A Lazy Pretence Of A Boy.

A Lazy Pretence Of A Boy.

“So, you’ve come back to Hogwarts. Our splendid Saviour. The greatest of bloody heroes. Why are you hesitating? Cowering by the door like some first-year Hufflepuff? Enter. You’ve here to gloat, aren’t you, Potter? Here to brag? Here to shove your living, breathing face into mine?”

“No… Mafo- Draco. No. I’m not here to brag. It’s been… It’s been more than ten years. McGonagall asked me to come back. Asked me to talk to you… Your behaviour around the school isn’t acceptable. Appearing in front of the first-years, with half of your skin burnt off? You’re frightening them, Draco. They’re just kids.”

“Just kids? Fuck, but it’s true what the students say. You’ve turned into a spineless Ministry drone! We were just kids, remember? Just kids who fought a war. You were just a kid when you destroyed He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named. Just a kid when you saved the world. Just a kid when you let me plummet to my death, consumed in the Fiendfyre-”

“And I’m sorry. I’m sorry! I wanted to save you, Draco. That’s why we flew back into the Room… But there was so much smoke. There was so much smoke, and my eyes were stinging, my throat was full of ash, and I could barely see… You hand slipped and then it was too late-”

“Don’t you dare lie! You did it on purpose. You hated me. You wanted me dead. You trapped me here, in these cold stone walls for time without end. The war hasn’t ended for me, Potter, and it never will! I don’t need your sympathy. Go back to Ginevra. Go back to your family, and leave me alone.”

“I didn’t marry Ginny, and I don’t have children... Bloody hell. You’re every bit as melodramatic a ghost as you were alive, drifting through corridors and waiting in dark corners. The war hasn’t ended for me, either! You think I don’t see your face, every day of my life? I hear the silence of your muted scream in every silent room I enter. I feel the lick of those flames in every fireplace-“

“Shut up! Go home! You killed me. Trapped me forever in this dark limbo. There are so many faces, Potter. All of them are getting older… All of them growing, laughing, kissing, fucking! Everything I never had. Everything I was never allowed. My life was naught but pure-blood formality and expectations, snuffed out before it even began-”

“Wouldn’t you rather leave? There’s a ritual. It’s old magic, dark spell work, but I’ve managed it before. You’d be freed from this reality… Finally free of Hogwarts.”

“The Libertatem Mori? I’ve heard tell of it from the other ghosts. They say that it’s as painless as falling asleep, though those insipid fools dare not take the final step.”

“Do you dare, Draco? I wanted to save you when we were boys, but I couldn’t. Give me this, please. Let me save you this time-“

“I’ll never let you save me. The boy I was, when I was alive… He loved you, more than any other on the earth... Everyday he waited for you to see his pain and his torment, but you never did! You were blind to him. Even when he stood before you, in tears, you chose instead to lacerate him. So now I’ll wait here, a hazy pretence of a boy who coveted and craved, diaphanous where once I was flesh. I’ll stay here, in the halls and corridors of your childhood, a cold imitation of a life once lived. Every day you live in this world, I’ll be here, waiting for you to die. Go away now and live. Live the life you denied me.”

Thank you mags for beautiful cover art. ❤

This was written for @gameofdrarry Exploding Snap.

Prompt: Write a Drarry fic of 544-816 words following this prompt: Harry and Draco meet in the Room of Requirement. Why are they meeting? Use only dialogue.

Dumbledore: You seem to be spending a great amount of time with that Slytherin student—Malfoy.. I was wondering if.. perhaps..

Harry: Malfoy? No, no, of course not.. We’re just friends.

Please de not repost or edit. Reblogs are allowed.

Part 2 requested by @textrovert-01 @missdrarrydawn sorry for taking so long. Hope you like it.

TW ⚠️- BLOOD MENTION, SUICIDE ATTEMPT

" you are too young to take the case Harry " Kingsley sighed

" Mr. Shackebolt I'd rather be thrown out of the trial for being too young than not to try to save a kid that I know is absolutely innocent "

" you don't know that Harry-"

" but I do. I know he is innocent and I believe him" Harry snapped.

" Harry, ministry doesn't work on belief system. Even if I try to persuade the ministry, he will still be a death eater-"

" one that he was forced to become. Mr. Shackebolt, I beg you. Please "

Shackebolt shut off his eyes for a moment, sighing before he let out the words of wisdom " I will try "

" that's all I need " and Harry walked out of his office, hardly making through the stampede of people.

It took him almost a week to finally get Draco's under him, with limitations that he would be under supervision.

" any of evidence's found ?" Harry asked as he sat down in the swamp of files and books relating to the case, for defense.

" we went through his things and this was all that we could find. Nothing relevant. Just a couple of notes, hate letters and school thing's" the auror distastefully said

" leave me all of it and kindly leave the room " Harry Replied with much resilience not to snap at him.

The auror walked out of the room rather disappointed or with expression full of hatred. It wasn't such a surprise to him anymore. Ever since the news flooded out he wanted to speak against the defense for the malfoy family, he's gotten support and hatred both but mostly severely judged. And harry tried his best to not let it effect him.

