respect those boundaries. 

Adora’s partner should cheer for Adora when Adora achieves something. 

Adora’s partner should support Adora’s hard work and dreams, and appreciate Adora.

Equality

Adora’s relationship should feel balanced.

Both Adora and her partner should put the same effort into the success of the relationship. 

Neither Adora’s nor her partner’s opinions should dominate. Instead, they both should hear each other out and make compromises when they don’t want the same thing. 

Adora should feel like her needs, wishes and interests are just as important as her partner’s. 

Kindness

Adora’s partner should be caring and empathetic to Adora, and should provide comfort and support.

In a healthy relationship, Adora’s partner will do things that they know will make Adora happy. 

Kindness should be a two-way street in Adora’s relationship: it’s given and returned. 

Adora’s partner should show compassion for Adora and the things Adora cares about.

Taking Responsibility

Adora’s partner should own up to their actions and words. 

Adora’s partner should not place blame and should be able to admit when they make a mistake. 

Adora’s partner should genuinely apologize when they’ve done something wrong and continually try to make positive changes to better the relationship. 

Adora’s partner should be able take ownership for the impact of their words or behaviour had, even if it wasn’t their intention.

Healthy Conflict

Adora and her partner should be able to openly and respectfully discuss issues and confront disagreements non-judgmentally. 

Adora’s partner should not belittle or yell during an argument.

Adora’s relationship should have healthy conflict by recognizing the root issue and addressing it respectfully before it escalates into something bigger. 

Fun

Adora should enjoy spending time with her partner.

Adora and her partner should bring out the best in each other.  

A healthy relationship should feel easy and make Adora happy. 

Adora should be able to let loose, laugh, and be themselves.

Adora’s relationship should not bring Adora’s mood down but should cheer Adora up. 

Adora’s relationship doesn’t have to be fun 100% of the time, but the good times should definitely outweigh the bad.

In conclusion:

Whatever Catra says, Catra’s violence towards Adora is unacceptable. 

Catra’s violent behavior is always Catra’s responsibility, not Adora’s.

Catra’s abuse is not okay or justifiable.

There are so many scenes throughout the series where Catra emotionally and physically abused Adora, and these scenes are captured on this blog. 

I just want to add that even when Catra emotionally and physically abused Adora, Adora continuously tried to reach out and help Catra. Adora gave Catra so many chances for her to apologize and rectify her mistakes. But Catra didn’t. Not only that, when Adora left, Catra continued to abuse people. Catra emotionally abused Scorpia. Then, when Scorpia left, Catra began abusing Lonnie. Catra’s abuse didn’t stop when Adora left, Catra just found a new victim.

In addition, there were so many significant moments of growth for Adora. Adora found people who supported her and did not abuse her. Adora began to heal from Catra’s abuse. Adora no longer made excuses for Catra. Adora realized that she is not responsible for Catra’s atrocious actions. 

Adora was strong and brave for moving forward in her life without her abuser. 

Moreover, Adora is a victim of abuse. Catra abused Adora emotionally and physically. Catra repeatedly admits to manipulating Adora in order to meet her own selfish goals. Catra did not show any remorse for her abuse against Adora throughout seasons 1 to 4. Catra continuously blamed Adora for her own atrocious actions. And finally, Catra attempted to murder Adora on several occasions. 

And here’s the most important thing. I don’t care who Adora would have ended up with. I just care about the fact that Adora ended up with Catra. What I mean is: I would rather have Adora end up without a partner, than end up with Catra.

Irrespective of whether you agree or disagree with my points on Catradora, these will be final points:

Abuse can happen anywhere at any time.

Abuse can happen in any relationship, including lesbian relationships.

Abuse is unacceptable.

Make sure YOU can recognize signs of emotional and physical abuse. 

Make sure YOU know that it’s okay to leave an abusive relationship.

Make sure YOU can trust and depend on your PARTNER/FRIEND. 

Make sure YOUR PARTNER/FRIEND knows they can trust and depend on YOU. 

Make sure YOU are being treated with kindness and support in your relationships. 

Make sure YOU are treating YOUR PARTNER/FRIEND with kindness and support. 

Make sure YOU are in healthy relationships and friendships.

In conclusion, EVERYONE deserves to be treated with love and respect.

Thank you.

Why Stanford Pines from Gravity Falls is Autistic, and Why It Matters

Here’s a meta I consider long overdue; the title says it all. I’ve analyzed Ford and why he resonates with me for over three years and casually lived in his head close to that magic number, six, but I’ve never addressed this fundamental reason. I’m not the only one who reads Ford as autistic, so I figured we deserve a lengthy manifesto. Now more than ever, we need stories of unconditional acceptance instead of voyeuristic awareness; April is the cruelest month.

Normally this is where I’d disclaim I’m no medical professional, but I don’t feel like enforcing normalcy. Autistic people are foremost experts on our own experience, and we don’t need analyses this extensive for permission to see ourselves in fictional characters. This analysis is also not concerned with authorial intent; in fiction as in reality, we’re here whether you want us or not.

