Shout Out To The People Who Never Had A Safe Place. Who Didnt Have A Before Trauma. Who Were Loved But

Shout out to the people who never had a safe place. Who didn’t have a before trauma. Who were loved but not protected. Who were collateral damage in someone else’s breakdown. Who got fucked up so young that they’ll never know who they could have been.

Shout out to people who’ve never felt safe. I hope you do someday.

First off, I didn’t call autistic people the problem. They aren’t. Just like people with NPD aren’t the problem.

Second of all, I know I have narcissistic tendencies. I have NPD. I’ve also been in therapy for four years so thank you for the astute observation that I need it. I’m also surrounded by non-narcissistic people that I talk to about things like this. My therapist being one of them.

Your statement about how you can have narcissistic traits and not narcissism is completely true. You can also have autistic traits and not be autistic.

Most mentally ill people have some degree of self centred tendencies. It’s critical to their survival. People with depression can get focused on their own misery and hurt people, people with bipolar disorder can act selfishly due to intense mood swings, people with autism can be unknowingly insensitive. It’s not an exclusive NPD experience.

I do view my narcissistic tendencies as impairing. Thank you so much for pointing out how a disorder is an obstacle to me. It very much is. It comes from years of trauma and abuse and it affects every aspect of my life negatively including my relationships, my sense of self and how I interact with the world.

I don’t think that someone’s parent having narcissistic traits is demonising me. Contrary to popular opinion, years of therapy and a deep interest in psychology can make even a narcissist self aware.

What is demonising is someone saying “my mother has narcissistic traits and therefore all people with any narcissistic traits and/or NPD are inherently awful people that I should purposefully trigger”. And I’m not making that comparison out of thin air. Anti-NPD is a tag and many websites specifically give you instructions on how to hurt narcissists and give mentally ill people crashes.

I try my best to take accountability. I fuck up. I hurt people. My narcissistic tendencies can cause harm to people when I don’t deal with them in a healthy way. Everyone fucks up. I just happen to do so more than others because of my “obstacles”.

So thank you for the lecture. And thank you for giving me the opportunity to clarify that saying “people have narcissistic traits” and saying “people with narcissistic traits are irredeemable monsters” are two very different things.

Love, your dear narcissist

“Oh but not all narcissists have NPD so I’m not really demonising you by calling every narcissist an irredeemable monster”

Fuck off. Just fuck off. That’s like saying not all autistic people have autism. It makes no sense and is completely redundant.

ok so you support the disabled, disordered, and mentally ill. but are you normal when someone takes long to respond to you? or if they have a hard time listening to you? when someone has a hard time giving you their attention? or when their manners aren’t perfect? or when someone makes mistakes that may be obvious or simple to you? or when someone talks loudly or “causes a scene?” are you normal when people have to think really hard to explain things? or when they have a hard time putting their thoughts into words?

are you normal when people’s hair is unkempt or oily or visibly unbrushed? or when their face might be full of acne? or when they don’t have deodorant on for one reason or another? how about if their clothes are dirty? 

are you normal about disabled/disordered/mentally ill people when they make you a little uncomfortable?

Reblog stuff if you want to not because some asshole on the internet is threatening you to

Physically disabled folks, tell me about your favorite disability aid(s)! Mobility aids, medication, strategies, apps, other disability aids, whatever helps you most/is your favorite.

Been seeing a lot of the bullshit about people with aspd/npd or low/no empathy again, so to combat that, I wanted to share a bit of positivity, so.

Things that are wonderful about my low empathy pals

Extremely perceptive

Almost impossible to freak out (great horror movie buddies)

Their ability to see through bullshit is unmatched

Immune to petty drama (unless it's funny)

Their sense of humour????????? The wildest, seriously

Perfect Poker Face

The ability to stay so calm in emergencies

Some of the least judgemental people I know (who knew rejecting social actually makes you more accepting of others? /sarcasm)

Some of the fiercest, most loyal and protective friends to those who have earned it

Unique and shrewd perspective on things because they're immune to guilt-tripping

Understand that actions, not thoughts, are the measure of a person's morality

Secretly the biggest animal lovers you'll ever meet

....and lots more things I didn't mention, but most importantly the most wonderful thing about aspd, npd, and low empathy people is that they are here, they are alive, and they are a beautiful expression of one of the many ways one can be human. They are just as capable of being good or evil as any other person is. If this is you, I want you to know I'm proud of you for surviving everything you've been through, especially the trauma and demonisation. You are worthy just as you are.

Please feel free to add anything I missed! Obviously not everything on this list is going to apply to everyone, since it's drawn from my own friendships and experiences, and everyone is unique, but that's half the point, isn't it?