He went through most of the hate letters he received from a ton of people he actually knew back from school, a lot of people who helped him during the war. To say he wasn't surprised by the immaturity of people to hate on death eaters without giving them a chance to defend themselves. Some of the letters were so harsh that Harry had to practically incendio them but it wasn't of any use knowing letters to Draco were already read. Spending almost 3 hours in the room, he got fed up of Reading letter and Decided to go out. He was about to even walk out of the ministry when he passed by the juvenile prisoners and decided to pay Draco a visit to have a one to one conversation with him to know if he could be of any use.

" visitor to Draco malfoy" Harry told the man behind the desk who almost became Shocked to death quite literally at seeing Harry. Again, not such a surprising thing anymore.

" Draco malfoy, sir "

" right, right, of course. You have the permission ?" He asked

" I - I don't but I know Kingsley shacklebolt, I can get him to get me in " Harry almost threateningly said

" th- that won't be required. Cell no. 21" the man almost mewled and gave Harry the key to the cell.

Rolling his eyes, Harry walked off to Draco's cell not knowing exactly why he was paying him a visit or what exactly was he going to say when he meets Draco.

But it wasn't required because when he reached the cell, it was completely dark with Only someone lying in the corner. Assuming he must be sleeping, Harry almost walked until he didn't feel Right and walked into the cell, finding him too limp to move. Harry kneeled down to Draco's eye level but they were shut closed.

" Malfoy, hey, can you hear me ?" Harry slapped Draco's cheeks lightly to bring him into consciousness.

" hey, Draco. What's wron- holy fuck " Harry immediately gasped as his eyes fell upon the blood oozing out from his wrist.

Panting heavily in panic, Harry pushed away his sleeves to reveal multiple cuts down his wrist, losing blood more than usual.

" help, I need someone in here. A medic " Harry yelled loudly for someone to at least hear his faint voice if possible.

" Draco I need you to look at me, come on. Wake up " Harry heavily rasped as his voice started to break down in the fear of holding someone innocent who might be dead.

He placed his fingers on Draco's neck meeting with only faint heartbeat.

" please, Just. Don't give up. I'm gonna get you out of here " Harry whimpered. He tore a part of his shirt and tied around his wrist and without procrastinating picked Draco up in his arms.

With much difficulty and almost out of breath, Harry finally reached the key holder.

" I need you to call st. Mungo's right now" he shouted at the man before running forward out of the cells.

He was almost out when he caught attention of just the person he needed.

" what's wrong with him?" Mr. Shackebolt asked in deadening shock

" attempt to suicide possibly. He's still alive. We need to get him to the hospital right now" he hadn't even realised how hurriedly and loudly he was talking until he realised he had even gather unwanted attention.

" we must not apparate harry. There's a medic car right out. We'll take that "

And harry nodded following him to the car.

__________________________

Draco opened his eyes to the room he immediately hated to be in.

" please let it be hell " Draco whispered under his breath

" you'd wish that wouldn't you ?" Someone asked. Draco roamed his eyes around the room to find a dark figured revealing itself.

" kind of was hoping that " Draco replied as he tried to get up but was met with help immediately, realising the dark figure was none other than harry.

" what are you doing here ?" Draco asked, wincing when Harry's hands accidentally touched his Wrist.

" oh- well- I think you should be asking what are you doing here " Harry gave him a small smile. He went across the room, Poured a glass of water and gave it to Draco, who took it without reluctance.

" well yes and that too " Draco nodded

" well let's start at the beginning, I had somehow an instinct that you had attempted suicide and ran up for it and then I bought you here " Harry grinned in a fake way.

" okay, now what's the actual reason ?"

Harry sighed, sitting down on the chair next to his bed " first I need you to answer if you're okay ?"

Draco frowned before whispering a small yes.

" I don't get it, how am I still here Harry ?"

Harry sucked in his cheeks thinking through to tell Someone how they're here who had wished upon to be dead until he decided, he deserved to know.

" I have news for you. Want to hear the good news or the bad news ?"

" what ? You know What whatever is fine. Just tell me the good news "Draco shook his head impatiently.

" well, your mom is on house arrest for 2 years with validation to leave the house only with aurors on duty and next, you've won the trial. But you are on probation for 6 months " harry replied, leaning back into his chair.

" I've won- how is that possible? I wasn't even there ?" Draco let his confusion entirely pour out without thinking through the fact that he was still talking to his arch nemesis.

" according to decree no. 40 of the laws and regulations of ministry of magic, a juvenile in life threatened situation, may or may not be present in the court to defend themselves if they have a defendants on their side to provide with relevant evidence "

" and who must be my defendant- it was you, wasn't it ?"

Harry sighed " I was. Not because I pitied you or anything. I was on your defense before you even tried to commit anything. I was only going to come and talk to you about the case when I found you, well covered In blood and unconscious "

" you didn't had to save me. I did it for a reason-"

" a reason that was absurd enough " harry fought back.

" you don't make my decisions for me potter. I make my own decisions and it was mine to do this to myself "

" so what, you just wanted me to leave you there to die, are you nuts ?" Harry frustratingly voiced.

