Of Course Brad Backed It Up. He Backed Like No One. Helloooo! What Gay Wouldnt Die Without A Phone?

Of course Brad backed it up. He backed like no one. Helloooo! What gay wouldn’t die without a phone?

Chris then informed his boyfriend he was referring to their VW Cabriolet in their driveway.

Brad paused for a moment to soak it all in. “Chris, did you want to stick it in?”

He did.

“It wasn’t the most ridiculous thing out there. Far from it.”

Brad then reminded Becky so far, the plan for human survival was a cave full of seeds in Iceland and some bunkers in New Zealand built by paranoid rich people with guns. He then restruck the pose.

“Now, what exactly did Becky have to say about the ‘outfit’ again? You know what, it doesn’t matter as no one needs to compete with zero coordination.”

Brad then turned to face Becky directly. “People go to jail for not having an emergency plan. What’s really messed up is nothing exists at the top level for all of us. Why was the human species as a whole so whacked anyway?”

Becky offered to get the next round of margaritas and motioned for Brad to rejoin his place in the cabana. Chris piped in to make them doubles then asked everyone where they should take that conversation. It was a pool day, the snarky could be tabled.

Brad thought it should go to Boise. Chris thought to shuffle it off to Buffalo citing his own disappointment in it’s obviousness. Becky didn’t know where to put it but thought enough to store it in Namibia. It was dry and sparsely populated so would preserve well.

She then guessed a doomsay plan could pass through countless generations unnoticed and undisturbed like Ring Around the Rosie. The coding on that was a bit whacked as the message did not make the impact it could have given it’s significance and pertinence to current global epidemics.

“It was from the Middle Ages so certainly credit could be given there. Did we need to attach trauma to children? It is safe to say there were no guns pointed at anyone.”

Becky went on to state the plague and assumed apocalypse remained daunting. To clear the way for the rest of their pool day while the larger whole got it’s act together, she suggested a temporary placeholder in lieu of a true master plan for the survival of the human species.

“It would need to be super simple and as close to universal as possible. Maybe a song is a good idea. Could we at least say, ‘Don’t panic.’ or ‘Florida is underwater. Think Nepal, not Naples.’

Becky took a sip of a now nearly toasted margarita.

“Of course, people would freak anyway, especially after discovering there was no master plan. It may though give us a moment of clarity before the madness where one out of 8 billion of us might just come up with a resolution.”

Becky further dove in the point explaining the problem even with her suggestions around all this lies exactly where it does in general, surfacing the best idea.

“The car alarm, censor/chat bots, a war on drugs, phone trees, microbeads in soap, beef hamburgers and the electric chair were lauded as genius at one juncture. The fact is the list is infinite, and we know better now. The more hoopla made over something, the more it felt like there was reason to question it.”

Becky then mentioned all the gimmicks around AI. “We really do not know what we are stepping into or better said, already have. For some time, no regulation existed around any of it. AI also did not automatically keep records in the same capacity as with previous technological advances. This was scary.”

All three were already well aware Brad and Chris’ issues with Tumblr stemmed out of bots and a culture difficult to interpret other than hellbent on efficiency and profit ironically at any cost to its own customers.

In an unrealized interruption, Brad interjected his shock, “I so did not associate the censorship with AI until now. That’s…. OMG. I mean… Look at the damage being done to the gay community alone. I didn’t place it. That hardly makes it any less real or hard hitting.”

Becky assured Brad in his reaction and offered some perspective as to what Brad and Chris faced. “There is not sufficient law, social construct, personal protection or compensation around AI. Overall, corporations and those of resource thus far have chosen censorship, ignorance, and to look out for themselves.”

She paused to readjust her composure into a near stand on her knees.

“That IS fear culture. Process exceeds person across the board here, and in the grand scheme everyone loses. You are literally taking the brunt here with your blog bradandchris.com.”

Seeing things materialize for the two, Becky switched gears quickly. “I say keep going. The Oregon Trail didn’t pop up out of nowhere. If you look around, you are not the only gays on the block either. Start your own thing or grind away just as the bots do to you. Eventually people pick up mirroring which is why we all do it where conversations can’t or do not happen for whatever reason.”

Becky scanned the pool looking for their server before returning her attention to Brad and Chris.

