Tw: Ed

Tw: ed

Smoking and crying and trying not to throw up the musli bar I just ate

Tw: sh

I want to swallow the glass splinters that I am using for art right now. I want to to feel it cut open my throat and fill it with blood.

It just looks so crunchy. So tasty. Just made to be eaten. Just a tiny piece won't hurt, right?

i hate when i, a completely healthy person (very chronically ill), get sick (flare up) for no reason at all (i exerted myself way past my limit just cuz i didn’t wanna be “annoying”)

I want to spend a lazy day with someone.

And when I day someone I mean him.

Getting up late, I'll cook breakfast and wash the dishes while he watches YouTube or even better plays guitar and we are just lazy together.

Bathing together. Rubbing his back and braiding his hair while watching some stupid movie.

Baking together and telling each other off for eating thr dough. Little top of the head kisses and then I'll cook us a good dinner and when I clean he is there hugging me from behind.

We go to bed, maybe reading a boon to one another and just existing together.

Cuddling and living.

I think I need more social interactions, I just talked to a fly for 15 minutes. I just talked to it like:

Me: what are you doing here?

Fly: bzzzzzz

Me: you are so pretty, what a pretty fly you are!

Fly: bzzzzzz

So yeah, I think I really need to talk to humans again...

When I'm crying but he texts me and now I'm giggling and he makes me so happy that I'm crying again but it's good crying.