" of course-"

" then I'm sorry to inform you, that's not me malfoy-"

" obviously because your saviour complex would never be able to do that. Leave someone to die. Haven't you got enough fame to be the saviour that you had save my life, again ?" Draco yelled despite being in a weak composure.

" it's not my saviour complex. It's humanity. I'd save any life that I can. Like I did on the night of the war just like you saved mine in the manor " Harry exhaled heavily not realising he had stood up.

" the entire wizarding world was on your shoulder. Your life mattered-"

" yours did too. You think your life doesn't matter, that nobody cares about it but I saw your mother cry when she saw your body in the hospital. I for the first time saw your father feel something, I saw your idiot of a friend pansy cry over. I saw my friends giving you condolences. I don't give a shit about how your life mattered or not , to me, it did and that's the end of it "

Agitated, Harry passed his hands through his hair, breathing heavily.

" it doesn't change anything, it still didn't matter. I decided to do this to myself and - is that bandage on your hand ?" Draco looked more closely at Harry's hands.

" what- yeah. That's well, you lost too much blood by the time we bought you here that they had to do blood transfusion. Muggle way. It was sort of my idea but your blood either matched with your father who by ministry's order couldn't get a free release. So it was me or him. They went for me "

" so- y- you donated your blood t- to me ?" Draco was flushed by either embarrassment or fondness.

" sort of yeah. I mean I had to " Harry sighed as he collapsed back into the chair.

" oh " Draco frowned as he looked down in his lap wondering what he should've said next.

" I did see your letter too " Harry said after momentary silence.

" why would you do it ? Haven't you saved my life enough times do it once again?" Draco was more touched than he allowed himself to be but the fact that the person he gave a reason to hate him his entire life, saved his life multiple times without hesitation, it rendered him completely foresaken.

" ma- draco, it isn't about how many times I save your life, it's that I know your worth saving.. it's hard to believe even for me but you're not the bad guy. You never were and that's the bottom line. You can call it my saviour complex but I've seen people die and- i- just could not see more people dying if I could save them. Don't you see it already, you're not meant to die, not right now atleast. That night you could've died in the fire but you didn't because you could've been saved and I did that. You tried to voluntarily die again, but then again, you were meant to be saved and there I was. And blood transfusion, again you were meant to be saves again-"

" by you-"

" it's not about me. It's that you always had someone around to make you live through, on every verge of death. Like me, I never die " harry chuckled lightly to cut the thick tension in the room and he knew he didn't fail when he saw a faint smile on draco's face.

" I know why you wanted to. I saw all the hateful letters and after everything I understand why you would want to stop living but the truth is, if there's someone who deserves to die more than you, should be me but yet here I am. Living another day "

When he met with no response, he dragged his chair closer to draco's bed and resumed speaking.

" there's been plenty of times I've wanted everything to just stop. Infinite times. I can list reason why I should give up, even when i wanted to I didn't.. I've literally got no family left of me draco but my friends. My heart ache to meet the people who could've raised me. Sirius was the only person close to a family I've ever gotten but then I lost him and I cannot tell you how much I had cried over losing him, I wanted that pain to just stop with voldemort practically living in my head, I didn't wanted to be the person I am as of today, I really wished for something different but I couldn't have it. I remember yelling at professor Dumbledore , throwing thing's at him even after losing him but I had no choice. I've wanted to give up so so many times, but I knew I couldn't, I shouldn't because there's people out there who still care. There's probably people in future that would care about you, and if not people your friend's, me" harry almost blushed at last

" you ? You care about me ?" Draco frowned

" I- it's- well- I wouldn't call it not Caring though but that's not the point. I've pretty much hated you all my life Malfoy, but even then you do not deserve to die. You've done awful things but none even close to killing Someone and you wanna know why, because you couldn't do it. I was there when you were supposed to kill Dumbledore, but I saw you lowering your wand. You didn't wanted to kill him and that's because you're not the bad guy, you're just someone with no choice, like me" harry pressed his lips in a thin line looking at the way draco was staring at him with a strange appreciation.

Draco remained silent. He knew that whatever harry said wasn't entirely going to stop him from feeling bad about himself but coming from harry, it meant to him a lot more than he could've ever expressed.

" why? I thought you always hated me, then the trial, my life ? I came to kill you the night of the war, how could you possibly want to defend me ?"

" did you really wanted to kill me ? If you wanted to, you Could've, instead of standing there talking to me. And about hate, trust me I had better people to hate than just you. And above everything, I knew you were innocent. I always knew it " harry replied shrugging.

Draco huffed out a breath of air still pondering over whether he should thank harry or throw him out of the window for saving his life.

" I can't believe you think I'm worth saving " draco whispered looking at his twitching fingers on his lap.

" I can't believe I was worth saving for you, twice " Harry gave him a small smile.

And draco couldn't say anything else. His anger dissolved somewhere in harry admitting that draco was worth saving and smiling at him and he couldn't find it in himself to be angry again. How can you mad at someone who gave an entire speech of to why you deserved to be saved.