“To mirrors, why don’t you start Twittering? Musk is also weary of AI. You might find a home there. It would not hurt to try.”

Brad and Chris appreciated options and the former nodded in affirmation. The each knew they were not helpless, but not unaware any move required significant resources or losses.

As to her suggestion as to where to temporarily store the conversation of a need for master plan for a global emergency, Becky affirmed her choice in Africa. Humanity began on the very same soil, and the entire continent was bothering enough to take time for introspection.

She lived in South Africa for several years as a medical refugee from the United States Her insurance didn’t cover her condition and she needed to go somewhere cheap as well multicultural that came in English with a beach. It was that or Belize.

Chris who’d been quietly sunning at the edge of the cabana suddenly came to life. “Is that where ‘Please Belize’ came from? I’ve heard you say that and caught myself saying it. It’s mad addicting. I’ve tried to keep it to myself as I didn’t know what it meant. I forget to ask every time you are around. The last thing I need to do is offend more people out of the blue.”

Chris sat up to allow for his hands and arms to go full on Price is Right showcase. “I look really good in blue. Just look at my tiny swimmers.”

Becky nodded in affirmation took the last slip of the margarita in hand and motioned for the pool server that came into view to head their way. Satisfied they made contact and on their way over, she called Mars a ‘hellhole’ and reframed Twitter as a definite ‘maybe.’

She then mentioned she got her job assisting for Ralph Lauren after meeting him at the beach in Cape Town. That’s why she came back to the States. Her her stint abroad may also explain some oddities about her.

To bring everything full circle before the server arrived, Becky indicated her regret for using the Oregon Trail as an example. It wasn’t what she intended to say though she could not remember what that was. She pointed out while understandable as a selection, Boise left out half the population inclusive of herself, and that she didn’t know what a ‘shuffle’ was. It did not ring as something particularly evolutionary or bring much to her in terms of inspiration. It did remind her of apples for unknown reasons.

At the end of the day and to rest her case, it was fun to say Namibia.

“Namibia.”

Becky was so on her game.

"A brief?!? That's funny. I thought gold only came in a thong or g-string."

It was right then and there in the middle of shooting the remake of the Rocky Horror Picture Show, sponsored by T-Mobile's 5G full coverage network, Brad realized technology and innovation could actually backfire.

“How could the ‘T’ not stand for thong?!”

Brad couldn’t believe the producers were being serious. It turns out they were.

The Rocky Horror Picture Show (1975) // dir. Jim Sharman

Brad assured John his workout was next. Chris just went in the locker room to shower Peter.

Luke came back to Brad and Chris after conducting reconnaissance on the new guy.

Chris so called it.

He was all the same age, from Massachusetts, also an underwear model like Brad and Chris, and in the middle of a shoot as a body double for Macho Man the movie. He was playing the construction worker for the stripper scenes as the actor can’t keep his weight in check. Of all things, his name was Harry.

Brad then said he thought it would be almost funny if Harry’s last name was Lucille or Spotter.

The view was fine. More than fine actually. Brad and Chris would need to upgrade their hotel rooms more often.

About an hour later while all three laid in bed, their new friend, Chad would note the room key Brad and Chris had was for 909. They were in 606. How did they get inside?

Chris asked which time then notated the plant on the dresser was blinking. Brad said he had the same question and saw the little red light as well. At one point, he did think ‘reindeer’ and that now made sense. Such a thing never presented itself in the situation before.

Brad went on to say it would help if Chad was more specific as to this inside job. There was a lot of funky business going on in a relatively short period of time. Most of it was questionable. That was the fun.

Brad’s eyes went wide. He abruptly sat up and turned to Chad. “Streaming or recording?”

Chad flipped for a moment before realizing Brad and Chris didn’t care about being recorded. They cared to see it. Unfortunately, for them, he was streaming.

It was then and there Brad and Chris each got a text from their neighbor Luke. He happened to be on BBC and screenshot the whole thing. He would make a few quick gifs and shoot them over. To that, he couldn’t believe Chris’ hit the opposite wall.

Sure enough, it was true. All three were wondering where that pool of seaman landed. No one thought to look over AND up.

Luke said that made sense. When and where everyone and everything is going down it was understandable ‘up’ didn’t jump on the radar. The up part happened up front as it does.

True dat.