I’ve divided this meta between various criteria Ford meets. Overly long post incoming, press j to pay respects.

Motor control issues

Let’s start tenuously before getting into weightier evidence - why suggest that a character who runs and jumps well into his sixties may have motor control issues? Because they can improve with practice, and Ford is markedly unathletic early in life. He’s introduced stumbling from trying to un-board the cave and insisting “I can keep up!” (dogear that). Factor in his D- in gym and the way he reads during boxing lessons intended to protect both boys from bullies, and it seems that Ford only became physically adept when forced to fend for himself without Stan.

Eye contact

Ford frequently averts eye contact during tense moments, which admittedly could indicate typical fraught emotions as much as a breakdown of performance. His deathglare toward Stan and intense gaze talking to Dipper could more strongly indicate that he makes eye contact consciously and counterintuitively, because he sees it as an assertion of power (hence his discomfort under Bill’s gaze). Ford’s shifty eyes post-betrayal, signature surprised owlface, thousand-yard stare thinking of “the dark weird road [he travels]”, and unchanging expression as he hugs Fiddleford and doesn’t register Stan are additional animation tics implying he breaks eye contact easily.

Physical contact

Ford seems to have a complicated relationship with touch like many autistic people. He easily startles at Stan unexpectedly touching his shoulder (as kids, first reunion) or grabbing him (Fearamid fight, end credits). Touch aversion may explain his visceral reaction to Bill violating his personal space with mock affection.

Ford appears more comfortable initiating than receiving touch, especially arms’-length nudges and shoulder touches; the kids’ surprise at his adorable tackle-hug suggests it’s uncharacteristic. He also expects a handshake when Fiddleford goes in for a hug, misreading his body language and cue to “come here.”

Stimming

The animation emphasizes Ford’s hands in all their six-fingered glory, giving him unique repetitive mannerisms that can be interpreted as stimming. These include rapping his fingers nervously over the journal (“The Last Mabelcorn”), rolling the DD&MD die, twirling his gun, and wiggling his fingers (narrating DD&MD, taunting Bill).

Pressure stimming could explain why Ford wears heavy clothes throughout his life. This comes to represent his guardedness, as he wears the fewest layers while content with Stan and Gravity Falls and the most while trusting no one, but it may have literally resulted from PTSD compounding his stimming so that he only feels safe weighted down. In the end he keeps the sweater, unburdened but still holding to that feeling of security. Likewise, Ford’s pattern of puffing his chest (especially in danger) may be a pressure stim to anchor himself, holding back the fear and weightlessness he feels inside.

Comfort objects

Ford has saved his coat and childhood photo of himself and Stan for over 30 years, suggesting a grounding attachment to them. He clearly shows a more-than-professional attachment to his journals, embracing his hands -his identity- through them even literally as he sleeps holding one to his heart (just as Bill starts toying with it). Writing in the journals is Ford’s coping mechanism when “I’m not sure I am who I am” and “I JUST DON’T KNOW ANYMORE”. That panicked “you don’t understand!” is putting it lightly.

Sensory issues

Ford has a pattern of shielding his ears in stressful situations: Bill whispering in his mind, his pre-fight argument with Stan, his nightmares, and his confrontation with Dipper. (“Everyone, plug your ears!” he demonstrates despite knowing the memory gun won’t affect him.) In addition to blocking noise under stress, his hands apparently ground him by clutching his coat, journal, and (during Stan’s amnesia) his neck and wrists stigmatized by the chains.

Contrast Ford fnord playing Bavarian Fire Drill with the agents and his dumbfounded response to the kids crowding him, and it’s clear he gets overwhelmed under pressure; Stan may have steered attention away from him for Ford’s comfort as much as his own. At the kids’ birthday we see that Ford has practice slipping out of crowds, literally relying on Stan for support when all eyes are on him.

Conversely, Ford shares many autistic people’s unusual tolerances or otherwise has difficulty communicating discomfort. Based on “cycloptopus roll” in the journal, Ford has no problem eating something Stan says “smells like if death could barf”. He tolerates heat when shaving with fire and wearing heavy clothes all the time (possibly to prevent sensory overload, as it’s always the same sweater unlike Mabel). Ford also shows only momentary discomfort being shot, knocked unconscious, crushed under rubble, chained, and electrocuted, which… same? “Stop thinking” and “focus on your intellect and control your fear” are exactly the self-regulation measures we develop to tolerate sensory overload.

Executive dysfunction

Autistic people often experience executive dysfunction due to our singlemindedness toward goals, which Ford exhibits in spades. He jumps into major decisions (sending Stan away both times, apprenticeship, quantum destabilizer) without thinking of setbacks or long-term consequences and resists changing plans (frustration at research roadblocks, inability to adjust opinions of Stan). His aggrieved “we just need to lay low and think of a plan” reflects a conscious difficulty with planning that negates his mental health.