" you said there's bad news . What is it ?" Draco finally asked at last

" oh- right- the bad news you're going to be under my observation because I was among the only defence on your case who cared enough to volunteer to look after. So voila you'll be staying with me in grimauld place, which by the way I think technically is still half yours "

" live with you ? Why ?"

" as I said, observation. Probation. And you are in no state to look after your own self "

" you aren't so yourself " draco scanned harry, not taking more than a moment to realise harry was himself not in the finest shape.

" well if that is- you look after me and I'll look after you. Let's make that a deal?" Harry actually, genuinely smiled.

Draco gave a low painful laugh nodding his head.

" I should go by the way. My visiting hours, starts again at night. So I'll meet you then. It's good to see you, alive again " harry stood up, pressing his hands against one another in a single clap.

" yea- I'll see you then " draco pressed his lips in a firm line, nodding at harry.

" alright " and harry walked towards the door.

" po- harry ?"

" yeah ?" Harry turned around only for a moment

" thank you and also sorry for everything I've put you through "

Harry smiled at draco " I've already forgiven you. Forgive your own self draco. It all starts there "

And with harry left, leaving draco to smile after exactly one minute of comprehending everything. Someone to look after him after everything didn't sound as bad anymore.

( the difference in my writing since I first wrote it and now, amazes me. Thank you for making me do this )

Requests accepted.

Draco Malfoys letter before he died

" Today I want to tell you a story of a fucked up family where a boy grew up with a father and mother who only quarrelled in the house and that man of the house didn't treat his women right like she was some pedestal he could stand on . A family where the dinners were silent and if talked , only talked about planning murders . A house which should've been a light Lavender was a House filled with black and less lights , just like their lives . A family where it was taught that love makes you weak and is for losers . A family where it was taught that bribing was your way towards everything . A family where the kid was afraid of his father . A family where the kid had been hit because he tried to befriend with some outsider . A family where the murder stories never ended . A family who worshipped the dark lord like he was a saint and gave him a shelter to Live . Would you even call it a house where it never felt like home but a prison !? A prison with relentless screaming , Snickers of death eaters , with blood almost always on the floor! Would you call it a home ?! Would you !

Did anyone even wonder what happened to that boy who lived in the house ! No Because why would they , after all he was the son of a death Eater ! But no-one wanted to hear his story , who he wanted to be , what he wanted and why he wanted . Nobody cared about how he felt scared everyday , nobody cared about how he lived in that house tucked away in the corner of his room , away from the world because it was his escape. Nobody cared to teach him how to treat other people but everyone judged him when he treated then wrong . Nobody cared who he was outside school because all they cared about was to hate him because he made them hate him . This boy grew up thinking love cannot run in his veins and there would be no one to tell him how to smile and how to treat people . This boy grew up thinking just like his father even if he never wanted to but this boy grew up being judged by the entire world. Oh what a crime it was to be a death eaters child but did anyone ask him that when the time came , did he wanted to he death Eater !? Did he feel proud when he got that ugly scar on his hand ? Why , no body asked him because it was his fate ?! Fate was it !

This is me , the boy who never knew love ! The boy with a fucked up family ! No body would believe if I had said I was forced to be death Eater , why would they ? After all it was my fate wasn't it ! Everyone thought I was proud to be one of them , did anyone ask me though ? No , why ? Because you were Afraid that my answer would be different and you'd not be able to see me as a slightly better person ?

People said I had a choice ! Do you really think so ? Sat amongst death eaters , a man who without a spell could kill my family , me and anyone I could call dear to me ! Do you think I had a choice when that lingering snake was over the dinner table who I've seen murder people everyday !? Do you think I had a choice when the dark lord was breathing on my neck asking me if my answer was a no ? Do you think I had a choice when my father was looking at me a threatening eyes ? Do you think I had a choice !? You think ? You call me a coward , maybe I am but tell me would you not have done the same if your family was at stake ? Wouldn't you do everything to protect them , to protect yourself ?

But everyone judged the born of the death Eater , not the saviour of the wizarding world ! Nobody judged him when he got played by dark lord to go to ministry of magic ! Nobody judged him when he gave up the prophecy because his friends lives were at stake ! Nobody judged Ron , Hermione or harry when they destroyed the gringotts because they had to get the horcruxes ! Nobody judged Ginny when she was possessed because she was small ?

Any of me comparing wouldn't count as anything , why , because they became legend and I became a taint on human being ! Because they saved lives and I didn't . Because they were on the right side and I wasn't . Because I wasn't as courageous enough as them? Because their stories for told and mine didn't !

But today the story ends here , tonight. I Draco malfoy confess to my sins because I don't know how much more hate can I take , I don't know how much judging I can take , I don't know how much more threating glances I can take . So tonight I do a favour of dying . For once I want to save myself from hatred but give myself to death

Crime committed :

son of a death Eater , suicide at 17

Yours truly

Draco Malfoy "

_______________________

I have an idea to continue this ! I might reblog it later and continue but for now it is what it is !

Draco: * swatting Harry's hand's away *

Draco: what are you trying to do ?

Harry: trying to be romantic ?? Putting hand in your back pocket, haven't you seen in the movies?

Draco: oh, put it back then *protrudes his ass*

Harry : nah, the moments gone

Draco: what, no just hold it?

