Tony: Did You Know That When Spiders Mate, The Female Usually Eats The Male

Tony: did you know that when spiders mate, the female usually eats the male

Natasha:

Natasha: I was aware in grade 8.

Closed until further notice

Villain: *Kills Y/N*

Avengers: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Y/N: *respawns*

Villain: Wtf-

Y/N: Jokes on you, due to Covid-19, hell is closed until further notice. Hela apologised for the incovenience.

Michelle Jones x Reader WIP

You walked into homecoming, searching for your wonderful girlfriend. 'Wonderful' as in as soon as you made eye contact with her, she gave you a giddy smile and pulled out her middle finger. 

Rolling your eyes playfully, you lightly jogged up to Michelle. 

"Hey, loser," Stifling a scoff you quickly shot back with your lamest attempt at trash-talking, "You're the loser." Mj raised an eyebrow at your antics. "Hm, alright. But just shut up and leave here with me," You hummed softly, brushing some of her frizzy hair behind her ear. 

"Alright… Loser."

No trespassing or Wanda will kick you half way across New Jersey

Spideychelle Valentines day WIP #2

This one's really short

"HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY!" Peter ran up to Michelle on the sidewalk. She was currently walking to school, today had been an occasion of shitty events... It was only 7:20.

First, she wakes up late to an empty house, no clean T-shirts and no butter left. Because she woke up late, she was then late for the bus which was supposed to take her to the drug store to get Peter something. But now, Mj had no time and had to get to school.

I guess the Spiderman drawing she made him would have to do justice till she got to the store.

So, with the painfully uneventful day, that one little hug from behind lit up her path and she was so glad.

Peter kissed her cheek hesitantly. It was their first valentines day after dating for a couple of months, he didn't want to make her uncomfortable.

Soon they were walking on the same path. "Happy Valentine's day," Michelle took his hand in hers gently, her thumb running over his knuckles impulsively. That always gave him little butterflies.

"I got you something," he smiled at her as they walked. Gosh, Peter's such a sap it sweetly sickened her. "I got you something too... Well, made something, really," Michelle was scared he'd like something that he could use... Or, I guess, eat...

"You made me something?" Peter jumped up in excitement, definitely not the reaction Michelle was expecting but it made all her worries about the gift go away.

"Uh- yeah, it's just a drawing," She shrugged, not thinking it was that big of a deal. "It's of you, well, as spiderman but your mask is off," Peter gripped her hand tighter. "Why is my mask off?" His soft voice soft arrows through Mj's heart. "I like your face better," She just smiled awkwardly at him.

Neither of them have been with someone for Valentine's day, so, it was cute watching Peter blush at her sudden comments.

"I was going to get you something else, but I missed the bus this morning..." They inched closer together instinctively. "I think it's better when you make me something," Peter looked down, attempting to hide his bright cheeks. Michelle simply hummed, acknowledging that what she did was a good idea but not trying to make the celebration of making Peter happy in her head come out.

It was only 7:40, but this had definitely been the best day with him yet.