Ford evidently subordinates his needs in pursuing goals, his rooms a mess in 1982 and 2012 as he wears out and sleeps in clothes desperately projecting his academic identity. Lighting his face on fire because “it’s much faster than shaving” resembles flawed shortcuts we use to maintain hygiene against executive dysfunction.

Meltdowns

Ford’s paranoid breakdown shows signs of involving meltdowns. In addition to his defensive body language, when Stan applies pressure Ford suddenly loses all patience, filter, and ability to articulate what “you don’t understand” (his suffering, what the journal means to him). Meltdowns stem from pain, and he’s “up against [and has] been through” more than enough.

I’ve seen Ford’s confrontation of Dipper interpreted as a panic attack before, and I think it can also read as a meltdown. First we see Ford’s spiraling mile-a-minute thoughts (while asleep), then he’s urgently demanding the rift and yelling defensively (“I was gonna say please, kid!”) -exactly how it feels when the walls close in and our words fall away. In appealing to Dipper’s rationality, Ford talks them both down.

Ford has also hurt himself under stress, punching the blackboard and his head (while cursing his metal plate in the finale).

Difficulty reading social cues

“I haven’t been in this dimension for a really long time” = Ford’s A+ excuse for not knowing if it’s “still” normal for kids to say “greetings” or have weapons, when ironically it never was. He also thinks mind control can be used “responsibly”, presumably with consent as Bill normalized to him before.

For all of Ford’s insecurities about how people perceive him, he’s often oblivious to it. He doesn’t register Dipper’s unease at him shaving with fire, being unsure the aliens are dead, or jumping with the magnet gun. He brushes off Stan saying “he’s lost his mind”, then meets his demands for thanks with a blunt “what?” -for once more confused than angry. Based on his awkward laughter before a girl throws punch on him at prom, it seems Ford’s lack of social skills contributed to his difficulty making friends growing up.

Empathy

Autistic people often experience unusually high or low empathy, even fluctuating between both; Ford evidently lacks and/or suppresses empathy in his fight with Stan, the person closest to him. Without intending harm he jumps to conclusions and won’t hear Stan’s side, thinks tactlessly appealing to their sailing dream or giving Stan until the end of the summer will incentivize him leaving, and does not realize Stan is homeless until called on it. Ford often displays the autistic tendency to speak without a filter - he’s right that codependency stifles individuality, but calling it “suffocating”? Blunt as a left-hook. Perhaps Bill ensnared him promising a relationship of shared interests where he’d sooner decode ciphers than emotions.

There’s a case for Ford being hyperempathetic with difficulty expressing it. He makes half-steps toward reconciliation that only anger Stan more: offering to share his fun with DD&MD, fixing the lightbulb, giving Dipper the mind control tie to help Stan win the election. One standout response is his sincere laughter at Stan’s “my brain isn’t good for anything”: he knows the feeling, but it sounds absurd coming from a socially adept person he values, so he affirms Stan’s worth by intuitively treating this statement like the joke it is.

Whether sympathy or empathy, Ford’s care for others shines through his concerted effort to seem aloof and cut them off. He repeats “I’m sorry Fiddleford” in his mind nonstop, his tale recounting the insensitive things he said but not how he desperately held Fiddleford in the unfiltered later flashback. He relates to Dipper’s interests, insecurities, and drive enough to hastily propose “a dream come true”. He knows exactly how to reassure Mabel without even knowing how the unicorns affected her, thinking she’ll be fine alone because her “magnetic personality” ranges beyond his weirdness magnetism.

Above all, Ford shows uncommon agape toward anomalies and all mankind. Even after their falling-out, Fiddleford affirms that Ford only wanted to help a world so often unkind to him.

Language

Ford displays many autistic speech patterns, such as declarative statements and an odd mix of formal and colloquial speech (“not with a bang but with a… boop-boop”, “the symbols needn’t all be literal, Dipper. It just has to be someone cool in the face of danger”). We often suspend the point of sentences with context for fear of misunderstanding, sometimes creating more (“when fighting a Gremloblin, use water”, anyone?) Ford shares our related tendency to get overly precise, second-guessing the correctness of everything he says (“or you could just roll an eight”, “floppy disks, and 8-tracks… right?”, “sometimes the strangest things in the world are right under our noses… and our feet, in this particular instance”). In the last example, Ford mixes his metaphor by understanding it better literally.

Ford has a sense of humor familiar to many autistic people, which includes indulging humor to himself (in the journals) instead of strictly sharing it. He shares our penchant for puns (“he’s gourd-geous!”, “one giant headache!”) and double meanings (“someone cool”, “the most peculiar dream”). Ford characteristically makes deadpan remarks (“just going to ignore that”, “so this is an emergency”, “I did mention that the fate of the universe is at stake, didn’t I?”, “NLOO PH SOHDVH”) but draws the line at mockery (“he doesn’t make fun of me all the time the way you and Grunkle Stan do”) - many of us concur, for hyperempathy or knowing how it feels.

He also invents his own secret languages… nuff said.

