Help Lmao - Tumblr Posts
I spent my morning on this Bleach & The Emperor’s New Groove crossover joke because it lived rent free in my head for too long. Wish you knew how I giggled while drawing it :А
for a tragedy the iliad is pretty funny. compiled some of my favorite things about it (not in chronological order)
- patroclus barely speaks for most of the book but EVERYBODY loves him. like he’s literally the entire greek camp’s precious meow meow. the ORIGINAL sweet little meow meow. even the GODS are sad and feel bad when he dies. even HOMER loves patroclus, always calling him “faultless patroclus” “my patroclus” “gentle patroclus” “sweet patroclus” WE GET IT. achilles, briseis, menelaus, ajax, literally every member of the greek camp is down ATROCIOUS for patroclus all bc he’s just one Really Nice Dude. just one very Sweet and Polite Fella. one Extra Special Guy <3 his whole narrative purpose is simply to be everyone’s special little scrunkly
- in one of the MANY passages where achilles is lamenting about how sad it is that patroclus is dead he promises patroclus’ corpse that he will have many deep-bosomed trojan and dardanian women weep for him. he tells his dead buddy “i will get the absolute THICKEST hoes with the BIGGEST mommy milkers for your funeral” honestly? id be honored
- all the arguments escalate so quickly. an old man very politely appeals to agamemnon to pretty please give his daughter back and offers him a huge fortune for her and agamemnon calls him a crotchety old bitch and tells him he’ll fucking kill him if he ever sees him again
- that same old man is a priest of apollo. you know, the plague god? anyway priest calls in a favor and apollo curses the greeks with a plague
- to address this, achilles decides to resolve it by calling all the greeks together and passive aggressively going “HM! i WONDER what could have caused a PLAGUE! it’s almost like we OFFENDED the PLAGUE GOD somehow. now WHAT could WE (cough agamemnon) done to offend the PLAGUE GOD?????” all in front of agamemnon
- zeus spends most of the book desperately trying to keep the gods OUT of the war. then once he’s finally had enough he just calls them all together and says “go nuts” and then they do
- artemis talks shit on the battlefield so hera calls her a bitch, steals her bow, and beats her with it. artemis then goes back to zeus and cries
- polydamas says to hector “hey you killed patroclus and achilles is gonna be fucking pissed. we should probably go back to the city while we can” and hector calls him a bitch and tells him to stfu. achilles then chases them back to the city and hector decides to stay outside and get killed by achilles instead of going in with the rest of the army bc he didn’t wanna hear polydamas say “i told you so”
- diomedes is about to fight with a guy called glaucus but then they realize their ancestors were friends or something so they decide not to kill each other, and diomedes says “hey! why don’t we even trade armor! :) just as a show of friendship! :))” and glaucus is like “yeah sure!” and gives diomedes his really nice gold plated armor while glaucus gets diomedes’ shitty plain bronze armor
- achilles makes a bitchy comment to his horses about leaving patroclus to die and the horse momentarily gains the ability to talk just to tell achilles it wasn’t THEIR goddamn fault, tells achilles he’s gonna die soon, and then goes back to being a normal horse.
- zeus with his daughters: oh child ❤️ oh my dear ❤️ oh there there i didn’t really mean it ❤️ sweetie why don’t you go help the greeks?❤️
- zeus with his sons: “ares you fucking donkey”
- everyone calling paris a stupid coward bitch every time they see him. all of troy fucking hates him. hector fucking hates him. helen fucking hates him.
- paris getting dressed up in fancy armor and prancing to the front lines going “i’ll fight ANY of you greeks!” and menelaus (the guy whose wife he stole) goes “alright bet” and paris nearly pisses his pants and tries to hide but then his brother hector calls him a piece of shit and tells him he hopes he dies and makes him fight menelaus. menelaus promptly ROCKS HIS SHIT. literally starts dragging him by his helmet like a rag doll, would’ve killed him if aphrodite hadn’t teleported paris outta there (BOO)
Do you ever think about a hot fictional character you want to marry (he is an old man) and then, twenty minutes later, figure out the meaning of life and decide that the choices you make don't matter, the only thing that matters is that you made a choice at all? I do.
lmao wtf
Hello i'm a normal person here's some stuff i drew to illustrate different traits different "person getting controlled" tropes can have
I'M SCARED OF YOU @dummyelf YOU LITTERALY LIKE MY POSTS 8 SECONDS AFTER I POST THEM 😰
I just put on a playthrough of CV1 as background noise for drawing and I have realized that I can tell exactly where this guy is in each level by sound effects alone. He just missed a secret chest.
im sry but every single time u give a surname example choi to the reader all i can think abt is some non asians saying their name 💀💀 choi sydney gn 💀💀
💀 this had me dead laughing lmaooo
it does feel a bit weird writing it since i know all my readers don't have asian names so it can get kinda funky 💀
maybe i should stop substituting surnames then and just y/n l/n like others do 💀
i’m literally just writing for eric & hyunjae at this point omg i am a wreck you guys
i just posted hyunjae, i have three eric drafts & one more hyunjae draft in the works oml i need to write for other people
Looking at nothing, thinking about everything...
College
I've been doing schoolwork that is not for marks for 5 hours. I have finals in a week, and I need to do 7 assignments for Sunday next week and finish 8 unit sections by THIS Sunday, I need to do two assignments by THIS Sunday, I start a nursing practicum in TWO WEEKS and I don't have have shoes for the practicum. I don't have money and I don't have a boyfriend and I don't have chingu and I can't watch k-dramas because I'm too busy. College is not fun but it's worth it. I just don't like the teacher a lot. Help Me.
I have this problem all the time 😭
It’s a very dangerous game scrolling through Tumblr in public when your whole feed is about teachers 😳
You are under arrest for being cutest
You-
I want justice
"everytime I think about my childhood my head hurts"
wow maybe it's because you're fighting layers of dissociative amnesia that were put there for a reason and you're thinking about things you aren't supposed to know
(this is a self callout)
i feel bad for not posting anything let alone ososan in a while so slaps this here
What boredom does to a mf
my friend named her Denise lmao it fits tbh
You’ve got a friend in me..