Harry: come on, no..

Draco : okay just put slightly inside ?

Harry: no

Draco : HARRY WOULD YOU JUST GRAB MY FUCKING ASS!!

Meanwhile Someone who Only heard " okay just put it slightly inside " : people these days.. eh.. I'd like that

Broken attic

For @drarrymicrofic prompt : ash/dust

The door clinks open and draco walks in with so much of a sigh from a long tiring day and just wanting to fall into the embrace of his husband.

" harry"

" harry?"

Draco suspiciously walks further in

" harry? Love? Where are you ?" Draco echoes

But still met with no response

" dar- harry- what the fuck " draco exclaims as harry falls through the wooded roof covered in dust

" oh- hey babe " harry grins from the middle of the ground

" what happened- no what is wrong with you ? Why the hell are you grinning when you literally just fell off from the roof and the hole harry " draco worries as he kneeled and help up his husband

" oh never mind the roof you- this is so worth it. Look what I found " harry grins walking limply

" we should probably first take a look at your legs though " draco sounded worrisome as he noticed Harry's legs

" Merlin you, it'll just be a sprain, who cares. This is so worth it. Now see " harry pushes forward the book he had found. Draco shook his head at the absurdity.

" what is this? " Draco asked as he took the dusty box from harry

" open it " harry excitedly said

" it's all the cards we gave each other when we first started going out and some of our Polaroids " harry explained

" And you went into the attic to search this ?" Draco frowned as he opened the box and briskly looked at the cards and pictures

" of course. I want to show our soon to be kid how cringe of a couple we are " harry grinned

Draco covered his face laughing, Shaking his head " you're just as ridiculous as Arthur "

" but we love Arthur, don't we ?" Harry innocently asked tilting his head

Draco kissed the top of Harry's head, encircling his arms around Harry's waist " we do babe, we do "

Harry slumped down on the couch taking the box away " mia would love this"

" since when did we decide on mia? It'll be sheryl " draco too slumped down next to his husband, taking his leg into his lap and analysing carefully

" we'll see Mr. Potter " harry grinned and then groaned as draco casted an episky

" yes we'll see Mr. Malfoy "draco gave him a flying kiss before taking the box from him and dissolved into laughter as they both read cards after cards.

I had such a different plan for this but this sounded much more cuter..

I like your writing so much !!

Can you please write something where Harry is sick and Draco takes care of him?

45. There's no me without you

Prompt- feeling their temperature | Thank you so much for requesting this, I tried to give my very best, however I'm pretty sure the ending didn't turn up that great.

| Harry is diagnosed with a terminal disease | ANGST | HURT COMFORT |

" you called for us ?" Draco asked as he sat down with harry in the chairs in front of the desk.

" how is my favourite couple doing ?" The healer asked with a gracious smile

" mind me, but it's sound's a bit- well- like there's some bad news " harry pointedly almost slightly worried.

The healer's head bowed, in disgrace of not being able to conceal " before I tell you this, please don't be mad. You know I'd do anything to help you as much as I can "

" you're scaring us Ms. Carnballer " draco's fingers automatically held Harry's hand in a tight grip unknowingly

She sighed, pushing the files towards the couple " after the accident of last week, you had required a full body scan and the results came in today "

" wh- what's does it say then ?" Draco's voice quivered, not even being able to read the words on the parchment

" it's my regret to inform you, harry suffers from a terminal disease, plaganeisis. It's somewhat very familiar to muggle..."

But harry was already falling. All the voices were fading and all his vision fading. He knew something was ought to go wrong sometime, but this soon, he didn't expect. His mind rapidly rushed to all the promises he would break, all the promises of spending his forever with draco, only his forever was now limited.

" Mr. Potter, are you listening ?"

" harry, honey " draco violently shook Harry's body on the chair which has gone into unconscious paralysis.

"huh?" Harry voiced

" I said, you're not so severe. But the disease is ought to spread. I- maybe you should take some time and relax yourself. Why don't I just talk to Mr. Malfoy right now ?" She asked sympathetically. Normally harry would've denied and requested to stay but his mind was spiralling into fading into consciousness to unconsciousness, so harry nodded and slowly left the room and waited outside with his thoughts.

Harry didn't talk to anyone properly for an entire week after that, even to his friends who stopped by his place to console him. It was as if the death seemed nearer than it already was. All he thought for days was about his numbered days and leaving draco so broken beyond his comprehension. If harry cared only Little about himself, he would sneak a peek at draco and stare at him looking out of the window, sadly until he'd turn to harry with a smile. It broke his heart to even think about draco after him. They'd only been together for 3 years, in which they had hurriedly married last year, but they had never regretted that decision until very this moment, harry wondered how would it be to let him go.

" I think you should break up with me and find yourself Someone who isn't dying " harry had said one day on the dinner table

Draco only looked at harry strangely, not responding or eating. Harry only remembered hearing draco's cries late in the night when he assumed harry was asleep. He wanted to make his pain stop, but how could he.

This was until harry met with the healer once again.