Infodumping

Does a whole book of exposition count? “Lost prehistoric life forms!” and “Mesoamerican gold!” and “Pirate ghosts!” are the words of a child with no filter about sharing everything interesting he’s read, and the journals are punctuated with equal enthusiasm. Then there’s his “cutting-edge programs and multi-dimensional paradigm theory!” ramble, DD&MD and magnet gun facts, and hostile takeover of Stan’s role as exposition fairy; Mabel’s unicorn hair quest only happens because Ford goes on a tangent about it.

Infodumping is also the only sensible explanation for why Ford mentions the barrier equation. Besides self-endangerment. Bill got under Ford’s skin not by promising power, but regression to a friendship where he felt safe sharing what he loved.

Literal/logical thinking

Ford emphatically takes things at face value. He feels compelled to defensively answer absurd questions like “Is there an owl in this bag?” and “The world’s most confusing game of hopscotch?” Ford is earnest to a fault, walking into Stan’s conversational traps by nerding out about what he loves; like many autistic people, he instinctively says what he means and assumes everyone else works the same way. This makes him terrible at subterfuge: barely tricking the agents under amnesia, blurting out acknowledgment of the kids and barrier equation to Bill, and delivering a stilted “don’t do it, Ford, it’ll destroy the universe!” as “Stan” (who plays him much more convincingly after 30 years’ practice). Correcting Stan’s grammar to get back at him, Ford cannot tolerate incorrectness in language or behavior.

Logical thinking leads Ford to black-and-white views of people and situations - most self-destructively, “TRUST NO ONE”. He assumes malice due to difficulty factoring in others’ emotions or miscommunication. “You did this because you couldn’t handle me going to college on my own!″ is a logical statement based on true premises, but assumes that Stan acted rationally to sabotage Ford. Stan tactlessly making it about their sailing dream instead of apologizing only solidifies it. Growing up with someone who means well but can’t say what he means, and no frame of reference for friendship outside codependency, it’s no wonder “a being with answers” worms his way into Ford’s mind and poisons it.

If you’ve followed these autistic heuristics thus far, that brings us to…

Special interests (or, why Ford’s autistic narrative matters)

First, honorable mention to Dungeons, Dungeons, & More Dungeons: after 30 years away he drops world-saving work to play it, quotes it from memory, and shares encyclopedic knowledge (“Prime-statistical anomalies over 37 but not exceeding 51!”, “The Impossibeast! Hey, I thought they banned this character!”)

And of course, mocking its fantastical monetary system!!! is a hatecrime unto his soul. (“At least I’m not all keyed up to watch a kids’ show”, he says with no qualms enjoying “Giggle Time Bouncy Boots” and other “childish” things; the threat of infantilization is real so he projects it back.)

Now, the big one: Ford’s singular, intense interest in anomalies drives the development of his career, art, and very identity.

“As if his abnormally high IQ wasn’t enough, he also had a rare birth defect: six fingers on each hand. Which might have explained his obsession with sci-fi mystery weirdness.” I have argued that Ford’s ostracism cannot solely explain his patterns of abnormal behavior; now I propose that Ford’s autism and polydactyly are twin anomalies defining his central arc of alienation and belonging. Both constitute an experience unrelatable beyond reference to his peers, beyond words except those he’s internalized as their self-narrating zoo exhibit: “I am a freak.” But when Ford’s mirroring of Stan breaks down, when he accepts he can’t be normal and embraces it, finding a place “where weirdos like me fit in” lights up his eyes and world.

His light only falters knowing that indeed, “his abnormally high IQ wasn’t enough” for most of the world. Like many autistic people, Ford is labeled “gifted”: a state where his passion becomes “our ticket out of this dump”, “I worked so hard!” a basis for worth. “In a place like that, I had to work twice as hard” hits different for all of us who’ve had to be the perfect savant to justify our existence. We get to thinking that we have to save the world, that if people mistreat us it’s because we didn’t perform enough exceptionalism to deserve better. But if someone is dedicated to dehumanizing you, trying to prove them wrong means absorbing the idea they could be right.

It’s in this state that Ford absorbs Bill and vice versa. Bill repeats what everyone says about Ford’s intelligence, but without making him “earn” it until enough frog-boiling that “smart guy” or “IQ” become his identity - for Bill to give as easily as take away. Bill exploits Ford’s need for companionship he shouldn’t have to “earn”, then insidiously reinforces the idea he does. And Bill betrays Ford, Bill abuses Ford, Bill others Ford through the interests he pretended to support, Bill causes Ford to trust no one because Ford can see him in everyone. Autistic people know this demon well, whether it’s a person or our internalizing voice or both, but it’s as inexplicable to the allistic world as the quiet violence we endure every day - voiceless yet present as the journal’s disappearing ink.

Ford’s consuming need for people to be what they seem and say what they mean culminates in the dramatic irony that he doesn’t hear Stan (never what he seems) say “I didn’t mean it!” Instead he only hears “it”, one of the worst things an autistic person can hear: he’s not the brother Stan wanted him to be and his “dumb mysteries” -his identity- prevent him from loving his family correctly. For him and so many of us, these are the last words before abjection into nothing.

