Source: Incorrect Quotes Generator - Tumblr Posts

ENFJ: Treat spiders the way you want to be treated.

INFP: Killed without hesitation.

ENFJ: No

FFXV characters as incorrect quotes:

Noctis: Not trying to brag or anything, but I can wake up without an alarm clock now simply due to my crippling and overwhelming anxiety, so...

Regis: Well, well, well... if it isn’t my old friend: the dawning realization that I fucked up bad.

Prompto: Physically, yes, I could fight a bird. But emotionally? Imagine the toll.

Ignis: I was born for politics. I have great hair and I love lying.

Gladiolus: I’m sick and tired of being called 'mortal.' You don’t know that. Neither do I. I have never died even ONCE. Nothing has been proven yet. Stop making assumptions. It’s rude.

Iris, motioning to a Halloween display: All these ghosts! All these ghosts! I still can’t find a boo.

Lunafreya: You’ll have a hard time believing this because it never happens, but I made a mistake.

Cindy: If ya can’t beat ’em, dress better than ’em

Cid: I’ve come to a point in my life where I need a stronger word than fuck

Aranea: Some of you may die, but that’s a sacrifice I’m willing to make.

Cor: What doesn't kill me should run, because now I'm fucking pissed.

Ardyn: You seem familiar, have I threatened you before?

Ravus: Fool me once, I’m gonna kill you

Bonus- the Astrals:

them: I’d like to offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals.

nico: will... why did you draw a pentagram on the floor?

will: your text told me to satanize the house before you returned

nico:

nico: i wrote sanitize, will.

Ares: If you bite it and you die, it’s poisonous. If it bites you and you die, it’s venomous.

Hephaestus : What if it bites me and it dies!?

Hades: Then you’re poisonous. Jesus Christ, Hephaestus , learn to listen.

Apollo: What if it bites itself and I die?

Poseidon: That’s voodoo.

Zeus: What if it bites me and someone else dies?

Hephaestus: That’s correlation, not causation.

Poisodeon: What if we bite each other, and neither of us die?

Apollo: That’s kinky.

Ares: Oh my God.

*Bullying Prevention Day*

McGonagall: Mary , what would you do if one of your classmates viciously teased you again and again?

Mary: Oh, that’s easy. I’d take a pencil out of my pencil case—

McGonagall: To write something to your teacher?

Mary : —make sure that it’s really sharp, and ram it into their eye at full tilt! My mom always says the pencil is mightier than the sword because they can’t outlaw bringing pencils to school!

McGonagall:

The rest of the class:

Lily: *whispering to Marlene* I think I’m in love with Mary

Take these random incorrect quotes with Dash and Five. :'D 🖤💙❤️

Dash: I was arrested for being too cool.

Five: The charges were dropped due to a lack of supporting evidence.

Dash: Must be hard not being able to laugh.

Five: I do have a sense of humor you know.

Dash: I've never heard you laugh before.

Five: I've never heard you say anything funny.

Dash: I can explain.

Five: Can you?

Dash: ...If you give me thirty seconds to think of a lie.

Dash: Don’t worry, I have a permit.

Five: This says “I can do whatever I want.”

Dash: Exactly.

Dash: I poisoned one of our glasses...

Dash: ...but I forgot which one.

Five: The way this is going I hope it's mine.

Divider credit: angels-aesthetic