" harry, I need you to understand that your death would only be nearer if you're thinking it's near. Keeping yourself motivated right now would seem very hard right now but you have to understand that you're hurting other people around you with forcing them to leave you because you think it'd hurt less. I've told you this before and I'll tell you this again, you can prolong your life for as long as your body wants. If you're forcing yourself to surrender yourself to death, you'd be dead very soon but if you don't, you'd Maybe live another 10 years "

" it will hurt, I know. Leaving everything broken. But make the most of it right now,as much as you can. Draco needs you right now and so do you and you have to remember that " Ms. Carnballer softly smiled at harry from the opposite side. It was then when harry realised, he's not dead, not yet. He's still alive. He still is.

And that very night, harry entered the house with a cake, called over his close friends and spent his time, relished it, till he could. It was an improvement and his friends were very happy to see that but that didn't stop them from giving him a sympathies, pity hugs, hugs for longer than usual. For once harry didn't mind, even if it was somewhere Breaking him inside.

" what was all this ?" Draco furiously asked after everyone had left

" what ?"harry asked confused.

" what was the point of all this ? A reminder that you're dying soon ? " Draco's eyes glimmered with sad tears or anger, that was yet to be figured.

" draco-"

" no- you can't Just barge into the house with a damn cake and call over your friends and spend the night as if nothing has happened. Or tell me I should find someone new. do you even realise how horrid I felt when you told me to leave you and find someone who would never be anywhere equal to you and-" but then he broke down onto the chair behind him, heaving violently as he covered his mouth to not release the screams, the sound of pain.

Harry's heart broke to see Draco like that. In the process of turning on the switch, he forgot that if there was anyone in the world who would be most effected by Harry's death, it would be him. And harry had never understand, nor probably will understand how draco must be feeling.

Harry kneeled down in front of draco, his eyes swimming with tears leaking with water to pour. He took the hand that covered draco's lips and kissed them softly, leaving a droplet of tear over his fist.

" everything is not fine draco, it would probably not even be and we can't change that but now more than ever I need you and you need me. You more than me, this will probably be the last moments I spend with you and I don't want to spend that time fighting with you. I want us to fight together. You're right, I didn't realise how I was imposing on you to find Someone new without even thinking because I assumed it would be easier for both of us and now I clearly know it's not. I can't change what's about to happen love, but we can spend each and every moment making memories that will never leave you. I don't want to see you in pain, ever.. I love today and I will love you tomorrow and I will love you from my grave but we both need to understand that. Will you spend my numbered days with me ?" Harry's voice was soft as honey,as if he wanted to conceal both of them from the already bitterness of the situation but again that Infact what they should be doing.

Draco nodded sobbing, kissing harry for the first time in a while because harry allowed to.

" let's make it count, yeah ?" Draco sighed, theirs forehead against another

" yes " harry replied with closed eyes. Maybe it made it all better.

The next few months, harry's condition only became worse. He started losing weight like heavy bricks, his face sucking in, his fingers shaking even to pick up a cup, his eyes becoming home to sunken eyes with dark circles. Harry had lost that innocence on his face and metaphorically his eyes were losing their lively look and if even so they pretended everything was fine, they both sobbed when the other one wasn't around, draco crying more mostly because he felt helpless.

" you have to help me Ms. Carnballer, I can't- I don't want to lose him. I'd much rather die than lose harry. He's the only thing in my life that makes sense. Please- please I beg you " draco sobbed harshly, pleading, begging.

" it's my immense regret-"

" I don't need sympathies. I need to help harry. I don't want him to die. There must be something, anything we can do to save him. please, I'm literally begging " draco cried.

Ms. Carnballer leaned into her chair, sighing. It was painful to see draco like this, even for her even though she saw people like that everyday but none so desperate like him. Draco looked like he hadn't slept for days, he hadn't, he hadn't eaten properly. In taking care of harry, he had forgotten to take care of his own self. That wasn't his priority.

" I will tell you truth draco, the researches are in progress. There's no cure as for now but if I must say, there must be cure. Nature would never create that It can't find a cure to. I can't promise how Long it will take to find a cure, I hope soon but all I can give you right now is hope. I can prescribe stronger medicines but that's the most I can help "

And with that Draco's helplessly and angrily went home, finding harry out of the bed.

" harry, you're not supposed to get up" draco signed as he put his bags on table, roaming around to find harry. And he did find harry sitting by the window.

" how are you feeling ?" Draco asked as he went closer to harry

" do you want me to tell you the truth or the same lie I tell you each day " harry had been crying and draco knew this by his rough voice.

Draco sighed " let's get you back into the bed. I'll make the dinner-"

" no. Draco. I'm tired. I'm tired of seeing you tiredly coming home each day, making dinner for me, telling me everything will be fine one day when you and I both know it won't be. Stop wasting your time on me. I'm meant to die and I will die " harry told Draco nonchalantly

" wh- I thought we had this conversation and we were done with this Absurdity " draco furiously threw his hands in the air.

Harry turned to Draco, stepping down from the window, standing still.