…until they aren’t. Until Ford returns, driven underground but emerging when Dipper shares his light. Until the dramatic irony that Ford blaming himself for Bill’s abuse and lamenting how “easy” it was absolves him to both characters and audience, who see it for the injustice it is. Until his abuser’s final threat is to violate his mind and weirdness magnetism with it (sound familiar?) and Ford heroically guards both. Until Ford and Stan can finally step into each other’s shoes, finally validate unacknowledged experiences of abuse. That’s when Ford regains trust - when Stan’s actions speak louder than words (from him or his dark mirror, Bill) and Ford finally hears he’s worthy of love without having to give any part of himself in return.

Most importantly: Ford only embraces his special interest, only advocates acceptance of his difference with more dignity as he asks Stan for a second chance they both know he deserves. Ford doesn’t have to change who he is and the narrative rewards him for it. He doesn’t have to be “grateful” as if his life’s worth is a debt; any notion that he “owes” his gifts to anyone burns with the journals. He doesn’t have to fight back even when it seems impossible and do those things the world said he never could (but damn he delivers anyway). He only has to realize he can’t and doesn’t have to expect perfection from anyone, most of all himself, to find belonging.

The Mystery in the Mystery Shack is not a puzzle to be solved. He’s a complexity of infinite sides and infinite outcomes. This reading of his story matters because we matter; his narrative speaks to an unspoken desperation and self-actualization we know ineffably. Like any marginalized group, autistic people deserve better than abjection or exploitation or conditional acceptance based on “respectability” or what we can do for others. We deserve to reclaim the stories where we see the patterns of our lives - whether in the text’s words or 3k of our own. Until the rest of the world does its part in changing for us, we’ll carve out our own belonging wherever weirdness magnetism draws us; we’ll find our own Gravity Falls.

Things that drive me insane is when ppl want sam to be the innocent normal one with less trauma and in the process completely brush off azazel's entire csa coded storyline + demons trying to kidnap and groom sam. Sorry it's just kinda sorta upsetting when you take Sam's feeling of being unclean and dirty and needing to run away to establish some ounce of control in his life and make it only about john abusing dean. It's kinda wretched actually.

You can be lovingly assertive.

For a lot of my life I associated assertiveness with abusive personalities- as a sort of warning sign of violence to come. But that's not right: we need to have the courage to defend ourselves. Sometimes assholes just get ahold of that power and misuse it.

There is a happy medium between saying "Shut up, you're a piece of shit and I'm going to do what I want" and letting people walk all over you.

You can enforce your boundaries and refuse to accept mistreatment and disrespect without being verbally demeaning. If you don't speak up and let people know when they cross your lines, though, you can be taken advantage of. You owe it to yourself to fight in your corner, and for the benefit of everyone involved. It doesn't make you an asshole to say that the way you are being treated is not okay. You're an asshole when you use disrespect and your own anger as an excuse to say things to hurt others more than the situation demands.

It doesn't matter if you piss others off for standing up for yourself, and for what is true. Anyone who wants to hate you for protecting yourself is invariably an asshole.

You can stand up for what is right and kind, even if everyone around you hates you for it, and you can do it in a firm, loving way. Assertiveness is not abusiveness.

Can my miracle please be for my father to divorce his abusive wife

Reblog for a miracle to happen tonight

gay trans man in danger with abusive ex

PLEASE HELP (tl;dr at the bottom for the love of god please i know it’s obnoxious but please don’t ignore this)

i remade the post from the other day because it seemed like the severity of my situation wasn’t quite clear bc i didn’t wanna type up paragraphs for why i need help

for awhile now i’ve been trying to leave my straight ex boyfriend of over 11 years. but because it took me as long as it did due to the pandemic to get everything together, he has been leeching away my money, prolonging my stay, but i cannot take it anymore.

i have everything in order; i’m going to re-apply for disability and get health insurance and a lawyer bc let’s face it i’ll need one so they finally realize i’m Certified Disabled.

i’ve tossed the idea of apartment hunting and applying to hunching down and going through section 8 for whatever i can get. i have a working car i just need street legal.

—

i’ve helped him pay bills for this house after brutal emotional and physical abuse but if i can raise enough money to get out and FAST, i will finally be able to breathe a little easier and start to heal.

i have two children i’ll be taking with me. if not for some random e-beggar please help my children.

