Tony: On A Scale From 1 To 10, How Are You Feeling?

Tony: On a scale from 1 to 10, how are you feeling?

Peter: Well you know when you’re sleeping and your body does that fake falling thing?

Tony: I don’t see how that describes anything...

Peter: I know but I spent most of my afternoon thinking about that.

Tony:

Tony: I’m just gonna put a 3 again...

Tony, introducing Peter to the Avengers: Peter is our newest avenger, Spider-Man.

Steve: That’s a CHILD.

Peter: And that’s an ugly, pimply bitch.

Tony: Hey kid, you writing an essay or something?

Peter, typing out his Star Wars DR script: ...yes

Peter: Y’know, there is a more efficient way to answer someone on the phone when you really don’t wanna talk to them.

Peter: “Mario’s Pizzeria and Abortion Clinic, your loss is our sauce!”

Peter: And guess what, Nick Fury did stop calling after that!

Happy, having a stroke when Nick Fury appears on his phone afterwards:

Tony: So kid, anybody you like at school?

Peter: Well I sexually identify as a mistake so what does that say?

Tony: That says “another tharapy appointment.”

Peter: Hey, doesn’t it smell like updog in here?

Bucky: Haha. Kid I’ve heard this too many ti—

*Dog barks being webbed to the ceiling*

Peter: I knew it smelled like updog in here. I guess it’s from the matter?

Bucky: What’s the matter?

Peter: Nothing much what’s the matter with you?

Steve: Bucky, put down my shield—BUCKY—