" you are wasting your life draco. I can't see that. In taking care of me look what have you done to your own self. When was even the last time you shaved or ate a proper dinner or went out with friends or just watched a movie and fell asleep on the couch without a care in the world. You think I don't watch you. I watch you like a hawk draco and I can't let you do this to yourself. This is brutal, harsh, painful to even watch " harry threw

" painful?" Draco scoffed " what do you know about pain harry. You tell me you don't want to hurt me, that you can't see me in pain but everyday you reach new heights of hurting me. It's hurts me everyday to watch you lose yourself little by little. It's brutal and harsh that after everything you will leave me alone to spend the rest of my life alone. I miss being myself but now all I think of is how can i take your pain away. It physically hurts me that I can't do anything to save you. It's cruel and brutal of the world to take you away from me when you're the Only thing that makes me want to live another day and when you're gone, how would I even possibly survive. I cry nights away because I can't stop your pain. After everything you've been through in your life, this isn't what you deserve and it's hurts me to every single core of my soul, my body and my heart. I'd much rather prefer death right now " draco yelled crying.

" If I am such a burden draco, please for the love of Merlin leav-" but harry had started coughing harshly. His body doubled over and in instincts, draco helped him to the couch and fetched water, calming his throat immediately.

Draco started crying rapidly, it was as if large crystal balls were dripping down his eyes and they didn't cease at all " I don't want to fight you. I don't- but I'm so hurt. I'm in pian harry, Maybe less than you but it's just- I can't lose you" draco took Harry's hands in how own, drawing circles over his hand.

" I know draco, I know. I wanted to-"

" no harry. It should be me consoling you yet everytime its you consoling me. There is so much wrong with this, but I don't want to console you because I can't stand losing you. I won't survive a day without you harry. I can't. I don't want to " draco sobbed. Harry gave Draco a sad smile, engulfing draco into a hug and kissing the top of his head.

" well I am Always the better one so " and draco finally chuckled, for the first time in months.

It occurred him that night when harry had fallen asleep, after checking his temperature for any signs that if nobody is going to help save harry, draco will do it himself.

And that very night he apparated to Hermione's place.

" I need help "

" about time " Hermione smirked as she led him into her study and they discussed all night about Harry's condition, anatomically the part of his body affected the worst and how can the spread possibly be stopped. Until Draco disapparated for the first time relieved before harry woke up.

It was another 1 month of brainstorming when one night, Hermione found it.

" it's the bone marrow "

" what ?" Draco confusedly asked

" the spread is only through his blood, right ? And bone marrow is the major manufacturer of helper stem cells in the body that would bring up his immunity. It's not the problem with the cells draco, its the bone marrow. Because harry is sickening, the strength of the production of-"

" the helper cells is reducing and if we just know how to fix that then the leukocytes and his platelets count would increase, thereby his body can fight itself "

" yes "

They both remained silent for a long time, until Hermione finally called Madame pomfrey from ages ago knowing she was the Only one who still performed old school magic for treatment of some very vital disease.

" Hermione, remember in second year when harry broke his arm ?" Draco asked suddenly

" what ? Of course "

" remember gilderoy instead of fixing Harry's arm, basically vanished his bone ?"

" of course. If we could reintroduce finer bone marrow-"

" without the aftermath of graft, harry would become healthy because his body will not reject it "

" call ms. Carnballer immediately "

And Ms. Carnballer agreed .

" of course, it was the muggle theory we failed to apply " ms. Carnballer said In a bit suspicious voice

" but ?" Both of them asked

" it seems too easy. I mean no wonder it might be the solution to it but if just seems so simple. If it were that simple, why couldn't wizards had thought of it before? It just seems as if this will have some drawback "

And then it hit them, it was a little too easy. After discussing, draco headed home with Ms. Carnballer telling him to wait for until she was sure of it.

Only time ran out. Draco was half an hour late than usual today and harry hadn't even woken up, even though he would've normally woken up..

Draco kneeled down next to harry, trying to wake him but harry gave no response. He was still breathing but his heartbeat was falling down little by little. In between panic attack, draco immediately dialled up Ron and Hermione.

" we need to immediately go to st. Mungo's"

And they didn't need more notice. They immediate disapparated to their place with Ron warming up the car and Hermione helping carry harry to the car.

" it will be fine. Everything will be fine " Hermione reassured him but draco had lost every shred of his sanity and was dripping all wet with tears.

" I can't lose him Hermione " draco cried as he held harry closely to himself with Ron almost flying the car

" you won't draco. He's a fighter " Ron assured.

Nodding, draco held harry more firmly to himself, whispering " I love you " and " please don't leave me " In Harry's ear. Ron and Hermione only shared looks.

______________________________

" would you at least try ? " Draco begged Ms. Carnballer

" I-"

" please. It have. 88% chances of Saving harry. Please Ms. Carnballer " Hermione countered.

Ms. Carnballer sighed " the hospital won't be responsible for anything that could go wrong, you must know that "

Draco froze. Anything that could go wrong. Those word's screamed in his head but then there was the faint memory running alongside in his head " it's us against the world. We will try till the end "

" do it " draco confirmed. Hermione looked at him for any hesitation. Met with none, she agreed.

He will not lose harry. He will not.. he can't ?

2 hours in the ward, Ms.carnballer finally came out..