getting on my feet with housing, car insurance.. wont be cheap i know. i’m sorry this is long i’m so ashamed but anything ANYTHING helps…

paypal (preferred but obv i’m not picky!!!): imposterwarp@gmail.com

venmo: kashebu

cashapp: $sinisterspiral

thank you please boost and DON’T LIKE if you can help it, as it adds to the notes, which is more likely to make people think i’m okay

cw incest, stalking, breach of privacy, SA

Please help me. i found out my brother (who lives in the same house has me) Has been accessing my private information, including my bank account and my google photos, which contain several compromising photos of me. He has also created a secret folder in my accoubt which Cannot be accessed through any devices owned by me. My Own Shit. And I have proof of him accessing, altering, deleting, and obfuscating information and data. The internet connection here is not reliable for me. I CANNOT LIVE HERE. I AM AFRAID. And i am keeping quiet in order to avoid a major blowout in this house but I have been on the brink of suicide and he is aware of the effects these actions have on me. I am desperate to get far, far, far away from here. I am so tired of feeling unsafe.

vm/paypal.me/: tominova

I am so profoundly alone and just. despondent. I can't keep taking this

might be a bit odd or a stretch and written poorly by me (sorry if its rambly basically) but mithrun has such interesting but devastating symbolism and importance for a message in dunmeshi.

(TW SA/ABUSE MENTIONS)

the goat (demon) being an abusive relationship that to you who is in it only sees a nice perfect person doing anything for you, only for things to slowly get worse and worse… leading to SA (it’s not actual SA but the imagery has subtle implications of it) and other forms of physical and psychological abuse.

this leaving mithrun in an intense state of depression, ptsd and other issues like getting mana sickness really easily, which is also connected to the physical disabilities he got from said abuse. and due to these states he finds he can not desire anything anymore, he can only feel empty, not even a desire to get help and only feels a strong anger to the person and tries to prevent anyone else from going through the same.

but he’s not a lost cause.

“so.. even vegetable scraps have their uses, huh?”

he blames himself for his trauma, he sees himself as worthless and not one to be desired anymore because of what he went through. and realizing this, realizing that he actually has grown a desire to BE desired even just in a simple way to be needed (helping with falin) he finally can crack through that depression. the ptsd is still there, the physical disabilities are still there, but through surrounding himself with community of people with different views and trauma has helped him realize he is not broken and shouldn’t be blaming himself for something that was out of his control.

he wants to do new things, he wants to live now and it’s so beautiful to see.

plus, as kabru says here how the desires being eaten is not what it seems like is such an interesting fact. sure the demon ate his desires he had in that moment, making him believe he could never desire again but in fact he could get new desires (change/grow/heal) plus, traveling with kabru, he did show desires whether they be small or not.

in this moment he showed full horror about this memory. now if he was loss of desire, then he shouldn’t even desire to feel fear about this right? shouldn’t he only feel anger due to the revenge? which once again, shows his whole healing journey.

he’s such a great character with so much representation, and in turn is also a character that can show hope for someone like thistle who now is going through similar things and is practically hospitalized.

there is hope, you will heal, you are gonna be okay and your trauma is real but it does not shape you as a person, you are safe now.

dunmeshi is such a great depiction of that

I always thought it was weird that Hancock's drug addiction (or at least dependency) was never addressed.

And honestly I just look to fanon to finish Danse's character arc and I forget that isnt canon

Although why do you say that Cait's backstory was fetishized? And why was Nick Valentine's quest messed up?

YOU FOOL, YOU'VE OPENED A DOOR YOU CANNOT CLOSE

I GUESS IT'S TIME FOR...

THE CAIT BREAKDOWN

(TRIGGER WARNINGS FOR S/A, ADDICTION, AND ABUSE)

Firstly, some ground rules. This is directed at a Certain Kind of Contrarian, the kind of person who thinks characters are free-thinking entities with free will, who seemingly thinks they pop up fully formed out of the ground with no liberties taken by a writer. I need to preface this because these people always show up when discussing these kinds of characters.

We need to look at Cait in a Doyist lens. She is not a real person. Everything she does and went through was decided by her creators. It is a waste of time to justify something by saying well, this happens in real life, people go through this, people do this, because those actions and people are real. Cait is based in reality, but she herself is a puppet being pulled around with other puppets.

It can be viable to consider Cait in a Watsonian lens, but ultimately, we won't get anywhere picking her apart like that. Doing so would be taking her at face value, when Cait has a lot more going on behind the curtains. The Person and the Character Cait is, they're very different. One is a Person, the other is what decides that Person's personality, history, everything. Character comes first. You cannot defend Character by pointing at Person and saying that the Person exists in a world where anything is possible. Character comes first. Yes, Person exists, but Character defines it, and with Cait, we are discussing her Character.

We need to talk about the decisions made about Cait's Character, 'cause oh boy, ol' Beth really made some, didn't they?

FUCK UP 1: BETHESDA DOESN'T KNOW HOW TO HANDLE ADDICTION

Cait's Psycho use starts after killing her parents, and at some point, she becomes addicted. Later, as it starts negatively affecting her, even causing her cough up blood, she no longer views it as worth the high. Why did Cait start using, though?

Well, look at everything she had gone through. We'll get to how poorly her backstory itself is handled, and how lackadaisically Bethesda throws various traumas at her with all the grace and care of a small child throwing rocks at cars on the highway, but for now, we're focusing on the Psycho use.

Cait uses to cope with her trauma, that much is obvious. That's usually why characters and IRL people turn to substances. The issue here is how Bethesda treats both the use, and the...fuck, is it fair to call that fucking chair recovery?

The chair. That Fucking Chair.

I wanted an option to say nope, we're not doing this to you, we're leaving. But...no. The actual solution to Cait's 20+ years of trauma was to lock her in an interrogation chair and have her tortured for a few minutes.

Okay. Let's discuss this.

Cait used Psycho seemingly as a way to both punish herself and never think about the shit she went through. Psycho makes the user aggressive, so it stands to reason, also cruel and capable of using that aggression. Perhaps Psycho influenced her feelings at any moment, allowing her to not care about killing her parents, or about her slavery. Either way, Cait is already being hurt, and it very much is self-harm.

So, the solution, the thing to help Cait, get her on the first step to recovery from both her trauma and her addiction, is to hurt her. Punish her. It very much reads like punishment, you are locked into a chair. She sits there whimpering in pain. Now, this makes sense for Vault Tec and their experiment with this vault.

But...as the end of Cait's arc?

We're getting into some potentially controversial territory, but...it's proven, time and time again, that compassion and sufficient resources are the best, and pretty much the only, way for an addict to recover. It isn't enough to just stop using, get off it. You have to address the circumstances that lead to the addiction. Yes, some people will choose not to stop using, they'll choose to remain addicted and never attempt to get help for their issues. But that doesn't mean the ones who want to shouldn't get the opportunity. And those opportunities need to be compassionate.

A TORTURE CHAIR IS NOT COMPASSIONATE.

It reads as a scare tactic. Don't do drugs, kiddies, or else you'll get so bad, you'll have to be locked into a chair and get tubes and needles attached to you, and be tortured for a few minutes. Jesus H Christ.

You know what makes this even worse? The blatant condemnation and mockery of actual recovery. The AA meeting in the overseer's room, in that vault? Bethesda makes a joke of it! Cait calls it bullshit! Motherfucker, AA meetings are one of, if not the, most effective ways to keep someone off a substance! It gives people a community, an echo chamber reminding them how bad their circumstances were and how much better they are without their substance. AA meetings are crucial for addicts, and Bethesda mocks it, criticizes it as stupid, and then portrays torture as the solution. They do this with their addicted character. You are supposed hear Cait call it stupid, ineffective, a waste of time. That is so fucking irresponsible.

Here's the obvious answer as to how Cait's addiction should have been handled; Cait herself either mentions wanting to come off it, or the Sole Survivor intervenes and suggests she stop using. From there, the Sole Survivor acts as a sponsor, or just a friend keeping an eye on her. Y'know, how substance recovery actually works?

Yes, it's not that easy IRL, and it doesn't have to be in game, she can relapse, even. But whatever happens, you cannot address a trauma-based drug addiction with more trauma being the cure. Holy shit, dude.

FUCK UP 2: BETHESDA STUCK EVERY TRAUMA TAIL ON THIS DONKEY

Cait's backstory is bloated with every kind of trauma, and it reads as very...last minute?

Actually look at it. She was grotesquely abused for 18 years, sold into slavery for a few more years, killed her parents, got a drug addiction, and then basically enslaved in a fighting pit for a few more years as a means of a suicide attempt, and then she gets traumatized when she gets clean because, again, that chair literally tortures her.

Starting at the beginning...why did her parents wait until she was 18 to sell her? Would the slavers not take kids? Did her parents not want her being raped underage, for some reason? Why 18, specifically?

Because Bethesda are cowards, and I mean that. They wanted all the abuse and trauma for Cait they could get, but...child rape? That was a little far for them.

Rule 1 of writing dark shit: If you, at any point, feel like you've gone too far, back the fuck up. Don't start walking left instead of forward. Bethesda wanted her nightmare upbringing, but child rape bothered them. So, they just had her sold at 18, but that's incredibly contrived. Hey, Beth? If it bothered you, you shouldn't have gone near it. Skirting the topic is a cowardly writer's way out. Shit or get off the pot.

Now, you can write a character with this much trauma. You just have to actually handle it.

Cait should be way more unhinged. You should be able to look at her, speak to her once, and figure out oh, this woman has been through hell. Instead, Cait is surprisingly well-adjusted. She's a little rude and doesn't care much for good-guy morality.

Here's where those Contrarians come in, saying "People don't have to act like their trauma!" They don't. But those are real people. Cait was made, and she was made with a normal personality and a horrifically detailed nightmare origin story. It isn't that Cait just powered through and got out okay despite all odds, it's that Bethesda didn't fully think about how her trauma would actually affect her.

If anyone played Silent Hill 2, remember Angela Orosco? She was also incredibly abused and mistreated all her life, and actually, her story is remarkably similar to Cait's in every way. And Angela, she acts like a person who's been traumatized at every single turn. Watching Angela is heartbreaking even if you don't know what she's gone through, because you can tell there was something.