" so ?" Draco asked worried out of his mind

" I- regret- harry is suffering from amnesia as of now " she told sighing heavily

" what do you mean amnesia ? It can't be possible" draco wanted to pound on her but ron held him back.

" it's anterograde. He knows everyone, mostly , but some memories might be lost " she weakly replied

Draco almost fell into Ron's grasp, his tears forming instantly

" can I meet him?"

" you can but don't try to pressurise him or anything. I request you "

Draco heavily nodded, biting off his lip in order to release the horrendous scream boiling inside him.

They all followed into the ward was in. Harry was staring out of the window when Draco approached him a little closer.

" harry ?" Draco asked softly, controlling his tears.

" malfoy ?" Harry turned his head with a frown to draco. It was all it took for draco to understand, he didn't remember them..but he wanted to try.

" you don't remember us?" He asked

" what do you mean ?" Harry asked.

Draco immediately turned around to ron and Hermione, who consoled him.

" he doesn't remember us" draco weeped.

" oh goodness I didn't expect you'd cry like a baby " harry chuckled

Frowning In tears draco turned around " what ?" He sniffed

" I could forget you, like you'd let me " harry raises an eyebrow at Draco comically

" what do you mean? She just told me you got amnesia- I don't believe you "

" alright. I got married to you last year on 31st October, at Malfoy manor. Ring a bell " harry quipped

" but she just- you told her to lie? Didn't you ?" Draco narrowed his eyes at harry

" of course. It was fun " harry laughed softly

" you fucking arsehole. You almost gave me heart attack " draco sneered

" but it didn't happen, so we're all good " harry shrugged

" tell me I can break his face " draco looked at Ron

" I'd agree with you unless he looked like this and unless I knew about this " Ron shrugged

" Ron!!! I wanted to say that " Hermione hit him on the shoulder

" you were in on this ?" Draco looked back and forth between both.

" you'd think otherwise. Of course we were in on it. Harry I'd give you a 2.5 for acting. That was shit " Ron raised an eyebrow at harry

" you tell me that when your wife cries like a damn baby " harry rolled his eyes

" I don't understand?" Draco's face filled with confusion after confusion.

Ron and Hermione shared a look before Hermione spoke up " let harry explain, we'll wait outside until your little war would be over "

And they walked out.

" come and sit " harry patted next to him, making some space for him.

In all anger draco narrowed his eyes at harry but at the same time he couldn't be more glad to be with this harry again "you better have a nice explanation " and sat down next to harry on the bed.

" so this happened last week. I woke up in the middle of night and I wanted to look for you but I couldn't find you, I assumed you must've gotten busy with something but when the next night same thing happened, I talked with Ron and Hermione about that. I was really worried for you and I just wanted to know if you were okay. I initially went to them to talk to them about taking care of you, looking after you mostly when I'm gone and told them the whole disappearance thing. It was then Hermione told me that you were trying to look for a cure. I can't tell you how proud I was and am of you. I really am. But you were doing it secretly and I wanted to maintain that until last night, Hermione, rang me and told me that you've got it. And you fell asleep outside for a while, great thing to do while you're husband is in a ward fighting death. They came in and asked for my approval on whatever it was that you guys came up with, of course it would have some drawbacks as Ms. Carnballer said but I wanted to go through with it just as much as you-"

" you did ?"

Harry frowned, taking draco's hands in his own " draco, it's not my choice to die. But if i were given one, I'd never want to die and leave you. There no you without me, nor me without you. Of course the amnesia idea was Mine to scare you. Hermione called it dumb "

" it was dumb " Draco chuckled softly

" look at me draco " and he did

" I've never regretted anything in my life than these last few months because of the pain you've suffered because of me. Even if I were to die Draco, I- I don't know what Would've happened. I'm really sorry for everything-"

" hey, you don't have to apologise. Remember I promised to take you in sicknesses and in health. It doesn't matter harry whatever happens, I'd always take care of you. I just can't lose you. These last few months had been terrible and I never want to go through something like that ever again " draco smiled shyly as he kissed Harry's hands in his own.

" and he won't" a voice interjected behind them..

" ms. Carnballer ?" Draco turned slightly to get a good look of her

" you've fought valiantly harry. The cure that your husband and miss Granger came up with had Little to no side effects, which probably won't show up until very late in life "

" what sort of side effects ?" Draco asked

" you don't have to worry about the disease falling back in again. Side effects however may include slight pain for over a couple of months in the bones and probably anemia, tiredness. You'll have a bit of fitness problem at some point in your life harry. You will have to look out for any illness for the next two years very carefully though. And that's about it "

Harry and Draco looked at each other in relief..

" we did it then ?" Draco smiled

" you did it " harry diligently said

" you've officially fought death, hm, let me see my record, 6 times. That should go in the Guinness world book record " Ron joked as they walked in after that

And the room again filled with laughter.

In the end some fights are worth fighting for.

It is my immense regret for being so incredibly late at delivering the request this late for the inability to probably provide what you expected. Also regretful for not being able to do a stand alone prompt. (Also plaganeisis is no disease). Happy reading. I tried my best.

Requests open

Day 44- how to get away with murder| Day 46- old habits