Cait's backstory could be significantly pared down. Again, the dialogue and 4 affinities talk system butcher the character arc, but Cait suffered the most, I think. She tells you about all of her trauma at once, in her second affinity. Second. Other characters talk about their most intense/emotional shit at the final talk, but because Cait's third talk needs to start Benign Intervention, and her final talk needs to be about being clean now, they have to rush through her trauma at the second one.

For Cait, I think it'd be better to pare down the trauma, but it could work to just...move her opening up about it to the final talk. That makes the most sense, her explaining how she got that way.

Also, why was it Cait that got all of this?

No, really, why was Cait selected to be the trauma donkey de jour?

She's one of 3 female companions. Piper and Curie's trauma is both their dads died. Cait's trauma is endless rape, beating, drug addictions, slavery, and fights to the death. She sticks out. It's like the other girls got nothing so Cait got everything.

Cait is compared to Cassidy from New Vegas, but...why? Cassidy got off nice and easy compared to Cait. Everyone gets off easy compared to Cait. It's like she's the heaviest thing in the room, the odd one out because she's gone through significantly more and worse than anyone else. Can you seriously compare Cait to anyone in Fallout 4? MacCready lost his wife, Cait was raped for years on end. Hancock feels guilty for not doing more in his younger years to help people, Cait was constantly beaten and tortured by her parents for her entire life. Nick has some identity issues and body dysmorphia, Cait killed her parents and now is always attempting suicide via bare-knuckle combat for the same people who raped her.

It's like she was meant for a different game. I could easily see her in say, Wasteland 3, or the other Fallouts, which had much darker tones. Everyone else in 4 is lighter to slightly darker shades of grey, and then Cait is pitch black.

I especially find this suspicious, given that Cait is the addict character. No, it's not Hancock, because Hancock's addiction isn't addressed, it's just...seasoning, some texture thrown on top. His addiction doesn't matter, by the game's standards, you're not supposed to care about it. Cait, you are. She's the addict character.

It's like...weirdly implied that it's only incredibly fucked up stuff that makes you an addict. Like, there's a certain bar of trauma you have to have before you start using. First of all, incorrect, grossly so. Secondly, patronizing as shit. Thirdly, if you think like this, you shouldn't be allowed to write anything. Ever. Or vote, for that matter.

FUCK UP 3: THE IRISH SHIT

I will not bring up the accent, beyond that it, specifically, is pretty obnoxious. Katy Townsend, her voice actor, is Scottish, but...the accent is bad enough, I was sure she was American. Listening to this video, you can hear her natural speaking voice, and it's nowhere near Cait's thick, caricature Tough Irish Gal voice.

I have previously described Cait as a 'too many cooks in the kitchen' scenario. On one hand, she's a Trauma Donkey, as described in the last section. On another, she's a haha funny Irish lady love booze and fighting, ain't nothing better than getting pissed and picking a fight, am i right!

I have a theory that Cait was two separate characters that was merged into one. Fallout 4 tries to represent/dickride Massachusetts culture and history, and Massachusetts has double the national Irish population. New York and New Hampshire are more Irish, but Massachusetts is still very Irish. So, Beth made an Irish character, but then, like, Frank down the hall wanted his sadgirl babe, and they got stuck together.

There is no bigger clash than a historical cruel/tragic cartoon caricature and the darkest, most horrific character in a story, and it's the same person in Fallout 4. Again, Cait can be Irish. She cannot be a Tough Irish Gal, while being everything else that she is.

HOW IS THIS FETISHIZED?

I mean...look at it. I should preface that I've been writing for, like, three hours and am Quickly Losing Steam, so this conclusion is not likely to be great

I've also described Cait as getting sprayed down with a pain hose. Just drenched in every kind of suffering imaginable. It's not handled properly, it's not addressed properly, it's just kind of there for you to figure out on your own. Another thing I've called Cait is Whedonesque, for Joss Whedon loves makes strong female characters, making them tiny, not-like-other-girls waifs (Cait is very thin and skinny), and then putting them through trauma, making them cry. He's been accused of making strong women just to see them break.

I don't fully think that last part applies to Cait, but it gets close. Cait is one of three girls. She's the only masculine/androgynous, Piper and Curie are both rather feminine, even if in different flavors. Cait is all tomboy, and she's all trauma and addiction, and misery. She falls into the Whedon trope of "I can kick ass but I need someone to fix me". Cait is, very much, a fixer fantasy. She's broken and desperate and Sole is supposed to be the white knight on a shining horse to save her, fix her. That's why she makes a big deal about how they're the first person to ever be nice to her. It's a fantasy.

And finally, Cait has something in common with the two other ladies; Piper exists to serve a plucky, girl-next-door romance (she's the intended romance, even, the one you're expected to pick), and Curie is a french virgin maid fantasy. Y'know Lusty Argonian Maid? Literally Curie.

And that is at least half of why Cait's Character was made the way it was. It's to appeal to a fixer fantasy. Even if unintentional, that's what Cait's character adds up to. Compare to 500 Days of Summer, if the movie wasn't self-aware.